IMO people don’t want to believe that SW did it for the same reasons.
Yes, and no? I wouldn't want to believe it of any parent, mother or father.
In this case it has happened. The evidence of the night it happened (what we have available right now) and CWs actions, followed by his words in interviews ... says to me that regardless of whether I want to believe a man murdered his children, regardless that he appeared previously to be a normal loving dad, he appears to be the person responsible for their deaths.
I wouldn't want either of them to do it. I don't see prior actions on display from either of them, with regard to the family life and the care of the children, to suggest they were capable of it.
And yet it did happen.
I would say that the alleged AP who has talked some of CW's sexual tastes could be strongly suggestive if the alleged AP is being truthful and one or more victims died of strangulation. With or without this, the evidence from that night and after suggests CW murdered them all. Going from other cases of male-perp familicide I wouldn't really expect more than a partial confession. I do not see CW's accusation as evidence against Shanann. I haven't heard anything from LE that would suggest Shanann was anything more than victim that night...we have to wait for autopsy results and other forensic evidence.
I don't see anything evidential in a mother/parent being concerned about allergens with a child at risk of anaphylactic reaction from. Was Shanann 'bossy' or was she 'assertive'? Some of these things are in the eye of the beholder, but I don't think either of them is suggestive that she killed the girls. The concern over allergies suggests she's a very protective parent. The evidence of the videos suggests she wants, as her brother has said, she wanted her girls to grow up strong, assertive, confident, but she wasn't throwing them to the wolves to achieve that, she was standing by and ready with a hug when they needed it.
We have cases of murder of children by parents that seem to be preceded by marital/relationship breaks. Generally they seem to occur post-break when the parent is left alone with the children or at the time they have their custody time and they can't face handing the child back, or they want to punish the other parent. It seems fair to say it's rare for child murder to occur at the same time the parent is informed the other partner wants to separate and while the other parent is still in the home.
I don't feel I know right now who wanted to separate, CW or SW, or if they'd discussed this in the past. It's alleged CW had said to friends or family that he'd brought up the subject of separation and Shanann hadn't taken him very seriously. What does that mean, if he was telling the truth to these other people? Was he not showing with actions that his words were serious? Maybe he had dropped hints, and Shanann was starting to think he was serious. Maybe her suspicions of an affair which she mentioned to AT were starting to get stronger and she was feeling that she didn't want to live with suspicion and distrust of her husband and that separation was starting to make more and more sense. We've heard from a friend of SW's mother in NC that Shanann was starting to seriously consider separation and talk about it with her mother. That being the case, why would Shanann snap that night if CW once again brings up the topic of separation? She has a doctor's appointment later that day for her pregnancy...is the separation such a big deal for her at this point in time compared to her concerns for her children, including the one she was growing inside her?
Another thing I wonder is how much thought CW put into the place he took the bodies. He seems to have a lot of thoughts going on about how to not get caught. He takes the bodies to a place that's in his general area of work so that he can show LE his cellphone and the GPS on it and it won't show any suspicious trips, it will just look like he left for work in the morning and went to work as normal. When NUA asks about Shanann at midday, CW has an answer...we're separating and she's probably left me, nothing to worry about, maybe she'll come back and maybe she won't. How long did it take him to come up with these ideas if he just walked in on Shanann murdering the children and he was shocked, heartbroken, and in protection mode (which he fails to display by calling 911 for ambulance and LE to attempt to save any of the children, including Nico). The only protection he displays is a desire to protect himself from being caught.
I don't want to believe CW could do this. I don't see anything in his previous behavior with the children to suggest he could do it. The alleged AP info is intriguing as it might go toward his choice of MOD. But however much I don't want to believe he could do this, whether it happened overnight or took months for him to be able to do it, I see nothing to suggest he did not do this. Surely that has to prevail over my emotive "how could any loving parent do this?".