Identified! VA - Annandale, WhtFem ~60, 245UFVA, 'NO CODE, DNR, No Penicillin', Dec'96 #2 - Joyce Meyer Sommers

[NeverPersonal]

Maybe it's me, but I couldn't find any images of Joyce in that yearbook. The name Meyer appears in some images but they are of a male. An intersting note is that she may have attended during the time two famous writers attended. Flannery O'Connor and William Snodgrass who was a Pulitzer prize winner.

Same. I even went to the page stated and did not see her at all. I did a search for her name even, and couldn't find one photo that appeared to be her. Very confused.

 

[Betty P]

So sorry that Joyce was suffering so much. Glad her family now knows where she is and can mourn her.

In addition to her conflicts and problems during childhood, it also sounds like she was burdened with financial problems. Many women her age find themselves in this situation, unfortunately. It sounds like she was experiencing financial difficulty when living in AZ, then its believed she moved to the DC area. It's an expensive place to find housing. She may have found herself homeless and without hope for her future. Bless her heart, I hope she found peace.

 

[GatorFL]

It definitely happens more than you think - it is 99% likely she did not meet the Heaven's Gate cult lol. It would be very improbable for her to run into a cult member and they just casually share the way that they plan to commit mass suicide.

I did a number of searches of for suicides by asphyxiation, plastic bags, asphyxia after imbibing drugs and alcohol. Interestingly not a lot popped up. I did see a couple of studies about the way Joyce died, and some other studies. Notably several on suicide by asphyxia via helium. So anecdotally I think it is relatively rare vs other methods.

I agree the odds are she was not involved in Heaven's Gate. But I thought it notable that a large group of people died in the same relatively rare way as Joyce 3 months later. What are the odds of that? Just as small.

 

[LeahBee]

I did a number of searches of for suicides by asphyxiation, plastic bags, asphyxia after imbibing drugs and alcohol. Interestingly not a lot popped up. I did see a couple of studies about the way Joyce died, and some other studies. Notably several on suicide by asphyxia via helium. So anecdotally I think it is relatively rare vs other methods.

I agree the odds are she was not involved in Heaven's Gate. But I thought it notable that a large group of people died in the same relatively rare way as Joyce 3 months later. What are the odds of that? Just as small.

I know this thread is about a woman who took her own life but I want to include a trigger warning here anyways.

There was a lot of discussion on the previous thread theorizing she might have read the book called "Final Exit", essentially a guide for committing suicide (meant for the terminally ill, but -). I didn't read it, but others were saying that this method she used was described in this book, along with advice about tying up loose ends, having a living will, etc. This book was the NY Times #1 best seller in the early 90s.

ETA: I went back to the first thread to get some references.
Here is where the discussion about "The Final Exit" begins, and it is referenced now and again through the rest of the thread

Also for anyone curious - because I brought it up before - Here is the post with information from the original detective on the case regarding no autopsy and other details. He also mentions she may have had some sort of connection to The Hemlock Society - a right-to-die organization created by the author of Final Exit. However, I'm not sure if this speculation is based on anything other than her method chosen was outlined in Final Exit.

 

[PatLaurel]

@LeahBee, thanks for bringing thread #1 up. I finally found Joyce's PM photos. That vertical scar doesn't look like a C-Section to me...

Warning: Sensitive content.

Comment #437
Identified! - VA - Annandale, WhtFem 245UFVA, ~60, 'NO CODE, DNR, No Penicillin', Dec'96

MOO JMO

 

[Susikatze]

It also looks like it extends upwards from the umbilicus towards the sternum, too.not only down towards the pubis.
It is not a csection. Some other major abdominal surgery. Impossible to tell, which. Gut, stomach, virtually anything that requires laparotomy.

 

[Cattydcat]

Go Othram!!! They truly are amazing.

I am pleased that the Christmas Tree Lady has her name back. RIP Joyce. I am also pleased that her family have allowed some of her story to be told. However, clearly she had a difficult time of it and I feel she will be at peace now.

Just wanted to say in response to the Targeted Child book discussions that have taken place and whether or not Joyce suffered in childhood but I just wanted to relay a little bit of context from a personal perspective. A family member had 14 children and I am close to the second eldest child. Although he would never say he was mistreated as such, he felt that his parents had no time for their children, as there was always a new baby to look after and the father's job entailed them moving around a lot. He also felt that he didn't want children of his own as he had already parented his younger brothers and sisters, along with his older brother and the next one in line to him, as a girl. He also had a certain amount anger towards his parents for simply having that many children, for the strain on his mother and also economics of it.

I am also close to the second youngest of this family and she cared for her dad, after his wife died at a relatively young age of 64. She won't have a word said against her father yet several of the older children thought he was harsh with them, or rather strict.

Just my observations but to a sensitive child who was artistic and intelligent, yet out on a farm during an economically difficult time with many younger siblings and all the attitudes people had them to females and their expected role in life - it could have felt like abuse to Joyce, I believe even if at the time, it was not seen like that.

Of course, that is projection and we can never know but just my thoughts.

 

[Cattydcat]

If you look up the term the "target child" or "targeted child" you'll see what Joyce meant. I was looking for her book and ended up reading more about that term. I had never heard that term before and I actually know a lot about abusive parent issues ( and family estrangement). I do believe Joyce about her abusive childhood although I understand her sister's perspective.


I'm glad her family was open ( or I should say sister, as her brother is obviously very elderly) about her story when they didn't have to be. My guess is her sister is so up in years as is her brother that they didn't feel it would cause the family embarrassment or anything at this point to have Joyce's true story out there..her sister felt it was just best to be open. Joyce unfortunately never found happiness in life at least for very long and Christmas and the holiday season can be a hard time for people who have family problems and estrangement as well as for lonely people. It could be that Christmas reminded of her traumatic holidays in her childhood, too. Just some thoughts on the time of year she committed suicide. The holiday season may well have been a tough time for her.

Of course, in winter, it was much less likely anyone would be visiting the cemetery or doing groundswork, mowing, etc and interrupt her plans. I wonder why Joyce thought her family should build her a house in Arizona. It doesn't sound like they had money. Her siblings obviously cared and care, but Joyce was obviously more at peace living her life in her own way..until the end. I wonder where she was living in late 1996. Maybe she lived close enough to walk to the cemetery? Some of the missing pieces of her story we will probably never know.

I could be completely wrong obviously as we are all just guessing but I think the "buy me a house" could be one of two things - Joyce may have been unhappy with her situation and indicated she needed help and it was intrepreted as that (because it does seem a really odd thing to demand of anyone, sibling or not). Could it also be some family dynamic that we don't understand as well - maybe she didn't receive any inheritance from the parents because of the conflicts and the siblings did so therefore she might feel entitled to their help?

Of course, it could equally be mental illness, desperation etc. I guess we will never know. I just feel glad that she deserved her name back and sadness at the unhappiness that seems to have been felt by a lady who was clearly intelligent and with a good sense of humour.

 

[Krispin]

RIP Joyce.

 

[fred&edna]

I agree. She wanted to be alone; who am I to deny her that?

But at the same time I hope she knows that even if she didn't feel she had love in her life at the end, there are people who love her now.

Many of us have spent years looking for clues and loving (as our own family members) the unidentified that fill so many pages on WS. Science and LE are working hand-in-hand to join us as we see the success stories growing for those we feel we've known for so long. Amazing work!

 

[dewey decimal]

Just wanted to point out that some of the yearbooks linked earlier in this thread are from University of Iowa, but the Washington Post article states Joyce attended Iowa State University--not the same school! Perhaps we can look for ISU yearbooks instead.

 

[branmuffin]

Just wanted to point out that some of the yearbooks linked earlier in this thread are from University of Iowa, but the Washington Post article states Joyce attended Iowa State University--not the same school! Perhaps we can look for ISU yearbooks instead.

No wonder we couldn't find her picture! I found an image of her on page 141 (the actual page of the yearbook) in the 1949 Iowa State University. She graduated in 1949 from the Home Economics stream.

1949 Bomb | Iowa State University Library

digitalcollections.lib.iastate.edu

 

[branmuffin]

No wonder we couldn't find her picture! I found an image of her on page 141 (the actual page of the yearbook) in the 1949 Iowa State University. She graduated in 1949 from the Home Economics stream.

1949 Bomb | Iowa State University Library

digitalcollections.lib.iastate.edu

I think the OP just mixed up the two universities since all the pages they mentioned upthread, Joyce shows up on. The weird thing is some of those pages in the other university yearbook actually had a Meyer on them, only male. What are the odds?

@ELongo19862022 Hey! come back, you did some great sleuthing finding those pictures. The names of the universities are confusing since the one Joyce went to was actually called Iowa State College when she attended; it was changed to Iowa State University in 1959.

 

[PatLaurel]

No wonder we couldn't find her picture! I found an image of her on page 141 (the actual page of the yearbook) in the 1949 Iowa State University. She graduated in 1949 from the Home Economics stream.

1949 Bomb | Iowa State University Library

digitalcollections.lib.iastate.edu

Thanks for finding the book, @branmuffin!

Page 141



Page 225


Page 251


Page 273

Did you see her yearbook pictures? She looks just like her post mortom pictures.

And you are right, @ELongo19862022, she looks just like her PM pictures, particularly in the second photo. Joyce had an exquisite face and a very captivating gaze.

MOO JMO

 

[typical_vacation]

For whose who are interested. Joyce attended the University of Iowa in 1949. Her year book picture is in the book. She was an editor and interested in journalism. She must have been an excellent writer. This was before she married and moved to Los Angeles. Still doesn't answer why she ended up in the DMV.

University of Iowa Hawkeye yearbook, 1949 | The University of Iowa Libraries

digital.lib.uiowa.edu

On Iowa, Joyce! Rest easy.

eta: she was an Iowa State student, not university of Iowa. So, just this once, I’ll say a big Go State for Joyce .

 

[Eman317]

RIP Joyce.

 

[MsRicki]

I could be completely wrong obviously as we are all just guessing but I think the "buy me a house" could be one of two things - Joyce may have been unhappy with her situation and indicated she needed help and it was intrepreted as that (because it does seem a really odd thing to demand of anyone, sibling or not). Could it also be some family dynamic that we don't understand as well - maybe she didn't receive any inheritance from the parents because of the conflicts and the siblings did so therefore she might feel entitled to their help?

Of course, it could equally be mental illness, desperation etc. I guess we will never know. I just feel glad that she deserved her name back and sadness at the unhappiness that seems to have been felt by a lady who was clearly intelligent and with a good sense of humour.

I wondered the same things. I thought it was particularly interesting that she went from Seattle to Tucson then somehow to Annandale--those are three totally different places— and then she seemed to have a Belgium connection in there with her eyeglasses and the Looza juice. I had thought there might be a Seattle/West Coast connection with the REI backpack and Nordstrom clothing, as those were not common brands in the DC area in 1996. I'll bet she would have been a very interesting person to know.

 

[GarAndTeed]

I would not necessarily assume that the sister is fully aware of Joyce's lived experiences. So often the oldest child becomes the scapegoat, and the younger siblings have no idea what the scapegoat went through because she protected them.

I know so many abuse victims whose siblings don't believe the abuse happened. I choose to believe Joyce.

I can't thank you enough for saying this. Being the "scapegoat" is hard enough...being discounted is often unbearable. Thanks again.

 

[SimplyCass]

Wow, I never expected this to be solved. (600+ rule-outs has to be a record?)

Anyway, if Joyce was 69 in 1996, tentatively born 1927 or so, and would be 95 this year. Assuming she and her siblings are within 10 years, the youngest would be 85, oldest could be 93-94.

RIP Joyce.

 

[FaerieDust]

So glad to read that Joyce has been identified. Well done Othram!!

RIP Joyce. No matter the reason for your death you will always be remembered fondly as the Christmas tree lady. Tidy, methodical and intelligent with a great sense of humour.

The WaPo article on her identification has a bit that touches on why she may have chosen the children’s part of the cemetery.

(Clough being Joyce’s sister for context)
“And then, somehow, Sommers chose the cemetery on Little River Turnpike in Annandale, in a section near where babies and children are buried. Detectives found no connection between Sommers and any of the graves, and Clough said she believed her sister did not have any children, despite a large scar across her stomach that detectives thought might have come from a Caesarean delivery. Clough theorized that her sister chose the children’s section of the cemetery as a symbolic nod to her belief that children can be permanently damaged by their parents.”

Quote from the above mentioned article.