Actually I'm the OP and I abridged the conversation because this is a web crime community not an adoption forum, so I didn't go into detail. I said to a woman who was buying a lot of natural hair product (which I LOVE using on my kid's hair) Ours ran out and I can't get more cause it was home made by a salon and the salon is out of business I said, "I have a black daughter, do you like that hair product because I'm trying to find a new product for her hair." The woman responded "what grade is her hair?" I answered "4B which is thick and curly. The woman then responded, "your child is black?" and I said "Yes, she is," and then the woman turned around with her friend, took her bag from the clerk at the check out and left without answering the question. She didn't huff, but she didn't say anymore to me either...when I was kind and just asked a question about the product.
But it wasn't the only time we've experienced that. A woman yelled at me to "get my hands off my kid" when I was holding her hand crossing the street, "I said it was okay, I was her mom" and she yelled back "you will never be."
A clerk at Target asked whose baby was my stroller, was it my foster baby? I said, "no she's my daughter," The woman responded, "you people shouldn't be allowed to raise MY baby" the baby was not hers, she was the clerk at Target. I was my daughter's adoptive mother. I picked up my daughter (nine months a the time) and walked out, leaving all my stuff still in the cart.
So remarks from the Black community happen, however it was my black social worker and friend who got me the services I needed to help my daughter and she was the one I reached out to first to get some help...it was a very hard call, but I'm glad I made it. It was my black friend who found the beautician who is helping me with my tenderheaded kid's hair, but she's raising a white son so she gets it..
I think being a lesbian couple raising black kids may have caused more stress for this already tenuous and stressed out family.