Actually I think it was more subversive than this. She may have had a black eye (he says he was blocking her and it was accidental), he may have choked her (you know, to calm her.... as one does) but I think the bulk of his DV was the kind that doesn't leave marks and can take decades to identify. Is one thing if Suzanne adored Barry (at a point), for seeing her through her first round of cancer and for giving her her miracle babies; it's another thing entirely if he told her she was indebted to him....using what she valued against her.
By 2020, Suzanne knew that, whatever she did, therb'd be consequences, and not good ones from Barry -- because he was predictably unpredictable. There'd be a price to pay, just what would it be? Cut her off financially. Cut off her health coverage. Hurt himself. Use the girls.
IMO those were her biggest fears -- until something broke that last week. She must have realized then there may be no limit to what he might do.
JMO