Hi, PrairieWind, I think that "the sex thing" is somehow present here. What I don't yet see is an indication that some formal sexual lifestyle encounter (for, instance, submission or "gifting") was a factor. What Killgore told her grandmother is, I think, significant: She was supposed to go out on a cruise with Perez and his girlfriend, who, by all indications, is Lopez; but then the girlfriend withdrew--for unstated reasons. To me, that sounds like Lopez refused to go on her own birthday celebration because of anger, most likely anger towards one or more of the other people invited. By definition, dominatrixs do not deal with anger in prudent ways.