TH's emails shed light on Horman split

[Mamietwo]

I can't imagine sending my children away.

I can't imagine having to give them over to their fathers and then not attempting to regain custody, either.

I'm with you on this, years ago my husband and stepdad to my kids told me he wanted my oldest son out of the house because he'd been caught smoking pot. I simply told him that now is when my son needed me most to get him on the right track and if he didn't think he could live with that then maybe HE should be the one to leave. Nobody left and my son did get on the right track.

 

[Mamietwo]

Well, suppose you are pretty good in maths but not that brilliant in Spanish.

You do a Spanish test in March, you get D. You do a maths test in April, you get A.

Also, he's in a brand new school with nothing to average out yet. Maybe just one test under his belt, as you say, in a subject he does well in. Maybe the school has different standards than the one he came from. It would be interesting to know what the grades ended up being on his report card at the new school. But, then we still wouldn't know whether the problem was Kaine, Terri or both of them.

 

[Emma Peel]

FWIW, when I said "clueless", I was referring to Kaine repeatedly stating he never noticed anything out of the ordinary, everything was normal and good and routine --- even as his wife was allegedly planning to have him murdered.

Agreed ... except not really clueless.It takes two to tango this poorly.

Sending a child away from it's custodial mother to it's grandparents is NOT any sort of family strife solution. It's an easy out. Family counseling would have been the solution. Yet here we have two educated adults who opt to send the child away. (Don't care who opted more Terri or Kaine.)

Seriously, I want to hear they tried family counseling. Maybe we will hear that, but I don't think so. Because that would take actual work and accepting responsibility and facing your issues honestly and self-examination. IMO, neither Terri or Kaine were into that sort of thing. Easier to have affairs and send teenagers away.

IMO, this marriage was over and both partners unmotivated to work on it, even for the sake of her 16 year old, his 7 year old and the baby they shared.

The existence of extra-marital affairs should not surprise anyone under such conditions.

It's not that the marriage was on the rocks that bothers me. It's the cover up of that fact. :snooty:

I will take my opinion back if I'm wrong, but right now it's frustrating to think that a great deal of selfishness on the parts of both parents got in the way of raising these children. Of course we're all concerned for Kyron, but the remaining children's lives have been shattered as well - particularly the 16 year old.

JMHO

 

[txsvicki]

Kaine's "forcing" the teen boy to leave the home could have been too rigid of disciplining that led to problems. A kid can go from D's to A's in a month, because they usually get a progress report every 3 weeks, but seems like it would take awhile to get the average up to an A unless she meant the daily work. It could all be lies though. It really sounds like the marriage was breaking up even though it's not being admitted to the public, and the first marriage involving Kyron also has some discrepancies with statements now known to the public.

 

[jadejazzkayla]

I was shocked about that as well, Aedrys! Then, the only thing I could think of was that the person was a friend of Terri's. I almost sent an email to Anita Kissee asking her that, but thought if there's another reason, would I have just given her "an out" and she'd say yes.

the email was leaked to a katu news person recently by whomever terri sent it to. TERRI DID NOT SEND AN EMAIL TO KATU.

 

[Mamietwo]

No. She did not send it to KATU directly. She sent the email to a "KATU News Source." This person was probably known to Terri before, who has NOW BECOME a News Sources.

"Two months before Kyron Horman vanished, his stepmother, Terri Moulton Horman, sent an e-mail to a KATU News source regarding her biological son that provides new insight into the tension that may have been brewing in the Horman household."

OP, you may want to edit the original post.

Thanks for clearing that up! I was confused also by the terminology "news source" thinking that it was a person who worked by piece for KATU, sort of like a "snitch" for LE. But this person must have been a friend of TH, right?

 

[Mamietwo]

the email was leaked to a katu news person recently by whomever terri sent it to. TERRI DID NOT SEND AN EMAIL TO KATU.

Thanks, jade, I got it now. "News source" threw me off! Thanks!!

 

[Billylee]

That is quite misleading isn't it? I wish they'd quit doing that, I took another report that had written the same way. They should be saying "a source provided or sent Katu yadayadayada," not "a Katu news source sent yadayadayada". Who taught these people how to write a report?

 

[sherbetjello]

How does one go from D's to A's in one month? I think she's full of crap.

Totally possible to do that, and it starts when there is no longer a drive to encourage their behavior. The separation is the factor here.

http://www.healthyplace.com/anxiety...rders-in-children-and-adolescents/menu-id-69/

Now I am wondering if he participated in school (i.e., attendance)?
[I'll remove this if its borderline T/O.] Attendance can count for most of the grade, and if you miss a test/quiz a week .. (I only know this because I helped save a little sibling from these sort of depths, it's my personal experience.)

If the subject of "moving to so-and-so's house" was brought up over and over within the household for a length of time, I can totally see there being an issue (cognitive and behavioral).

This household, even when writing this, seems VERY stressful.

 

[trafficsUP66]

Terri is a selfless mother. Removed her eldest son from big bad Kaine. Very protective of Kyron, as well. Placed him in a more protective setting. Oops, forgot that Kyron has another mother! Oh, well. Terri is gonna muddle through somehow with her baby and endure life with big bad Kaine just until she can get on her feet and to a divorce attorney. The well-being of the kids first! A little sexting for amusement. A few emails to Desiree to keep in touch. A little workout to relieve the tension.

A good little Sociopath.

Yup. ITA!

The teenager's these days, Sheesh. They 'butt-heads' with just about anyone but it's just too much. Since his grades are slipping too, he can work on that over at his grand-parent's. Better to ship him off than to insist on working things out. Truly, he's getting 'A's now, see???


Kyron's walking around in a daze. Let him go to class alone while I 'watch'--BUT not until he gets 'safely' in the classroom. Sheesh. I made him an appointment. Wait, was that for Kyron OR the baby for those ears??? (dunno, got to ask the teacher)

Baby's got an earache, possible infection. Let's truck her around for a 'few' minutes on back roads to 'soothe' the poor little thing. Got her some med's.
Oh yeah, but I gotta work out and she needs some socializing with the other toddler's so I'll drop her, sick & in pain, into the day care with the other kiddie's and their germs.

Yup, then, I'll go home and stash her in her room ALONE while I post my pics on FaceBook and play just a few games. She can soothe herself. She can amuse herself.

Wish I'd known K could take her legally just like that, yeah, I would've fixed that too.

Sheesh, one mark for the FBI on that one, yeah.

Terri, the other MOTY.

Terri the Victim.

Where on earth do they come from and how come no one sees em' coming til it's far too late????

 

[Day Dreamer]

I've heard Terri was very active at Kyron's school. Does anyone know where that info came from? Was that from Terri, her friends, or another one of her emails? I am wondering, if there is any truth to that, if Terri tried to make it appear as if she were the perfect step mother for months while planning?

 

[revampz]

I think there is a whole lot more to the dynamics of any family than what meets the eye! If two people are in conflict in a relationship, wouldn't most see it "their way", regardless, otherwise there would be no conflict, or they would try to understand and talk it out. Even seek counselling. But maybe this relationship was beyond any of that, in TH's mind? Seems to me TH was trying to justify her feelings to others outside of the immediate family dynamic!

I think you have hit the nail on the head here!!!

I am sure there were lots of problems/fights/tension in the closed walls of this family, as might I add there are in lots of families.......In the street I live in there are at least 3 houses that you hear yelling from, but I wouldnt have a clue what they are yelling about...

and to say Kaine was clueless about his marriage problems....no way.....
their are rumors of an affair with someone at intel
he has acknowledged his wife has had post natal depression since the baby was born...

I certainly do not take everything Kaine says as being totally correct, this is a man who may have or may have not left his wife for another woman while she was eight months pregnant!!!!!!!!!!!!

This same wife then put a restraining order on him because he was threatening to take both her children...one of whom was not his....

and re who sent the teen away etc I am inclined to beleive the bio dad as he had two months of talking to the teen son before he spoke to the media
I think he said Terri sent him away because his grades were dropping because he was butting heads with Kaine.....I beleive this....

I dont agree that this was the right thing to do on Terris part as his mother...but I have been in the same predicament.....we sent my husbands daughter away at 16 (she had lived with us for 5 years) to her grandparents after years of fighting and tension over her constant stealing and lying.....it was hard but as there are 2 other children and the other option meant her dad leave me and them to look after her.....very hard but it saved 2 other kids having divorced parents and a weekend dad

what I am saying is maybe she did not want to leave him for the little girls sake....

Now I am not on Terris side and beleive she took Kyron to get back at Kaine who she hates with a passion
and secondly the reason she did not leave Kaine was 1) custody battle for baby K and 2) money

 

[For The Kids]

*snipped*
what I am saying is maybe she did not want to leave him for the little girls sake....

Erm and yet she reportedly was trying to hire someone to kill that little girls daddy? And she probably has taken the brother from her too. And she herself isnt even bothering to see the little girl. I seriously dont think she cares what that little girl wants at all.

 

[sherbetjello]

I seriously dont think she cares what that little girl wants at all.

Am I the only one that thinks Terri has a lot on her plate, and raising a toddler during a time of crisis wouldn't be good for any of the parties involved? Seems like combating that right now would leave more room for human error (neglect, stress, etc. etc.)

I personally think it's wise she left the child in the fathers care.
She can have the option to get custody after all these speculations (and/or charges) are over with. .. I mean, if she isn't guilty.

 

[revampz]

Am I the only one that thinks Terri has a lot on her plate, and raising a toddler during a time of crisis wouldn't be good for any of the parties involved? Seems like combating that right now would leave more room for human error (neglect, stress, etc. etc.)

I personally think it's wise she left the child in the fathers care.
She can have the option to get custody after all these speculations (and/or charges) are over with. .. I mean, if she isn't guilty.

yep totally agree....I think not having baby K with her is probably devastating to her.....I read the facebook page before it went private and it seemed like it baby K was all she talked about.....

her situation at the moment would be very very stressful and she would not be able to give the little girl any form of normal existence......but I bet it is in her mind that she is going to fight for custody when the time is right...

I dont think she thought she'd lose baby K ..........I actually think she thought she would get away with it without any heat on her......especially not as it has turned out......

I think her plan (if she did have a plan) backfired when it came to baby K.....

and rightly so if she has taken/killed Kyron....

 

[DairyGirl]

I've heard Terri was very active at Kyron's school. Does anyone know where that info came from? Was that from Terri, her friends, or another one of her emails? I am wondering, if there is any truth to that, if Terri tried to make it appear as if she were the perfect step mother for months while planning?

There seemed to be a lot of pictures of her at the school. I think she probably was there quite a bit. Being a teacher and all.

 

[Mamietwo]

That is quite misleading isn't it? I wish they'd quit doing that, I took another report that had written the same way. They should be saying "a source provided or sent Katu yadayadayada," not "a Katu news source sent yadayadayada". Who taught these people how to write a report?

But it's more sensational the way it was written. I mean look how many of us were questioning why she would do that two months in advance of Kyron going missing? The news isn't interested in just reporting news, they need people to drop what they're doing.

I think the worst ones are the stations that give the teasers and then the article is never aired.

 

[pufnstuf]

Perps also try to throw suspicion away from what they did, so maybe she wants people to focus on 9 to 10 because she knows it happened at a different time and wants to distract from the real time.

Casey Anthony told everyone that she felt that Caylee "was close," that she believed Caylee was close to home. Indeed, Caylee was. Nearly in the Anthonys' back yard.

 

[cypress]

What I think is interesting about TH's wording is what she doesn't say.

Instead of saying, "What in the world do they think I did with Kyron? I love him and I would never hurt him! I want him back!", she builds herself an alibi.

But if she'd been questioned for hours on end, and according to multiple sources, she had, then where she'd been would be on her mind. IMHO, and rightly or wrongly, LE's continued focus on her alibi put her in the position of being defensive and talking incessantly about her alibi. We don't know if she said anything about Kyron (actually, she did talk about Kyron and baby K in several e-mails/texts, but that's rarely reported), because the e-mails were edited, but we know she'd been questioned for hours about where she was that day. Terri's father and many others, including friends and the infamous Michael Cook, reference six hour interrogation times, sometimes hours and hours focusing on one question. I'm not saying LE shouldn't focus on her, because they should, but if she's innocent, if she didn't harm Kyron and she loves this child, then how would you expect her to react? She did cooperate. LE said she cooperated until she hired Houze. When Desiree was asked clarify how Terri had been uncooperative, she said it was because Terri had failed to give LE the answers that would bring Kyron home, but that's assuming she's guilty. And Desiree, by her own admission, from day one always assumed Terri was guilty, and in her words has never considered that someone other than Terri is responsible for Kyron's disappearance.

It's all well and good for everyone to assume Terri should sit in her chair and meekly cooperate, but if she's innocent, if she loves Kyron as so many believe and attest to, then why wouldn't she be frustrated? If she sensed this level of suspicion, how would any reasonable person expect she would act?

This is something I truly don't understand, and it's not directed specifically at you, but it's something that truly baffles me. When Desiree asserted Terri couldn't or wouldn't account for her whereabouts, there was shock and awe, and most everyone asserted that Terri was being awful and about a thousand other things, because what could be so terrible that she wouldn't confess about what she'd been doing that day. She needed to speak up, she needed to tell LE, shout from the rooftops where she'd been that day! Come to find out, she did tell LE what she was doing that day, repeatedly, and she told others what she was doing that day, too, because she sensed the suspicion. However, now, she's being too specific or not specific enough and she's focused too much on her alibi, and because she's talking so much about where she was that day, well, then, that's proof of her guilt, too.

Several people have asserted that it's obvious she resented Kyron, and yet when she stops to chat with someone she knew from the gym, and shows that woman her picture of Kyron, it can't be because she cares about Kyron and is proud of him, it's because she's establishing her alibi.

Now the debate has turned to whether or not baby K was sick, and where Terri ranks on the bad mom scale for taking her daughter to daycare instead of home, when the report is that baby K was teething. Terri and Kaine alluded to this. Anyone who's been around babies knows that when they're teething, they are cranky, fussy, and don't feel well, but they're not contagious, and a lot of times there's not much you can do for them.

Terri may well be guilty, she may be a bad parent, neglectful of her children and selfish about her time, but how many of us can claim that every decision we've ever made about life and children and difficult issues such as blended families or divorce or what have you would hold up under the microscope?

Forgive the manifesto...

 

[SurfieTX]

Cypress,

Good post. And you can include me when it comes to that microscope. I've been married only once for almost 19 years, but we both have our skeletons and issues. God forbid if those became tabloid fodder. People would be talking for WEEKS.