SC SC - Stanley Kotowski, 60, Hilton Head, 16 Aug 2024

[Orange And Purple]

Yeah, thank you for posting. The family received that footage *today*. I do not know why it took a week to obtain it, but before now all they had was the screenshot everyone else has seen. It turns out he was last seen walking in the opposite direction (to the Northeast) of where the investigators had been focusing (the South).

That said, apparently you can leave in the direction Stan was last seen walking in on the footage and still wrap around to head South, so who knows how helpful the footage actually is. (And the entire island has been looking for him, regardless of direction, so...)

Jackie also noted Stan does not own a personal cell phone, and he left his work phone in his home office in MA.

Appreciate all the out-of-the-box thinking on this thread, it's why I've been a long-time lurker of this forum. I do not believe rabies or animal bites are involved here. As for alligators, anything's possible at this point. It would be nice to have some answers, that's for sure. We're all so puzzled.

 

[kccorona]

It turns out he was last seen walking in the opposite direction (to the Northeast) of where the investigators had been focusing (the South).

Thank you for being here @Orange And Purple , it’s always nice to have those who know the family and missing involved in these discussion.
Re: the direction he was last seen going on the Ring video- I found it interesting that he seemed to walk from the front door and down the porch with a fairly clear purpose, although he didn’t look particularly rushed or stressed. But when he got to the street, his certainty really seemed to falter, and he almost seemed to walk in a small circle, slowly, before slowly walking out of view.
Seems like this may help focus the review of available surveillance footage, but now seeing how far the street was from the front door, I doubt that the majority of motion-activated Ring doorbell cameras (or similar brand devices) would pick up his motion if he stayed in the street where it appears he was walking. I know these have different settings but I don’t think many would pick up motion that far out from the front doors on a residential street.
Just my opinion and speculation based on my own personal doorbell camera.

 

[statt#1]

Their rental is/was at the extreme southern end of the Island. There's a marina rather close by, the Salty Dog cafe, otherwise pretty much residential. Their rental is rather close to the beach. There's really no way to go any further around that southern tip as the cove enters there. I've been there several times, on the beach, riding my bike. It's a dead end around there, and often a couple folks fishing. The whole area around there is pretty active with people moving about, walking, riding bikes, hanging out on the beach, etc.

I'm inclined to speculate he's either nearby in an unused, moored boat, or possibly lying in a concealed area among thick vegetation, but both these idea to me are hard to imagine given the immediate area and the number of folks that are normally out and about.

Possibly in a concealed location among trees at the edge of the dunes where the trees begin? A gator is unlikely as he'd most likely have been seen/heard, or at minimum, found. Possibly swept out to sea on currents? Walked in to the water never to be seen from again?

Maybe a boat ride to Daufuskie Island, which has lots of remote area to get lost in.

Lastly, it's possible to enter and leave Sea Pines without going through the main gates, but it's difficult to do so. He may have hitched a ride out of there? But if that were the case, the person driving him out would likely come forward, unless of course, they were unaware he is missing.

Search continues for missing tourist on Hilton Head Island in South Carolina

Stanley Kotowski, 60, was last seen August 16 leaving the family's vacation home at the Sea Pines Resort.

www.wyff4.com

 

[Arkay]

I’ve just noticed this case and am trying to catch up.

I’m not very familiar with HHI and have nothing to offer but my prayers for a happy resolution, with Stan found safely and soon.

I feel the dagger through the heart of the family. I understand Stan does not have dementia but is enduring a mental health crisis. My mom is older than Stan and does have dementia—-she’s in Florida and was a middle of the night wanderer until we just recently had to put her in memory care.
We were always petrified of her falling into the lakes in her gated community because of the many alligators in Florida.

I grasp that Stan’s situation is different, but my heart aches and breaks for this very loving and involved family.

Thank you, @RedAndBlue and @Orange And Purple for your efforts to inform us about your relative Stan.

Prayers for Jackie and their sons. God willing he is found safe. A week is too long.

 

[mlhenn]

Re: the direction he was last seen going on the Ring video- I found it interesting that he seemed to walk from the front door and down the porch with a fairly clear purpose, although he didn’t look particularly rushed or stressed. But when he got to the street, his certainty really seemed to falter, and he almost seemed to walk in a small circle, slowly, before slowly walking out of view.

I agree. He seems focused & knowing where he wants to go (out the door, down the walkway in the front)…but when he gets to the street (close to the vehicle) he seems confused to where he wants to go next…like he needs to think about what the next step to his “plan/journey” should be.

JMO

 

[PommyMommy]

AUG 24, 2024

Family of man missing on Hilton Head Island desperate for answers

Stanley Kotowski has been missing for eight days

www.wjcl.com

[...]

"The only evidence we have for sure is the clip from the security camera on this unit of him walking out the door that day and heading across the street to the Bay Villas lagoon," Jackie Kotowski, Stanley’s wife, told WJCL 22. "We just need them to find something we need. We need a clue. We need a hand. We need something."

[...]

So far, there’s been no answers. Stanley’s wife said his mental distress and anxiety are all new.

"His anxiety kept ramping up, which was a brand new thing. Like that was just last week," said Jackie Kotowski. "We've been married for 32 years, and he's never been like this.”

[...]

The family is asking anyone who owns vacant property on Hilton Head to have their homes searched by Beaufort deputies.

[...]

 

[vls12345]

Is it too late for sniffer dogs to be effective?

 

[Colorado303]

What would you do if you were on vacation in an unfamiliar place and sure people were out harm you? I would try to get the heck out of dodge as quickly as possible. And if I’d placed my family in danger I wouldn’t contact them. Nor would I if I thought they might be part of the plot.

If I had a day to plan ahead, I might grab cash out of someone’s purse or wallet, buy a burner phone and stash shoes someplace nearby. But if I thought someone I was staying with was part of the danger, I might walk outside with absolutely nothing if I felt an immediate threat or wanted to avoid their suspicion.

To get away I might opportunistically swipe a scooter, golf cart, boat or jet-ski. But most likely I would talk my way into someone’s car w/an excuse about losing my wallet/phone/shoes and have them drive me somewhere. Somebody swiped my stuff at the beach. Angry spouse drove off with all my stuff. Bachelor party buddies thought it would be hysterical to pack up and head for home while I was sleeping on the couch. I’m on one of those reality shows where you’re beimg chased by “finders” and have to stay hidden to win the money. Whatever I thought might work w/whomever I ran into. At that point I wouldn’t care where they were headed. Anywhere would be fine. I’d just want to get out of there unseen. Maybe ask if I could borrow some money and reimburse it when I was reunited w/my possessions.

Once I felt I’d escaped imminent danger I could be more intentional about where to head next. I wouldn’t go anyplace people would expect to find me or contact any of my current friends. But there are a handful of old ones I haven’t talked to since school days that I trust and might reach out to in a pinch. Some of whom I’ve had no reason to even mention to my spouse.

There are also a few places I’ve visited over the years where I have no ties that I might head to if I had to go someplace new. (Ironically, Hilton Head would be one of those places).

With that in mind, it may be worth reaching out to Stanley’s old friends from high school, camp, sport teams, college or an early job. Ex-girlfriends too. Contact authorities in his hometown, college town and favorite vacation spots. And ask HHI locals to contact anyone visiting from out of town who left by car the within 48 hours of Stanley going missing. He may have bummed a ride and they have no idea he’s been reported missing.

My heart goes out to his family and to Stanley himself. How terrifying for them all! Prayers he is found safe and very soon.

 

[statt#1]

"Promise me you will go on without me."

This statement clearly leads me to wonder if he was suicidal. An alternative to that notion though would be that his intent was to make a planned exodus from his current life situation.

So, it's entirely possible that SK made arrangements to, or made an impromptu decision, to depart the Sea Pines area. He did indicate he felt the people there were out to get him. He may have been extremely motivated to leave, and it therefore not even in the Hilton Head region. As to how that would be accomplished is totally open to speculation on my part. Maybe a little cash in pocket, buy some flip flops, hitch a ride. I'd think it would be a difficult task though, without phone, ID, wallet, change of clothes, etc.....unless it was planned way in advance.

Missing Hilton Head Vacationer: What we know 7 days after the disappearance of Stanley Kotowski

Stanley Kotowski, 60, was last seen August 16 leaving the family's vacation home at the Sea Pines Resort.

www.wjcl.com

 

[mlhenn]

Family of man missing on Hilton Head Island desperate for answers

Stanley Kotowski has been missing for eight days

www.wjcl.com

WJCL 22 spoke exclusively with the Kotowski family Saturday about what they think could be the key to locating Stanley.

"The only evidence we have for sure is the clip from the security camera on this unit of him walking out the door that day and heading across the street to the Bay Villas lagoon," Jackie Kotowski, Stanley’s wife, told WJCL 22. "We just need them to find something we need. We need a clue. We need a hand. We need something."

"His anxiety kept ramping up, which was a brand new thing. Like that was just last week," said Jackie Kotowski. "We've been married for 32 years, and he's never been like this.”

"We need to get an actual search party going, and we need to go through all these places. There's like 6,000 units,” said Ryan Kotowski.

 

[Simply Southern]

What would you do if you were on vacation in an unfamiliar place and sure people were out harm you? I would try to get the heck out of dodge as quickly as possible. And if I’d placed my family in danger I wouldn’t contact them. Nor would I if I thought they might be part of the plot.

If I had a day to plan ahead, I might grab cash out of someone’s purse or wallet, buy a burner phone and stash shoes someplace nearby. But if I thought someone I was staying with was part of the danger, I might walk outside with absolutely nothing if I felt an immediate threat or wanted to avoid their suspicion.

To get away I might opportunistically swipe a scooter, golf cart, boat or jet-ski. But most likely I would talk my way into someone’s car w/an excuse about losing my wallet/phone/shoes and have them drive me somewhere. Somebody swiped my stuff at the beach. Angry spouse drove off with all my stuff. Bachelor party buddies thought it would be hysterical to pack up and head for home while I was sleeping on the couch. I’m on one of those reality shows where you’re beimg chased by “finders” and have to stay hidden to win the money. Whatever I thought might work w/whomever I ran into. At that point I wouldn’t care where they were headed. Anywhere would be fine. I’d just want to get out of there unseen. Maybe ask if I could borrow some money and reimburse it when I was reunited w/my possessions.

Once I felt I’d escaped imminent danger I could be more intentional about where to head next. I wouldn’t go anyplace people would expect to find me or contact any of my current friends. But there are a handful of old ones I haven’t talked to since school days that I trust and might reach out to in a pinch. Some of whom I’ve had no reason to even mention to my spouse.

There are also a few places I’ve visited over the years where I have no ties that I might head to if I had to go someplace new. (Ironically, Hilton Head would be one of those places).

With that in mind, it may be worth reaching out to Stanley’s old friends from high school, camp, sport teams, college or an early job. Ex-girlfriends too. Contact authorities in his hometown, college town and favorite vacation spots. And ask HHI locals to contact anyone visiting from out of town who left by car the within 48 hours of Stanley going missing. He may have bummed a ride and they have no idea he’s been reported missing.

My heart goes out to his family and to Stanley himself. How terrifying for them all! Prayers he is found safe and very soon.

I originally thought he would be on the island staying at an unoccupied home. Most of the homes if not all on HH have security systems and would alarm if windows or doors are broken. There are some that do hide a key on the property, especially rentals, usually in an electric box, somewhere near a deck or patio, using a key would NOT trip an alarm. (I have a vacation home, up the road from HH and we have two hidden keys)
As to searching all the homes...folks in the south are reluctant to open their doors for searches. We've seen this in many missing children cases.

I agree, Stan is not on HH. I think he left the island quickly, given his thoughts of "they are out to get me". I would head inland and look for "day work".... landscape, odd jobs, farm work (this is a heavy agricultural area inland)..these pay cash at the end of the day and no one cares about your past or present. Food and clothing fairly easy to obtain, folks leave shoes and clothing outside, hanging on a makeshift line or porch, dumpster diving for food, lots farms, walk right up and eat all you want at night. Lots of free meals at churches, feeding the homeless. It would be easy to in bed in a homeless camp/group.
Focus on the underworld ... folks who don't care about your past, don't have access to the news, live on a day by day basis.

Some thoughts on what would I do....
Design flyer, photos of Stan and various situations and clothing... if he had a beard, long pants, etc. Include all skills/interest he has, area he maybe drawn to. (He will rely on skills to survive) Is he physically fit, any weakness that he may have (bad back/vision), physical scars.
Focus on Stan, not how he disappeared.

Stan is now homeless, focus on where the homeless go.

Email distributions
•All surrounding mental health agencies, a mental health worker may have spotted him with one of their clients or at a food bank or homeless shelter.
•Hospitals administration asking to post in their emergency room.
•Small mom and pop businesses ... they can and do pay cash under the table.
•Farms and local farmers, this time of year they don't have time or care to watch the news. Very active time harvesting crops, daily.
•Food banks, free meal sites
•All vacation rental agencies
•Bus stations ...far and wide
•Grocery stores (Walmart has a wall of Missing Person poster)

Facebook
Set up new account ...
Stan missing
•Join every local, far and wide groups ...all the local areas have marketplace, local what's happening, churches, history, private vacation rental sites etc. Post "Be on lookout"
•Stans "old" friends
•TV, radio pages

Misc..
•Look at TV FB pages for a reporter who might do a feature story, live interviews with family, show lots of various photos, focus on Stans habits, skills, features. Getting local reports involved ....free advertising and most have lots of followers.
•Hit up the national news site, so far only one has covered the story


•Fund billboards surrounding area (do a go f und me, if needed)
•I would reach out up the coast, especially Myrtle Beach. MB has a large homeless/underground network, lots of cash work opportunities, easy to steal clothing and food from campsites, lots of transience folks.

HH law enforcement can only do so much and as time passes, less and less and crime will take priority.


All my opinion and being very familiar went South Carolina North Carolina inland and coastal area for over 50 years.

@RedAndBlue
@Orange And Purple

 

[kccorona]

"Promise me you will go on without me."

This statement has stuck in my my mind throughout the entire course of reading this thread and related articles. I am curious about the specific timing of him saying this to his wife. She is quoted as saying he said it to her “before he left” but I wonder if it was as he was walking out the door, said earlier in the morning and brushed off nonchalantly (based on his recent state of mind), or something he’d been saying variations of for last several days.

I can’t recall now, but was this the first time he’d left or even attempted to leave their vacation rental since their arrival? And had he been out with his wife or family on any walks around the community prior to the date of disappearance ?

Just questions floating around my head.

 

[KMouse]

This statement has stuck in my my mind throughout the entire course of reading this thread and related articles. I am curious about the specific timing of him saying this to his wife. She is quoted as saying he said it to her “before he left” but I wonder if it was as he was walking out the door, said earlier in the morning and brushed off nonchalantly (based on his recent state of mind), or something he’d been saying variations of for last several days.

I can’t recall now, but was this the first time he’d left or even attempted to leave their vacation rental since their arrival? And had he been out with his wife or family on any walks around the community prior to the date of disappearance ?

Just questions floating around my head.

I agree. She didn't question what the context was?

 

[kccorona]

I agree. She didn't question what the context was?

My thought was moreso regarding the timing of him saying this, as in did he say it right before walking out the door?

And, I’m speculating it’s possible that statements of this nature were something he had been saying frequently, as it seems to be in line with his current state of mind. If that is the case, I would guess it’s likely it was heard by family in a manner that would not have been so alarming, or, at least not in the context of his paranoia and anxieties.

 

[Simply Southern]

Does Stan hunt, fish?
Does he have camping/hiking experience even in younger years?
Was he in the military or National Guard, Boy Scouts?
(Several college friends with the above experience and I, spend 4 days in a SC National Park, with only sleeping bags. We forged all our food and water, without any tools or conveniences. Wouldn't want to but I could do it again and survive)
Hobbies, interests, clubs .... what skills required?

He may be hidden in a home on Hilton Head, but those homes are very secure and he knows people are looking for him. I think it more likely if he is in a vacant structure, it would be a less secured area, with walk-up beach access, possibly older or very large campgrounds with permanent sites/travel trailers (easy to break into and usually no security cameras), not the resort camping areas.

Moo...
@RedAndBlue @Orange And Purple

 

[Inthedetails]

What would you do if you were on vacation in an unfamiliar place and sure people were out harm you? I would try to get the heck out of dodge as quickly as possible. And if I’d placed my family in danger I wouldn’t contact them. Nor would I if I thought they might be part of the plot.

If I had a day to plan ahead, I might grab cash out of someone’s purse or wallet, buy a burner phone and stash shoes someplace nearby. But if I thought someone I was staying with was part of the danger, I might walk outside with absolutely nothing if I felt an immediate threat or wanted to avoid their suspicion.

To get away I might opportunistically swipe a scooter, golf cart, boat or jet-ski. But most likely I would talk my way into someone’s car w/an excuse about losing my wallet/phone/shoes and have them drive me somewhere. Somebody swiped my stuff at the beach. Angry spouse drove off with all my stuff. Bachelor party buddies thought it would be hysterical to pack up and head for home while I was sleeping on the couch. I’m on one of those reality shows where you’re beimg chased by “finders” and have to stay hidden to win the money. Whatever I thought might work w/whomever I ran into. At that point I wouldn’t care where they were headed. Anywhere would be fine. I’d just want to get out of there unseen. Maybe ask if I could borrow some money and reimburse it when I was reunited w/my possessions.

Once I felt I’d escaped imminent danger I could be more intentional about where to head next. I wouldn’t go anyplace people would expect to find me or contact any of my current friends. But there are a handful of old ones I haven’t talked to since school days that I trust and might reach out to in a pinch. Some of whom I’ve had no reason to even mention to my spouse.

There are also a few places I’ve visited over the years where I have no ties that I might head to if I had to go someplace new. (Ironically, Hilton Head would be one of those places).

With that in mind, it may be worth reaching out to Stanley’s old friends from high school, camp, sport teams, college or an early job. Ex-girlfriends too. Contact authorities in his hometown, college town and favorite vacation spots. And ask HHI locals to contact anyone visiting from out of town who left by car the within 48 hours of Stanley going missing. He may have bummed a ride and they have no idea he’s been reported missing.

My heart goes out to his family and to Stanley himself. How terrifying for them all! Prayers he is found safe and very soon.

If paranoid, you might want to flee, that's true, but I can also envision someone with mental distress being resolved and think, "I'm going to go out MY way, not yours, and I'm going to protect my family." I'm worried about self-harm, tbh.

Whatever the case, I'm thinking of Stanley and the family throughout all of this and hope for the best outcome possible.

jmo

 

[NoeticSoul]

I agree. She didn't question what the context was?

Knowing in what context or when Stan said this would be helpful for sure. He could have just meant the trip/vacation itself.. to 'go on without him'.. and no suicidal inclinations meant at all.

moo

 

[GraceG]

I hesitate to bring this up since it's a little extreme. The aversion to water made me think of it.
Was Stanley bitten by an animal sometime in the past while? Symptoms of the onset of rabies include anxiety, insomnia, agitation, hallucinations (paranoia?), confusion, hydrophobia..
Also "Rabies symptoms appear when the rabies virus reaches the brain or spinal cord, usually 30 to 50 days after a person is bitten. However, this interval can vary from 10 days to more than a year."
Rabies.

Agree with the above though, in that it only matters that he was having issues, not why.
So so hope he is found, and treated for whatever happened... it's been a week.

eta...not so terribly uncommon. have two friends who were infected, though fortunately treated in time.

Unlikely yes, but you can't rule anything out. Certainly, you can’t rule that out not knowing his full medical/psychological history. Unfortunately, once rabies symptoms manifest themselves, not just the initial infection, it’s pretty much100% fatal (I think there is just one case of a teen who was put into a medically induced coma who survived). The rabies virus affects the Central Nervous System (essentially Brain and Spinal cord) The movement of the virus from Peripheral Nervous System to Central Nervous System is where the infection changes into a disease and symptoms appear. The brain, not being “scanned” by cells of the immune system like other parts of the body means any antibodies formed will not reach there in time, so you can’t rely on natural immune response. By the time antibodies are formed, the virus has won - symptoms aggravate, and death will be the result, even with medical intervention at that point.

 

[mmu]

An earlier post pointed out how easily he could have gotten rides and distanced himself from HHI quite a bit. I assume the family has someone keeping an eye on their home? If that is somewhere he felt safe perhaps he would be trying to head that way.

 

[aimeea]

An earlier post pointed out how easily he could have gotten rides and distanced himself from HHI quite a bit. I assume the family has someone keeping an eye on their home? If that is somewhere he felt safe perhaps he would be trying to head that way.

Has it been said what level of security there is with the gates in the community? Sometimes in these gated communities, the gate is code-operated and giving--say, a Lyft or Uber driver the code to come isn't unthinkable. The way he was standing outside kind of reminds me of how I look on our Nest cam when I'm waiting for a pickup... go outside thinking the driver is there and walking very assertively and see they're not there, and then kind of looking around like "where are they?"