Willow and Bristol Palin post slurs and profanity on FB

[Kimberlyd125]

IMO being called fat or being slurred in any way, does not give you the right to one up and sling a slur back. They ALL behaved badly.

and that is sad to me.

I agree, but teens are not like you and me. When they feel insulted, they often fire back.

I think WP thought she was taking up for her Mother and Sister.

She used the wrong words.

 

[WhyaDuck?]

I teach at the undergraduate level and many of my students are about 17. I find the suggestion that they are completely helpless slaves to their impulses rather insulting to young people, as many of them are blossoming and decent people.

At 16, someone can drive. At 18, 19, 21, they can vote and drink and go to war and get married and become parents... At what age are people expected to have a modicum of empathy and civility? If we lower the bar of expectations for increasingly high ages, what will we be left with? 30 year olds who don't know how to control themselves?

At 16 I knew perfectly well what an insult was, and I tried to conduct myself politely. Certainly by BP's age, I even further ahead on that.

I just don't get infantilizing young people instead of giving them enough respect to believe they can rise to high standards.

 

[Kimberlyd125]

I teach at the undergraduate level and many of my students are about 17. I find the suggestion that they are completely helpless slaves to their impulses rather insulting to young people, as many of them are blossoming and decent people.

At 16, someone can drive. At 18, 19, 21, they can vote and drink and go to war and get married and become parents... At what age are people expected to have a modicum of empathy and civility? If we lower the bar of expectations for increasingly high ages, what will we be left with? 30 year olds who don't know how to control themselves?

At 16 I knew perfectly well what an insult was, and I tried to conduct myself politely. Certainly by BP's age, I even further ahead on that.

I just don't get infantilizing young people instead of giving them enough respect to believe they can rise to high standards.

So, the professors of psychology are wrong?

 

[animlzrule]

I am worried about the internet and the web causing more problems for young people. It is almost like if a young person makes a mistake that is no longer handled by the parents without it becoming something that the world could know about. I remember running away from home (didn't get very far), making mistakes and being corrected by my parents. Now with Facebook, Myspace and the internet, it can become known to the world and if the child wasn't embarrassed enough by having being corrected by their parents, to have the world judging a lapse in judgment is really tough. I hope when I make my mistakes in life, which will continue, that it is not photographed, recorded or broadcast to the world...my mistakes are between me, who I made the mistake with or to, and God.

This is very true in today's times. That's why it's critical that parents are vigilant about what their kids are doing and how they are conducting themselves. Additionally, why parents need to make how we treat one another a very serious matter for discussion from a very early age. Parents aren't clued in nearly enough to the daily goings on of kids lives any more because technology is obscuring the traditional routes of communication and controls. So, it's the parents responsibility to take control back. Kids SHOULD NOT BE ON FACEBOOK if they can't be responsible with it. And surely, no kid should be able to set their status to private. There are very few private mistakes to be made in life anymore if you don't think before you act. These kids are old enough to be very aware of that.

 

[jandkmom]

I teach at the undergraduate level and many of my students are about 17. I find the suggestion that they are completely helpless slaves to their impulses rather insulting to young people, as many of them are blossoming and decent people.

At 16, someone can drive. At 18, 19, 21, they can vote and drink and go to war and get married and become parents... At what age are people expected to have a modicum of empathy and civility? If we lower the bar of expectations for increasingly high ages, what will we be left with? 30 year olds who don't know how to control themselves?

At 16 I knew perfectly well what an insult was, and I tried to conduct myself politely. Certainly by BP's age, I even further ahead on that.

I just don't get infantilizing young people instead of giving them enough respect to believe they can rise to high standards.

I don't believe we should lower the bar, just that it shouldn't become a lesson in front of the nation, but at home. Being reprimanded by your parents is tough...being reprimanded by the nation is awful.

 

[Dark Knight]

what's the old adage about a tree falling and no one around to hear it?
If no one read it would it not be bad? of course it would and hopefully she is being corrected. This to me isn't about this child as much as it represents the desensitzation and excuses for the poor behavior of our youth today. no more no less.
If it raises awareness and stmulates conversation at a couple dinner tables to night,then it can be a good thing.
Famous kids really do have this burden to carry and it is unfair,but such is the life in the limelight.

Oh trust me, I see this sort of back and forth all the time on Facebook among teens and even people in their early 20's, so this is nothing new. But they are public figures, so it gets attention, and having such a conservative mother adds to the interest in the kid's wild behavior, I think.

 

[WhyaDuck?]

So, the professors of psychology are wrong?

There are likely just as many psychologists who claim people at this age are responsible for their behaviour, otherwise people wouldn't be tried as adults under any circumstances until they are 20 or above.

 

[tlcya]

I agree, but teens are not like you and me. When they feel insulted, they often fire back.

I think WP thought she was taking up for her Mother and Sister.

She used the wrong words.

the youngest young lady is 16. Her sister is what? 18? Both of these girls are way past the age when they should have learned and understand the truth of that old schoolyard saying

sticks and stones (tired =typos abound)

Again, just me but they behaved badly, their mom I am sure is handling it. The sad fact is, the other teens, who don't live in teh public eye? Their parents probably have no idea what their kids were posting and still don't as their kids aren't in the public eye.

I find this also very sad.

 

[daisy7]

I am well aware of the stuff the goes on on FB with teens.

I am slowly considering allowing my oldest son to have his own FB page. If I do allow him to do this, I will check it frequently and if he posted anything like this carp, his FB page would be gone and he'd be facing some serious restriction time.

Yeah, their Mom being who she is makes these posts even worse and more public, but I would be outraged to read posts like this from any teen. I'm not sure why anyone would try and justify the derogatory terms they posted on FB. It doesn't matter to me if these are slang words used by teens. They are still wrong!

I really have to wonder why their parents were not checking their posts and moderating them (especially for W), if needed.

 

[tlcya]

I am betting this sort of thing won't be unmonitored any longer (for W) Eph.

 

[Kimberlyd125]

Info from Harvard Medical School Study

http://harvardmagazine.com/2008/09/the-teen-brain.html

Research during the past 10 years, powered by technology such as functional magnetic resonance imaging, has revealed that young brains have both fast-growing synapses and sections that remain unconnected. This leaves teens easily influenced by their environment and more prone to impulsive behavior, even without the impact of souped-up hormones and any genetic or family predispositions.
***Much more at link

 

[WhyaDuck?]

Being influenced by is not the same thing as being unable to control oneself, I think.

 

[Kimberlyd125]

the youngest young lady is 16. Her sister is what? 18? Both of these girls are way past the age when they should have learned and understand the truth of that old schoolyard saying

sticks and stones (tired =typos abound)

Again, just me but they behaved badly, their mom I am sure is handling it. The sad fact is, the other teens, who don't live in teh public eye? Their parents probably have no idea what their kids were posting and still don't as their kids aren't in the public eye.

I find this also very sad.

BBM - Not according to many medical studies.

http://www.ehow.com/about_6639037_moral-development-adolescents.html

Adolescents are in a kind of limbo between childhood and adulthood. In 2005, Dr. Ruben Gur, professor of psychology at the University of Pennsylvania, wrote: "The evidence now is strong that the brain does not cease to mature until the early 20s." Adolescents are still in the process of gaining control over cognitive processes that shape any reasonable definition of morality, including "impulsivity, judgment, planning for the future [and] foresight of consequences." Adolescent moral development is not only a concern for parents and educators, but for the criminal justice system, scientists and therapists.
.

Info from Harvard Medical School Study

http://harvardmagazine.com/2008/09/the-teen-brain.html

Research during the past 10 years, powered by technology such as functional magnetic resonance imaging, has revealed that young brains have both fast-growing synapses and sections that remain unconnected. This leaves teens easily influenced by their environment and more prone to impulsive behavior, even without the impact of souped-up hormones and any genetic or family predispositions.
***Much more at link

 

[jandkmom]

Both of my children, 19 and 21, have Facebooks and I am their friend. When they post something that I deem inappropriate I call them on it. I have raised them knowing right from wrong, but wrong shouldn't mean forever. It's wrong and then it's done. Are y'all saying after 18 if you make a mistake that other people should judge you on it? When and if I go to heaven I hope that I am judged by God's grace and not by my mistakes.

 

[Kimberlyd125]

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=124119468

Teenage Brains Are Different

She learned that that it's not so much what teens are thinking — it's how.

Jensen says scientists used to think human brain development was pretty complete by age 10. Or as she puts it, that "a teenage brain is just an adult brain with fewer miles on it."

But it's not. To begin with, she says, a crucial part of the brain — the frontal lobes — are not fully connected. Really.

"It's the part of the brain that says: 'Is this a good idea? What is the consequence of this action?' " Jensen says. "It's not that they don't have a frontal lobe. And they can use it. But they're going to access it more slowly."

That's because the nerve cells that connect teenagers' frontal lobes with the rest of their brains are sluggish. Teenagers don't have as much of the fatty coating called myelin, or "white matter," that adults have in this area.

 

[tlcya]

GO back to when you were 16 years old. Imagine you have done something immature, socially unacceptable, and cursed, all in a very public way. Would your mother or father or role model say,

"Well, [insert you here] IS just a kid and her connections haven't fully formed so she shouldn't be taken to task."

???

Cause that is NOT how my folks handled that sort of thing.

 

[Kimberlyd125]

From Discovery Health

http://health.howstuffworks.com/human-body/systems/nervous-system/teenage-brain1.htm

Teenage Brain Development

Wondering what happened to your little princess? Blame it on the brain.In adults, various parts of the brain work together to evaluate choices, make decisions and act accordingly in each situation. The teenage brain doesn't appear to work like this.

As such, the prefrontal cortex is a little immature in teenagers as compared to adults; it may not fully develop until your mid-20s.

So what does it mean to have an undeveloped prefrontal cortex in conjunction with a strong desire for reward? As it happens, this combination could explain a lot of stereotypical teenage behavior.

 

[WhyaDuck?]

It seems to me that it is perfectly reasonable to agree that teens are still young adults and are on the road to full maturity - however, I see no way for them to develop that maturity without reasonable expectations and consequences. And I don't feel it is a great injustice to anyone over the age of 10 to expect them to know what an insult is.

None of us are suggesting these kids get the death penalty. Most of us are discussing if this was a problematic use of these terms, and I believe they were.

My opinion, which I have the right to - just the same as everyone here, no matter who may shout the loudest.

 

[Kimberlyd125]

GO back to when you were 16 years old. Imagine you have done something immature, socially unacceptable, and cursed in a very public way. Would your mother or father or role model say,

"Well, [insert you here] IS just a kid and her connections haven't fully formed so she shouldn't be taken to task."

?

I didn't do the studies, I just linked them. I don't really care what people say about teen brains except the experts.

My child's softball coach told me something one time about the prefrontal cortex and I have to admit, I was like HUH???? We were talking about some drama going on with the schools softball team. Now these are 13-14 year olds and I was appauled at some of the things that were being said.
Well, this coach majored in :crazy: what ever you major in to know about the prefrontal cortex :smile: and told me it is perfectly normal for teens to act that way.

I mean all you can do is tell them they screwed up. You can't burn them at the stake. And they will MOST LIKELY mess up again. It's the nature of the "teenage" beast.

 

[Dark Knight]

the youngest young lady is 16. Her sister is what? 18? Both of these girls are way past the age when they should have learned and understand the truth of that old schoolyard saying

sticks and stones (tired =typos abound)

Again, just me but they behaved badly, their mom I am sure is handling it. The sad fact is, the other teens, who don't live in teh public eye? Their parents probably have no idea what their kids were posting and still don't as their kids aren't in the public eye.

I find this also very sad.

I am well aware of the stuff the goes on on FB with teens.

I am slowly considering allowing my oldest son to have his own FB page. If I do allow him to do this, I will check it frequently and if he posted anything like this carp, his FB page would be gone and he'd be facing some serious restriction time.

Yeah, their Mom being who she is makes these posts even worse and more public, but I would be outraged to read posts like this from any teen. I'm not sure why anyone would try and justify the derogatory terms they posted on FB. It doesn't matter to me if these are slang words used by teens. They are still wrong!

I really have to wonder why their parents were not checking their posts and moderating them (especially for W), if needed.

Parents are woefully out of touch with how their teens act and talk to each other. They way your kid talks on FB is the way they talk in real life. Maybe worse in real life, actually. It's not a worse "offense" because it's on FB except a larger audience might read it, depending on their privacy settings. How they talk is how they talk, regardless of the forum.

So many parents think their kids don't act or talk a certain way, and glare at someone who swears in front of their child, when in reality that child has heard FAR worse at school, already, and PROBABLY says it. But they have certainly heard it all, before. And at a fairly young age compared to you.

I've got news for the parents of the world, your child is not usually the angel they pretend to be when you are around, lol. And if they don't act like an angel when you're around, they are 10x worse when you aren't. Kids are exposed to this stuff all the time, you cannot shelter them from it, you can only hope to give them good judgment skills to deal with it.