TX - 'Lori Ruff', Longview, WhtFem UP9863, *General Discussion and Theories* #2

[giagreen]

This was a welcome laugh.

The more I think of it though, I am sure the answer lays in the Pacific North West. Edit to add- my boyfriend helpfully pointed out that "Becky Sue Turner"'s hair looks super terrible in her Idaho DL picture- that fact might indicate she was confident her total plan to switch IDs to Lori Kennedy was going to work- I mean, why waste time on hairstyling and makeup when one knows that a DL pic will be of no use in the near future?

Her hair looks a bit better in the pink and black sweater pic, it looks like a variation of the "Hair Bear Poof" that was popular in the late 80s and early 90s. These things point to either someone who didn't care much about hairstyling (like a cult member) or someone who was used to rushing through things.

Also the fact that she had to get a GED is telling-obviously her teenage years were disrupted. The average teen in America of that era could count on a cozy high school existence...she either had a broken home or came from somewhere where high school was not considered essential.

I think she had to get a GED for her new identity because she obviously couldnt use anything from her past. This makes me think maybe she was educated and education ment something to her. She seems smart. Criminals are usualy dumb and couldn't pull something like this off.

 

[Taniwha]

I get the feeling she passed high school under her real name. Bad spelling and mixed grades aren't really an indicator of poor education. We all have different strengths and weaknesses.

My only issue with that is WHY OH WHY has no-one identified her yet? Home school?

Unless of course she left just before she could take the exams? Perhaps she had to leave in a hurry?

 

[Sherwood Park]

I think she had to get a GED for her new identity because she obviously couldnt use anything from her past. This makes me think maybe she was educated and education ment something to her. She seems smart. Criminals are usualy dumb and couldn't pull something like this off.

That would make sense.
I don't necessarily see anything to indicate that she was "educated", but yes, education probably meant something to her or else she wouldn't have gone through the lengthy process to obtain the GED, then an entire degree. Unfortunately it appears as if she may not have used the skills and knowledge she had gained from her degree. Her "occupations" as far we know was in positions that don't require anything more than a GED or High School diploma.

Again, she completed a degree, but where are her friends from college? We all have at least one person that we keep in some form of contact with from college or our college years.

She told her husband that she had played basketball in High School (it's in one of the news articles), so she doesn't sound like someone from a sheltered religious colony. I can't see women living in a reclusive colony and playing for the campus basketball team. Long skirts, hair in buns, doesn't make for good athletes.

 

[WyomingSkyAngel]

IMO I tend to be suspicious of some of the things she told Blake Ruff. He was the most important person to impress after she met him (seeing as all of her future security depended on being able to marry him.) She might have crafted a very plausible tale that didn't paint her in a bad light.

I realized that Blake's parents do what "old timers" do- they pick apart stories for the full truth. Face it, no one is perfect and we all tend to gloss over past failures and disappointments for lots of reasons. They were obviously concerned that FLEK might be with Blake for sinister reasons. There are plenty of mean statements about WHY a woman might be unmarried in her middle years of life. They probably expected she was quirky or "mental" but not prepared for the full truth here.

Another mundane theory I have is- FLEK might have bailed on a marriage, taking a lot of her husband's money with her. She might have been a typical "bad wife" who runs around, does drugs and is impossible to deal with....That simple fact would be enough to have an oil money family run her off. (God knows I put my brother's now-wife through the paces when she had not married yet- I let her know that if she was out to mess my brother over, she was going to be SORRY she tried...)

The truth might be the plainest truth- she did something a bit scummy that would ruin her potential as someone else's wife and didn't want anyone to know...

 

[Faithandhope]

IMO I tend to be suspicious of some of the things she told Blake Ruff. He was the most important person to impress after she met him (seeing as all of her future security depended on being able to marry him.) She might have crafted a very plausible tale that didn't paint her in a bad light.

I realized that Blake's parents do what "old timers" do- they pick apart stories for the full truth. Face it, no one is perfect and we all tend to gloss over past failures and disappointments for lots of reasons. They were obviously concerned that FLEK might be with Blake for sinister reasons. There are plenty of mean statements about WHY a woman might be unmarried in her middle years of life. They probably expected she was quirky or "mental" but not prepared for the full truth here.

Another mundane theory I have is- FLEK might have bailed on a marriage, taking a lot of her husband's money with her. She might have been a typical "bad wife" who runs around, does drugs and is impossible to deal with....That simple fact would be enough to have an oil money family run her off. (God knows I put my brother's now-wife through the paces when she had not married yet- I let her know that if she was out to mess my brother over, she was going to be SORRY she tried...)

The truth might be the plainest truth- she did something a bit scummy that would ruin her potential as someone else's wife and didn't want anyone to know...

I totally get that, and have often thought it myself... but why wouldn't ANYONE recognize her? Any the extreme lengths to hide her true identity?

Anyone needing just a fresh start could change their name and move across the country.... but she really went to some lengths, extraordinary lengths IMO, to hide her past.

And IMO, it is unlikely that it was for general criminal activity, as her fingerprints would be recognized by the system..

 

[WyomingSkyAngel]

And IMO, it is unlikely that it was for general criminal activity, as her fingerprints would be recognized by the system..

Well if she never got caught for her crime (murdering a drug dealer/wealthy person, bank robbery, etc.) there would be no record.

 

[branwynbreeze]

I've meant to write this for awhile, but kept having something come up.

I have a friend that is one of five kids. All the kids were being abused physically, sexually, emotionally and taken by CPS in early 1980s. All were split up in foster care where some were adopted, some not. LEK could have come from a situation like that and it's darn difficult to trace.

My friend has tried adoption boards to find some of her siblings, the parents are deceased. She has tried to trace parents on Ancestry, but can't find info on them.

 

[giagreen]

I just keep thinking what could one woman do so bad in life that she could never go back. Even when she new she was going to kill her self she did not leave a note. Nothing. Just extremely weird tid bits of random notes in a safe.
Seems important enough to lock up. So one would think its gotta be a huge clue.

 

[Taniwha]

The foster thing is a possibility but why go to such extreme lengths? There has to be more.

The fact that she didn't leave a note explaining exactly who she was makes me think that she was scared of someone, but it doesn't sound as though she seemed paranoid (before her break down at least). SO perhaps someone had tracked her down or she had spotted someone? I don't know.

I think the end of her journey isn't as important to solving this mystery as the start is.

No matter what she may have done in the past, her daughter deserves to know who she is and who her mum really was.

 

[WyomingSkyAngel]

Part of a mental breakdown is seeing things and "patterns" where there are none. She could have been irrationally convinced that someone familiar was stalking her.

Another side note my boyfriend brought up.... (he is in the same age range as FLEK & grew up in Portland, Oregon in the late 1980s.) He said FLEK was "too ugly" to be a stripper. So that brought up another idea- had she been using the occupation of exotic dancing to either launder money or facilitate an illegal occupation (such as interstate drug trafficking or worse?) It's very common for exotic dancers to use the "cash income" aspect of working in strip bars to either launder money OR facilitate a lifestyle that is very exclusive or demanding.

Why would FLEK have faked a document stating she spent time in Asia? Was she either trafficking drugs from there (a surprisingly common thing in the late 1980s) OR involved in something strange/shady? Was it a more modern cult than any of the FLDS ones? Did she suddenly feel a need to break away from all of her associates? Given how frightened some people are of Scientologists in this day and age...I wouldn't be surprised if an ex-cult member of some obscure cult spent all of her savings to essentially be "as good as dead" to all of her ex-friends and associates.

 

[Taniwha]

Yes I have thought that it may have been imaginary too or at least to a certain degree.

As for the faked document, why not? It's far away enough for most people not to bother calling and if they do then worst thing is that you won't get the job.

 

[j123]

One thing sticking out to me about the discussion, which I think I've brought up with other cases too; while it's natural for us to try to apply logic and reasoning to theories about FLEK, it's also important to keep in mind that this might be a counter-intuitive scenario where that doesn't actually help. She was obviously suffering from mental illness, and the "craziest", most out-there possible reason she could have had for making any of her decisions may actually be the most likely one.

 

[WyomingSkyAngel]

One thing sticking out to me about the discussion, which I think I've brought up with other cases too; while it's natural for us to try to apply logic and reasoning to theories about FLEK, it's also important to keep in mind that this might be a counter-intuitive scenario where that doesn't actually help. She was obviously suffering from mental illness, and the "craziest", most out-there possible reason she could have had for making any of her decisions may actually be the most likely one.

What also crossed my mind is she might have randomly decided to start a new life after what most term a "bad trip" (LSD or even psychosis from another drug.) But she was functional enough to get through college and not accrue an arrest record.

The "runaway girlfriend/wife" theory is one of my favorites, since there might have been no missing persons report if she told her partner where she was going (whether she was being truthful or not.) This is a grim truth but a lot of people do die alone in this world, either by being impossible to live with, or willfully isolating themselves, or just bad luck (outliving everyone else.) It's not too weird that no one recognizes her yet...it's been many years since she switched identities.

 

[LucyOso]

I know this has been mentioned before...but did they do DNA to rule-out Tara Calico? Thanks

 

[WyomingSkyAngel]

BTW can anyone find the docs from her bankruptcy case? There might be helpful info in there. It's very odd to me that someone like her would file bankruptcy BUT what I am thinking is she was taught by someone she knew before her ID change that bankruptcy was an easy way to dodge debt. Also she might have been dealing with serious personal problems & just fell behind on her expenses- with her being on her own I could see how bankruptcy sounded like a perfect "Band Aid" solution to her predicament.

Also the fact she met Blake Ruff at a Bible Study group makes me think- might she have been still struggling years after the bankruptcy & realized a quick ticket to stability would be a naive churchgoing male?

(Side note- if she was indeed "Lacey" from Deja Vu in Seattle, WA- that's an interesting dancer name to use b/c it was very popular at the time & she could have claimed to REALLY be named Lacey since it's not a crazy stripper name like Bubbles. In other words this could indicate she was exceptionally clever & FLEK might have just been a common crazy female grifter. Which would honestly be a relief considering all the wild theories here....)

 

[falseedsonbaker]

I've always been curious about the bankruptcy. It still only gives us more post name change information, but may have some info of some use.

 

[LeChat]

Not that long a shot. There is an entire separate thread devoted to a set of theories that she was connected to a specific branch of the FLDS. You should read the entire thread. It is still my favorite theory to explain this case.

http://www.websleuths.com/forums/showthread.php?215584-LDS-Theories-Relations-to-LeBarons-Chenoweths

Great, thank you. I will read the thread later when I have more time.

 

[scriptgirl]

Why is Lori called Flek? I still say the in-laws were a nightmare, but I think in-law, esp, mother-in-laws tend to be. I also don't think that it is a big deal if someone is evasive or private about their life with the in-laws-your private life and your blood family is really none of your in-law's business. As long as your spouse knows all and is cool with it, that is all that matters. In-laws can kick rocks.

 

[Sherwood Park]

Why is Lori called Flek? I still say the in-laws were a nightmare, but I think in-law, esp, mother-in-laws tend to be. I also don't think that it is a big deal if someone is evasive or private about their life with the in-laws-your private life and your blood family is really none of your in-law's business. As long as your spouse knows all and is cool with it, that is all that matters. In-laws can kick rocks.

The Ruffs were not a nightmare, they were correct and their hunch proved to be right, there was something suspicious about her and it turned out to be worse than they could have imagined for their son and granddaughter.

Her spouse did not know all, he knew nothing. There is absolutely nothing that he knows about his deceased wife, nada, this is why they are/were trying to find out her real identity so they could at least know one thing about her.

Her in-laws are not kicking rocks, they are helping to raise their granddaughter and be of support to their son. I would never wish them ill-will when they have a grandchild to help raise. I truly believe people here on WS would like her identity to be discovered so that this mystery could be solved and bring healing to those FLEK left behind.

 

[NDMagoo]

At this point, if and when we do discover who FLEK "really" was, I feel it will be anticlimactic. She won't be some long-lost runaway or kidnap victim, and her identity won't solve some infamous crime. If she was really being sought in one way or another, she would have been found by now. I'd have to agree with the conclusion that no one was apparently looking for her. If this is indeed the case, the back story is probably not too epic. We've all known folks who are estranged or otherwise without immediate family, people who socially exist in the background, and those who quickly burn any bridges they create. Combine the above traits, and it's not implausible that someone could effectively disappear unnoticed. Maybe someday, someone who sort of knew that girl will see her photo and recall her name. But if there was a grand mystery narrative behind her, I feel it would have surfaced by now.