BBM!! I know EXACTLY what you mean!! I am right there with you, JWD!! I know first hand what it feels like to be abused...I had 30 years of it...25 with the ex husband and 5 years with the ex fiance. Everything from having a pistol pulled on me while I was on the sofa right after surgery on my right side and had stitches, was almost choked to death in the front yard, I was stalked, had my hair grabbed and my face slammed into the console of the car I was driving at 65 mph on the interstate, headbutted in the face, and much much more! Abusers can be calculating, manipulative, all the while looking like the normal boy next door or the hardworking, good looking construction guy. Those of us who have survived and gotten out alive, we are truly blessed and lucky. It breaks my heart to know there are some who are not as fortunate. Still praying for a miracle for Melissa!!!!!!