Missouri Man Denied Adoption Because Of His Weight

[Jeana (DP)]

I'm sorry Jeana, but I don't see it your way....I look in my child's eyes and see all the losses they've faced and would not wish those losses on another child. I think this kid belongs with family, and even if this guy kicked it at an early age, the wife is able to care for him...He would still be with family. Yes, it would be hard on him at that point, but how much harder would it have been to be shuttled from foster home to foster home?

There's an adoption agency in the Chicago area that has turned families away who are obese. These are obese people who are half this guy's size, no medical issues, dr. signing off on their overall health. If you are standing in judgement, where do you draw the line?

If we had chosen this agency (and likely been refused), my son would be dead by now. He was 31/2 and 28 lbs when we brought him home and too weak to walk up a flight of stairs. There is no waiting line of parents for 31/2 year old boys in Russia...they line up for the infant girls. He would not have survived on the little they were feeding him for much longer.

Thank you for a post which promotes healthy discussion instead of just trying to stir the pot. Its posters like you who make it possible for us to discuss the facts without trying to be condescending and/or making a person with an opposing view feel like crap. You've got intelligence and your way of dealing with this issue would actually make people consider the other side, instead of just being argumentative. Good job!!!!

 

[twinkiesmom]

Thanks:blowkiss: Jeana.

 

[Tielbird]

http://www.kmov.com/topstories/stories/kmov_localnews_070907_obeseadoption.aecc5323.html
"A Missouri man who came to Dallas for gastric bypass surgery in a desperate effort to regain custody of his cousin's child has lost his appeal for a rehearing.
Gary Stocklaufer, who weighed about 500 pounds when he had the donated surgery last month at Renaissance Hospital in Dallas, said he and his wife, Cynthia, will continue to fight to adopt 5-month-old Max.
Mr. Stocklaufer believes the state discriminated against him because he is obese. Since the operation, he has lost 30 pounds and expects to lose more."

Ooh, kinda messy, this is my first try at posting an update from a news source...

 

[2sisters]

i am not sure what to think. Obesity is a ticking time bomb and can lead to premature death and serious health problems but so can smoking ( don't think I am bashing the smoking crowd here, I am 24 hours into quitting smoking so i undertand the addiction) Should smokers not be allowed children? Both of my parents have left me genetically predisposed to cancer and heart didsease, should I not have kids? Life is a gamble, some people have major health problems and don't know it so have them and they are managed. it doesn't mean you deserve a child any less.

 

[Peter Hamilton]

http://www.kmov.com/topstories/stories/kmov_localnews_070907_obeseadoption.aecc5323.html
"A Missouri man who came to Dallas for gastric bypass surgery in a desperate effort to regain custody of his cousin's child has lost his appeal for a rehearing.
Gary Stocklaufer, who weighed about 500 pounds when he had the donated surgery last month at Renaissance Hospital in Dallas, said he and his wife, Cynthia, will continue to fight to adopt 5-month-old Max.
Mr. Stocklaufer believes the state discriminated against him because he is obese. Since the operation, he has lost 30 pounds and expects to lose more."--

Ooh, kinda messy, this is my first try at posting an update from a news source...

--Well, I guess the judge isn't satisfied with his weight loss yet--Another year the guy should lose another 150 pounds or so--Then he might get the kid--Kudos to him for gettng this operation but he should have controlled his manic appetite in the first place

 

[Peter Hamilton]

i am not sure what to think. Obesity is a ticking time bomb and can lead to premature death and serious health problems but so can smoking ( don't think I am bashing the smoking crowd here, I am 24 hours into quitting smoking so i undertand the addiction) Should smokers not be allowed children? Both of my parents have left me genetically predisposed to cancer and heart didsease, should I not have kids? Life is a gamble, some people have major health problems and don't know it so have them and they are managed. it doesn't mean you deserve a child any less.

--2Sisters good luck on your quitting smoking! i know you can do it

 

[2sisters]

--2Sisters good luck on your quitting smoking! i know you can do it

It's hard but Ihave done it before, obviously unsuccessfully, but the first day is the hardest. tomorrow will be better and this time I need to find a better way to manage my stess and quit falling back on cigarettes and food. I guess htere are worse addictions though.
I think the surgery for this man and what seems to be devotion to weight loss shows he will be a good father. If he is a binge eater he won't be falling abck on food anymore. Someone i know who had the surgery could only eat 4oz at a time so you break the habit quickly I would think.

 

[Peter Hamilton]

yes, with just 4 oz at a time, he should have little trouble losing weight quickly and eventually the judge will be convinced of his weight-loss committment

 

[SewingDeb]

i am not sure what to think. Obesity is a ticking time bomb and can lead to premature death and serious health problems but so can smoking ( don't think I am bashing the smoking crowd here, I am 24 hours into quitting smoking so i undertand the addiction) Should smokers not be allowed children? Both of my parents have left me genetically predisposed to cancer and heart didsease, should I not have kids? Life is a gamble, some people have major health problems and don't know it so have them and they are managed. it doesn't mean you deserve a child any less.

You have good points but smoking is already a reason to lose custody in many divorces. I realize this is not a divorce but those kinds of things are factored in when deciding on what is in the best interests of the child.

 

[SewingDeb]

Judge awards baby’s custody to Independence couple

A Jackson County judge today granted custody of an infant boy to an Independence couple, resolving a dispute that received national media attention.

Circuit Judge John R. O’Malley ruled that the Gary and Cindy Stocklaufer should have custody of the 8-month-old child while seeking to adopt him.

The baby has been in the custody of another couple for 5 ½ months. They also were seeking to adopt him.

http://www.kansascity.com/news/breaking_news/story/433872.html

 

[White Rain]

Judge awards baby’s custody to Independence couple

A Jackson County judge today granted custody of an infant boy to an Independence couple, resolving a dispute that received national media attention.

Circuit Judge John R. O’Malley ruled that the Gary and Cindy Stocklaufer should have custody of the 8-month-old child while seeking to adopt him.

The baby has been in the custody of another couple for 5 ½ months. They also were seeking to adopt him.

http://www.kansascity.com/news/breaking_news/story/433872.html

So glad to hear this. I hope that baby grows up into a loving household...I am sure he will.
Congrats to the new parents!