Connecticut school district on lockdown after shooting report at a Newtown elemen #11

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I'm not sure if I'm posting in the right place for Adam but this is pretty informative and heart breaking at the same time, especially parents that have a special needs child. My apolgies if it's a repeat but it's dated 3/17/14? I pray for them all.

Annoying little side pop up that wants you to buy the New Yorker, I x'd it out, but it's Adam's dad giving some insight to what he knows with a reporter writing it up an adding to it. It's the New Yorker.

Annals of Psychology

The Reckoning

The father of the Sandy Hook killer searches for answers.


by Andrew Solomon


In Peter Lanza’s new house, on a secluded private road in Fairfield County, Connecticut, is an attic room overflowing with shipping crates of what he calls “the stuff.” Since the day in December, 2012, when his son Adam killed his own mother, himself, and twenty-six people at Sandy Hook Elementary School, strangers from across the world have sent thousands upon thousands of letters and other keepsakes: prayer shawls, Bibles, Teddy bears, homemade toys; stories with titles such as “My First Christmas in Heaven”; crosses, including one made by prison inmates. People sent candy, too, and when I visited Peter, last fall, he showed me a bag of year-old caramels. He had not wanted to throw away anything that people sent. But he said, “I was wary about eating anything,” and he didn’t let Shelley Lanza—his second wife—eat any of the candy, either. There was no way to be sure it wasn’t poisoned. Downstairs, in Peter’s home office, I spotted a box of family photographs. He used to display them, he told me, but now he couldn’t look at Adam, and it seemed strange to put up photos of his older son, Ryan, without Adam’s. “I’m not dealing with it,” he said. Later, he added, “You can’t mourn for the little boy he once was. You can’t fool yourself.”

Way more at link (8 pages but full page is an option)

http://www.newyorker.com/reporting/...social&utm_medium=twitter&mbid=social_twitter
 
Adam Lanza's father in 1st interview: He would have killed me 'in a heartbeat'

By Ralph Ellis, CNN

updated 7:54 AM EDT, Mon March 10, 2014

(CNN) -- The father of Sandy Hook Elementary School shooter Adam Lanza said his son would have killed him if he'd had the opportunity.

"With hindsight, I know Adam would have killed me in a heartbeat, if he'd had the chance," Peter Lanza told New Yorker magazine in an interview that appears in the March 17 issue.

It's the first time Peter Lanza has spoken publicly about his son...

http://www.cnn.com/2014/03/10/us/adam-lanzas-father-speaks/index.html?hpt=hp_t2
 
FASCINATING article and I'm glad dad has spoken out. He's very clear that there was a serious mental health problem, his passive parenting and NL's obsessive observation of, catering to and covering for AL, and that neither could see past the "autism" he had been diagnosed with. Both parents seem to ascribe many of AL's behaviors to autism - but seem woefully uninformed about the disorder and NL, for all of her "observation" doesn't see how manipulative AL is to the point where he exhibited behavior that got him out of doing things he didn't want to do. Very manipulative. At the point AL cuts off all contact with his father, NL seems to have given up and joined the madness by developing an unimaginable level of denial.
 
Excellent article...

http://www.newyorker.com/reporting/...social&utm_medium=twitter&mbid=social_twitter

When Adam was fourteen, shortly after Ryan had left for college, Peter and Nancy took him to Yale’s Child Study Center for further diagnosis. The psychiatrist who assessed Adam, Robert King, recorded that he was a “pale, gaunt, awkward young adolescent standing rigidly with downcast gaze and declining to shake hands.”....King was concerned that Adam’s parents seemed to worry primarily about his schooling, and said that it was more urgent to address “how to accommodate Adam’s severe social disabilities in a way that would permit him to be around peers.” King saw “significant risk to Adam in creating, even with the best of intentions, a prosthetic environment which spares him having to encounter other students or to work to overcome his social difficulties.”
I think the article and perhaps Peter are too focused on whether or not Adam's violent behavior could have been predicted. It seems to me a major point is that the Lanza's focused entirely on Adam's intellectual being and even disregarded his social being after Dr. King pointed it out. Peter still seems to be looking for an organic cause (Schizophrenia - could well be), but does not see the loneliness/isolation, particularly as adolescence sets in, as a huge problem. Although he does portray through his experiences how Nancy's overindulgent tendencies may have aided in Adam's problmes.
Forensic records of Adam’s online activity show that, in his late teens, he developed a preoccupation with mass murder. But there was never a warning sign; his obsession was discussed only pseudonymously with others online.
There were warning signs of his violent obsessions consuming his entire life. Nancy needed some mental health counseling herself. It's heartbreaking that Nancy was not giving true accounts of what was going on with Adam.

The state’s attorney’s report says that when Nancy asked Adam whether he would feel sad if anything happened to her, he replied, “No.” A Word document called “Selfish,” which was found on Adam’s computer, gives an explanation of why females are inherently selfish, written while one of them was accommodating him in every possible way.
 
Very informative. My heart breaks for Peter Lanza and his family.
 
Very informative. My heart breaks for Peter Lanza and his family.


He's really put himself out there as far as taking responsibility for not being more forceful in trying to see Adam and even offering to meet with the families who lost their loved ones. He seems like a decent person and ultimately, NL was actively aiding Adam in not having to see his father and omitting or minimizing what was really going on, so there really was no way for Peter to know how bad the situation had gotten.
 
Very informative. My heart breaks for Peter Lanza and his family.

"Adam Lanza's dad wishes son had never been born, says you can't get any more evil."

Wow. The movie, The Bad Seed, comes to mind.


He did say that but for those who have not read it here is how he said it.
Peter declared that he wished Adam had never been born, that there could be no remembering who he was outside of who he became. “That didn’t come right away. That’s not a natural thing, when you’re thinking about your kid. But, God, there’s no question. There can only be one conclusion, when you finally get there. That’s fairly recent, too, but that’s totally where I am.”

Not in a mean spirited way, IMO if he was never born the 26 would never have died. Also seems Nancy was very manipulated and she also manipulated Peter because she was not truthful with him about their son and also she lied about her own relationship with Adam.She was bitter he remarried and instead of trying to get Peter back into their son's life she seems to have promoted the riff.She could have allowed Peter to come to their home and confront his son about cutting him out of his life but she just stuck to emails. I find only talking by emails strange when you have a special needs child. I feel so bad for him but he is right , IT can happen to any of us .
 
Read the article. IMO a royal crock. There's something WRONG here, VERY wrong, all the way around.
 
Wow...well no matter how much AL cried in the bathroom I still have 0 sympathy for him. He sounds like he was a nightmare to live with...I would have been terrified of him too, but enough is enough you know? there were so many missed opportunities to intensify or change treatment for him and yet he drifted away and further into his sick indulgences. I feel very very sorry for his father and the rest of the family...his father must be in a dark place every time he thinks of his son and that is tragic. I do believe that he "motive" or the idea that AL's "pain" being "profound" and wanting to transfer it to other people seems to fit.
 
The thing that most struck me from all the articles about the Lanza family, and in particular the relationship between Adam and his mom, was all the things that she was not "allowed" to do because it upset Adam. It sounds like he weilded an enormous amount of power over his mom from a very young age. Possibly he even hated her for that, because she was not strong enough to be strong for him. I understand he had issues but tend to think having someone set boundaries and tell him "no" once in a while would have been beneficial to him. I think possibly the dad just gave up because it was too hard to deal with Nancy and Adam both and their unwillingness to help themselves or allow him to be a real part of Adam's life. The amount of denial this mom was in is astounding. I can understand not expecting Adam to become violent but she had to have seen that he was disintegrating underneath whatever was wrong with him. Only communicating with her by email, having very long hysterical crying jags in the bathroom floor, etc. I can't help but think the ultimate outcome of this whole situation could have been prevented. He desperately needed medication for many many years before the day of the shootings. For most of those years he was a minor and it seems there should be a law or some way to enforce him taking his meds for his own safety.
 
The thing that most struck me from all the articles about the Lanza family, and in particular the relationship between Adam and his mom, was all the things that she was not "allowed" to do because it upset Adam. It sounds like he weilded an enormous amount of power over his mom from a very young age. Possibly he even hated her for that, because she was not strong enough to be strong for him. I understand he had issues but tend to think having someone set boundaries and tell him "no" once in a while would have been beneficial to him. I think possibly the dad just gave up because it was too hard to deal with Nancy and Adam both and their unwillingness to help themselves or allow him to be a real part of Adam's life. The amount of denial this mom was in is astounding. I can understand not expecting Adam to become violent but she had to have seen that he was disintegrating underneath whatever was wrong with him. Only communicating with her by email, having very long hysterical crying jags in the bathroom floor, etc. I can't help but think the ultimate outcome of this whole situation could have been prevented. He desperately needed medication for many many years before the day of the shootings. For most of those years he was a minor and it seems there should be a law or some way to enforce him taking his meds for his own safety.

I understand your feelings and believe many people share the same opinion. I admit, with the little I knew in the beginning, I had a bad taste in my mouth in regards to Nancy Lanza and held her partially responsible.

However, after reading this article and seeing much of her correspondence with her husband, I feel like it was much more of an inability to see the forest for the trees for Nancy Lanza. I came away with the fact that both of these parents loved and worked hard to be (what they believed) were good parents. While they may have focussed on the wrong things they did seek help, they did have him evaluated, and they did try treatment. Medication for the mentally ill is not a simple thing. Even those people who know and agree they need medication, and know that it helps can and do stop taking it. You cannot force someone to take medication- over the age of 18- but even when they are minors. Even if you could for a time, how long would that last and how much would that help in the end?

I appreciate the honesty of Peter Lanza... His reaching out to meet with the families of victims. His outright acknowledgement that he wanted to change his name but would't because he couldn't distance himself that way, from what had happened. The fact that he admits his son was evil- not always- but that he wished he'd never been born.

I hope the family can find peace... all of the families- he said he would die, in a heartbeat to take someones place. I believe him.

I feel much more sorry for Nancy now. While I believe she ended up failing her son on so many levels I do not think it was ever with malice or disregard- quite the opposite. She loved and tried to help her son and failed... failed horrendously and paid with her life.

It is a very good article. I am glad I read it.
 
Am I the only one that feels as time has gone on, this whole incident has had little to no press (after the immediate flurry of media when it first happened) in comparison to other shootings, like columbine or the James Holmes shooting? Usually you would have family friends, family and everyone and anyone willing to tell stories but everyone just seems to mute, it's odd.
 
I'm glad he said he thinks the Asperger's masked something else - I do too. That seems to the piece no one is examining - I don't believe in inherent "evil" because I'm not religious - but I do believe in people who are born or made sociopaths with violent desires, which is essentially the same thing. But nevertheless, something caused him to do this - whether biological, environmental, or likely a complex combination of both.

I'm haunted by how he looks similar to the Aurora shooter, who took similar actions and displayed similar symptoms. I do think the mental condition of these people needs more focus, instead of the focus on evil, Asperger's, and parents with guns. Something was particularly wrong with this kid - a huge amount of parents irresponsibly have guns around very troubled kids, but randomly targeting such young children is never the result. It's unusual even for a sociopath. Of course, had the guns not been available, this would not have happened, but you wonder what he would have eventually done via other methods.
 
The article reaffirms what I have suspected. Adam Lanza would of killed Peter and Ryan Lanza. He sees himself as normal despite having problems. He had poor relationship with his parents and brother. It mentioned that Lanza was easily frustrated and likely feared failure. He is extremely rigid and has black and white thinking, likely the most outside of any extremists like Osama bin Laden or Fred Phelps.

I noticed that both Adam Lanza and Seung-Hui Cho had health problems, especially with Cho when he was younger with the heart problem and being sick easily. Lanza had more problems that were psychological.

There are also instances where he liked being around people and talked, unlike Seung-Hui Cho, who was almost silent for most of his life. I have heard Cho and Lanza talked and they do not sound like they have any speech problems. Lanza sounds rather articulate.
 
Am I the only one that feels as time has gone on, this whole incident has had little to no press (after the immediate flurry of media when it first happened) in comparison to other shootings, like columbine or the James Holmes shooting? Usually you would have family friends, family and everyone and anyone willing to tell stories but everyone just seems to mute, it's odd.

Interesting you mention that. Since the Sandy Hook Massacre report was released, we are starting to hear more about Adam Lanza. There was not much immediately following the massacre. Also, interesting is that Peter Lanza came forward to be interviewed for New Yorker. The Harrises have never been interviewed, while the Klebolds had been. Columbine got a lot of media attention for a while. The Chos have never come forward since Virginia Tech Massacre.

On related topic, despite the heavy media attention for Casey Anthony, Jodi Arias, or Lori Drew we did not hear much from people who knew them.
 
Am I the only one that feels as time has gone on, this whole incident has had little to no press (after the immediate flurry of media when it first happened) in comparison to other shootings, like columbine or the James Holmes shooting? Usually you would have family friends, family and everyone and anyone willing to tell stories but everyone just seems to mute, it's odd.

I don't think the Aurora shooting got significantly more coverage than Newtown. But I kind of know what you're saying. Newtown was a huge story for 2-3 weeks. It was everywhere. Since then, if you had a Google News alert for it, you would probably get articles on a daily basis about it, but if you were just an average person, you would only hear about it every so often. For example, when I look for interviews with the parents, there are many avaliable, but I had to actually seek them out. I think it is hard for the media to continue giving it wall-to-wall coverage though.

I think that due to the number of victims, the amount of coverage we may think the story should have gotten is not realistic.
 
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