------------
I think that is what I was trying to say. Forgive me, today is my B.D. (bad day) and I am having a hard time concentrating. It's not working but I'm trying to occupy my mind. No matter what she gets she is going no where. Just because she might have an appeal coming she must realize it is not a sure thing! One look at what she did and it will be forget it. She is a menace. I dont think she sees this. Manson has been up what, 10 times? :seeya:
Nore- Here's something to occupy your mind :floorlaugh:
======================================================
Changes With Age
1978 Long Hair
2012 Longing for Hair
1978 KEG
2012 EKG
1978 Acid Rock
2012 Acid Reflux
1978 Moving to California Because It's Cool
2012 Moving to Arizona Because It's Warm
1978 Hoping for a BMW
2012 Hoping for a BM
1978 Rolling Stones
2012 Kidney Stones
1978 Disco
2012 Costco
1978 Parents Beg You to Get Your Hair Cut
2012 Children Beg You to Get Their Heads Shaved
1978 Pass Driver's Test
2012 Pass Vision Test
1978 Whatever
2012 Depends
------------------------------------------------------
The Pond
An elderly man in Florida had owned a large farm for several years. He had a large pond in the back.
It was properly shaped for swimming, so he fixed it up nice with
picnic tables, horseshoe courts, and some orange, and lime trees.
One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn't been there for a while, and look it over. He grabbed a five-gallon bucket to bring back some fruit. As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee.
As he came closer, he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny-dipping in his pond. He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end. One of the women shouted to him, 'we're not coming out until you leave!'
The old man frowned, 'I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim naked or make you get out of the pond naked..'
Holding the bucket up he said, 'I'm here to feed the alligator.'
__________________
The Church Dinner
A group of friends who all attended the same church wanted to get together on a regular basis, socialize, and play games. They would meet in each home in rotation and the residents of that house were to provide a meal.
When it came time for Al and Janet to be the hosts, Janet wanted to do something special. She decided to have mushroom-smothered steak. But when she checked at the local greengrocer she was shocked at the cost of their mushrooms. Regretfully she told her husband, "Mushrooms are out. They're too expensive."
He said, "Why don't you go down in the back paddock and pick some of those mushrooms. There are plenty down near the creek." She said, "No, some wild mushrooms are poison."He said, "Well, I see rabbits eating them and they don't seem to suffer any ill effects." So Janet decided to give it a try.. She picked a basket full, then washed, peeled and sliced them for her smothered steak.
Then she went out on the back verandah and gave Ol' Spot (the dog) a dish of the mushrooms. Ol' Spot ate every bite. All morning long, Janet watched Ol' Spot and the wild mushrooms didn't seem to affect him, so she decided to use them.
The meal was a great success. After everyone had finished, they relaxed, socialised, and played '21' and dominos. But then a neighbour knocked on the door and said, Mrs Williams I am sorry to be the bearer of bad tidings but Ol' Spot is dead." Janet went into hysterics.
After she finally calmed down, she called the doctor and told him what had happened. The doctor said, "That's bad, but I think we can take care of it. I will call for an ambulance and I will be there as quickly as possible. We'll give everyone enemas and we will pump out everyone's stomach. Everything will be fine. Just keep them calm.
"Soon an ambulance arrived. The paramedics and the doctor had their suitcases, syringes, and a stomach pump.
One by one, each person was taken into the bathroom and given an enema. Then his or her stomach was pumped out.
After the last one was finished, the doctor came out and said, "I think everything will be fine now," and he left.
They were all looking pretty weak as they sat around the living room. The neighbour, who had stayed at the house through all the drama, sank into a seat beside Janet.
"You know," she said" that fellow who ran over Ol' Spot never even stopped."
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Senior Texting Codes
Now that we oldies can text, here are some helpful texting ideas.
Young people have their acronyms, now seniors have their own texting codes:
Top 10 Senior Texting Codes
* ATD - At the Doctor's
* BFF - Best Friend's Funeral
* BTW - Bring the Wheelchair
* BYOT - Bring Your Own Teeth
* DWI - Driving While Incontinent
* FWIW - Forgot Where I Was
* FYI - Found Your Insulin
* LOL - Living on Lipitor
* ROFL...CGU - Rolling on the Floor Laughing...Can't get Up!
* TOT - Texting on Toilet
* WWNO - Walker Wheels Need Oil
Hope these help. GGLKI (Gotta Go, Laxative Kicking in!)
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Snow in Minnesota
I just got off the phone with a friend who lives in Northern Minnesota. He said that since early this morning the snow has been nearly waist high and is still falling.The temperature is dropping way below zero and the north wind is increasing to near gale force. His wife has done nothing but look through the kitchen window and just stare. He says that if it gets much worse, he may have to let her in.
rinces: :juanettes:
