Found Deceased UK - Nicola Bulley Last Seen Walking Dog Near River - St Michaels on Wyre (Lancashire) #13

[pineapple23]

Jeremy Kyle TalkTV on Nicola Bulley NOW. He has had PF and others on. Recommend watching the whole thing if you can.

 

[EvaP]

How so? NB was considered to be in a vulnerable, fragile state and had gone missing near a river. So the first thing you do is search the water (there could have been an accident not necessarily deliberate), not the local area

I’m guessing it’s also a cry for help from the public as she could be anywhere close and until she’s stumbled across…

 

[Lucy6226]

I'm sorry if this has already been mentioned but I haven't had time to read through the other 12 threads, only a few of them. When I looked on google maps at the area, there's a small building by the river on the same side as the bench that looks to be boarded up. It also looks like it goes underground too. I expect the searches and police have searched it?

Yeah it's already been searched and found empty. It looks like a pumping station IMO. Police have released details of their searches on the Lancashire Police Website for reference

 

[EvaP]

Jeremy Kyle TalkTV on Nicola Bulley NOW. He has had PF and others on. Recommend watching the whole thing if you can.

Watched it although slightly annoyed at PF again. Why would the police disclose personal information

 

[lvbut]

Awful. Maybe the DM pic should not be repeated here out of respect?

Good point.

 

[mrjitty]

All those attacks on police look pretty stupid now.

 

[pineapple23]

I'm sorry if this has already been mentioned but I haven't had time to read through the other 12 threads, only a few of them. When I looked on google maps at the area, there's a small building by the river on the same side as the bench that looks to be boarded up. It also looks like it goes underground too. I expect the searches and police have searched it?

Well spotted but yes

 

[Mo100]

That is shameful, isn't it? ( including photos of NB with drinks )

That Daily Mail front page is horrible. Nobody should underestimate what the menopause does to some of us.

 

[Agatha3]

here you go -

https://twitter.com/x/status/1625920200116736002

Hmmm. How would that change the search strategy? Still looking for a missing person.

 

[Mollie123]

Depression normally knocks you out, have no interest in anything, and you don't want get out of bed, anxiety on the other hand does the opposite, and yes I know because I've had both

With every respect, depression affects people differently. High functioning depression is very different from what you have described. JMO

 

[ginnyw]

https://twitter.com/x/status/1625936658624352264

Ergh the daily Mail is proper scum isn’t it? How long did it take them to find that picture.

It worries me where they got that photo from. It's a 'new' one, ie not one we've all seen from NB's social media. Somebody who knows the family must have given them that IMO. Awful.

 

[ginnyw]

With every respect, depression affects people differently. High functioning depression is very different from what you have described. JMO

Also there are 'smiling depressives' too. In my own family. Plus I am one, in fact.

 

[Dan Cooper]

It worries me where they got that photo from. It's a 'new' one, ie not one we've all seen from NB's social media. Somebody who knows the family must have given them that IMO. Awful.

Either a family member's FB page, or they bunged a few hundred quid to a friend of NB's.

 

[citygirl]

Maybe she was drunk and threatened or assaulted PA but he didn't want to press charges?

Hadn't considered that.
What a tragedy.

 

[Mo100]

Or vice versa.
Low oestrogen with menopause leads to reduced libido and a lot of (less confident) men feeling neglected, or worse annoyed,l. In my case my ex became paranoid that because I was not sleeping with him, I must be sleeping with someone else, paranoia spirals, general moodiness & aggression, tried to destroy my self esteem and I was somewhat trapped financially & with kids but luckily had family help & got out. Glad to be out because it was getting close to physical violence.

You are right. It can also cause paranoia in the woman, severe anxiety etc and thinking her partner is cheating. I was going through all this until I got HRT.

 

[cottonweaver]

PF searched upstream and down past the weir, perhaps he would have focused more on further downstream had he known but he said the police were extensively searching it themselves. Respect his efforts but not sure why he feels the need to give running commentary on this case now

Plus he was operating on LP's direction, not on his own lead. He did say that himself too.
They tasked him to do certain areas based on what they had already searched, ones they wanted him to re-do and new stretches. ( He was never in a position to determine his own search areas. )

 

[dotr]

Nicola Bulley: Mother a high-risk missing person, police say

Detectives say the mother's disappearance was graded as high risk due to "specific vulnerabilities".

www.bbc.com

'Nicola Bulley was considered a high-risk missing person from the start of the investigation into her disappearance, police have said.
The 45-year-old went missing on 27 January during a riverside dog walk in St Michael's on Wyre in Lancashire.
Det Supt Rebecca Smith said she was listed as high risk because of a "number of specific vulnerabilities".
But she added this was "normal in a missing person investigation with the information we were in possession of".
According to the College of Policing, the category is applied when the risk of a person coming to serious harm is assessed as very likely.'

 

[Agatha3]

Hello everyone, this is my first post here. I've been reading the threads since day one, but have felt compelled to register and contribute based on the recently released information. I've found myself feeling desperately sad to find out Nicola struggled with alcohol. As an alcoholic myself (currently doing yet another reduction plan, after nearly two decades of struggling) I know how utterly hellish and desperate addiction can be. My heart breaks for her, and I can understand the police not wanting to divulge that information due to the hurtful and judgemental stereotypes some people have of those of us who struggle with it.

A few things which MOO are worth considering. Suddenly completely stopping (or even significantly reducing) alcohol consumption can lead someone who is physically dependent on it (not that I'm saying Nicola was, as we simply don't know) to experience DTs (delerium tremors) which can present as auditory/visual hallucinations, confusion etc. In extreme cases, it can also bring about sudden seizures. Which would obviously be even more dangerous if one occurred near water. Again, just from my own personal experiences and IMO. I'm not in any way saying that was the case here, but I'm assuming the police would have looked into that possibility.

Also, someone's tolerance level, if they have a previous history of alcohol issues, can increase very rapidly if they begin using alcohol again. It's a process called 'kindling.' Again, I know from my own personal experience how quickly tolerance can go up and how someone can still appear perfectly lucid, coherent and without any impaired motor functions even after a huge dose of alcohol. Again, IMO MOO, but another thing worth considering in terms of people speculating whether someone would have the capacity to drive, whether it would be obvious to those around them if someone had been drinking etc.

The press release states Nicola had begun struggling again recently. And again, from my personal experience, this is a hugely devastating blow psychologically to someone who struggles with alcohol issues. We work so hard to get them under control, can become sober for lengths of time, and then relapse despite constantly fighting every single second not to. There's such a huge amount of shame, guilt and hopelessness which goes along with that. Sometimes those feelings are so extreme, you believe the only way to finally be free of it is to remove yourself from the world and to end both your own suffering and the suffering of those who love you. Again, I'm not saying this is the case here, but it's definitely something which is a possibility. And one which breaks my heart for Nicola.

I hope so much that people are kind after this infomation has been released. Nobody knows the absolute hell of addiction unless they have been there themself, and I hope people don't judge Nicola for it, or make assumptions about the type of person she was. We are more than just our addiction, and we fight so hard to overcome it. Some of us simply don't make it, whether that's due to an accident whilst impaired, or actively by our own hand when the suffering becomes too much to bear.

Apologies for the lengthy post. Thank you for taking the time to read it. Wishing you all a peaceful evening, my friends.

Such a moving post. X

 

[DetectiBamby]

As I've said my sister turned to alcohol due to postnatal depression that wasn't dealt with. She used drink to self medicate. Alcoholics hide drink and can appear sober cos their bodies get used to high intakes. My sister got very aggressive with my brother in law and he hid it for a long time but Police were called on several occasions. A lot of people mentioned that when PA was interviewed on Channel 5 it looked like he had a mark under his eye.. What I do find strange is that PA said the house was very organised on the morning she disappeared, which (from my experience with my sister who wouldn't cope with normal household chores if intoxicated) says to me NB was having a good day. I'm also somewhat surprised that PA would have let her drive with the children if he thought she wasn't fit to drive. I know my brother in law started to take the children to school because he didn't trust my sister to do it and in fairness she wouldn't have driven anyway, the kids were her life, which appears to be the case with NB. So I suppose I find it puzzling still how this would have affected her near the river. She was obviously sober enough to text her friend about a play date etc and to sign into a teams meeting. I still somehow can't see her being in the water but JMO.

I feel so sad to hear this information. The poor girls . Sorry about your Sis too. Some people high functioning , appearing fine to the rest of the world, keeping up with the housework, managing to have a career and being on the PTA. She may have been battling silently on , smiling but inside in utter turmoil. That's the thing with mental health, you never can tell. You could have the perfect life on the outside. I sailed through my pregnancies as a teenager, but when a lot older I had another child it wiped the floor with me mentally

Her parents are from a different generation where admitting a daughter is an alcoholic would feel shameful. We are more open in today's society about MH, drug addiction etc but there is still a massive stigma attached to these conditions. It is possible to still be a great mother to childre, a great friend, person and still be an alcoholic, it doesn't fully define the person you are. Unfortunately when people self medicate with alcohol to cope with depression it makes the depression worse because a lot of people will do and say things, become aggressive when under the influence and then feel ten times worse the next day with the guilt and shame and then will have another drink to blot it out and it soon becomes a never ending circle of destruction. I know my mum, being from a different generation wouldn't have wanted the world to know about my sister, so they have probably held off making it public for her parents sake.

I'm sorry about your Sister and I am am

It's a funny one, many women struggle with the menopause, many don't. And I'm sure we've all had a few drinks too many, and had phases in life where we drink too often, being in lockdown and the way life has changed for many people over the last couple of years. But NB, didn't give up on life as such, continued to work, got up in the mornings, took the kids to school, and the dog for a walk, which indicates she wasn't suffering depression, if you know you know what I mean. I think they have had to come out with this info, as the indication of vulnerability had come out, and I get why they said it after the presser, so then no questions could be asked.

It almost makes it worse that she seemed to have it all together. She seemed high functioning on the outside. Good job, member of the PTA, great Mother , friends & loving family. You can never guess how tortured someone may have been, as is so often the case with mental health.

 

[ginnyw]

45 is early for menopause issues, although not for peri-menopause. I lost 5 years of sleep during mine and was pretty close to ending it all at times. Poor NB. And poor PA too.