This is so infuriating! The judge needs to start cracking the whip.
On another note, I agree with those who have said that Jodi has appropriated a ton of her scenario elements from pop culture. I think she sees herself as the wronged heroine in some sappy Lifetime movie; in fact, I can envision the first couple of scenes (from her perspective):
Open on a shot of a black misty FOG that slowly dissipates to reveal a gnarly hand (right? left?) gripping a bloody knife. The hand releases the knife which clangs loudly on a tiled floor - as the knife hurls to the ground we hear a blood curdling scream. Camera pans up to close-up of JODI's pigtailed face, mouth open in mid-scream, with two bloody hands pressed against her cheeks (note to self: think Munch's "Scream"). JODI starts shivering like a chihuahua as she frantically surveys the room....
Quick MTV cuts around room, accompanied by "whirr" of camera button being pressed: bullet on pool of blood/copious blood in sink/TRAVIS' body in shower. Black misty FOG starts swirling in again as we quick cut to....
Soundtrack (maybe Miranda Lambert's "Kerosene"?) playing over a bird's eye view of white Ford Focus wildly swerving across a two-lane desert highway. As camera pans in slowly, credits start to roll:
Working Titles: The Fog Who Loved Me/A Foggy Day in Mesa-Town/The Fog That Ate My Brain/Me & Foggy McGee (er, still working on it)
Written, Produced & Directed by JODI ARIAS
Starring:
Jennifer Love Hewitt as JODI
Bradley Cooper as TRAVIS
Andy Garcia as Prosecutor Martinez
Jimmy Smits as Det. Flores
Marc Anthony as Bobby Suarez
Robert Pattinson as Matt McCartney
Michael Richards as Darryl Brewer
Kristen Stewart as Mimi
John Goodman as Defense Attorney Nurmi
Tina Fey as Defense Attorney Wilmott
Rita Moreno as Defense Lady with Spangly Earrings
The Olson Twins as Ma/Auntie Arias
with special appearance by The Smoke Monster of Lost as THE FOG
Soundtrack by Foghat, Mel Torme [RIP] aka "The Velvet Fog" (others TBD)
Special consideration provided by: Starbucks, KY Jelly, Costco, Clairol, Standard Oil, Walmart, CVS, Walgreens, Western Costumes
As credits end and song fades out, we are now closer to the car as it careens off side of road and comes to abrupt stop. Cut to interior of car as black misty FOG starts to exit car through open windows and we see JODI slam up against steering wheel. She leans back in her seat and slowly shakes her head as though struggling to regain consciousness. Blinded by the desert sun she shields her eyes with one bloody hand....noticing the blood, she lifts her other hand and sees blood on that as well. She looks at her left hand, then at her right, maybe a couple more times until her face is filled with a horrible realization and then she screams (but not like a girl).
She quickly exits her car and runs to the trunk barefoot, fumbling with her keys to unlock it. Extreme close-up of bloody hands shaking. She reaches for a bottle of Costco water and rummages around for a rag.... she finds a ball of rope and picks it up with a quizzical look on her face. She moves her briefcase and finds a small gun; she picks this up as well and turns it over in her bloody hands as though this is something alien. Looking quickly around her, she establishes there's no one around her in the desert to witness this. She quickly pours the water over her hands, strips down to her skivvies and grabs a tank top, shorts and business shoes from her backpack and changes into them, balling up her old clothes, the gun and the rope and throwing them in the back seat. She hops into the car and takes off as THE FOG starts creeping through the windows, engulfing our heroine in its black misty claws.....
If anyone can come up with the next couple of scenes I'm open to collaborators. I'd like to work in Tori Spelling if at all possible.
