I would suggest that if drinking if so ingrained in you and your lifestyle then you'd turn and abuse it to 'cope'. I don't think people living with alcoholism, or substance abuse problems, have a thought pattern as rational as those who don't - or that people under stress as such have a rational process. I know a lot of people who hit the bottle to cope, I don't think it's right and I'm not a drinker so it's not part of my habit, but it's not a far-fetched notion.
Nah, just once you're in it it's so hard to get out. Most of the people I'm thinking of and referring to had babies very young, continue to live in housing commission (government housing), generally end up single, not very bright (sorry) and that's a big reason why they can't get out - they don't have the skills, or the knowledge to acquire the skills - they end up as they now - then there's the self-worth. It's a hard life, really.Is there any extra light you can shed on these kind of people given your past experience (sorry if that sounds like I'm treating them like zoo animals). And well done for breaking the cycle
ETA: Sorry that really does sound judgemental, I'm just really interested in the mind set... there seems to be a lack of education/career ambition going on, is that what it's like in rural areas.
Nah, just once you're in it it's so hard to get out. Most of the people I'm thinking of and referring to had babies very young, continue to live in housing commission (government housing), generally end up single, not very bright (sorry) and that's a big reason why they can't get out - they don't have the skills, or the knowledge to acquire the skills - they end up as they now - then there's the self-worth. It's a hard life, really.
My upbringing was slightly different to the ones I refer, slightly. And the main difference I believe is that both my parents worked to make it through. The families who continue the cycle tended to be poor with either both parents unemployed, or only one working very low-wage jobs.
I also think I have a little bit of smarts to recognise it all and get out - thankfully all my siblings are.
This all said - I can guarantee that if something like this had happened when I was a kid, my mum would've been drinking out of the bottle.
I'm grouchy about this today ! I don't understand the delay. If dad was threatened then he does know WHO BY. Period! If he's refusing to talk now , then I am full of TOS to say. Right? They've already taken your baby and you're very lucky she's alive and home with you . What more do you need to compel you to talk? I can understand not wanting to ' rat ' out someone because you're afraid of what they might do. They stole your child. What now ? Time to spill the beans and failure to do so is "" Schmae + TOS = ban "
Thank you for the insight, I imagined it would be a break the cycle situation, and it seems like the perfect storm of factors keeps that cycle going and going for some of these people. I guess growing up without a strong work ethic, and didn't value education this would be the result. It kind of helps to not be as judgemental when you realise there is a reason people are the way they are, although I hope Chloe and her siblings are able to break their cycle. Doesn't seem like a very pleasant life. I'm glad your upbringing was different
