MI - Nevaeh Buchanan, 5, Monroe, 24 May 2009 - Body found - #6

[nursebeeme]

http://mojo.channel955.com/cc-commo...449&STATION_ID=WKQIM-IP&TRACK=Nevaeh_Buchanan

more from this interview:
she thinks it is someone involved with GK... like his girlfriend, etc... motive: get back or money owed... it is nothing she claims to know about personally just her mind trying to come up with scenarios.

All of her interviews were at least five hours long. The first one was seven hours. She claims she is not worried because she had nothing to do with the vanishing of her daughter.

When asked why she never shows emotion... she says she shows it in her own home.. She says if she cries people will want her to stop. If she doesn't cry she is guilty.. .She says she waits to cry until she doesn't have an audience? ((aside... how can you cry on command))

Says when she heard about the river finding... that day she had been out looking at the Sterling State park and got a call to come home.

She believes her daughter is up in Heaven right now.

She says Neveah is the "monroe angel" and describes her as happy and very independant. Her mom says, "I was very proud of her"

Radio host asks her to respond to the finger pointers. She says, "there is nothing I can say there is always going to be someone with their assumptions". She claims that if people got the time to know her they wouldn't think that way. She has denied talking to GK since his arrest and holds him responsible in her mind.

She says this wouldn't be easy for anyone.

 

[nomoresorrow]

One of the things that originally drew me to WS's was that there were so many survivors here who not only broke cycles of abuse in their own life/children's life, they were passionate and outspoken about awareness & prevention of abuse in the life's of all children. I am proud as a survivor myself to be a part of that. Sadly I don't even share that connection with the other 4 individuals who were victimized by the same perpetrator(s) as myself over the course of thier childhood - my siblings. I am the one in five. I told the secrets and broke the silence. For that I changed my life and the life's of my children but it did not change the life's of my siblings who went onto deny, call me a liar, protect the abuser, subject their own children to the abuser and abuse their own children themselves. I have lived with a type of survivors guilt for many years because I was not able to bring my siblings along in the recovery/wellness process. I am in no way excusing JB's behavior here whatsoever but I can't help but think that I have met many other JB's in my life, including in my own family. Although I don't know the events surrounding JB's upbringing, I see an individual who is extremely detached. She lacks the ability to gage and assess danger because of that detachment. Research tells us that those abused as children are more likely to be victimized as adults - they are more likely to place themselves in dangerous situations without even recognizing the danger around them. This is part of the detachment. What may have served them well as a child in order to survive the unthinkable, ironically works against them as adults and it renders them incapible of protecting their own child(ren). The "mother's instinct" that many refer to is not instinctional to the detached mother. Instinctional to her is minimizing other's behavior, (it's not that bad) even, as an adult, crediting her abuse as "making her strong," thereby denying the negative affects that it had upon her and likewise with her child(ren), "Hey I survived it and it didn't hurt me, it only made me stronger, they'll survive it too." There are no inner red flags or alarm bells in a detached mother. This is the danger when abused children grow up and have children of their own - they may not abuse their own child directly but instead subject them to other's who will/do. We hear it and see it over and over again with woman/mothers. JB, in my opinion, is a classic case = "Daddy George." So while I feel blessed that I was not able to deny the truth about my abuse, I also take with me the awareness that 4 of my fellow victims were not able to accept that truth and in so doing, continued the cycle of abuse, directly and/or indirectly in the life's of their own children. It takes more than words such as, "When I have kids I'm never going to do to them what was done to me," it takes therapy to undo the years of disassociation and detachment behaviors that allowed one to survive but now endanger their life and more especially, the life of the child they bring into this world. In my opinion this is critical in preventing access to children by sex offenders!
JMOO

 

[nursebeeme]

http://mojo.channel955.com/cc-commo...449&STATION_ID=WKQIM-IP&TRACK=Nevaeh_Buchanan

this is from part two of the radio interview

they came in to jennifer's today and said ID could take until the end of this week or even into next week.

The body is not identifiable.

(((((((sorry for this long post... just transcribed the radio show for those who cannot click))))))))

She is concerned that everyone wants to put her in the category of parents who harm their children

 

[impatientredhead]

I haven't caught up but I want to respond to the above. While I understand the point that is being made, one thing is sticking in my craw. Everyone is acting as if JB was adjudicated to be unfit, and custody was taken away from her. This is not the case. GM was guardian simply bc JB was going to prison and for no other reason that I am aware of. GM still had custody, but that, I believe, was more a function of not having gone to the court to change custody back to JB. No one ever said that JB couldn't care for NB, be around NB, or anything of the sort. And her conviction for home invasion would not lead to that conclusion, either, as the crime has nothing to do with harming her.

Just because someone has committed a felony does not mean that their parental rights are terminated.

No, her rights were not terminated.

The fact remains that in the course of 118 days JB returned to her daughters life after being absent for 2 years, brought multiple registered sex offenders into her life despite family dissent, had an intimate relationship with one of these sex offenders, in her own words put him in the role of a father figure and on day 118 at a minimum did not know where her daughter was while a murdering child rapist ended her life.

Defending JB's choices and her rights as a mother are not high on my list. As you mentioned she never quite got around to filing to have those rights fully restored. She must have been busy, like she was when her kid was taken.

 

[athy]

i don't understand why JB thinks GK or his girlfriend could have done this because they owed money...how would that have gotten them the money they owed the person? it doesn't make sense.

 

[MIMOMMY]

InTexas - I just wanted to verify that at NO point did I say that being a product of her enviroment was an excuse for JB or anyone else involved to neglect Naveah --- or any parent and any child for that matter -- If you read my previous post I was QUESTIONING the grandmother and mothers decision making.....

*just to verify of course*

 

[nursebeeme]

http://mojo.channel955.com/cc-commo...449&STATION_ID=WKQIM-IP&TRACK=Nevaeh_Buchanan

four minutes into part three of the radio show the hosts are discussing that money owed aspect too, Athy

 

[kiki the parrot]

I haven't caught up but I want to respond to the above. While I understand the point that is being made, one thing is sticking in my craw. Everyone is acting as if JB was adjudicated to be unfit, and custody was taken away from her. This is not the case. GM was guardian simply bc JB was going to prison and for no other reason that I am aware of. GM still had custody, but that, I believe, was more a function of not having gone to the court to change custody back to JB. No one ever said that JB couldn't care for NB, be around NB, or anything of the sort. And her conviction for home invasion would not lead to that conclusion, either, as the crime has nothing to do with harming her.

Just because someone has committed a felony does not mean that their parental rights are terminated.

And something's stuck in my craw too... that this mother knowingly exposed her child to more than one RSO. GM was given custody and if JB wanted to re-establish guardianship or reverse that decision then she needed to first ACT like a fit parent --then seek the court's approval by taking appropriate steps. The court, and the law, certainly DO advocate that children be protected from predators and would never knowingly award custody, nor restore custody, to any person who acknowledged willfully endangering or putting them at risk. And the little matter of that home invasion, allegedly w Nevaeh in tow shows again not only extreme poor judgment but reckless disregard for the wellbeing of her child.

arrot:

 

[Scarlett]

And something's stuck in my craw too... that this mother knowingly exposed her child to more than one RSO. GM was given custody and if JB wanted to re-establish guardianship or reverse that decision then she needed to first ACT like a fit parent --then seek the court's approval by taking appropriate steps. The court, and the law, certainly DO advocate that children be protected from predators and would never knowingly award custody, nor restore custody, to any person who acknowledged willfully endangering or putting them at risk. And the little matter of that home invasion, allegedly w Nevaeh in tow shows not only extreme poor judgment but reckless disregard for the wellbeing of her child.

arrot:

My point was not whether she acted appropriately or even whether she was a good parent. I have seen it repeatedly asked whether CPS knew that she was with Nevaeh, or stated that GM had to make a choice to live without JB in her home...all of these comments are making the assumption that JB was not allowed to be around NB for some reason. That is not the case.

While I think that JB made some horrible choices, and she is by far not mother of the year, it doesn't do our purpose any good to confuse issues or muddle facts.

ETA: also making statements like "allegedly with N in tow"...again, that hasn't been proven. That is a rumor from MT. I am just trying to sift through what is real and what is talk. I am not interested in making judgments based on non facts and rumors.

 

[kiki the parrot]

My point was not whether she acted appropriately or even whether she was a good parent. I have seen it repeatedly asked whether CPS knew that she was with Nevaeh, or stated that GM had to make a choice to live without JB in her home...all of these comments are making the assumption that JB was not allowed to be around NB for some reason. That is not the case.

While I think that JB made some horrible choices, and she is by far not mother of the year, it doesn't do our purpose any good to confuse issues or muddle facts.

ETA: also making statements like "allegedly with N in tow"...again, that hasn't been proven. That is a rumor from MT. I am just trying to sift through what is real and what is talk. I am not interested in making judgments based on non facts and rumors.

And because you disagree doesn't mean I'm the least confused. There is no "rumor" to the fact the mother in question lost custody due to her imprisonment--and when finally able to be reunited w her daughter and make better choices made even poorer ones and ADMITTEDLY thought nothing of introducing at least one SO boyfriend to her CHILD. You seem focused on arguing a moot legalistic point, one I've never argued, which is the legal permissability of whether or not the mother herself was allowed to have contact based on those charges. I'm focused on the implications of the ensuing high-risk associations (nevermind negligent supervision) of that mother to which Nevaeh was further subjected while subsequently in her mother's care--which directly or indirectly may very well have cost Nevaeh her life.

arrot:

 

[not_my_kids]

I just want to see if I am clear on a point here.

I know that CPS was involved with Jennifer and Nevaeh, the way I have come to understand it from the reports is that CPS recommended removal and it didn't happen.

For those of you that don't know, The MI CPS system is pretty much as follows:
1. CPS is alerted to the possibility of abuse or neglect. IF the abuse is on very young kids or is reported by an anonymouse source, then they visit the child(ren) and parents and home, otherwise, they normally try to talk to the kids privately, usually at school.
2. If the worker decides that there is evidence proving abuse or neglect, they open a case. Once a case is opened, the worker can either decide to recommend either the child stay with the family and services be used to improve the parenting skills or the child(ren) be removed from the parent.
3. When removal is deemed to be the safest thing, there are two chioces. CPS either leaves the kid (s)in the home until they can get a judge to approve the removal, or they take the kids from the home with the judge's approval and schedule a hearing within the next 72 hours.

Step 3 is where the system apparently fell apart for Neveah, from everything I have heard her father say, it seems like CPS recommended removal and the judge disagreed. If that is the case, then CPS did their job and it was the judge that failed Nevaeh.

 

[nomoresorrow]

go nancy g!!!

 

[Scarlett]

And because you disagree doesn't mean I'm the least confused. There is no "rumor" to the fact the mother in question lost custody due to her imprisonment and when finally able to be reunited w her daughter and make better choices made even poorer ones and ADMITTEDLY thought nothing of introducing at least one SO boyfriend to her CHILD. You seem focused on arguing a moot legalistic point, one I've never argued, which is the legal permissability of whether or not the mother herself was allowed to have contact based on those charges. I'm focused on the IMPLICATIONS of the ensuing high-risk ASSOCIATIONS (nevermind negligent supervision) of that mother while Nevaeh was in her care which directly or indirectly may very well have cost Nevaeh her life.

Listen, I am not trying to pick a fight with you. If I misunderstood your post, I apologize. My understanding is based on the following portion of your post:

And it is ALL about choices. Even GM in this case made the CHOICE, in light of her daughter's own parenting unfitness, to accept guardianship thus assuming responsibility to protect and care for Nevaeh herself. No one forced GM to assume this role, and if she didn't feel she could do so if it meant denying her daughter housing; or do so w/out resorting to Nevaeh's mother as a caregiver;

This is not the first time in this thread or the previous threads on this topic that I have seen someone make the inference that JB couldn't be around NB. That is what I am getting from your post and, I admit, there have been several that have flat out asked "didn't CPS know she was with NB? Did anyone call CPS and tell them that JB was around NB? etc"

I am sorry if you don't like legalistic points of view. However,I think that a legalistic view is much more helpful than an overly emotional one. While I have many emotions about this case, I try very hard to separate those emotions when I am reviewing the facts of the case. And when I see something being misunderstood or repetitively mis-stated, I speak up. I am sorry that you are the one I chose to speak up with, as you are certainly not the first one to infer or state that JB couldn't be around NB.

I apolgize to all for the detour. I will stay on topic from now on.

I am trying to find the dang cord to hook my camera up to my laptop. I will get the pics loaded soon.

 

[Scarlett]

I just want to see if I am clear on a point here.

I know that CPS was involved with Jennifer and Nevaeh, the way I have come to understand it from the reports is that CPS recommended removal and it didn't happen.

For those of you that don't know, The MI CPS system is pretty much as follows:
1. CPS is alerted to the possibility of abuse or neglect. IF the abuse is on very young kids or is reported by an anonymouse source, then they visit the child(ren) and parents and home, otherwise, they normally try to talk to the kids privately, usually at school.
2. If the worker decides that there is evidence proving abuse or neglect, they open a case. Once a case is opened, the worker can either decide to recommend either the child stay with the family and services be used to improve the parenting skills or the child(ren) be removed from the parent.
3. When removal is deemed to be the safest thing, there are two chioces. CPS either leaves the kid (s)in the home until they can get a judge to approve the removal, or they take the kids from the home with the judge's approval and schedule a hearing within the next 72 hours.

Step 3 is where the system apparently fell apart for Neveah, from everything I have heard her father say, it seems like CPS recommended removal and the judge disagreed. If that is the case, then CPS did their job and it was the judge that failed Nevaeh.

I haven't heard the father say this. Was this on NG? Is there a link? Is there something definitive that states that CPS was involved? I haven't read that on any of the news sites. I vaguely remember a talking head on NG saying that, but then there was a reason that it made no sense at the time. I remember us discussing it here as it was happening. Was it on the night that her body was found? (just trying to jog my own memory).

 

[Fairfaux08]

Due to the fact that I haven't been on WS in a couple of days, I was unable to respond to Peliman's map on the previous thread. In addition to the other helpful markers, and for what it's worth, the Hi-Lite Market where it has been reported that the supposed "Busch" beer can was purchased, is located on the Northwest corner of Telegraph Rd (US-24) and Dunbar Rd. After a slight building renovation several years ago, it is a full service grocery store. However, it is really dinky in comparison to the other local mega stores like Kroger or Meijer.

I also took the liberty of pointing out another well traveled local route used to get out to South Custer (M-50) and North Custer by taking Dunbar Rd west to S. Raisinville Rd past the fairgrounds and crossing the River Raisin to North Custer Rd.

 

[kiki the parrot]

One of the things that originally drew me to WS's was that there were so many survivors here who not only broke cycles of abuse in their own life/children's life, they were passionate and outspoken about awareness & prevention of abuse in the life's of all children. I am proud as a survivor myself to be a part of that. Sadly I don't even share that connection with the other 4 individuals who were victimized by the same perpetrator(s) as myself over the course of thier childhood - my siblings. I am the one in five. I told the secrets and broke the silence. For that I changed my life and the life's of my children but it did not change the life's of my siblings who went onto deny, call me a liar, protect the abuser, subject their own children to the abuser and abuse their own children themselves. I have lived with a type of survivors guilt for many years because I was not able to bring my siblings along in the recovery/wellness process. I am in no way excusing JB's behavior here whatsoever but I can't help but think that I have met many other JB's in my life, including in my own family. Although I don't know the events surrounding JB's upbringing, I see an individual who is extremely detached. She lacks the ability to gage and assess danger because of that detachment. Research tells us that those abused as children are more likely to be victimized as adults - they are more likely to place themselves in dangerous situations without even recognizing the danger around them. This is part of the detachment. What may have served them well as a child in order to survive the unthinkable, ironically works against them as adults and it renders them incapible of protecting their own child(ren). The "mother's instinct" that many refer to is not instinctional to the detached mother. Instinctional to her is minimizing other's behavior, (it's not that bad) even, as an adult, crediting her abuse as "making her strong," thereby denying the negative affects that it had upon her and likewise with her child(ren), "Hey I survived it and it didn't hurt me, it only made me stronger, they'll survive it too." There are no inner red flags or alarm bells in a detached mother. This is the danger when abused children grow up and have children of their own - they may not abuse their own child directly but instead subject them to other's who will/do. We hear it and see it over and over again with woman/mothers. JB, in my opinion, is a classic case = "Daddy George." So while I feel blessed that I was not able to deny the truth about my abuse, I also take with me the awareness that 4 of my fellow victims were not able to accept that truth and in so doing, continued the cycle of abuse, directly and/or indirectly in the life's of their own children. It takes more than words such as, "When I have kids I'm never going to do to them what was done to me," it takes therapy to undo the years of disassociation and detachment behaviors that allowed one to survive but now endanger their life and more especially, the life of the child they bring into this world. In my opinion this is critical in preventing access to children by sex offenders!
JMOO

This case brings up alot of emotions for many of us here. Thank you for sharing, I'm very sorry that you and your siblings endured this :hug: And so grateful that you, at least have broken this cycle and overcome such a painful past. I'm a survivor of abuse myself, and am not w/out compassion nor understanding of this destructive cycle. Not everyone will escape what for many becomes a lifetime of bondage, shame and guilt. My point is simply that children in the meantime must still be protected. If that means removing children from the homes of those who were abused in the past whose judgment is still compromised as a result, until they can act as protectors to children, so be it. Unless or until a parent has been freed from those chains or capable as you put it of "instinctually" protecting their children, we have a responsibility to all children to intervene on their behalf. They deserve advocacy so they are not victimized, and must be placed in the care of those who can and will protect them.
:blowkiss:
arrot:

 

[nursebeeme]

fwiw, iirc the grandmother decided to go ahead and assume custody/apply for it before Jennifer was sentenced. This was per a media interview with the brother very early on in the case...

 

[Chilly Willy]

I understand your frustration, Scarlett. Much of what now gets stated as fact came from rumors posted at the Monroe Talks site. It's difficult at this point to determine what is and isn't fact.

 

[whisperOFwings]

I would compare this to a parent who does not use a car seat or safety belt for their child.They are in an accident for which the parent may or may not be responsible for.The child ends up thrown from the car and is critically injured.After suffering hours of poking and prodding in the hospital the child dies.Investigators determine that if the child had been buckled in she most likely would not have recieved ANY injuries.
Is the parent the victim? The parent was negligent and that led to the childs death.
JB knowingly exposed her child to dangerous people.She did not watch out for a 5 year old child....just let her go.She just let her go ..........

bolded by me.....
~~~She just let her go~~~ My god, the way you worded that, so eloquent. My heart is breaking, just so, so sad.

 

[amysmom]

Hi everyone!! I've been reading all the posts and can't say enough about all the links, information, and the batting around of ideas. Glad to be with all of you.

:Welcome-12-june:

Glad to have ya here! :Banane44: