GUILTY MO - Tyler Dasher, 1, Affton, 15 Nov 2011 - #2

[matou]

I can't believe this beautiful baby is gone. Horrible.

 

[AlmostGone]

From all the pictures and video it looks like he was such a precious little boy I wish his mother would have put him up for adoption if she didn't want to give up that part of her life and be a mother! So many families out there would have loved to have him

I wish this mother reached out to a social worker or another pro. That could of helped..Nothing wrong with it..I see one, lots of people see one..keeps me more balanced IMO

 

[Ronso]

Am I the only one having issues loading the last page of this thread?

 

[menmo]

Am I the only one having issues loading the last page of this thread?

I'm having the same problem!

 

[JeannaT]

For the last two days or so, there seems to be an "extra last page" that I can't load.

Typically that means there's not a last page. It's like a ghost.

 

[Bravo]

Blank pages usually are a result of posts that have been moved or removed.

 

[chastity]

Same hear everyone, I can't get past page 19. I didn't think every one quit posting at the same time.

 

[leanaí]

I don't care if someone has a "mental" illness, if you kill someone then you need to be treated the same as anyone else who kills. I personally do not think she had a mental illness, nor do I think she got frustrated when he wouldn't stop crying, I believe she just got bored with her son and was looking for a way to get rid of him but didn't think it thru properly. Perhaps his crying did set her off but not in a frustrated way, it just made her angry in general.

If I am not mistaken she stopped adding pictures Of Tyler to her facebook page when he was a certain age? I do not have a facebook page, nor do I ever want one, so I am unable to look at things on them that others can see.

She must have also been looking forward to getting rid of him on that vacation he was suppose to go on.

Edgar said Baby Tyler was supposed to leave Thursday with a friend to go out of town for a vacation to give Shelby a break. “A little time away from Tyler to have some fun and do what you want to do,” he said. “She could have waited two days,” Edgar said.

Maybe it's just me but my fun is being with my children and doing things that bring a smile to there face.

 

[cocomod]

I thought about baby Tyler yesterday. How sad for those that loved him and lost him this year to a selfish act by his mother. I still will never understand why he was naked. If she lost her temper, and killed him in a rage, AND she truly cared for him, how in the world could she have not dressed him?? Poor Tyler. R.I.P. :rose:

 

[LolaMoon08]

I agree. I also don't think smoking pot would cause anyone to kill a baby. I can however see a bunch of scared kids being deceptive for fear they will be busted for smoking a joint though.

And who knows if they "laced" the blunt? It could have been laced with any number of drugs. No, I don't think simple mary-jane would have caused SD to kill Tyler, but if there was another kind of drug inside the "blunt" then it could be an entirely different scenario.

Just putting it out there

 

[CarrieBean]

And who knows if they "laced" the blunt? It could have been laced with any number of drugs. No, I don't think simple mary-jane would have caused SD to kill Tyler, but if there was another kind of drug inside the "blunt" then it could be an entirely different scenario.

Just putting it out there

This crossed my mind at the beginning when it was said she was out partying that night. Wondering if it was possible someone dropped something in her drink. I know it happened to me when I was young. I never did figure out what or who...all I know is that I was really messed up and throwing up after 2 beer...not violent though.

If there were any signs, I would think the one to see them would be her Mother. If the signs were just impatience, I doubt her Mother would ever dream of this happening. I'd sure like to know more about baby Tyler's mother.

 

[Mimimom]

My first time posting here and I havent yet read all the rules or figured out how to quote, ect. SO I hope its ok that I just post like this for tonight.
Just wanted to say as a Grandma who has custody of her grandchild its Not such an easy thing to do to throw out your child and get custody. Legally its Very difficult to get custody unless there are clear signs of abuse. I was somewhat fortunate ( if u want to call it that, ) because my daughter literally just walked out on him one day after neglecting him for months, going out drinking, or staying up all night and not getting up for work. I yelled, bribed, tried to understand, took away her car, ect, ect NOTHING helped, actually first she took off with him, i tracked her down and Begged her to come back home with him, a few weeks later she told me she "needed a break for around 2-3 mths " I was like WHAT ? So l went to court after she left and wouldnt answer my calls and got emergency custody....eventually full custody as she never showed up. That was 3 yrs ago.
I have to say PPD or something but my daughter literally lost her mind, I couldnt Stop her from going out, from partying, and I sure couldnt force her to care for her child, and I tried everyway possible. Its a difficult position to be in, we want our children to grow up and take this responsiblilty seriously as it was HER choice to have this baby. She was 21 yrs old when she left, not a child. There was never a time when I allowed her to do something, she would go out for a bite to eat after work and never come home. She would tell me she had to work late, if I helped too much I felt like I enabled her and if I didnt help it was the baby that suffered........

 

[leanaí]

My first time posting here and I havent yet read all the rules or figured out how to quote, ect. SO I hope its ok that I just post like this for tonight.
Just wanted to say as a Grandma who has custody of her grandchild its Not such an easy thing to do to throw out your child and get custody. Legally its Very difficult to get custody unless there are clear signs of abuse. I was somewhat fortunate ( if u want to call it that, ) because my daughter literally just walked out on him one day after neglecting him for months, going out drinking, or staying up all night and not getting up for work. I yelled, bribed, tried to understand, took away her car, ect, ect NOTHING helped, actually first she took off with him, i tracked her down and Begged her to come back home with him, a few weeks later she told me she "needed a break for around 2-3 mths " I was like WHAT ? So l went to court after she left and wouldnt answer my calls and got emergency custody....eventually full custody as she never showed up. That was 3 yrs ago.
I have to say PPD or something but my daughter literally lost her mind, I couldnt Stop her from going out, from partying, and I sure couldnt force her to care for her child, and I tried everyway possible. Its a difficult position to be in, we want our children to grow up and take this responsiblilty seriously as it was HER choice to have this baby. She was 21 yrs old when she left, not a child. There was never a time when I allowed her to do something, she would go out for a bite to eat after work and never come home. She would tell me she had to work late, if I helped too much I felt like I enabled her and if I didnt help it was the baby that suffered........

You did all you could and it didn't help but at least you got custody of your Grandchild and I am so glad you did. It should be made easier for Grandparents to get custody of there Grandchildren. Trying to make someone be a parent when they don't want to be is just dangerous to the child, as we have started to see with recent cases. You can't force someone to be a parent, it's not right for the child, they deserve a parent who wants them. I wish they had it every where you can give your child up to a safe house at any age if you can't care for them anymore, no questions asked.


I think she was just tired of him getting in her way of having fun. She just started to resent him and he wasn't as fun any more. Her actions during the search for Tyler is what shows how she really felt. I do not believe she was on anything.

I would like to hear from the Grandma at some point and see how Tyler's life was like in her home.

Please sign this petition on change.org to charge her with 1st degree murder. Thank you.

 

[josie1986]

You did all you could and it didn't help but at least you got custody of your Grandchild and I am so glad you did. It should be made easier for Grandparents to get custody of there Grandchildren. Trying to make someone be a parent when they don't want to be is just dangerous to the child, as we have started to see with recent cases. You can't force someone to be a parent, it's not right for the child, they deserve a parent who wants them. I wish they had it every where you can give your child up to a safe house at any age if you can't care for them anymore, no questions asked.


I think she was just tired of him getting in her way of having fun. She just started to resent him and he wasn't as fun any more. Her actions during the search for Tyler is what shows how she really felt. I do not believe she was on anything.

I would like to hear from the Grandma at some point and see how Tyler's life was like in her home.

Please sign this petition on change.org to charge her with 1st degree murder. Thank you.

Signed it. She knew what she was doing and had the option to stop,(I'm assuming the first blow wasn't fatal) and Tyler would still be alive but she chose to keep going,that IMO is cold blooded.the way she acted in the following hours doesn't exactly show her being remorseful either. I'm all for an eye for an eye,she deserves to feel the pain this little guy did.

I'm still fuming about this.
Sent from my GT-I9100 using Tapatalk

 

[belimom]

My first time posting here and I havent yet read all the rules or figured out how to quote, ect. SO I hope its ok that I just post like this for tonight.
Just wanted to say as a Grandma who has custody of her grandchild its Not such an easy thing to do to throw out your child and get custody. Legally its Very difficult to get custody unless there are clear signs of abuse. I was somewhat fortunate ( if u want to call it that, ) because my daughter literally just walked out on him one day after neglecting him for months, going out drinking, or staying up all night and not getting up for work. I yelled, bribed, tried to understand, took away her car, ect, ect NOTHING helped, actually first she took off with him, i tracked her down and Begged her to come back home with him, a few weeks later she told me she "needed a break for around 2-3 mths " I was like WHAT ? So l went to court after she left and wouldnt answer my calls and got emergency custody....eventually full custody as she never showed up. That was 3 yrs ago.
I have to say PPD or something but my daughter literally lost her mind, I couldnt Stop her from going out, from partying, and I sure couldnt force her to care for her child, and I tried everyway possible. Its a difficult position to be in, we want our children to grow up and take this responsiblilty seriously as it was HER choice to have this baby. She was 21 yrs old when she left, not a child. There was never a time when I allowed her to do something, she would go out for a bite to eat after work and never come home. She would tell me she had to work late, if I helped too much I felt like I enabled her and if I didnt help it was the baby that suffered........

:welcome:

Welcome to WS and thanks for posting your experience - it does give a lot of insight to cases like this. Your grandson is very lucky to have you...

 

[momtective]

You did all you could and it didn't help but at least you got custody of your Grandchild and I am so glad you did. It should be made easier for Grandparents to get custody of there Grandchildren. Trying to make someone be a parent when they don't want to be is just dangerous to the child, as we have started to see with recent cases. You can't force someone to be a parent, it's not right for the child, they deserve a parent who wants them. I wish they had it every where you can give your child up to a safe house at any age if you can't care for them anymore, no questions asked.


I think she was just tired of him getting in her way of having fun. She just started to resent him and he wasn't as fun any more. Her actions during the search for Tyler is what shows how she really felt. I do not believe she was on anything.

I would like to hear from the Grandma at some point and see how Tyler's life was like in her home.

Please sign this petition on change.org to charge her with 1st degree murder. Thank you.

I took at look at the petition, haven't signed it yet because I would like to hear from some of our legal experts here at WS as to why the SA wouldn't choose to charge her with 1st degree murder. They have a body, they know the cause of death, the have an outright confession, why on earth would they not charge her with murder 1? Is there something else they need? After the Casey Anthony fiasco I think I'd rather them charge her with whatever charge will be the most likely to getherazz convicted.

Rest in Peace Tyler :rose:

 

[krimekat]

<Respectfully Snipped> why the SA wouldn't choose to charge her with 1st degree murder. They have a body, they know the cause of death, the have an outright confession, why on earth would they not charge her with murder 1? Is there something else they need? After the Casey Anthony fiasco I think I'd rather them charge her with whatever charge will be the most likely to getherazz convicted.

Rest in Peace Tyler :rose:

http://www.ksdk.com/news/article/286130/3/Shelby-Dasher-charged-with-murder-of-son-Tyler-Dasher

According to this article:

St. Louis County Prosecutor Bob McCulloch said . . .

[t]he evidence suggests there was not premeditation, which is why Dasher was charged with second-degree murder, McCulloch said. The difference between first-degree and second-degree murder charges is the difference between being "cold-blooded" or "hot-blooded," according to McCulloch.

There was no evidence of any abuse to the child prior to this incident.


MO Statutes for Murder (1st & 2nd degree)

http://www.moga.mo.gov/statutes/c500-599/5650000020.htm

http://www.moga.mo.gov/statutes/c500-599/5650000021.htm

 

[matou]

To Minimom: bless you for caring for your child and grandchild.

 

[Mimimom]

To Minimom: bless you for caring for your child and grandchild.

Thank You, it hasnt been easy, its not easy for Grandparents to take on another child at this point in their lives, I love my grandson, hes a sweetheart in everyway but I wanted to be his grandmother, not his mother. Its a big change in my life, my marriage, my family. Ive given up my job, my freedom, and its a life long commitment.....I cant say I did it willingly, i did it because I Felt I had no choice, ive never regretted it but often wished things were different, that my child would have raised her child...with my love and support. I had made it very clear to her that I would help but Not raise the child......she swore she understood, i didnt paint a rosy picture. But she got tired of the responsiblity and wanted to have fun and party, occasionally going out wasnt enough, I tried that, to give her time to have fun, go on dates, ect.....
While she didnt hurt him, l often wonder if I didnt step it what would have happened, I think she would have just left him somewhere.........I was never so confused and scared in my life for this baby. So precious they all are. I could not believe she just walked away, missed his first christmas and birthday although she was asked to come, actually begged to come. After about six months she visited now and then, and then she had another baby that I couldnt/wouldnt take.....he was put up for adoption. She went off partying again then moved across the country for 1 1/2 years. Shes been back for 6mos now and visits very often. The little guy doesnt know its his mom, not yet. Shes also pregnant again, little boy #3 will be here in 2 weeks.....and going to the same home his brother did. Breaks my heart but at least she is smart enough NOT to attempt to raise him, I was at the birth and will be again to be Sure she does whats best.
Just wanted to give some insight, and anyone that didnt live here would think she was a Great Mom. It was here that i saw her not get up, not dress or feed him properly, not have any real interest in him.....thankfully my hubby and eye spoiled him with love and attention whenever she was out. But we walked a very fine line fearful that she would leave with him and endanger him

 

[Mimimom]

You did all you could and it didn't help but at least you got custody of your Grandchild and I am so glad you did. It should be made easier for Grandparents to get custody of there Grandchildren. Trying to make someone be a parent when they don't want to be is just dangerous to the child, as we have started to see with recent cases. You can't force someone to be a parent, it's not right for the child, they deserve a parent who wants them. I wish they had it every where you can give your child up to a safe house at any age if you can't care for them anymore, no questions asked.

I agree, and while this was going on in my life was the fall of 2008, Casey Anthony was Very clearly on my mind.......
The think is I think these girls are ashamed or something to admit they cant handle it, or the idea of giving away their child is horrible to them......although leaving or killing them isnt an option either, I dont get it, still dont.

I think she was just tired of him getting in her way of having fun. She just started to resent him and he wasn't as fun any more. Her actions during the search for Tyler is what shows how she really felt. I do not believe she was on anything.

While my grandchild wasnt hurt physically , just abandoned, my daughter went about her life like nothing happened. She told her friends everything was fine at home, the baby was fine and I didnt mind her going out and watching him, ect, ect. None of them would have guessed what was going on at all. She moved along with her life like she had not a care in the world, boggled my mind how a Mother could do that......

I would like to hear from the Grandma at some point and see how Tyler's life was like in her home.

I can imagine her heart is broken, shes looking back and wondering if there was something she could have done. There were times I took off work to care for my grandson when my daughter was hungover bad....and there were other times I felt like Let her take care of him with that hangover and headache and MAYBe she will learn NOT to do that again, as moms we often learn how to pace ourselves so we have the energy to care for our children.....sadly some "moms' dont care, their needs come first. I saw it when my daughter would come home from school, the baby was in daycare there, and they would come in and she would sit and eat or change first, and leave him laying there hungry and wet.