You Can't Make This Up - No Discussion

[sds71]

Police near Atlanta kindly asked parents on Wednesday to double-check lunches they pack for their children, after one tyke came to school with a martini to wash down a midday snack.

The South Fulton Police Department released a picture of what, at a quick glance, looked like a normal school lunch.

But on closer examination the aluminum can wasn't juice, soda or any other non-intoxicating beverage. It was a can of lemon martini made with "vodka, triple sec and lemon juice," according to its label.

“That is NOT Capri Sun. That is NOT Apple Juice,” according to a police department statement about the youngster's one-martini lunch. “That is a whole ‘Parent had a long night’ starter pack.”

"Check the lunchbox before the Fulton County Schools Policeresource officers gotta do inventory at recess," South Fulton police added.

Martini in student's lunchbox prompts Georgia police to warn parents: 'That is NOT Apple Juice'

“That is a whole ‘Parent had a long night’ starter pack,” read the tongue-in-cheek warning from local PD along with a picture of the canned martini that was packed in a child's lunch.

www.nbcnews.com

 

[arielilane]

The owners of the restaurant told KSL they’re relieved their customers and employees are OK and hoped to reopen as soon as Thursday.

Elderly woman arrested after crashing into Utah restaurant - East Idaho News

SANDY, Utah (KSL) — Diners at Los Garcia, a well-loved Mexican food restaurant in Sandy, Utah, were settling in for lunch Wednesday when a white SUV barreled through the front of the building. Surveillance cameras captured the moment the vehicle plowed into the front dining area, sending glass...

www.eastidahonews.com

 

[ginestra]

Cutwater is really strong! I can't imagine if a kid drank that

 

[sds71]

Wallis is accused of committing 75 thefts at multiple Target locations across Florida between July 2025 and February 2026, Uthmeier's office said. Investigators believe that in each theft, Wallis would grab large boxes of trading cards and an equal number of 99-cent taco seasoning packets.

Then, once at the self-checkout line, Wallis is alleged to have only paid for the seasoning packets. Authorities said that Wallis would resell the stolen trading cards on eBay, generating almost $40,000 in revenue.

The investigation is ongoing; authorities suspect Wallis committed additional thefts at Walmart and Publix locations in Florida.

“This arrest sends a clear message that organized retail theft, no matter how coordinated or far-reaching, will be aggressively investigated and prosecuted,” Palm Beach County Sheriff Ric Bradshaw said in a statement.

Wallis faces up to 90 years in prison if convicted on all counts. As of Feb. 27, online court records do not show a defense attorney listed for him.

https://www.palmbeachpost.com/story/news/crime/2026/03/01/florida-man-target-taco-seasoning-trading-cards/88931856007/

 

[arielilane]

'I was just somebody who loved to run': 100-mile world-record breaker shares her story - East Idaho News

ST. GEORGE — Ashley Paulson has made headlines for the past decade, from running 9 miles to the hospital to give birth to her fourth child, to winning big at the Deseret News Marathon, to starring in a reality TV endurance challenge. Her most recent accomplishment had her breaking a world record...

www.eastidahonews.com