For eight weeks she'd lived back and forth in her fiance's home. It all seemed like the perfect romance, but she found that he left his dirty socks and underwear on the bedroom floor, and expected someone else to pick it up, wash it, and return it laundered to his dresser. He asked her, "So, what have you got cooked for dinner for us?" ---- (with his dirty underpants still on the bedroom floor) and she caught a Greyhound bus and got the heck out of there, and so would have I.
GA - Jennifer Wilbanks, runaway bride, for false police report, Duluth, 2005
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ThoughtFox
Expecting the Unexpected
I'll post the transcript to the CNN special when it appears later tonight.
smellsarat
Former Member
But maybe Rita Cosby will have her wieghed and measured upon landing!!!quickgal said:She didn't say "exactly," she said "about." 5'9" is "about" her height.
Yes, she should publicly apologize. For crying out loud, if she needed time away to clear her head, that's one thing, but I don't believe that's what it was because it was premeditated.
If she wanted to just get away and think by herself why did she take $140 cash and leave her purse and stuff home? That seems odd to me. Also, she cut her own hair, they think, is this the action of someone who wants to be by themself? If I want time to myself, I don't go on a bus trip across the country, trying to disguise myself with shorter hair.
I don't buy the excuse of needing to get away. I don't know why she did it, but it was bizarre and an apology and financial restitution is in order for all the money she cost by having law enforcement looking for her.
Didn't she ever see a headline in a newspaper while on her trek? It makes sense to me that if she ran off on purpose, she'd want to check the news to see if she's in it and what her family thinks or whatever. I would.
Seems cruel what she did to her family by doing this.
I wonder too if the husband is involved because all the weird goings on with the lie detector test. Maybe it would've shown up that he was involved. I don't know-it's such a strange deal, but I am glad she is still alive.
If she wanted to just get away and think by herself why did she take $140 cash and leave her purse and stuff home? That seems odd to me. Also, she cut her own hair, they think, is this the action of someone who wants to be by themself? If I want time to myself, I don't go on a bus trip across the country, trying to disguise myself with shorter hair.
I don't buy the excuse of needing to get away. I don't know why she did it, but it was bizarre and an apology and financial restitution is in order for all the money she cost by having law enforcement looking for her.
Didn't she ever see a headline in a newspaper while on her trek? It makes sense to me that if she ran off on purpose, she'd want to check the news to see if she's in it and what her family thinks or whatever. I would.
Seems cruel what she did to her family by doing this.
I wonder too if the husband is involved because all the weird goings on with the lie detector test. Maybe it would've shown up that he was involved. I don't know-it's such a strange deal, but I am glad she is still alive.
Trino
Well-Known Member
Fast forward a couple of years if she marries John. What will be her next stunt? Disappearing bank account?
ThoughtFox
Expecting the Unexpected
This is a transcript from CNN about Jennifer's condition tonight. I haven't found the transcript of the special yet - they may not release one.
I think this is more than just a case of too much wedding stress!
http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0504/30/cst.06.html
Judy Kuransky, a clinical psychologist with Columbia University, joins me now, better known as Dr. Judy.
Dr. Judy, let me go over some of the terms we've been using, or hearing today about this young woman, all right, to describe her state of mind. Overstressed, all right?
DR. JUDY KURANSKY, CLINICAL PSYCHOLOGIST: Yes.
LIN: Narcissistic.
KURANSKY: Yes, selfish.
LIN: Selfish. Maybe even crazy.
KURANSKY: Yes, well, could have had a break. Yes, what else?
LIN: So what do you think?
KURANSKY: I think she had so much stress about this that she reached a point really of regression. We've seen her being covered in this way, with this little blanket. Kids know what it's like to have a blankey with you. She probably came with that from home, because she had a bag on her...
(CROSSTALK)
LIN: The towel, the striped towel that's over her head?
KURANSKY: Yes. Right, exactly.
LIN: Right now.
KURANSKY: And then we hear that the police gave her a teddy bear, and they were whispering comforting words to her. Well, I spent a lot of time working with people under trauma. And so you, what you want to do is give them teddy bears. We used to do that to all the kids and adults, by the way, after 9/11, because in that kind of stress, teddy bears are comforting. They're what we call a transitional object that makes you feel safe.
And so I think she was regressing. Now, look at the story, Carol, that she came up with. An abduction. How many times on the news have we heard lately even about little girls being abducted, being snatched from their home and taken far away? And so under stress, she came up with the same story that happens to little girls. And so I think under terrific stress, she regressed to this very young age and this really kind of regressive behavior.
LIN: All right, so does that -- because I was going to ask you, what kind of person comes up with this detailed, sinister plot of a kidnapping, with descriptions of the suspect, versus, look, I just can't handle this big wedding and we all need to talk, or just someone who just runs away, you know?
KURANSKY: Well, I think that's what -- the stress made her go back to a childhood feeling of being unsafe and being frightened and being scared and overwhelmed, and no one in the family was able obviously to talk with her. She wasn't able to share with anyone else, and you look over....
LIN: Dr. Judy, this is a wedding! It's a wedding!
KURANSKY: Yes.
LIN: I mean, it's not like, you know, it's not like, I don't know, I'm going to reach here, the death of a child, or -- it was a wedding. It was supposed to be a special, happy occasion, the beginning of this new life with this man.
KURANSKY: Yes, but Carol, if you look at some of the research, we have a scale of the impact of events, and even positive events cause stress. You add them all up, and the person can have a break.
A wedding can be equal to even -- I know people are going to be shocked about this -- the losing of someone, moving away, having a baby. All these things add just to the pressure. They could be good or they could feel bad.
What really is sad here is that, unfortunately, this woman, this 32-year-old woman, who regressed to a child and acted in this way, has done a really negative thing for women's rights, for families everywhere, because she made up a story. Now, a lot of people are not going to believe many of these stories now from here to forward. You'll hear all kinds of things about this one being taken or that one. And so there is really a sad story here for the future of women being believed.
LIN: Well, OK, let's get back to this woman's condition. I mean, so you're saying that she's in a state of regression. Our Peter Viles, who is on the same flight that this woman is on, has described her by telephone as being curled up in a fetal position. The cops gave her a teddy bear. She's got this towel over her head. I mean, is she...
KURANSKY: There you go.
LIN: Is she gone?
KURANSKY: There you go.
LIN: Is she just not with us right now?
KURANSKY: Well, that -- there you go. You see, she's curled up in a fetal position. She's back to being a child, being absolutely into that frightened state. It's going to take a long time for her to recover from this. I think she needs to be in a safe environment, in probably a rehab center, because this is a serious behavior. Just a little interview here and there, one psychologist session once a week is not really going to do it. I think they need family therapy, because obviously she was not communicating with the family. They had no idea what was going on, they even said. It's going to take a long time for her to recover from this, especially with all the media attention. It's going to be very hard for her to form a new relationship. I'm not so sure that it's going to really last with the bridegroom. He's going to be -- he's under tremendous pressure now...
~~~More at Link~~~
I think this is more than just a case of too much wedding stress!
http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0504/30/cst.06.html
Judy Kuransky, a clinical psychologist with Columbia University, joins me now, better known as Dr. Judy.
Dr. Judy, let me go over some of the terms we've been using, or hearing today about this young woman, all right, to describe her state of mind. Overstressed, all right?
DR. JUDY KURANSKY, CLINICAL PSYCHOLOGIST: Yes.
LIN: Narcissistic.
KURANSKY: Yes, selfish.
LIN: Selfish. Maybe even crazy.
KURANSKY: Yes, well, could have had a break. Yes, what else?
LIN: So what do you think?
KURANSKY: I think she had so much stress about this that she reached a point really of regression. We've seen her being covered in this way, with this little blanket. Kids know what it's like to have a blankey with you. She probably came with that from home, because she had a bag on her...
(CROSSTALK)
LIN: The towel, the striped towel that's over her head?
KURANSKY: Yes. Right, exactly.
LIN: Right now.
KURANSKY: And then we hear that the police gave her a teddy bear, and they were whispering comforting words to her. Well, I spent a lot of time working with people under trauma. And so you, what you want to do is give them teddy bears. We used to do that to all the kids and adults, by the way, after 9/11, because in that kind of stress, teddy bears are comforting. They're what we call a transitional object that makes you feel safe.
And so I think she was regressing. Now, look at the story, Carol, that she came up with. An abduction. How many times on the news have we heard lately even about little girls being abducted, being snatched from their home and taken far away? And so under stress, she came up with the same story that happens to little girls. And so I think under terrific stress, she regressed to this very young age and this really kind of regressive behavior.
LIN: All right, so does that -- because I was going to ask you, what kind of person comes up with this detailed, sinister plot of a kidnapping, with descriptions of the suspect, versus, look, I just can't handle this big wedding and we all need to talk, or just someone who just runs away, you know?
KURANSKY: Well, I think that's what -- the stress made her go back to a childhood feeling of being unsafe and being frightened and being scared and overwhelmed, and no one in the family was able obviously to talk with her. She wasn't able to share with anyone else, and you look over....
LIN: Dr. Judy, this is a wedding! It's a wedding!
KURANSKY: Yes.
LIN: I mean, it's not like, you know, it's not like, I don't know, I'm going to reach here, the death of a child, or -- it was a wedding. It was supposed to be a special, happy occasion, the beginning of this new life with this man.
KURANSKY: Yes, but Carol, if you look at some of the research, we have a scale of the impact of events, and even positive events cause stress. You add them all up, and the person can have a break.
A wedding can be equal to even -- I know people are going to be shocked about this -- the losing of someone, moving away, having a baby. All these things add just to the pressure. They could be good or they could feel bad.
What really is sad here is that, unfortunately, this woman, this 32-year-old woman, who regressed to a child and acted in this way, has done a really negative thing for women's rights, for families everywhere, because she made up a story. Now, a lot of people are not going to believe many of these stories now from here to forward. You'll hear all kinds of things about this one being taken or that one. And so there is really a sad story here for the future of women being believed.
LIN: Well, OK, let's get back to this woman's condition. I mean, so you're saying that she's in a state of regression. Our Peter Viles, who is on the same flight that this woman is on, has described her by telephone as being curled up in a fetal position. The cops gave her a teddy bear. She's got this towel over her head. I mean, is she...
KURANSKY: There you go.
LIN: Is she gone?
KURANSKY: There you go.
LIN: Is she just not with us right now?
KURANSKY: Well, that -- there you go. You see, she's curled up in a fetal position. She's back to being a child, being absolutely into that frightened state. It's going to take a long time for her to recover from this. I think she needs to be in a safe environment, in probably a rehab center, because this is a serious behavior. Just a little interview here and there, one psychologist session once a week is not really going to do it. I think they need family therapy, because obviously she was not communicating with the family. They had no idea what was going on, they even said. It's going to take a long time for her to recover from this, especially with all the media attention. It's going to be very hard for her to form a new relationship. I'm not so sure that it's going to really last with the bridegroom. He's going to be -- he's under tremendous pressure now...
~~~More at Link~~~
Fictionary was this great game where you make up meanings to a real but obscure word and who ever manages to guess the real meaning wins.
This whole thing is amusing in one way. Unfortunately at the expense of a lot of people. Kind of a kinky "runaway bride" thing. So audacioius that a WOMAN would dare do such a thing. Committment phobic men get more of the air time on this kind of thing but usually claim, amnesia.
Have any of you has ever done something this crazy?
I know the mind state that could think of this..young and maybe substance altered.
I don't know how someone could actually sustain that insanity long enough to travel that distance and compound the lies to this extent. Woo.. that's out there.
This poor woman will one day have to live with this utter humiliation and the severance of many relationships of friends and relatives. I am sorry to all who are hurt by it.
What a crazy time we live in. Not only do we go utterly nuts but do to media advances the community is now so fast and vast compounding the impact.
This whole thing is amusing in one way. Unfortunately at the expense of a lot of people. Kind of a kinky "runaway bride" thing. So audacioius that a WOMAN would dare do such a thing. Committment phobic men get more of the air time on this kind of thing but usually claim, amnesia.
Have any of you has ever done something this crazy?
I know the mind state that could think of this..young and maybe substance altered.
I don't know how someone could actually sustain that insanity long enough to travel that distance and compound the lies to this extent. Woo.. that's out there.
This poor woman will one day have to live with this utter humiliation and the severance of many relationships of friends and relatives. I am sorry to all who are hurt by it.
What a crazy time we live in. Not only do we go utterly nuts but do to media advances the community is now so fast and vast compounding the impact.
chicoliving
Former Member
Thanks ThoughtFox for posting that....I watched it and thought it was very interesting.
txsvicki
Active Member
Good grief. I thought that she might be faking the abduction especially after I read that she is a nurse. My first thought was something like Munchausen's. I hope that she is thoroughly evaluated before being allowed to return to patients. But, the huge size of that wedding and the money that must have been shelled out, it would be so much easier to claim amnesia due to some break or fugue state than to face her parents or fiancee if they were the ones paying for it all. I'm really glad that some poor Mexican people were not falsely accused and why did she claim they were Mexicans in the first place? That's not all who live in New Mexico.
LazyCat08
I may not be Glenn Beck, but I am a thinker......
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hallelujah sister!
but I still think she should have let her loved ones know she was essentially "OK" as the saying goes "the truth will set you free"... I think it definitely would've in this case....as it would've saved alot of time and resources that should be spent on those who are really in danger....
but I still think she should have let her loved ones know she was essentially "OK" as the saying goes "the truth will set you free"... I think it definitely would've in this case....as it would've saved alot of time and resources that should be spent on those who are really in danger....
BirdieBoo
New Member
I understand that there are very big stresses involved in preparing for a wedding...marriage is a life changing event. HOWEVER....I'll save my sympathies for the people who have been REALLY abducted.
PS I think she looks like she's on drugs..her eyes are HUGE in the photos they show. And 5'8" and 120 lbs is NOT a healthy or normal weight...so I'm thinking there was some sort of pharmaceutical assistance on that.
PS I think she looks like she's on drugs..her eyes are HUGE in the photos they show. And 5'8" and 120 lbs is NOT a healthy or normal weight...so I'm thinking there was some sort of pharmaceutical assistance on that.
CinnamonGirl
New Member
Well then all the sympathy in the world especially if his undies had the dreaded skid stains.God help her if she has children and has to change diarrhea diapers and be covered in vomit.She needs to stay single and get herself sterile:boohoo:
lcookster
Well-Known Member
I feel terrible for the groom-to-be. I can't imagine his pain and ultimate humiliation. How someone moves on from there....it's got to be really difficult. I am sure that this woman is mentally ill, but I hope this guy moves on and doesn't linger. I don't think this would be a healthy situation for either long-term. I hope he has good support from his family and friends.
Trino
Well-Known Member
Kuransky: "I'm not so sure it's going to really last with the bridegroom. He's going to be - he's under tremendous pressure now."
I would make a bet that she's correct. CNN carried the headlines that JW said the wedding was postponed, not cancelled. Wonder what John said.
I would make a bet that she's correct. CNN carried the headlines that JW said the wedding was postponed, not cancelled. Wonder what John said.
Camper
New Member
Amnesia would have been a better answer for her. Everyone would have felt sorrier for her!!
Phone call to John something like this: Dial number, ringa ringa, "Hello".
"Hello, John, I am ok, I donut know who I am, er where I am".
"Huh" ?
=======================End of fake call.
I did see her under the ugly afghan, wonder if that was donated to the APD?
IF she was not having a bad hair day before the afghan, then surely after it was removed.
Our church makes those Teddy Bears for children who are brought into the hospital for abuse/accidents and such.
I do think there is some major health issue behind all of this, either mental or biological.
Super glad that she was not found dead.
.
Phone call to John something like this: Dial number, ringa ringa, "Hello".
"Hello, John, I am ok, I donut know who I am, er where I am".
"Huh" ?
=======================End of fake call.
I did see her under the ugly afghan, wonder if that was donated to the APD?
IF she was not having a bad hair day before the afghan, then surely after it was removed.
Our church makes those Teddy Bears for children who are brought into the hospital for abuse/accidents and such.
I do think there is some major health issue behind all of this, either mental or biological.
Super glad that she was not found dead.
.
Gabby
The Gabster
I have thought about this a lot over the past few days.
I never felt like her finance was behind this disappearance..and I also must admit that I wondered about the 'cold feet' thing.
When Mr. Gabby and I were within 2 weeks of getting married, we both realised what a serious step it was, and we both starting getting jitters. BUT we sat down and talked about it -- and realised it was STRESS.. Being as it was my first marriage, I was afraid I couldn't adjust to being a part of a couple, and he was afraid that I would not be able to adjust to it either. BUT we did discuss it and we have had a few minor bumps with my independance, but nothing that we haven't been able to discuss and iron out. His first wife was very dependant....where I am very independant... so this was a new experience for both of us.
I can easily understand how she 'freaked' out... I am not saying that what she did was the correct thing to do, but each of us react differently under stress and a wedding no matter how small is stressful, and with one the size of the one she was planning had to be mind boggling.
I think counseling and I mean deep counseling is called for. She was so stressed she didn't think about what this was doing to her friends, and family and even the fiance. She just needed a break...
While we don't agree with how she went about handling this, I certainly don't believe that we should be judging her... "BUT BY GOD'S GRACE THERE GO I" caps are making a statement not screaming... This woman is to be pitied..and to be prayed for,not condemned.. can you imagine or begin to imagine the anguish she has been and is going through? I can't..
I never felt like her finance was behind this disappearance..and I also must admit that I wondered about the 'cold feet' thing.
When Mr. Gabby and I were within 2 weeks of getting married, we both realised what a serious step it was, and we both starting getting jitters. BUT we sat down and talked about it -- and realised it was STRESS.. Being as it was my first marriage, I was afraid I couldn't adjust to being a part of a couple, and he was afraid that I would not be able to adjust to it either. BUT we did discuss it and we have had a few minor bumps with my independance, but nothing that we haven't been able to discuss and iron out. His first wife was very dependant....where I am very independant... so this was a new experience for both of us.
I can easily understand how she 'freaked' out... I am not saying that what she did was the correct thing to do, but each of us react differently under stress and a wedding no matter how small is stressful, and with one the size of the one she was planning had to be mind boggling.
I think counseling and I mean deep counseling is called for. She was so stressed she didn't think about what this was doing to her friends, and family and even the fiance. She just needed a break...
While we don't agree with how she went about handling this, I certainly don't believe that we should be judging her... "BUT BY GOD'S GRACE THERE GO I" caps are making a statement not screaming... This woman is to be pitied..and to be prayed for,not condemned.. can you imagine or begin to imagine the anguish she has been and is going through? I can't..
I agree Gabby but I also think she was very selfish and she thought about this prior to doing it. It wasn't a complete spur of the moment. No one takes enough cash with them jogging to take a bus across country. She definately needs help dealing with stress. I've been under tremendous stress before after going thru an ugly divorce and now planning a wedding myself. Both were/are extremely stressful but there's no way I could just disappear and put my family thru all that pain. Never! No matter how much stress!
Gabby
The Gabster
alpharee said:
But I think Alpha, you are mentally more stable than this woman. I think her mental stability is in question too. I am not excusing her, I am saying that there more than likely underlying factors that we know nothing of.
kgeaux
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Gabby said:
I would have totally agreed with you, Gabby, until I read in a thread in the "Jennifer Wilbanks" section that she's done this twice before. Running away and leaving her fiance confused, her family scared seems to be a pattern with her. Knowing full well that her family knows her pattern, she escalated it this time by cutting off her hair and pitching it where it would be found--she wanted IMO everyone to think she'd been a victim of a violent crime. She's got some underlying factors, alright. I am not sure if I believe her underlying factors make this any more palatable.
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