I don't agree. My impressions from reading the transcripts of anything said by TM indicate to me she has no shame. I mean she is actually commenting nastily about Allison being a stay-at-home Mum. Calling her a "lady of lesiure" in the particular situation that arose implies she thinks Allison had it easy. I mean she had 3 children which is not exactly a walk in the park workload-wise.
Then there were all the comments about arrangements and how things could work etc, the tone of them to my mind is quite resentful, angry and unreasonable, speaking as if she (TM) feels very entitled. Something about "you don't afford me the same respect". Like - TM expected to be treated equally to Allison in all respects.
Sorry Toni, Allison was his wife, you were the mistress, and as such you have no rights! Sure, you had the right not to be abused, just as every human being does, but that's all. Sure, it might be disappointing when you have an affair with a married man and he makes promises to you which aren't delivered when you want them to be, but the reality is that you as the mistress are never going to get the time (during the affair) with your lover you think you deserve - because he is married and is spending time with his wife and family. You signed up for an affair, not a consensual arrangement between 3 where everyone has the same rights and entitlements.
I believe Toni wouldn't have liked seeing Allison at the gym because of disappointment and resentment, and her anger at GBC is diverted onto the wife, and the wife is demonised by both to justify the affair. Par for the course with affairs.