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nana - I believe Peeples is correct about needing minimum posts before you are able to send/receive private msgs....seem to remember you need 50?
The easiest way to increase your post count is to head into the game forum....you can be up to 50 posts in no time flat!
P.s. Good luck to you!
It's great she has a good lawyer that will help more than anything anyone else can do
Up at the top right of the screen under your name is a thing that says "Your notifications". Click on that and you can send/receive private messages.
I cnanot remember if you need to have a minimum post number in order to use that feature though.