Terri Broke Up Marriage

[Emeralgem]

I agree, Kaine is certainly paying dearly for whatever his past misdeeds may have been. And I think that as far as Desiree goes, she has probably always known what Terri is, and I am not just speaking of the alleged affair here. Woman tend to be pretty intuitive, and I think that Desiree had Terri pegged all along, but no way in a million years could she have imagined this outcome. :twocents:

I totally agree...DY even stated in an interview she just couldn't believe he would choose someone like TMH over her and the baby.. JMO

One thing for certain I suspect Kaine wishes he had never laid eyes on TMH or heard the name Terri Moulton...JMO

 

[txsvicki]

I thought I read somewhere that Kaine had corrected himself and admitted that his marriage to Desiree really was not crumbling when he took up with Terri. However it was, he and Terri were very wrong. He was cheating and could have waited until his baby was born. Some women definitely do target men and try to take them, but we don't know what Kaine was telling Terri. Some men say that they aren't sleeping with their wife, they're separated, getting a divorce, etc. Whatever happened, according to Desiree, she seemed blindsided by it, was devastated, and couldn't understand why. Terri got Desiree's husband and her son. Hope she gets her son back full time to live with her and her good looking husband.

 

[jadejazzkayla]

Can we tone down the anti-Kaine sentiment here? I feel like some people are stopping just short of saying "he got what he deserved" when discussing the cheating on a pregnant woman. Yes, he's had bad behavior in the past. That in NO WAY justifies the blow he's been dealt with the loss of his son. He is a victim, too.

the timeframe of this thread is 2003. Kaine was just about to become a father to his beautiful baby boy. He was NOT a victim He made his choice.

 

[LillyRush]

A week or so ago I asked the question, on another thread, concerning who made the original claim to the media that DY and TH had been friends. I can't remember which thread it was in order to share a link, but other WS members presented me with two articles. One was with Terri's mother stating that claim and another where Kaine's (ex) sister in law was expressing that same sentiment about TH supposedly being DY's friend that took over when she was sick. So, apparently, it was not just people on Terri's side of the family or friends that were led to believe that but Kaine's side as well. And, as I said before when I learned that information, that should speak to not just Terri's but Kaine's character as well that he was willing to mislead people (his own family) like that.

 

[debs]

hard to imagine how Terri was such a complete siren that she managed to cause Kaine to lose responsibility for his own actions and marriage vows. I have always taught my children that when you do something wrong, it doesn't matter if someone else wanted you to do it. It's when you yourself cross the line that the entire responsibility for how it messes up your life is on you.

 

[STEADFAST]

A week or so ago I asked the question, on another thread, concerning who made the original claim to the media that DY and TH had been friends. I can't remember which thread it was in order to share a link, but other WS members presented me with two articles. One was with Terri's mother stating that claim and another where Kaine's (ex) sister in law was expressing that same sentiment about TH supposedly being DY's friend that took over when she was sick. So, apparently, it was not just people on Terri's side of the family or friends that were led to believe that but Kaine's side as well. And, as I said before when I learned that information, that should speak to not just Terri's but Kaine's character as well that he was willing to mislead people (his own family) like that.

The problem with the article was that there was no one from Desiree's side.

I'd also like to point out again that Desiree this article does not have anything in it about Desiree blaming Terri for her divorce. Only the headline says that.

 

[stmarysmead]

A week or so ago I asked the question, on another thread, concerning who made the original claim to the media that DY and TH had been friends. I can't remember which thread it was in order to share a link, but other WS members presented me with two articles. One was with Terri's mother stating that claim and another where Kaine's (ex) sister in law was expressing that same sentiment about TH supposedly being DY's friend that took over when she was sick. So, apparently, it was not just people on Terri's side of the family or friends that were led to believe that but Kaine's side as well. And, as I said before when I learned that information, that should speak to not just Terri's but Kaine's character as well that he was willing to mislead people (his own family) like that.

Thank you. I am very curious about this.

So if I'm understanding correctly, both Terri and Kaine's family were told essentially a cover story...that Terri was living in the house as Desiree's devoted friend...not Kaine's girlfriend who was party to breaking up his marriage.

So both of them had an interest in looking respectable. And to do so, the "victim" of their affair, a woman with a potentially fatal illness...was essentially USED.

Terri became to her new super-wonderful friend...the fabulous self-sacrificing friend...,just helping out. So noble.

They essentially lived a lie to family and friends.

Take what you want...do what you want...then invent a lie after life is how you want it.

Without Desiree...without Kyron...if it had been possible, without Kaine....

Sounds like a pattern.

 

[cluciano63]

IIRC, Kaine's former sister-in-law also was on the bandwagon with the Terri coming to the rescue story to some degree, so to me that says that Terri was not the only one telling that version.

It matters only if it goes to motive; if Terri felt that Kaine was doing to her what he did to Desiree with her. Lots of second wives of men who have cheated don't seem to think it could happen to them too. If she started thinking this about the time she was in her "funk", it could have affected her mid and judgement more than it may have at another, more stable time.

 

[LillyRush]

The problem with the article was that there was no one from Desiree's side.

I'd also like to point out again that Desiree this article does not have anything in it about Desiree blaming Terri for her divorce. Only the headline says that.

I know, I'm sure DY saw it differently and I'm not at all saying that her version of how it happened is wrong and they are right. My point is that the story about TH supposedly having been DY's friend that came in to "help" serves both Kaine and Terri by placing them in a better light among their family and friends regarding how they met. Now, however, in some interviews it is being made to sound like Terri was the only one who perpetuated that lie and I'm sorry but I don't believe that she was the only one who stood to benefit from that story. I believe Kaine also led many people to believe that story too.

I do appreciate you clarifying, since I have limited time to read this new article, that the current headline is more sensational than the actual text of the story and DY never specifically blames TH.

 

[stmarysmead]

I didn't see anywhere in the story that quoted Desiree as saying that Terri broke up her marriage or even any place that paraphrased her saying that. It's the headline writer who is making that interpretation of the events.

Also, this story is a summary of part of the Dateline interview, not a new interview.

This is in the article.

"Desiree said she was eight months pregnant with Kyron when she learned that Kaine was having an affair with Terri and it tore her apart.

"I cried solid for two months and didn't leave the bedroom because I didn't understand why she somehow equated to something that was better than me and my son,” Desiree said."

 

[21merc7]

It takes two to tango. Whomever chooses whomever over whomever and whatever is the problem. 2 still had to choose, and Kaine chose Terri or they would not have been married. DY got the shaft when she was at her lowest and that hurts, sucks, and you name it. Kaine was married and could have stayed home. However, he managed to get all he wanted while DY lost everything and cried her eyes out. All made choices.

 

[tiredblondy]

This is in the article.

"Desiree said she was eight months pregnant with Kyron when she learned that Kaine was having an affair with Terri and it tore her apart.

"I cried solid for two months and didn't leave the bedroom because I didn't understand why she somehow equated to something that was better than me and my son,” Desiree said."

Yep, been there done that. That's exactly the way I felt.Betrayed.

What is so horrible for me is that Kyron is suffering possibly because of those choices!!

To suffer consequences oneself for one''s own actions is one thing but an innocent child!!!

 

[STEADFAST]

This is in the article.

"Desiree said she was eight months pregnant with Kyron when she learned that Kaine was having an affair with Terri and it tore her apart.

"I cried solid for two months and didn't leave the bedroom because I didn't understand why she somehow equated to something that was better than me and my son,” Desiree said."

But what I'm saying is that she's not blaming Terri here as opposed to Kaine. Everyone keeps saying 'why does she blame Terri instead of Kaine?' and I just don't see where she's doing that.

 

[oceanblueeyes]

Great post. Desiree does have an older son, though. So Kyron is not her only child.

What I wanted to say was that the fact that Terri spread a story her moving in and helping with baby cements to be me that she knew exactly what she was doing and didn't want to look bad for what she had done. I'm not saying Kaine isn't to blame, but she was an older woman already twice divorced and had affairs before him. He was younger than her and an older, hot woman was probably alluring to him at a time when a marriage was going down the tubes with a baby on the way. Terri knew she could get him if she wanted him, and that's what she did. Some women don't care who they hurt as long as they get what they want. And many, many men are stupid enough to go along with them because they think too much with their other brain rather than realize what an idiot they are being in the first place. And what can the odd woman out really do when the man decides to be stupid and the other woman sinks her claws in deep enough that she gets what she wants?

I'm sure the both of them have a lot of regrets about what happened. But they can't change it no matter how much they want to. I swear, I wish men were psychic enough to see the craziness of a woman before they destroy relationships to be with them, and less women would choose to destroy people lives just to get what they want. There are plenty of single fish out there, why is it that they have to go after the already married ones? Of course, if the already married ones would say no more, that would help too.

What a sad situation, and how horrible that Desiree and Kaine keep blaming themselves. My heart truly aches for them. In the end, it doesn't matter who did what to who because Kyron is still missing in all of this.

Imo, it isn't just a man thing. I have seen women walkout on their husbands and children to chase that greener pasture (so they thought). So some women don't think with their brains either but with another part of their anatomy.

Oh I don't think Terri had to lure Kaine. One doesnt have to lure a willing participant. Desiree had been married once before too when she married Kaine so I dont think Terri's prior marriages had anything to do with it. Terri wasn't that much older than he was anyway. There is just a three-four year difference in age. Imo, he cheated because that is what he wanted to do.

I wouldn't be surprised if Kaine told Terri his marriage was on the rocks when he first met her. That seems to be an old standard by line when married people cheat.

I totally blame the cheater and imo the cheater is the one that is married and made a vow to their spouse to forsake all others. They are the ones that broke those vows. Whether it be a woman breaking them or a man who has done so. I have never believed that someone can take someone's spouse away. One cannot lose what they did not have in the first place.

I think Terri moved in with Kaine because that is exactly where he wanted her. And yes I am sure he is riddled with guilt now.

IMO

 

[sorrell skye]

My heart goes out to Desiree as the mother of Kyron but I really don't believe someone can steal a spouse away if they really don't want to cheat.

Imo, she should be blaming Kaine solely for he is the one that broke his wedding vows and Terri couldn't have gotten to first base if Kaine didn't want to play ball in the first place.

IMO

ITA Ocean. I have been with my partner for over 16 years (the one I playfully refer to as the Boy Toy because he's 12 years younger than I am :woohoo and during the course of our relationship, there have been numerous females smitten with him and a few who tried to lasso him. I don't blame them completely, though - he is a cutie. Most of the time I've laughed it off, cuz I know he likes my home cookin' better than take-out lol.

Ultimately, everyone has a choice & everyone in relationship is faced with the crossroads of decision. It goes without saying that long-term relationships are tough. In the beginning, lust is often confused for love. Ah - the endorphins! Ya gotta love 'em!

Commitment is an agreement between two people. It only works if both parties (not one or the other) take it seriously - simultaneously, despite the waxing & waning of the delirious effects of the hormones of wanderlust.

I admire elderly couples who have weathered the storms of a lifetime commitment. They have learned to cultivate a partnership based on companionship, trust, forgiveness of faults & foibles, willingness to recognize & correct their own shortcomings to the best of their ability, admiration of the good in one another, and respect for one another. Not to mention that humility & a good sense of humor goes a long long way!

And I agree with the opinion that no one can "steal" a spouse or partner.

Husbands & wives are not inanimate objects laying about on the foyer table next to the pocket-change bowl.

 

[Jaxson]

ITA Ocean. I have been with my partner for over 16 years (the one I playfully refer to as the Boy Toy because he's 12 years younger than I am :woohoo and during the course of our relationship, there have been numerous females smitten with him and a few who tried to lasso him. I don't blame them completely, though - he is a cutie. Most of the time I've laughed it off, cuz I know he likes my home cookin' better than take-out lol.

Ultimately, everyone has a choice & everyone in relationship is faced with the crossroads of decision. It goes without saying that long-term relationships are tough. In the beginning, lust is often confused for love. Ah - the endorphins! Ya gotta love 'em!

Commitment is an agreement between two people. It only works if both parties (not one or the other) take it seriously - simultaneously, despite the waxing & waning of the delirious effects of the hormones of wanderlust.

I admire elderly couples who have weathered the storms of a lifetime commitment. They have learned to cultivate a partnership based on companionship, trust, forgiveness of faults & foibles, willingness to recognize & correct their own shortcomings to the best of their ability, admiration of the good in one another, and respect for one another. Not to mention that humility & a good sense of humor goes a long long way!

And I agree with the opinion that no one can "steal" a spouse or partner.

Husbands & wives are not inanimate objects laying about on the foyer table next to the pocket-change bowl.

OT My husband is 12 yrs younger than I am also! Been together 13 now.

 

[stmarysmead]

The lies about Terri being Desiree's "friend" to their respective families seem so strange.

By the time, Terri moved in with Kaine, she'd been through two prior marriages. Including a situation where she let her second husband adopt her child from her first husband...and then tore him away from that new Dad.

Why the Big Lie to "protect her reputation" in her own Mother's eyes? At this point, did her Mother consider her the Pearl of Womanly Perfection? Love our adult children as we may, we are not blind to the way they lead their lives.

Maybe it was a cover story designed to protect Kaine.

I guess Desiree must have had little contact with Kyron's grandparents, aunts, uncles...if they all bought into the Terri-as-her-bestest-friend scenario.

Imagine having to read in the media that the "Other Woman" was posing as some heroine of your near-fatal illness.

Terri has to have some skewed personality to allow herselfto be praised and petted for such altruism when SHE KNOWS the truth.

 

[txsvicki]

I'll bet not a one of the family believed the cover story of Terri being a friend who just moved to help care for the new baby that Kaine didn't even have full custody of at that time.

 

[cakegirl0905]

It takes two to tango. Whomever chooses whomever over whomever and whatever is the problem. 2 still had to choose, and Kaine chose Terri or they would not have been married. DY got the shaft when she was at her lowest and that hurts, sucks, and you name it. Kaine was married and could have stayed home. However, he managed to get all he wanted while DY lost everything and cried her eyes out. All made choices.

ITA. But I also feel he realizes how it was all the biggest mistake of his life and is not relavent to bring Kyron home.

I have no doubt TH heavily pursued him and was instrumental in the ending of the marriage. Desiree was preganant and then had to have that woman help care for her baby when she got sick. I can't imagine how horrible that was.

 

[AbbieNormal]

How many years were Desiree and Kaine married before they divorced, does anyone know?