MA - Conrad Roy, 18, urged by friend, commits suicide, Fairhaven, 13 July 2014

[flourish]

for me, the first picture says it all. Entitled little sh...t

Wow, I want to just smack the smug right off her pouty face, little selfish see you next Tuesday! I couldn't finish reading the texts. They were awful. My older brother killed himself as a teenager over thirty years ago. My remaining five siblings and I miss him so much. I would have a difficult time restraining myself if I found out someone had said those kinds of things!


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[bluesneakers]

I am aghast. This is a psychopath full of herself. It is all about Carter. What a waste of humanity.

I lost my husband to mental illness (he is alive, but we are divorced). there was not ONE day that I didn't fear for suicide, that I did not pray and beg and bargain with God over his health. And he never got better. It was devastating, watvching him disappear, become not even a memory of who he was. This @%#@^^# is the works kind of person. How DARE SHE. How. I am in tears and friends, y'all know that ain't easy.

I'm sorry. :grouphug:

 

[believe09]

The defense, the defense....what he is doing is turning the prosecution's assertions around in her favor.

That alone should say something loud and clear here ie: how effective that argument is when you consider Carter bullying Conrad into suicide. Detestable, but expected.

I think his only other course of action is her own diminished capacity-we know it is coming. McLean is looming on the horizon here. jmvho.

 

[Champagne4lulu]

Just started following this. Horrific. Can anyone tell me what explanation she has offered to justify why she sent this boy to his death. I've seen something about brainwashing. By whom? She seemed hellbent on making him kill himself. Why? What's the chance of this proceeding to trial and chance of conviction?

She doesn't seem to show any remorse at all. What kind of monster is she? 😟

 

[Steleheart]

The defense, the defense....what he is doing is turning the prosecution's assertions around in her favor.

That alone should say something loud and clear here ie: how effective that argument is when you consider Carter bullying Conrad into suicide. Detestable, but expected.

I think his only other course of action is her own diminished capacity-we know it is coming. McLean is looming on the horizon here. jmvho.

Agree fully. Defense is grasping at straws but we know that her stay at McLean will be next.

 

[believe09]

Just started following this. Horrific. Can anyone tell me what explanation she has offered to justify why she sent this boy to his death. I've seen something about brainwashing. By whom? She seemed hellbent on making him kill himself. Why? What's the chance of this proceeding to trial and chance of conviction?

She doesn't seem to show any remorse at all. What kind of monster is she? 

I have been following this since she was charged, and I can share my opinion. Think of what we know about munchausen's by proxy-I dont think that characterization is too far off. Carter found an extremely vulnerable peer and because she had been immersed in some kind of psychiatric environment herself (jmvho), she chose her words and actions very carefully to see if she could push him off the cliff. The kick was the power and the attention she would receive afterwards. She devoted some serious time and attention to this-she saw herself as a puppet master I think....she would text, email and call his family all the while knowing what he had done.

If you read the earlier media you will note that when her friends were interviewed, they said that she was needy, grandiose and a liar. They took all of it with a grain of salt.

Even her FRIENDS thought she was a wing nut.

I think that she is more than that-I think she is a pretty dark character who isnt very bright. She read one person very well and pushed him to his death. It doesnt make her an evil genius, just very ill. I think the legal basis for the charges are sound-look at Minnesota and what they have been up to regarding this subject. I also think this is an excellent test case-this isnt first amendment rights. This is someone who hounded a vulnerable boy into killing himself. He had tried this same formula before and his female counterpart saved him. I think Conrad believed she would save him...hopefully because he was well worth saving. She saw herself as the star of the show and let him die and then (imo) gloated at her knowledge and her role. Until LE got to his phone. She must have been waiting for that shoe to drop for months and months.

 

[believe09]

To answer the other part of your question-her defense attorney claims she believed that she was acting out of kindness because she just knew he would be miserable until he succeeded, so she figured she would force him to do it so he could finally be at peace.

Read the texts about how she tells him, in a passive way, that his family is tired of him and that they wont mind if he kills himself. And how they will just get on with their lives.

Maybe she was really speaking to herself when she pushed that button in him. IDK.

 

[Dogface]

Another newbie here too. Like many others have mentioned this case really bothers me. While I know it's not illegal to know of someone's intent to harm themselves and not intervene (tell someone they are related to, contact the authorities, etc) I do think it's morally wrong. This case goes way beyond that. I will never understand how she could call him her boyfriend& yet repeatedly encourage him to comitt suicide. I agree w/those stating it's a combination of the way she was raised& probably an underlying mental illness too but it still doesn't make it any less horrifying.

I followed this case closely in the beginning and stepped away because it was very upsetting to read the way things went down. But it just dawned on me, this is like a teenage "gone girl", I really think the psychology of her and her family needs to be studied to see what created the grounds for her so called "compassion".

 

[Dogface]

Here is the FOIA on the text messages. This is one of the worst documents I have ever read in my life....I would say that any doubts should be stripped away after you complete your review:

TEXT MESSAGES

Sick. Simply sick.

 

[believe09]

I followed this case closely in the beginning and stepped away because it was very upsetting to read the way things went down. But it just dawned on me, this is like a teenage "gone girl", I really think the psychology of her and her family needs to be studied to see what created the grounds for her so called "compassion".

I think that is an excellent point. I hope that there is some kind of frame of reference that goes along with her psych history...should there be one and should it be introduced that is.

I think that there has been an underlying push to frame Conrad as a blue collar troubled boy and that Carter is the doe eyed prom queen who was swept away trying to help a friend. But all roads lead back to her-his family and friends are adamant that she was not a girlfriend, in fact his friends had never even heard of her. They met out of state and had known each other for a year, iirc. They never dated.

I frequently think about his family and how they are voiceless in many ways-mainly because they arent going to get down in the mud, but also because there seems to be something going on which is pushing the Carter agenda.

I ask you-did any of you read the School Handbook for her HS? Why was she permitted to attend school and graduate with her class? She is charged with a felony. Do you suppose the administration offered any kind of counseling geared towards addressing what happened and how to deal with a situation like this? I guess we will see as the rest of this unfolds. In the interim, I am curious as to whether or not she will be heading off to school to enjoy her freshman year.

 

[believe09]

A few snippets from some of the texts that might explain her mind set:

CARTER: [Friend’s name], his death is my fault. Like, honestly I could have stopped it. I was the one on the phone with him and he got out of the car because he was working and he got scared and I [expletive] told him to get back in, [friend's name], because I knew he would do it all over again the next day and I couldn't have him live that way the way he was living anymore. I couldn't do it. I wouldn't let him.​

And therapy didn't help him and I wanted him to go to McLeans with me when I went but he would go in the other department for his issues but he didn't want to go because he said nothing they would do or say would help him or change the way he feels.​

CARTER: And that night I knew he was going to do it and a part of me thought he wasn't going to like always but when he stopped talking to me on the phone, like, I knew he did it, and a couple of days before leading up to it I guess I kind of let him do it. I started giving up because whatever I said I knew I couldn't change his mind so we talked about it and about how I'll take care of his family when he's gone and all of that...I knew he was in the Kmart [expletive] parking lot. I knew he was going to use the generator to inhale carbon monoxide. I knew it all. But I didn't think he would actually go through with it or that it would work, and that's why I feel like it's all my fault because I knew what he was going to do but I didn't call anyone to stop him.​

It's just hard because, like, I was the only one that knew and I, like, said yesterday everyone talks about how they wished he had someone to talk to and told what he was feeling to and I was that person so I'll always feel guilty about it.​

Like, I'm the reason everyone was in that church yesterday. But you're right. He was just going to do it another time and I'm thankful for talking about everything we did know knowing he was going to die. It's just you think I'm a bad person for doing what I did?​

... I was the last person he talked to so I feel special that I had that moment with him? It's hard to accept it now that it actually happened but I know he's finally happy. I told him it was okay to do it because he was miserable and I knew he would always be in pain and I just couldn't stand to see him like that anymore.​

(I underlined the reference to McLean where she indicates she was/is being treated)

In the end it was all about her and what she let happen, caused to happen etc...imo it gets even more obvious and worse when she moves on to the Homer's for Conrad event.

 

[Steleheart]

A few snippets from some of the texts that might explain her mind set:




(I underlined the reference to McLean where she indicates she was/is being treated)

In the end it was all about her and what she let happen, caused to happen etc...imo it gets even more obvious and worse when she moves on to the Homer's for Conrad event.

I think you're right on the money with what you bolded.

Another thought - from your snippets (HTML quotes don't carry forward);

"CARTER: [Friend’s name], his death is my fault. Like, honestly I could have stopped it. I was the one on the phone with him and he got out of the car because he was working and he got scared and I [expletive] told him to get back in, [friend's name], because I knew he would do it all over again the next day and I couldn't have him live that way the way he was living anymore. I couldn't do it. I wouldn't let him."

IMO she was really sick of it and wasn't getting any attention because of his suicidal talk anymore so she wanted to be rid of it and have a new focus on herself due to her tragic loss. She only partially tells the truth to her friend, acts as if she was out of options and wanted him to be at peace, when really it was her who wanted be at peace and get back to getting attention.

She lies to her friend when she says "But I didn't think he would actually go through with it or that it would work, and that's why I feel like it's all my fault "

This was after she said "I * told him to get back in [the truck]"

IMO she 'feared" he may not go through with it and she was telling people he was likely dead already even though she was talking to him. That would have sucked for her and her plan.

MOO

 

[believe09]

I think her defenders are slipping away one by one. But I hope no one is forgetting that on the other end of that phone was a boy with his life ahead of him who grabbed on with both hands to a girl who was busy peeling back his grip one finger at a time.

 

[EllieBee]

Here is the FOIA on the text messages. This is one of the worst documents I have ever read in my life....I would say that any doubts should be stripped away after you complete your review:

TEXT MESSAGES

Just catching up.

I. Just. Can't. Even.

I do not often feel pure hate for another person, but this beeotch? Um, she is evil.

She needs never to again be a part of society.

I am not truly shocked very often, and although I knew this "person" was responsible for doing great harm, I had no idea how mean and cold she really is.

 

[Dogface]

I think you all bring up great points about her wanting attention which is why she pushed him.

I wonder if in her community or this time frame someone she either knew personally or if she knew off went through a boyfriend/girlfriend suicice and she saw the show of support for them, or if someone was on tv talking about creating an organization for a friend/partner who committed suicide and she wanted that. (Sorry if this has been discussed, I did step away from some time).

 

[bluesneakers]

Just catching up.

I. Just. Can't. Even.

I do not often feel pure hate for another person, but this beeotch? Um, she is evil.

She needs never to again be a part of society.

I am not truly shocked very often, and although I knew this "person" was responsible for doing great harm, I had no idea how mean and cold she really is.

Same here. It's not often I have this kind of seething hatred inside. It's unfamiliar and frightening, frankly, but I have nothing else for her.

 

[EllieBee]

Moral culpability, yes. No question.

Legal culpability? I'm not so sure. But IANAL.

It will be very interesting to see how this case plays out within our legal system.

ETA: Just for clarification, I am not defending her. I'm only considering the legal aspect.

Yours is a wise position. I wish I could be more circumspect. I usually am checking in to WS after a long day and am rather emotional in my responses.

I agree that this is gonna be hard to prosecute, despite the vomit-inducing evil words this subhuman piece of trash used to push this poor young man to his death.

I am just sick.

 

[EllieBee]

Wow, I want to just smack the smug right off her pouty face, little selfish see you next Tuesday! I couldn't finish reading the texts. They were awful. My older brother killed himself as a teenager over thirty years ago. My remaining five siblings and I miss him so much. I would have a difficult time restraining myself if I found out someone had said those kinds of things!


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I am so sorry. You are a lovely person, as far as I can know that via WS, and your compassion always is in the forefront of your posts. Now I partially understand why.

(((Hugs)))

 

[EllieBee]

I am aghast. This is a psychopath full of herself. It is all about Carter. What a waste of humanity.

I lost my husband to mental illness (he is alive, but we are divorced). there was not ONE day that I didn't fear for suicide, that I did not pray and beg and bargain with God over his health. And he never got better. It was devastating, watvching him disappear, become not even a memory of who he was. This @%#@^^# is the works kind of person. How DARE SHE. How. I am in tears and friends, y'all know that ain't easy.

I am so sorry for your struggles with a mentally ill loved one. It can be all-consuming and often the guilt trips a mentally ill person will heap on you can send you into your own crisis.

You truly begin to believe that you cannot sleep, eat, take your attention fron them for a single second, because if you do, they will end their life and it is ALL YOUR FAULT.

I won't go into details, but my phone would ring at 3 am and I always answered because if I did not, it would be ALL MY FAULT.

20 years later I know it is NOT my fault. I was held in a cycle of emotional blackmail until the day I realized I wanted to have my own life more than I wanted to assure he would not end his life.

It was the single most freeing moment in my 50 years of life.

All this to say, breaking away from a loved one who is holding you hostage with threats of self-harm is so very difficult. But it is important that if you are in this situation, you try. And do whatever you can to get professional help for your loved one.

That said, a person who would goad, push and encourage, even BULLY a loved one to take their own life is an abhorrent .

Peace and love to all who have walked with loved ones through pain and sadness we cannot comprehend.

 

[seattlechiquita]

I am so sorry for your struggles with a mentally ill loved one. It can be all-consuming and often the guilt trips a mentally ill person will heap on you can send you into your own crisis.

You truly begin to believe that you cannot sleep, eat, take your attention fron them for a single second, because if you do, they will end their life and it is ALL YOUR FAULT.

I won't go into details, but my phone would ring at 3 am and I always answered because if I did not, it would be ALL MY FAULT.

20 years later I know it is NOT my fault. I was held in a cycle of emotional blackmail until the day I realized I wanted to have my own life more than I wanted to assure he would not end his life.

It was the single most freeing moment in my 50 years.

.

Snipped by me.

Sister, you get me. Guilt. Shame. Xoxoxo


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