In Fairness To Cindy

[FightTheOstrich]

I have a son with Asperger's Syndrome, a type of autism. Unless you know a child with this disorder, you cannot know how difficult it was to raise him. However, I continued to make him accountable for his negative behavior because I knew that someday he would be out in the world and others would not coddle him. I did this because I love him and wanted him to be a healthy, independent adult someday.

At the risk of sounding "mean", I think CA has not been a parent to KC in the least and that is one of many reasons that we are here today. I feel bad for her grief, but she contributed to KC's behavior by not making her accountable and protecting her from the consequences of her actions.

You're what most of us call a good parent. Hats off to you!!! :clap:

 

[stilettos]

Do you feel the same emotion about GA not being able to get between Caylee and the danger she faced through her mother? Maybe his "hi gorgeous", "hi beautiful" and other stroking words undermined any attempts CA made at bringing KC back in line.

I agree that GA should also have seen signs of some type of dysfunction in Casey's thinking. Yes he should have atteppmted in some way to get help for his own daughter and protect Caylee from obvious neglect. (and possibly worse) I do not know whether he was following some law enforcement technique in that clip. I do think it smacks of highly inappropriate boundaries between he and Casey. Any more, I don't know enough to say.

 

[coco puff]

Cindy Anthony did not knowingly ask to be involved in this mess. I believe all of us have chosen to be involved. This is her life not ours. It was her granddaughter not ours. This is her daughter not ours. No one says she is perfect, but this is her life not ours. We chose to get involved. She is responsible for herself - we are responsible for ourselves.:chicken:

Just because it is her granddaugher does not mean she has the right to Lie to LE to cover up a murder. I think she did just that. I don't care how perfect or not perfect she is. I just don't want us to begin to tolerate OJ from parents just because they are in denial or just because they didn't ask for the situation.

 

[Kimster]

How do you know Cindy hasn't been a parent to KC? Every friend of KC said that she was a good mother who seemingly loved her child and took care of her. That something happened, doesn't make it Cindy's fault. It could be that Cindy was a good parent and the fault whatever it is, lies with KC.

I based my assumption that CA protected KC from her own actions based on doc dumps that CA's mother wrote about the problem with KC before Caylee was missing and internet posts by her brother. I also formed my opinion with the fact that KC still lived at home with her parents and didn't contribute financially to the household since she said she had a job that did not exist. My opinion only.

 

[FightTheOstrich]

In Fairness To Cindy: No matter how I feel about her I must give her credit. I believe that her antics, tantrums, rudeness and overall outlandish behavior have served to garner 10 times the amount of interest in this case than would be normal. Cindy, more than any person (even Casey) turned this case into the number three story of 2008. In turn, this has brought a team of the finest attorneys in the land together. A team that might be good enough to get a reduced sentence for her daughter despite the evidence.

Gotta give Cindy that credit.

She might actually deserve credit had Caylee actually been kidnapped and missing. CA knew Caylee was dead. Her crazy antics were part of a cover-up not an effort to find Caylee. Her crazy behavior has not really helped in anyway. Sure, it's helped her sell and exploit her grandchild and the situation.

 

[Kimster]

You're what most of us call a good parent. Hats off to you!!! :clap:

THank you :blush:

And to those who are still raising your kids and you feel like you're going crazy doing the right thing let me say, it is WORTH it! My son is now excelling in college, is able to drive his own car, and even has FRIENDSHIPS. These are all things that I was told would not happen for him. Being a parent is never easy but certainly worth it when you are looking back. :blowkiss:

 

[elfie]

Given this entire case from the beginning Cindy certainley hasn't been looked at in a positive light. We have been mortified and angered at her for her behavior during this entire nightmare.
Yes, she really missed it big time in the parenting of Casey. But after the Aug. 14th video was released, I am beginning to see some things different. I saw a desperate, heartbroken, woman. It was one thing to see the real Casey, but I couldn't keep my eyes off of Cindy. I could, as a mother myself of a disturbed, wayward child, (not a lying murderer) somehow relate. I was hearbroken for her. I pray I never have to go through what she is now, and will, for the rest of her life.

One thing in particular that has been bugging me is the chili incedent. I've read several posts about how Caylee did not like chili, but Cindy fixed it anyway for Caylee's 3rd Birthday and we all thaught that that was odd.
Actually, Cindy fixed the chili for Caylee because she did like it to there suprise. Shirley P statement to the detectives said she fixed chili, but fixed her a peanut butter & jelly sandwich because they didn't think Caylee would like it. But, she did; she just didn't eat alot because she had eaten alot of popcorn at the nursing home. I know that thats not a huge thing, but it seems that Cindys motive for fixing Caylee chili was misinterpreted a little. I believe it was actually a loving gesture to Caylee.

http://www.docstoc.com/docs/1643165/Plesea-Shirley---Statement


I'm just wondering...does anyone else have any thoughts of where we have been perhaps a little to quick to take Cindy (and George) out of context?

:heart:

(I don't think Caylee's 3rd birthday was the day of the chili meal.)

We really only have one context for direct observations of Cindy's behavior and it all surrounds her missing granddaughter, Caylee, and her daughter charged with neglect and then murder. All statements that we are familiar with about Cindy from Casey's friends have been made with that context in mind, in retrospect.

Not really having much background aside from a video from Caylee's 2nd birthday, videos and photos of Cindy interacting with Caylee from the past, and comments surrounding Casey's pregnancy, I think Cindy is being judged harshly for the most part, in light of the immense pain that she must be suffering.

I certainly can identify with the feelings of frustration that are expressed but don't understand the hatred that not only escalates the rhetoric to a fevered pitch but acts as a catalyst for continued maligning.

 

[eddeva]

as much as cindy infuriates me, and she does, the woman's suffered so much pain in the last 6mos it's impossible for me to not have sympathy for her, or should i say in spite of her.

 

[mikeysmommom]

It is so easy for people to say "I would do this or I would do that" when in reality you have no Idea how you would really act in such a horrible situation. I think CA acted the way most of us would have in the beginning. Callling LE when she did.

The whole situation is beyond what most of us will never have to endure. It was easy for me to sit in my house and judge too. Then after volunteering for one of the big searches we went to their house. At the time the media and protesters were at full tilt. There were people throwing things at the house yelling, honking the horn, all kinds of craziness. CA came out of the house to check on what was being thrown. It was the first time it really hit me that she was a human being caught up in this nightmare. It really shocked me at my reaction to seeing her in real life. I cried for her. And felt ashamed at gawking. She lives in a neighborhood similar to mine and I could not imagine sitting in my home knowing there were dozens of people just out side my windows yelling and doing all kinds of things. These people lived their lives just like we all do pretty quietly.
Were mistakes made in raising KC for sure, can any of us really say we have made every right decision? NO. What is happening to their family is KC's fault this has already killed Caylee and it will do the same to CA and GA just more slowly. This should not be the punishment people think they desereve.

I am a pretty mellow person most of the time. When I saw some of the reactions that CA and GA had to the protesters I think I would have shoved some of them clear on their *advertiser censored**es just out of frustration. We can not even begin to understand the pressure they are under.

I am not saying that if there has been any cover ups along the way that they should be swept under the rug or anything like that. KC should be prosecuted to the full extent the law allows what she did is unimaginalble. I think the A's all of them should come clean with anything they know. Justice for Caylee should be the focus. KC made her choice back in June.

Very Insightful post .IMO

 

[Dog-ma1]

I also have a son with Aspergers, and yes at times I don't want to be too hard on him, but I have to be for his own good. I also have a daughter the same age as KC, and if this God forbid, happened in my family, I would get to the truth, and punish whoever the perp was, even my own daughter. I would not lie, cheat or put on public displays of "my kid would never....." I also would not have the kahonas to lie to LE!

 

[stilettos]

:clap::clap:

I also have a son with Aspergers, and yes at times I don't want to be too hard on him, but I have to be for his own good. I also have a daughter the same age as KC, and if this God forbid, happened in my family, I would get to the truth, and punish whoever the perp was, even my own daughter. I would not lie, cheat or put on public displays of "my kid would never....." I also would not have the kahonas to lie to LE!

:clap::clap::clap::clap::clap: I bow to your excellent post!!

 

[Pink Panther]

I feel pity and compassion for this family. I don't believe anyone goes out looking for a situation like the one their in and certainly, no one deserves it!

That said, I find it hard to accept that a "good parent" has NO IDEA that the adult daughter living under her roof doesn't have a job and doesn't have a nanny for her grandchild. I find it horrible to think that this same "good parent" is running around telling her daughter's friends that she's a lying, stealer sociopath, without worrying enough about her grand-daughter's well-being to ensure that she's being properly cared for during the day.

I still feel compassion and pity...But I can't ignore what's obvious.

MOO

 

[ExpectingUnicorns]

I absolutely hate to see anyone hurting! But the pain that I see and can relate to does not erase wrong-doings. I feel sorry for Cindy's pain but still feel she was sooooo wrong about so many things she did. It doesn't sound nice, but being honest, I have to admit that I hold both sorrow and contempt for her in my heart.

 

[Kimster]

I also have a son with Aspergers, and yes at times I don't want to be too hard on him, but I have to be for his own good. I also have a daughter the same age as KC, and if this God forbid, happened in my family, I would get to the truth, and punish whoever the perp was, even my own daughter. I would not lie, cheat or put on public displays of "my kid would never....." I also would not have the kahonas to lie to LE!

:blowkiss::woohoo:

 

[radio]

I also have a son with Aspergers, and yes at times I don't want to be too hard on him, but I have to be for his own good. I also have a daughter the same age as KC, and if this God forbid, happened in my family, I would get to the truth, and punish whoever the perp was, even my own daughter. I would not lie, cheat or put on public displays of "my kid would never....." I also would not have the kahonas to lie to LE!

I know you wish what you say to be true. But honestly you nor I nor anyone else is anybody to be saying what we would do in such and such situation and imply that we are a pay grade above someone else.

 

[mes1955]

*respectfully snipped

what 'truth' exactly do you mean?

??? Am I missing something, or are a lot of conclusions being drawn based on bits and pieces of information and mis-information?

 

[Cherry Ames]

Just listening to Cindy slam and cast suspicion on others during her police interviews was enough to put me off. Why is it that she found perfectly innocuous actions by others "strange" or "weird" and yet she buys all of her daughter's ridiculous stories with no problem? As a teacher I've met many parents like her - things are always someone else's fault, not their little darling. She comes off like a bossy bully - I sure wouldn't have wanted her for a nurse if I was a patient. I can imagine:
Nurse Cindy, coming into the examining room:
NC: I haven't changed that paper yet! What's the deal?!! Get off the #@#@# table!
Me: But the doctor said...
NC: (Interrupting) The doctor said! Blah! Blah! Blah!
Me: Well...in his opinion...
NC: His OPINION? He's so opinionated! In my family we ALL respect each other's opinions! Now get the ##$@#$ OFF!

 

[mikeysmommom]

Just because it is her granddaugher does not mean she has the right to Lie to LE to cover up a murder. I think she did just that. I don't care how perfect or not perfect she is. I just don't want us to begin to tolerate OJ from parents just because they are in denial or just because they didn't ask for the situation.

If Le has cause to arrest her they will. Le knows alot more then we do,and they have not arrested anyone as of yet.In my state never have the LE cared if you were greiving,or wait til a funeral is over to arrest a person if they have due cause.

 

[abbra]

Cindy Anthony has alll the symptoms of Grief.

Potential Symptoms of the Acute Grief Response
Physical Symptoms :

Fatigue, Feelings of Exhaustion
Weakness
Shortness of breath
Tightness in the throat
Palpitations
Nausea
Diarrhea
Constipation
Aches and pains - Abdominal, stomach pain, back pain, headache
Lightheaded, Dizziness
Trouble sleeping
Change in appetite, increased or decreased leading to change in weight
Change in sex drive
Crying, sighing
Restlessness.

Emotional Symptoms :

Emotionally labile
Sadness
Anger, Irritability
Panic, Anxiety
Meaninglessness, Helplessness
Apathy
Numbness, Disbelief, Denial
Longing
Abandonment, Loneliness
Self Blame
Fear
Guilt
Relief


Behavioral/Psychological Symptoms :

Forgetfulness
Difficulty concentrating, Slowed thinking
Wandering aimlessly
Feeling trance-like
Sense of unreality or emptiness
Dreams of the deceased
Searching for the deceased
Sense the loved one's presence
Hallucinations of the deceased, sensing their presence (visual or auditory)
Assuming mannerisms or traits of the loved one
Needing to retell the story of the loved one's death
Avoiding talking about loss so others won't feel uncomfortable.


Social Symptoms:

Overly sensitive
Dependent
Withdrawn
Avoiding others
Lack of initiative or interest
Hyperactive
Underactive
Relationship difficulties
Lowered self esteem.


Spiritual:

Doubting belief system
Questioning spiritual values
Spiritual injury
Loss of faith
Disappointment in religion, clergy and church members
Feeling betrayed by God or Spiritual Force
Angry with God or Deity
Preoccupied with own death
Sensing presence (visual or auditory)


Taken from : http://dying.about.com/od/lossgrief/a/normal_grief_4.htm

Each and every one of us who have been through horrific trauma react differently but experience some of the above symptoms of grief. This is the time where people will try and have taken advantage of Cindy because they see her vulnerability. Cindy hasn't had enough time to ingest that her little Caylee whom she loved with all her heart is not coming home. By Caylee not being buried yet it could be that Cindy wants to try to hold on to the only good she has had in her turmoiled fill life. She may not be ready to say goodbye to her either as the wound of loss is fresh, plus I read where Jose Baez is the one who would be releasing Caylees Remains!!! Baez should have no jurisdiction over Caylees remains. He's not family. If he has power of attorney over Caylees remains, that has got to be another slap in the face by Casey to Cindy where Casey gives garbage to Cindy over and over even from behind bars. Lets face it, judging from the jailhouse tapes the animosity from Casey toward her mother is clearly evident and Cindy is a punching bag. Cindy lost control of Casey a lone time ago and now even though Cindy is trying to defend Caseys actions to others deep down her heart knows the truth- but grief won't let her believe what others are saying about Casey. Caseys actions don't put Cindy in a good light as a mother and all the world is out to judge Cindy Anthony. Concluding If Cindy has done any wrong in trying to block justice I think its going to have to be looked at very closely by experts in the psychiatric field to see if it was intentional or done because of grief.

 

[mydailyopinions]

I can't even find the words to explain how I feel about Cindy.
I don't always have a negative thought, but not always a good one either. I am so in between most of the time with her that finding a way to explain it would be next to impossible.
ETA: I don't think that it is fair to judge parents for actions that we only have known going back 1 year as to where they have been good parents for a child's entire life.
If I were to go out today, and commit a crime that no one seen coming, not one person could go back and blame my parents for my actions, or judge the way they raised me no matter how my mother may act about my situation. JMHO