2010.06.28 - Kyron's Dad files for divorce and restraining order

[Jules71]

I disagree. They were married for three years, if that. Even here, in a community property state, she would likely not be entitled to support, or it would be a very small amount for a very short period of time. She's relatively young and has a degree (supposedly) and is totally capable of supporting herself. If KH gets fully custody of baby, on the other hand, he is entitled to child support. And with 100% custody it would likely be fairly substantial depending on TH's projected earning capacity. Plus, it's probably determined by a straight calculation that doesn't take any other factors into consideration. Best case scenario for TH is she gets a tiny bit of support and pays no child support for now b/c she is currently and historically unemployed.

And OT -- I totally can't stand the entitlement mentality that a woman can continue to leach off her ex indefinitely, regardless of the circumstances. It's one thing to have been in a long-term marriage, raised the children as a sahm by mutual agreement and supported your husband's career (in any number of ways) and after many years he trades you in for a younger model or just decides he doesn't want to be married anymore, leaving you essentially unemployable and incapable of supporting yourself and/or the children. That situation is what alimony and child support were intended to address. (And in case your wondering, that didn't happen to me so I'm not speaking from bitterness lol) This situation is quite another -- regardless of whether you think TH is guilty or not. Imo, no-fault divorce is the worst concept ever. jmho

Just bouncing off of your post.... She might not be entitled to spousal 'support' - but she should be entitled to any joint finances they had. I don't think he can just cut her off because he is the one with the paycheck!

 

[Aedrys]

Crime pays. I believe this is what Casey Anthony has learned and so has any others potential criminals that watche the media. We turn them into reality tv stars. very disturbing.

Well, it hasn't paid as well for Casey. She's indigent now and people are leaving her dream team left and right. That's what happens when the money runs out. In her case, crime ultimately didn't pay.

 

[tlcya]

I am not sure why everyone is all het up about her requesting money. Until she is charged, or appears before family court to hash out the divorce agreement, she is indigent.

If we factor out the disappearance of Kyrona nd look at this from the married couple seperating in preparation for divorce, it is perfectly normal for there to be a temporary financial arrangement so that the two parties can go about setting up two seperate households.

Terri is a housewife, Kaine is the breadwinner. Custodial parent usually gets the family home for the benefit of the child(ren) and certain financial decisions are made to begin the seperation of the couple's money and assets.

With Kaine being the breadwinner of the family I would have been shocked if Terri's attorney HADN'T asked for access to some of the COUPLE's money on her behalf. What else should she do? Go live in a van, down by the river? He wants her out of the family home, until she is proven guilty of something, she has every right to ask for a reasonable sum to mobilize and make that so.

 

[wondering1]

Just bouncing off of your post.... She might not be entitled to spousal 'support' - but she should be entitled to any joint finances they had. I don't think he can just cut her off because he is the one with the paycheck!

Yes, I believe that to be true. As I understand it from reading here, Oregon is an equitable distribution state. So she'll be entitled to whatever distribution of joint marital assets the court determines to be equitable -- which means the court can pretty much do anything it wants to. Whenever equity is involved, the court has a lot of discretion.

 

[wondering1]

I am not sure why everyone is all het up about her requesting money. Until she is charged, or appears before family court to hash out the divorce agreement, she is indigent.

I would guess some are all het up because they believe she is guilty. For me, I'm trying to imagine myself in KH's shoes. He truly believes that this woman disappeared Kyron, tried to have him killed, too, is carrying on some kind of bizarre affair with HIS hs buddy and is a cold as ice about all of it. Try to imagine if THAT person, the one he believes TH to be, fought you in court for more of your hard-earned money after you've already been supporting the monster (from his perspective) for years -- buying her a nice car, a pricy destination wedding and who knows what else. Imagine you're KH writing her that check, as opposed to ripping her face off -- which is probably what he'd love to do. jmoo

 

[tlcya]

I would guess some are all het up because they believe she is guilty. For me, I'm trying to imagine myself in KH's shoes. He truly believes that this woman disappeared Kyron, tried to have him killed, too, is carrying on some kind of bizarre affair with HIS hs buddy and is a cold as ice about all of it. Try to imagine if THAT person, the one he believes TH to be, fought you in court for more of your hard-earned money after you've already been supporting the monster (from his perspective) for years -- buying her a nice car, a pricy destination wedding and who knows what else. Imagine you're KH writing her that check, as opposed to ripping her face off -- which is probably what he'd love to do. jmoo

I am betting KH has a lot more on his mind than having to write a check to oust Terri from the family home. I am betting he is a little too busy to be consumed with bitterness. That will come later. Right now he is probably more concerned with finding his son, and trying to help baby K adjust to life without mommy involved. Were I in his shoes, my priority would be getting those things accomplished and if that meant throwing Terri a little money to facilitate her getting out so I could get on with it, so be it. Time enough to be angry, bitter and mourn the loss of my money later. That's just me.

 

[wvjules]

Until she gets her *advertiser censored* into the police station and finishes cooperating and talking TRUTHFULLY about her day when Kyron went missing, then to me she is disgusting. And her sexting and causing all kind of drama with Kaine's friend and violating the RO, does make her a self absorbed drama queen imo. Others are crying over the disappearance of Kyron, worried sick, trying to find means to keep paying searchers etc. And this is what she's doing? I never said she was a murderer, but I definitely would keep a 100 yards away from her if I knew her in real life, because she seems toxic.

Sorry it's a strong word, but she IS the focus of the investigation, and has the answers according to Kaine and Desiree, and they are given information by LE.

I must be missing where anyone OTHER than KH, DY and TY have said that TH is not cooperating? Pleae point me in the right direction.

Also, I would like to be pointed to where it was stated that TH took baby K to a babysitter on June 4.

TIA!

 

[cmsg2002]

This is Kaine's home. He bought it before the marriage, and it has remained in his name only. Most "marital homes" were bought jointly by the already or about-to-be married couple. In some cases, the home was already owned by one of the parties prior to the marriage, and the other party is added to the deed at the time of the marriage. Otherwise, it's not joint property. We can only wonder why Kaine chose not to add her to the deed, but he didn't, and so it's his home and his only.

The home may have been Kaine's prior to the marriage, and TH's name may not be on the deed, but that does not mean she is not entitled to any of its value. As OR is an equitable distribution state, as is RI, she is entitled to receive a portion of any appreciation in value during the marriage. As marital monies were used to pay expenses associated with the house, and even if KH were the only wage-earner, those monies are still considered marital...and she is entitled to a portion of those.

 

[SacreBleu]

The home may have been Kaine's prior to the marriage, and TH's name may not be on the deed, but that does not mean she is not entitled to any of its value. As OR is an equitable distribution state, as is RI, she is entitled to receive a portion of any appreciation in value during the marriage. As marital monies were used to pay expenses associated with the house, and even if KH were the only wage-earner, those monies are still considered marital...and she is entitled to a portion of those.

Is she also entitled to pay a portion of the loss of value of the home? If Portland is like most other cities in the US, the FMV is less now than it was in 2007.

 

[Jules71]

Is she also entitled to pay a portion of the loss of value of the home? If Portland is like most other cities in the US, the FMV is less now than it was in 2007.

I would think it they were forced to sell their home for less than they owed the bank, she would be responsible financially as well.

 

[razorback]

Yes twelve weeks of UNPAID leave.
So his position will be held but under FMLA he's not getting a dime.

Unless he's using sick and/or vacation time he can be paid from that. Once that runs out he will no longer get paid. After the 12 weeks are up then it's up to the employer if they want to keep the job open for you. By that time Kyron will be home anyway.

 

[wondering1]

I am betting KH has a lot more on his mind than having to write a check to oust Terri from the family home. I am betting he is a little too busy to be consumed with bitterness. That will come later. Right now he is probably more concerned with finding his son, and trying to help baby K adjust to life without mommy involved. Were I in his shoes, my priority would be getting those things accomplished and if that meant throwing Terri a little money to facilitate her getting out so I could get on with it, so be it. Time enough to be angry, bitter and mourn the loss of my money later. That's just me.

It's the gall of demanding the money that would make me totally lose it if I believed her to be guilty. Nothing to do with the money. I don't think he cares about that much, if at all, about the money, and neither would I. Frankly, if I were him I'd pay whatever it took to just be rid of her and consider it money well spent. When his lawyer spoke yesterday, it sounded like he's looking for info in exchange for the money.

And you're right about the bitterness. It sounds like when he speaks he's not thinking about anything but Kyron. *I* however, would want to rip her face off for asking *if I were him.* And that's where my attitude about it is coming from. That's what I was explaining. Maybe I'd feel the same if I was in his shoes and just be numb about this issue given that Kyron is missing. But I'm not in his shoes, and her demand p*sses me off.:furious:

 

[cmsg2002]

I would think it they were forced to sell their home for less than they owed the bank, she would be responsible financially as well.

well, if her name is not on the mortgage...this may not be so clear-cut.

 

[GrainneDhu]

I don't think I was saying that Oregon shouldn't follow statutes and I didn't say anything about her affair or her guilt.

It was simply an observation that it's not a real agreement if you don't agree to what was asked but set your own conditions for doing so.

I believe that is normally called negotiation of terms.

 

[SacreBleu]

I would think it they were forced to sell their home for less than they owed the bank, she would be responsible financially as well.

I'm thinking that this would be the case even without a forced sale. If it is true that TMH would be entitled to half of the value of any appreciation in the home during the time of the marriage (a "plus" on her side of the balance sheet, if you will); I would also think that if the value of the home during that period decreased, that she would be liable for half the depreciation (a "minus" on her side).

 

[GrainneDhu]

Again, Oregon is NOT a community property state. I think there are only 9 community property states. For some reason even LE gets confused as to whether or not we are a community property state.

In the United States there are ten community property states: Alaska, Arizona, California, Idaho, Louisiana, Nevada, New Mexico, Texas, Washington and Wisconsin. Puerto Rico

OK, 11 if you count Puerto Rico.

I wonder what definition whoever it was that wrote that is using for community property? I ask because I can think of two states that I would count as community property states (no fault divorce, marital assets divided evenly, etc) that are not included in that list.

 

[SoCalSleuth]

I thought ex parte means only one party to a case appears before the judge? In the video I saw, both attorneys were present.

No, although it is possible that someone can unilaterally apply for an emergency order without notice to the other party on an ex parte basis. Ex parte hearings are those hearings that are done on 24-48 hours notice to the other party--except as noted above.

 

[GrainneDhu]

With respect, it is also her home. She has lived with him longer than 3 years. Without her caring for that house, him, and the children he would not be able to earn a living unless he paid a housekeeper/nanny/cook etc. I wasn't speaking about who's name is on the deed or exactly how much equity she is due.
Also, I may have missed it, she seams bright enough to have covered her interest with an agreement(pre-nup) in the event that they break-up.

BBM

In my state, any period of co-habitation before the actual date of the wedding is considered as part of the duration of the marriage during divorce proceedings.

So I supported my ex all the way through his bachelor's degree before we got married (and through his Ph.D subsequent to marriage). In our divorce, he found out in a hurry that those seven years couldn't just be ignored as if they never occurred.

 

[GrainneDhu]

Why are so many people assuming TH is entitled to support? In California, a 3 year marriage, house in his name, no custody of K, she would be entitled to zip and forced to move out and pay for it herself. Plus, we have no idea what their financial arrangement was prior to this. Don't you wonder why the judge didn't grant her emergency temporary support at the hearing yesterday? My guess is that if there were any legal basis for getting it for her, her attorney would have gotten it for her.

In my state, since any period of co-habitation before a marriage is included in the duration of the marriage in divorce proceedings, the fact that the house was in KH's name would mean nothing.

It is murky as to exactly when they started co-habiting but all accounts seem to agree that it was more than a year before they moved into the current house. KH bought that house just three months before they married.

In my state, that would make some portion of the worth of the house community property.

 

[GrainneDhu]

The court "kicked her out on her *advertiser censored**," not KH. If the court rejected his allegations, she'd not have to leave. And the court is likely to be inclined to consider its own decision, and the basis for it, in determining how to handle future issues. She doesn't have to be guilty, or even charged, with Kyron's disappearance, or any other crime for that matter, to be removed from the home under the Family Abuse law -- and she will be removed under THAT law.

The restraining order was granted under FAPA. But there has been no show-cause hearing, so the order has been granted solely on the basis of allegations.

To force someone to move out of their home against their own will, I believe most judges would find it prudent to at least hold the show-cause hearing first. Particularly since the original RO did not include petitioning her to be removed from the home.