TN - Timothy Reid, 15 mos, dies in hot car, Chattanooga, 1 May 2007

[southcitymom]

Exactly Southcitymom. I NEVER, ever condemn people when things like this happen, (unless there is proven past neglect or abuse). I doubt very seriously that this man decided that this morning he'd just not bother to be an attentive parent. It was not an intentional act, it was an accident. And yes, IMO an accident is an accident is an accident. (Not saying that at you, just addressing a post I saw above.)

But for the grace of God go I, indeed. No one can feel any worse than this father and it scares and saddens me that some people can just be so judgmental when NO ONE on this earth is perfect, 100% of the time, for their entire life. Some people should count their blessings that nothing bad happened to them those times their guard was down for a moment, instead of bashing a parent who wasn't as lucky.

Often, when I deny that I am incapable of the human failings I see others demonstrate, it is because I am too terrified to think that I could somehow find myself in their shoes.

It is easier and makes me feel safer and more in control of my life to say "That (gruesome painful result) would never happen to me because I would never do XYZ." And I personally cannot imagine a worse pain than having an involvement in the death of my child, so why wouldn't I want to hide from that!?

I think it's human nature to want to protect myself like this, so I'm not too hard on myself when I notice I'm doing it.

However, I learn more about the nature of love and compassion when I am able to recognize the flawed humanity of others in myself. And a big goal for me today is to be more loving and compassionate, because I've never had those principals fail me or seen them fail world at large.

I miss the mark with this goal, but am happy at any progress I'm able to make.

 

[Beyond Belief]

I am so sad. Last year we discussed contacting different companies to put an alarm on carseats to warn parents the child was still in the car. This happens as we have seen over the years. I am so disgusted with myself that we didnt follow through with idea of an alarm.

 

[southcitymom]

SSM - Every time I read one of these, my heart sinks. As a parent, of 3 babies in car seats, I have had this fear myself. None of my kids slept through the night until they were 18 months old, so I have been going through sleep depravation for about 4 years now. Between being exhausted, stressed out, you name it, I find myself doing dumb little things all the time. Every time I get in my hot car, I think about the poor babies who this has happened to. I feel only pure pity for these parents & their babies. Also, as a parent, I think I can say that the father probably feels like any punishment the authorities can dish out will not be any worse than what he is going through right now. I would personally want to die, I don't think I would survive if I accidently caused the death of any of my children.

I agree with every word you wrote, LTC. I only had two tiny ones to handle in carseats and I felt everything you wrote regarding exhaustion and stress...still do sometimes even though they are older now, thank Goodness! I've done plenty of stupid things that could have ended more disastrously.

This father is going through a pain I cannot even begin to understand. God willing, I will never have to touch such heartache. It sounds like he has a strong support netwrok and I hope he is being well-loved.

 

[southcitymom]

I am so sad. Last year we discussed contacting different companies to put an alarm on carseats to warn parents the child was still in the car. This happens as we have seen over the years. I am so disgusted with myself that we didnt follow through with idea of an alarm.

Beyond,

I remember the discussion of the alarm on a similar thread also.

In this case, I think the car (but not the carseat) where the infant was DID have a motion sensor alarm. It sounds like the alarm going off did not trigger the father to think of the child - he turned it off remotely once or twice when it went off.

That's one of the problems with alarms - we become kind of immune to them. Whenever my car alarm goes off, it never crosses my mind that someone might be stealing it - I just want to shut it up as soon as possible.

So the car alarm did not help in this case. I don't know if a car seat alarm would have.

 

[Beyond Belief]

http://www.websleuths.com/forums/showthread.php?t=41883&highlight=harold

Our discussion on an alarm on the child's seat.

 

[southcitymom]

http://www.websleuths.com/forums/showthread.php?t=41883&highlight=harold

Our discussion on an alarm on the child's seat.

It's hard for me to envision how such an alarm would work because I am technically unsavvy. Would it start to go off if the child were left in the seat a certain amount of time after the car is turned off? Is the possible - to connect the seat and the ignition?

 

[Beyond Belief]

I don't think any of us could really answer the questions of "how to" install one. I think if we caused enough fuss maybe one of the manufacturers would jump on it.

 

[LovingTheChaos]

I agree with every word you wrote, LTC. I only had two tiny ones to handle in carseats and I felt everything you wrote regarding exhaustion and stress...still do sometimes even though they are older now, thank Goodness! I've done plenty of stupid things that could have ended more disastrously.

This father is going through a pain I cannot even begin to understand. God willing, I will never have to touch such heartache. It sounds like he has a strong support netwrok and I hope he is being well-loved.

I have really mixed feelings about charging these parents when this happens. Unless the parent intended to leave the child on purpose I don't understand what they hope to accomplish by charging a parent in case of an accident. The bigger deterent for all of us is the possible outcome that the child will die if left in the car. Do they think they are going to make people be more alert by putting parents in jail when this happens? Trust me, the fear of my child dieing in a car is quite enough to strike the fear of God into my heart-much more so than 'jail time'

 

[southcitymom]

I don't think any of us could really answer the questions of "how to" install one. I think if we caused enough fuss maybe one of the manufacturers would jump on it.

Do you know anyone who has ever petitioned manufacturers like that? I mean many of the cars now have the beeping-when-in-reverse thing and I'm sure that came about from kids getting run over.

Wonder how that came about?

ETA - I was doing a little research and it seems like several citizen petitions for companies to change their products for the greater good of the public start with (or include) a lawsuit. Here's just one example: http://www.bantransfats.com/fdapetition.html

 

[southcitymom]

http://www.websleuths.com/forums/showthread.php?t=41883&highlight=harold

Our discussion on an alarm on the child's seat.

Petition effort regarding alarm systems on vehicles in reverse due ti children being run over in driveways

http://www.ipetitions.com/petition/inhonorofvadaschoon/

Petition has 1718 signatures and was initiallu introduced in the House.

 

[shopper]

Beyond,

I remember the discussion of the alarm on a similar thread also.

In this case, I think the car (but not the carseat) where the infant was DID have a motion sensor alarm. It sounds like the alarm going off did not trigger the father to think of the child - he turned it off remotely once or twice when it went off.

That's one of the problems with alarms - we become kind of immune to them. Whenever my car alarm goes off, it never crosses my mind that someone might be stealing it - I just want to shut it up as soon as possible.

So the car alarm did not help in this case. I don't know if a car seat alarm would have.

I never hear a car alarm go off and think "my gosh, someone's trying to steal a car". It's more like "I wish they'd shut that d@mn thing off!!!!" I don't have one nor ever plan to on my car.

 

[Beyond Belief]

I wonder if O'reilly or greta could get something going. You would think it would be as simple as downloading another type alarm to the car's brain.

 

[southcitymom]

I never hear a car alarm go off and think "my gosh, someone's trying to steal a car". It's more like "I wish they'd shut that d@mn thing off!!!!" I don't have one nor ever plan to on my car.

Mine came with my car whether I wanted it or not! Totally irritating - it mainly goes off when my son pushes the bright red PANIC button on my car keys! :crazy:

 

[southcitymom]

I don't think any of us could really answer the questions of "how to" install one. I think if we caused enough fuss maybe one of the manufacturers would jump on it.

Well, they've developed a carseat that can actually tell when a driver is getting sleepy and then sound an alarm, so surely they can make one that knows a child's still in a car seat!

http://www.pinktentacle.com/tag/safety

 

[southcitymom]

Here's exactly the child safety sensor carseat we're talking about, developed by NASA and announced in 2002 - wonder why it's never gone anywhere:

http://www.nasa.gov/centers/langley/news/releases/2002/02-008.html

Article also talks about a nonprofit children's safety group called Kids and Cars and here's an article from their old website: http://www.kidsandcars.org/incidents/heat/Alarms_aim_Sun_Sentinel.htm

 

[Beyond Belief]

I have decided to email car manufacturers. i sent this to ford.
Help!
Again today on the news a sleeping child was left in a car all day, forgotten. As an automobile manufacturer is there any type of alarm that could be attached to the carseat to remind the parent the child is still in the car?

 

[southcitymom]

I have decided to email car manufacturers. i sent this to ford.
Help!
Again today on the news a sleeping child was left in a car all day, forgotten. As an automobile manufacturer is there any type of alarm that could be attached to the carseat to remind the parent the child is still in the car?

Good idea.

Also, check out www.kidsandcars.org

They look to be organized and have a focus on this type of accident. Right now they seem to be lobbying heavily behind the rear-safety vehicle issue (to cut down on kids being killed in driveways, etc..) but this issue of children being left in carseats is on their radar and has been for a while.

It seems that good could also be done joining forces with their already established campaign. I am going to email them and try to find out more and what we could do.

 

[Beyond Belief]

thats an interesting site.

 

[southcitymom]

thats an interesting site.

It's good to know about, I think. They are organized and way ahead of the game in terms of getting something like this legislated. Sounds like they have an ear in Congress. It's great to think about a day when seats of this sort would be standard in all vehicles. I'm sure it would save lives.

 

[Beyond Belief]

government help is always good, but I have always believed if a manufacturer can see $$ coming their way, they'll do something about it.