HI HI - Bernstein Family - Abigail 33, Koa Kai 11, Kush Kohole 8, lft for 1-yr boat trip w/man met online, didn't ret w/boat, sailed Honolulu, Oct 2022

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Merrill described Abigail Bernstein as someone who “lived a nomadic lifestyle,” “lived off the grid,” cut ties with her family and terminated her last known cellphone service in November 2022, a month after getting on the boat, and whose sons did not attend school.

Did she actively terminate her cell service, or was it terminated because she had a plan that she needed to replenish monthly and could not do so?

ETA note: was editing my opinion for awhile
She was a prolific poster. She seemed to love sharing her adventures and journey, for that to simple stop, is very concerning.

Would love a comment from the kids father. For him, this has been going on for almost 2 years
 
Came across this case today. Usually I find more answers in the forums, but jeez does this whole situation stink. The whole thing, top to bottom, raises so many questions.
Where were her parents? Where was her kid’s father? Why was she in Hawaii? Why did she bring the kids? Was the captain the same person who she met online? What is this year-long boat journey that keeps being discussed? How long into this voyage did they become sick? Is this vessel (from post #32) the one that they “transferred” to? Is this all just a miscommunication? Has something gone awry?

I’m hoping that this will all be solved neatly, but I don’t think that’s likely to happen. There seem to be a lot holes in this story. I hope those two kids are okay.
 
That article does suggest the captain was *probably* the man Abigail had been planning to travel with.

But it hadn't been posted yet when @ifindedout and myself were wondering if the captain and the man Abigail was meeting were the same person. You questioned why there was talk of a fourth person, and it was simply because the details still seemed to be unclear at that point.
Got it, IMO it’s not unclear. That wasn’t an article, it was an alert from the US Coast Guard. But I see your point.
 
If I had to guess, she wanted to disappear with her kids. Look at that history of Domestic Abuse (two different men over the years?)!

I hope she and her boys are somewhere safe away from anyone that could hurt them.
IMO jumping on a boat with someone you met online doesn’t necessarily sound safe…
 
Everyone interested in this case needs to read the Honolulu Star-Advertiser Article and the pages @Knox has linked here about the Ishi. Putting two and two together, I believe the captain of the Ishi, who is alive and well and commenting, is the POI from the article. I have quoted everything here for ease of perusal.

Lots of info here, Honolulu Star Advertiser

“the captain was seen returning with the boat, the family did not return.”

“FBI agents have interviewed various witnesses, family members and others, including the boat captain, who said the family got seasick and departed his vessel by unknown means, possibly another vessel, but that has not been substantiated, an FBI spokeswoman said. The FBI did not disclose the captain’s name.”

“But could it be that Bernstein was also trying to hide from someone, rather than simply living a “nomadic lifestyle.”
“Court records show Bernstein filed for and obtained two temporary restraining orders against Nelson.”


US Coast Guard Looking for Missing Sailboat, the 55-ft Sloop ‘Ishi’​

March 17, 2023 | Pacific | 1

Latitude 38 received a request from the US Coast Guard in Hawaii in search of a boat in the Pacific. The information below is provided by Search and Rescue Duty Officer Michael Cobb.​

“The Joint Rescue Coordination Center Honolulu is attempting to locate the 55FT S/V Ishi (HA-5665-G), possibly with four people on board, currently unreported in the Pacific. The background information we have is that on 03 October 2022 the S/V departed the Ala Wai on Oahu possibly to sail to Maui then to the Pacific Northwest. We have conducted extensive checks in the Main Hawaiian Islands and have not located the vessel. They departed with four people on board, the master Donald Lang, one adult Female and her two children.”​


 
The Instagram post by @HawaiiNewsNow two days ago has comments by the father, @life_the_mighty

There are two videos posted by Donald Lang’s friend, who helped him repair his boat (on The Big Island) after his return. Their Instagram is @fuck_the_grind. First video was posted 8/7/23 reporting Don Lang as missing, it also includes some of their last messages. Second video was posted 9/23/23 and includes some footage of Don’s voyage.

I wonder where @avigayil.bernstein was in Fall 2020 - Summer 2022. A post by the father on 5/19/21 claims that she initially disappeared and left with the kids 8 months before that (September 2020).
 
So the boat captain told the FBI "the family got seasick and departed his vessel by unknown means, possibly another vessel" -- how does the boat captain not know how the family left the vessel? Unless the captain was sleeping and the family left while the boat was docked at a port somewhere, I struggle to understand how the captain wouldn't know how/where the family left? And if that was the case, would the captain not have found it weird that the 3 passengers just left? And if the family left the boat because they were seasick, why would they then get on a different boat?
Yep! IIUC the captain of the yacht, even if a private or pleasure vessel is responsible for the crew, cargo, contents, and passengers? And I believe technically would have a manifest and responsibility for the passengers, cargo, and contents? And those statements attributed to the captain! …….. sitting on my hands.

Unfortunately also, I fear that international maritime sea and vessel laws (and lack of those regulations) may come into play. Sadly, how many times have we seen with large cruise line owners, someone ‘overboard’, and the resulting scenarios seeking answers or accountability? IANAL.

I will try reading the details again…… but the following seem rather unclear IMO:

When did she meet this ‘captain’?
How long knowing him?
Was it a pleasure ‘one year cruise’?
Or, did someone charter it for another?
Whose yacht was it? Or is that cloudy?
What flag was it sailing under during all travels?

Something seems way off here IMO unfortunately. I do hope if she chose to leave with her kids all are well. But fear the odds of that are not good. Did she meet this guy for a relationship? A trip? Or something else? MOO
 
The Instagram post by @HawaiiNewsNow two days ago has comments by the father, @life_the_mighty
Respectfully snipped by me.

I'm not sure we can discuss those other profiles yet. The children's father has posted on the HawaiiNewsNow post and a post by the captain's (Donald Lang) friend (@Fxxx_txx_Gxxx) instagram 42 weeks ago, I think it was. There is a lot of interesting information in there.

Hopefully this is the direct link to the HNN post:
Edited for clarity.
 
I agree that story is super hinky. But to be fair, sailing around a calm bay for an afternoon is far different than being out on the open sea 24/7.
Being on boats where you can see the horizon and being on a boat out at sea are totally different experiences
It doesn't sound like they ever made it to open sea though.
 
And why all this NOW??
I have noticed on some other cases, that LE makes such an announcement just before declaring a POI or an arrest.
But these are murkier and deeper waters
(pun intended)
If the story went down as it's being told so far and the family disappeared from the boat, I think we are unlikely to see an arrest unless there's significant evidence on the boat.

What was the semi-recent case of a wife or girlfriend going missing off her partner's boat? It looked like foul play was probable but I believe an arrest was never made because of a lack of evidence.

ETA: found the case I was looking for, it was Sarm Heslop. Apologies if this has already been mentioned. Mum's Caribbean murder fear over missing daughter - BBC News
 
Last edited:
<snipped & BBM>
There is no international maritime law that requires a captain to stay on a sinking ship, but many countries either have their own laws or subscribe to international treaties that mandate certain behavior.

South Korea, for instance, is a member of the International Maritime Organization which has its own rules for captains outlined in the International Convention for the Safety of Life at Sea. The convention doesn't mandate that the captain stay on board, but its rules suggest a captain is always responsible for the people on board.

"There is nothing in any IMO Convention to specifically require a captain to stay on board the vessel in the event of an incident such as this, however he/she does retain full responsibility for the safety of the vessel and those on board," IMO spokesman Lee Adamson told ABC News in an email today.
 

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