That’s the other thing. All that turmoil and chaos, you really think she’s in the right place to be writing what is alleged to be a confession? No I wouldn’t. I never take emotion laden projection as serious talk, said it before its warm language in a proper confession it’s always cold Maybe interspersed with warmer words. Imo.
No it doesn't. "I killed them on purpose" makes perfect sense as a standalone sentence.
I don't think the prosecution are arguing that she intended to write the note as a confession to be read by others. More the words betray her inner turmoil, guilt and self loathing. It could be the beginnings of a suicide note. Maybe she was working up to it.
But there were other bits she scribbled out as part of her 'process' like 'maybe I did do this, maybe it's all down to me'
It’s the byproduct of not being sure of something that someone no matter how deeply buried does indeed know.
You have done an excellent job of describing the note, how I interpreted it. I think even verbally though, it is difficult to explain this viewpoint. My husband is very black and white, takes things literally and would never say things he didn’t mean in an argument. He didn’t get why LL would write that to herself if it wasn’t true either. He has never experienced depression/self loathing and that is exactly how I read this note. Where others saw it as a red flag, the sheer lack of confidence in herself made me think she didn’t fit the profile. JMO
Think of it this way. You are accused of something, at the start of that process you are sure you didn’t do anything but after weeks and months of having nearly everyobe try to convince you that you did do something you sure as hell will start to doubt yourself. It’s the way abusers mentally condition people, it’s the way gaslighting works and it’s also a part of traumatic bonding eventually leading to Stockholm syndrome. She only became confident once her competencies were given the all clear, before that much niggling doubt But never thinking if she did hurt them it was deliberate. Especially close to the time of suspension.
Ok but in her police interview she said she wrote the note around July/August 2016. Just weeks after being taken off the unit. So she seems to have spiralled into this pretty quickly
Not to mention she still worked full time in "Safety..." office.
She was suspended from the job she loved and was more or less her whole world in her own words. The impact will be felt immediately and then every following day in the very same hospital, surrounded by all the same staff with every wakeful Second another reminder of what she is accused of, followed by the realisation that only she has been taken off the ward will presumably be quite torturous if innocent. A fitting saying “killing me softly” akin to what is described in some literature “death by a thousand cuts”. It’s described in some psychological books. She was surrounded by things reminding her of her ongoing suffering.
None of that was anything to do with the point of mine you responded to.
Definitely. especially for any individual who has zero experience with anything like it. For her the arrests were also on top of what had been around a years worth of at least high stress. then to top it all off, 6 am raid, handcuffs and pyjamas for someone who seems like someone who belongs a billion light years away from these accusations.
A long time if the defence is going to go through each allegation with anything close to the intensity the prosecution did, I'd wager!
But the statements of innocence are more numerous than the statement as to guilt. You can't just pick the ones which fit what you want to think.
Why would a killer also say they didn't do it?
Because they tend to be deceptive folk in the main, IMO
I agree. This is not how people talk, at least not adults. It's like something you'd hear from a seven year-old.
You ever known one?
