Found Deceased VA - Morgan Dana Harrington, 20, Charlottesville, 17 Oct 2009 - #13

[nostoneunturned]

We do not know,if the friends are talking or not..just because we don't know what they said,doesn't mean they have not went over every second of the trip and arrival to LE and to the Harringtons....
There is no doubt in my mind that the H's loved M,she was their pride and joy..
The H's seem like they have no resentment,or feel like the friends did anything wrong..I really am beginning to believe ..they told them enough that they feel comfortable that what ever happened the friends couldn't have stopped it...
If we knew if M was fooling her parents..acting like the good girl but really had other ideas..maybe we could think the parents are easily fooled or just aren't aware..but I don't get that impression from them do you?
Since we are not aware of most of the information. it is hard to form a total opinion about what happened to M but I don't think we should pass judgment on the friends until we know the whole story.....
I'm beginning to think what they told LE was so helpful and pointed them to the person involved, that LE doesn't want to tip their hand.

 

[Calliope]

She was 20 years old not 5, legally none of them should have been drinking but they probably all were..except the driver who was NOT even close to them apparently

they "knew" she couldn't get into her car...but what could they do?? nothing...she made ONE call to them and after than her phone was not "on" (battery presumably lost)

so that simply lets out all the ideas of "meet her with the keys, throw her the keys"...they had no idea where she was and no way to find out

I'm sorry, but bull****. They knew she was outside the arena and had been trying to get back in. That's when one (if not all) of them should have, as pippi stated, got off their butts and went out to her.

they went to the concert in her car....they drove back home in it...they were trying to call her and waited around (time varies according to which article one reads but they did wait)

what else could they do in a crowded loud music arena??

LEFT.

so easy to cast blame...really there were a LOT of things to blame that night but one needs to remember there is a murderer out there...

maybe he is just waiting for some other young woman to be vulnerable, make mistakes...he is the one who murdered Morgan, not her friennds

He is absolutely the one to blame for Morgan's murder. That doesn't mean that I can't question the friends' actions.

She was 20 years old not 5, legally none of them should have been drinking but they probably all were..except the driver who was NOT even close to them apparently

Then the driver of all people (being sober) should have had the judgment so clearly lacking in the others. As an aside here, and I do NOT mean you specifically, I find it rather ironic that many of the people I've seen on other forums and discussions blasting JMJ and their security people for sticking to their no re-entry policy and not allowing Morgan back in recognizing she was obviously alone and impaired and in potential danger are the same ones defending the friends' actions. JMJ security didn't know Morgan. They didn't know she'd been drinking, how much or for how long. They didn't know she was 2-3 hours from home. They didn't know she had no keys to her car. They didn't know there was a sober friend inside the arena who'd been designated to drive them all home safely. Yet there's been plenty of blame thrown at these total strangers for not being mind-readers and allowing her to re-enter the arena.

But you're absolutely right. These are adults, not 5 year olds. So I would have expected them to act like adults.

 

[Calliope]

Is this a generational thing?

I did my share of partying when I was that age. I've had friends who were in somewhat similar circumstances (meaning separated) but we made sure we were all together in the end and everyone made it home ok (or was safe wherever they spent the night). In fact, it hasn't been that long ago that a friend who'd accompanied us out one night refused to leave and insisted she'd get a ride home. We took her to the car and drove her home, with her *****ing and complaining the whole way. There was no way on God's green earth we were leaving her there alone, and she didn't live 2-3 hours away either. Sure she was angry, but she got over it.

I just don't understand.

 

[Roselvr]

On the FM board they are talking about when the forensic evidence comes back.

fwiw.. it could show nothing. If anyone is following the Jody Rilee-Wilson case linked in my sig; you know that her body was too badly decomposed to show anything.

A lot of the stories have been removed.. here is the google cache of one - link -

~Snip

An autopsy determined she had been dragged through the woods after she died but was unable to identify the cause of death because her body was badly decomposed.

Here's a better link - Oklahoma autopsy of former Roxbury woman inconclusive

~Snip

“Much of what was in there, I already knew,” Jim Rilee said. “I’m very upset with this.”

.

 

[Calliope]

Yeah, you're right. If (as indicated by Gil's haunting blogs) there was nothing left but skeleton, they may never know the true cause of death. I'm praying there was enough evidence where they found her to lead LE in the right direction. But I'm beginning to suspect they have little to work with, other than the location and their belief that the person is connected to or has knowledge of that farm.

 

[LLLindsayy]

I hope I can say this without you folks criticizing me or my generation

I'm from the same class as Morgan. High school graduate 2007, college 2011. I went to high school all the way through senior year in Virginia, though I didn't know Morgan.

I'm unsure if you guys are aware of how common it is for students to go to these various major colleges from all of the high schools in the state. Judging by my Facebook (because I'd never be able to count), I know no less than 25 people who went to Virginia Tech. No less than 15 who went to JMU, and no less than 7 who went to UVA. UVA is a more "elite" school and is tough to get into, followed by VT, and then JMU.

If I was on one of these campuses I'd have no problem contacting someone I know. I couldn't be sure I'd "bump into" one of them per chance, but I'd definitely be able to text one of them if I needed a place to chill for a while. I'm convinced the same situation applied to Morgan.

I'm sure that if I was currently in college in VA I'd know even more students than what I know from high school alone.

That said, if I was with a group of friends on one of these campuses and one of my friends said she was leaving us to go hang out with another friend (essentially what Morgan's friends thought she was doing when she said she'd find a ride) I'd probably say, "Oh, who?" But I don't know if I'd NOT let her go. If she didn't specify a person, I'd probably just assume that she had numbers in her cell phone to people she could call.

I may even text said friend a bit later to see if she found a ride. If she didn't reply, I'd assume she was busy partying or hanging out with a guy. I probably wouldn't try again until the next morning if I didn't hear back from her.

I think that may clear up some things about Morgan's friends letting her walk away.

The next morning if I'd still not heard back from friend, I'd assume that she had partied hard and fell asleep. Would I be concerned? Being completely realistic, I'm not sure I'd be very concerned until later in the afternoon the following day. Why? Because my friends do this kind of thing all the time.

Because of the fact that Morgan's friend had her car and her keys, I'm not sure I can provide an accurate scenario for how I'd react. This has never happened to me, because I think that if someone was supposed to be DD, they'd take their own car. Maybe the DD didn't have his own car? I don't know. All of the people I know my age do.

I can only imagine acting the same way I described above. If I was Morgan I'd think, "Well, I don't want to hang out around here and be bored, and I do know people around, so I'll text one of them or hope I find one of them. I don't want my friends to be left without a ride, so I'll leave the car with them. And the only reason I'm gonna text them to let them know I found a ride is so they don't wait around thinking I need my car."

Morgan's friends probably didn't give it a second thought because, even thought hindsight is 20/20, they are college kids and they feel safe on college campuses. They trust their own.

Changing the circumstances up a bit, if we were somewhere Morgan knew no one and we were a while away from our homes, I probably would not be OK with her leaving us. I would probably follow her myself so she wasn't waiting around alone. Or I'd make one of our guy friends go.

Maybe Morgan had another group of friends at the concert. In fact, she probably did.

Please don't talk down to me. I'm just trying to help you guys with how "this generation's" 20 year olds think

 

[part time prof]

I hope I can say this without you folks criticizing me or my generation

I'm from the same class as Morgan. High school graduate 2007, college 2011. I went to high school all the way through senior year in Virginia, though I didn't know Morgan.

I'm unsure if you guys are aware of how common it is for students to go to these various major colleges from all of the high schools in the state. Judging by my Facebook (because I'd never be able to count), I know no less than 25 people who went to Virginia Tech. No less than 15 who went to JMU, and no less than 7 who went to UVA. UVA is a more "elite" school and is tough to get into, followed by VT, and then JMU.

If I was on one of these campuses I'd have no problem contacting someone I know. I couldn't be sure I'd "bump into" one of them per chance, but I'd definitely be able to text one of them if I needed a place to chill for a while. I'm convinced the same situation applied to Morgan.

I'm sure that if I was currently in college in VA I'd know even more students than what I know from high school alone.

That said, if I was with a group of friends on one of these campuses and one of my friends said she was leaving us to go hang out with another friend (essentially what Morgan's friends thought she was doing when she said she'd find a ride) I'd probably say, "Oh, who?" But I don't know if I'd NOT let her go. If she didn't specify a person, I'd probably just assume that she had numbers in her cell phone to people she could call.

I may even text said friend a bit later to see if she found a ride. If she didn't reply, I'd assume she was busy partying or hanging out with a guy. I probably wouldn't try again until the next morning if I didn't hear back from her.

I think that may clear up some things about Morgan's friends letting her walk away.

The next morning if I'd still not heard back from friend, I'd assume that she had partied hard and fell asleep. Would I be concerned? Being completely realistic, I'm not sure I'd be very concerned until later in the afternoon the following day. Why? Because my friends do this kind of thing all the time.

Because of the fact that Morgan's friend had her car and her keys, I'm not sure I can provide an accurate scenario for how I'd react. This has never happened to me, because I think that if someone was supposed to be DD, they'd take their own car. Maybe the DD didn't have his own car? I don't know. All of the people I know my age do.

I can only imagine acting the same way I described above. If I was Morgan I'd think, "Well, I don't want to hang out around here and be bored, and I do know people around, so I'll text one of them or hope I find one of them. I don't want my friends to be left without a ride, so I'll leave the car with them. And the only reason I'm gonna text them to let them know I found a ride is so they don't wait around thinking I need my car."

Morgan's friends probably didn't give it a second thought because, even thought hindsight is 20/20, they are college kids and they feel safe on college campuses. They trust their own.

Changing the circumstances up a bit, if we were somewhere Morgan knew no one and we were a while away from our homes, I probably would not be OK with her leaving us. I would probably follow her myself so she wasn't waiting around alone. Or I'd make one of our guy friends go.

Maybe Morgan had another group of friends at the concert. In fact, she probably did.

Please don't talk down to me. I'm just trying to help you guys with how "this generation's" 20 year olds think

Thanks for this perspective. I think there is a generational difference, as another poster asked about. I have a 20-something former dogsitter who this reminds me a lot of; she is now traveling solo around the world for a year, confident she can handle anything that comes her way.

With regard to Morgan, I agree with all of your points and suppositions above, but for the part about texting, since after 8:48 she apparently texted only with the young man some distance away who has been cleared by LE.

This doesn't say she didn't borrow someone's phone to contact someone local, but whose number would she have memorized (assuming her phone was already sans battery)?

Argues for a stranger or someone she had just met (even if briefly), imoo.

 

[LLLindsayy]

Thanks for this perspective. I think there is a generational difference, as another poster asked about. I have a 20-something former dogsitter who this reminds me a lot of; she is now traveling solo around the world for a year, confident she can handle anything that comes her way.

With regard to Morgan, I agree with all of your points and suppositions above, but for the part about texting, since after 8:48 she apparently texted only with the young man some distance away who has been cleared by LE.

This doesn't say she didn't borrow someone's phone to contact someone local, but whose number would she have memorized (assuming her phone was already sans battery)?

Argues for a stranger or someone she had just met (even if briefly), imoo.

I do wonder what she and the young man were talking about, but I'm sure we'll never find out. I wonder if she was already with someone she was comfortable with?

To be completely honest with you, I only have memorized phone numbers of people whose numbers I knew before I had a cell phone. I've been dating my boyfriend for 2 years and I have to think about his number. Sometimes if I get lucky, I'll get the numbers in the right order. I so very rarely need a number when my cell isn't handy. I really only know my parents' number.

I wonder if Morgan texted anyone we don't know about.

I wonder if Morgan did bump into someone she knew. With so many college kids in that centralized location for the concert, I'm sure someone she knew was there. That would explain the lack of texting to other people.

 

[part time prof]

I do wonder what she and the young man were talking about, but I'm sure we'll never find out. I wonder if she was already with someone she was comfortable with?

To be completely honest with you, I only have memorized phone numbers of people whose numbers I knew before I had a cell phone. I've been dating my boyfriend for 2 years and I have to think about his number. Sometimes if I get lucky, I'll get the numbers in the right order. I so very rarely need a number when my cell isn't handy. I really only know my parents' number.

I wonder if Morgan texted anyone we don't know about.

I wonder if Morgan did bump into someone she knew. With so many college kids in that centralized location for the concert, I'm sure someone she knew was there. That would explain the lack of texting to other people.

Agree with you the odds are very high she knew someone at UVA...whether from social networking, high school(s), her brothers' friends, concert attendees from JMU or Tech, even family friends from 10 years prior (when they lived in C'ville). ETA: But if concert goers, who would be outside during Metallica? And, again assuming no working cell phone, whose number would she know by heart?

LE and DH have said she only texted with one person after 8:48, and iirc that was about the nature of the events of the night so far (ousted from concert, presumably, but what else? Plans of any kind for what was next, given the situation?).

Also, did she text anyone before 8:48 phone call? I don't think that's relevant, as I believe she mistakenly exited, honestly tried to get in, and then went looking (for what, I still don't know, but I guess a ride...to where I don't know, but I guess JMU?).

Morgan wandered enough that she seemingly wasn't going anywhere specific to meet up with someone (unless the Copeley/Ivy intersection was pre-arranged, but its location wasn't specifically known to her so she was asking directions in her brief interaction, and she held out her thumb once she saw a familiar car/face).

All moo.

 

[LadyBug99]

I hope I can say this without you folks criticizing me or my generation

I'm from the same class as Morgan. High school graduate 2007, college 2011. I went to high school all the way through senior year in Virginia, though I didn't know Morgan.

I'm unsure if you guys are aware of how common it is for students to go to these various major colleges from all of the high schools in the state. Judging by my Facebook (because I'd never be able to count), I know no less than 25 people who went to Virginia Tech. No less than 15 who went to JMU, and no less than 7 who went to UVA. UVA is a more "elite" school and is tough to get into, followed by VT, and then JMU.

If I was on one of these campuses I'd have no problem contacting someone I know. I couldn't be sure I'd "bump into" one of them per chance, but I'd definitely be able to text one of them if I needed a place to chill for a while. I'm convinced the same situation applied to Morgan.

I'm sure that if I was currently in college in VA I'd know even more students than what I know from high school alone.

That said, if I was with a group of friends on one of these campuses and one of my friends said she was leaving us to go hang out with another friend (essentially what Morgan's friends thought she was doing when she said she'd find a ride) I'd probably say, "Oh, who?" But I don't know if I'd NOT let her go. If she didn't specify a person, I'd probably just assume that she had numbers in her cell phone to people she could call.

I may even text said friend a bit later to see if she found a ride. If she didn't reply, I'd assume she was busy partying or hanging out with a guy. I probably wouldn't try again until the next morning if I didn't hear back from her.

I think that may clear up some things about Morgan's friends letting her walk away.

The next morning if I'd still not heard back from friend, I'd assume that she had partied hard and fell asleep. Would I be concerned? Being completely realistic, I'm not sure I'd be very concerned until later in the afternoon the following day. Why? Because my friends do this kind of thing all the time.

Because of the fact that Morgan's friend had her car and her keys, I'm not sure I can provide an accurate scenario for how I'd react. This has never happened to me, because I think that if someone was supposed to be DD, they'd take their own car. Maybe the DD didn't have his own car? I don't know. All of the people I know my age do.

I can only imagine acting the same way I described above. If I was Morgan I'd think, "Well, I don't want to hang out around here and be bored, and I do know people around, so I'll text one of them or hope I find one of them. I don't want my friends to be left without a ride, so I'll leave the car with them. And the only reason I'm gonna text them to let them know I found a ride is so they don't wait around thinking I need my car."

Morgan's friends probably didn't give it a second thought because, even thought hindsight is 20/20, they are college kids and they feel safe on college campuses. They trust their own.

Changing the circumstances up a bit, if we were somewhere Morgan knew no one and we were a while away from our homes, I probably would not be OK with her leaving us. I would probably follow her myself so she wasn't waiting around alone. Or I'd make one of our guy friends go.

Maybe Morgan had another group of friends at the concert. In fact, she probably did.

Please don't talk down to me. I'm just trying to help you guys with how "this generation's" 20 year olds think

I just want to thank you for a great post! I personally found nothing unusual about the behavior of Morgan or her friends that night. And perhaps this is a generational thing, however I think bashing Morgan's friends is wrong. I can't begin to imagine how horrible Amy and Sarah feel. It almost seems as though people are moving the focus from the real killer and placing the blame directly on them. Here people are bringing up dozens of scenarios about what "should have" happened that night. I wholeheartedly think that these "what ifs" will haunt them for the rest of their lives.

The only thing I wanted to add was the fact that Morgan made no contact with her friends after 8:48, would have left me to believe that she was fine and off doing her own thing. I know that this was due to the fact that Morgan had lost the battery to her phone, but looking at this from the friend's perspective, Never in a million years would I think that my friend had been murdered.

JMO

 

[carbuff]

Kids who bother to use a designated driver at all take the responsibility and the situation seriously. One of the things they're taught in driver's ed, school anti-drunk-driving campaigns, and parent and teacher lectures (at least around here) is, you do not under any circumstances give the keys back to the drunk person. The drunk person may say they're just going to get a coat out of the car, or whatever, but if they're impaired to any degree, they don't have the judgement to stick with what they said. They might decide, "Oh, while I'm here, I'll just pop over to 7-11 for more beer for the crowd" and wrap their car around a power pole at 70mph, as a couple of girls near here did a few years back when their designated driver let them have the keys for just a few minutes.

So, yeah, her friends did the right thing. They did what you're supposed to do. Drunk driving accidents are a lot more common than running into rapists/murderers on what's supposed to be a safe campus, where they all know lots of people. Yeah, it turned out wrong, but that doesn't mean the decision was wrong.

 

[LogicalMinds]

LLLindsay...thanks for your insights

I so agree..these kids were not going to that concert to babysit Morgan

as far as her leaving, we don't even know if she told them where she was going or why...alll the "meeting someone" is purely internet speculation
she may have been going to ladies room, to smoke or to meet someone...
a kiss on the cheek?? JMO youthful exageration and high spirits

as far as texting them or calling them...I think the lost battery, unusable cell phone was the real problem....I don't even know phone numbers anymore, or carry a phone book...no one does really..all the numbers are in our cell phones

when she called the friend/s at 8:48 they suggested various ways to get back in, different exits ...and she said she would try also if not she would be ok and get a ride

remember too..loud, heavy metal, lights , huge crowd...so hard to talk..and after than she did NOT answer her phone, did not text them ...

for those who still feel "I would have left and helped her"...I am asking again exactly HOW you would do that?? They didn't know which "gate" Morgan was at...and they had told her to try the various ones so had NO idea where she would be....could not get hold of her on the phone

"throw the keys"...oh please....in a huge crowded arena, music, lights crowds...;pick one of the exits and go over and throw the keys?? then they all would be stuck

I agree with Llllindsey....friends hook up...and no one wants to be judge and jury on them....they had NO way of knowning that she "couldn't" call...they probably thought she "didn't want" to call, she had either gotten back in and was with other friends, or found a friend and was having fun

It is rather ridiculous to imagine these girls were her watchdogs..they were all there to have fun, party and see a group they liked....hindsight is great

I still have not had one of the people who say "I would have left to help her" explain to me exactly how they would find her , at which exit/gate, where they would "throw the keys"....etc....they would have been unable to return to the arena themselves...and I don't see how they would have found Morgan

I don't see any "details">> cause it is just not practical or possible in a crowded situation like that. I have been to Theme Parks with friends (not kids) and to Festivals with friends and gotten seperated, they felt like going back to the hotel or leave early....I am not a big "texter" and neither are they but texting is good in those situations

but...her phone not working so didn't/couldn't text (or call)

This is NOT the same as when you take your kid to a concert, these are all "grown" young college people who have mind/will of their own....

IF Morgan was texting and/or calling and begging them "come to gate C, throw me the keys" and they refused...yeah then I would be upset and blame them

but that didn't happen

 

[part time prof]

Someone on findmorgan forum brought up the blue phones. I hadn't even considered those.

Blue Light Phones

There are more than 200 blue light phone in place around the University of Virginia. Telephones are in every dormitory, along frequently traveled sidewalks, and in parking lots. Some academic buildings also have phones. These phone dial directly into the University Police department. If you need assistance, just activate a blue phone and state the problem. A police officer will respond. Map of Blue Light Phones.

There are a number of them on the arena lot and Copley / 29.

Remember Morgan Harrington - View Single Post - Poi

Just to correct something I posted yesterday. Last night I checked the blue light phone closest to my office at UVA, and indeed it has only one button, which presumably connects directly to UVA police. There is a speaker that I was misremembering as a dialing pad. Sorry for any confusion. The fact remains Morgan didn't use one, at least that we are aware of.

 

[Calliope]

<snipped to answer specific points>



"throw the keys"...oh please....in a huge crowded arena, music, lights crowds...;pick one of the exits and go over and throw the keys?? then they all would be stuck

I don't believe anyone has suggested the DD toss the keys randomly into the crowd or out the door. C'mon now...

I still have not had one of the people who say "I would have left to help her" explain to me exactly how they would find her , at which exit/gate, where they would "throw the keys"....etc....they would have been unable to return to the arena themselves...and I don't see how they would have found Morgan

MH: "I'm outside the arena and can't get back in."

Friends: "Which gate?"

MH: "I don't know"

Friends: "Stay right there, we're coming" (or) "Ask the security guy which gate it is..."

Friends: *walk out and check each entrance*

but...her phone not working so didn't/couldn't text (or call)

How do you know?

This is NOT the same as when you take your kid to a concert, these are all "grown" young college people who have mind/will of their own....

IF Morgan was texting and/or calling and begging them "come to gate C, throw me the keys" and they refused...yeah then I would be upset and blame them

but that didn't happen

How do you know?

 

[Javabean]

I think this will be my last post on the sybject of the "friends" as I find this topic extremely frustrating. First off, I don't think the friends in any way hurt Morgan or are covering up anything that happened to her. There is a murderer out there that needs to be caught, and he/she is the one responsible for hurting Morgan. But that is not what this particular post is about.

What would I have done differently as morgan's friend that night? I will tell you. If my friend, who had eagerly waited six months for a show, suddenly ended up outside the venue, my first question to her would be "What happened?? How did you end up outside??" Then, I would have gotten off my rear end, asked her which gate she was at, and either a) given her the keys so she could be in the car (assuming she was sober) or b) gone to the gate to see ask her what happened and arrange some place to meet afterwards. It seems like a lot of people are saying (not just on these boards), "You didn't expect them to stop the PARTTTY did you???"

As I've previously mentioned, it is not just that night that makes me frustrated with Morgan's friends. It is how two weeks later, they post public Facebook photos of themselves drunk, partying and dressed as "zombies" etc. Dear god is there no shame? I'm tired of people saying "Oh, it's a generational thing" because honestly, common decency is what comes into play here. You don't have a party like that two weeks after your friend goes missing. You just don't. I would probably have been in shock still, doing everything I could to help find my friend. A Halloween part would be the absolute LAST thing on my mind.

This is my opinion only. It's the last thing I will say on the subject due to my frustration. I will say that this case has made me completely appreciate the friends that I have.

 

[Calliope]

I think this will be my last post on the sybject of the "friends" as I find this topic extremely frustrating. First off, I don't think the friends in any way hurt Morgan or are covering up anything that happened to her. There is a murderer out there that needs to be caught, and he/she is the one responsible for hurting Morgan. But that is not what this particular post is about.

What would I have done differently as morgan's friend that night? I will tell you. If my friend, who had eagerly waited six months for a show, suddenly ended up outside the venue, my first question to her would be "What happened?? How did you end up outside??" Then, I would have gotten off my rear end, asked her which gate she was at, and either a) given her the keys so she could be in the car (assuming she was sober) or b) gone to the gate to see ask her what happened and arrange some place to meet afterwards. It seems like a lot of people are saying (not just on these boards), "You didn't expect them to stop the PARTTTY did you???"

Amen.

As I've previously mentioned, it is not just that night that makes me frustrated with Morgan's friends. It is how two weeks later, they post public Facebook photos of themselves drunk, partying and dressed as "zombies" etc. Dear god is there no shame? I'm tired of people saying "Oh, it's a generational thing" because honestly, common decency is what comes into play here. You don't have a party like that two weeks after your friend goes missing. You just don't. I would probably have been in shock still, doing everything I could to help find my friend. A Halloween part would be the absolute LAST thing on my mind.

This is my opinion only. It's the last thing I will say on the subject due to my frustration. I will say that this case has made me completely appreciate the friends that I have.

And amen.

 

[LadyBug99]

I think this will be my last post on the sybject of the "friends" as I find this topic extremely frustrating. First off, I don't think the friends in any way hurt Morgan or are covering up anything that happened to her. There is a murderer out there that needs to be caught, and he/she is the one responsible for hurting Morgan. But that is not what this particular post is about.

What would I have done differently as morgan's friend that night? I will tell you. If my friend, who had eagerly waited six months for a show, suddenly ended up outside the venue, my first question to her would be "What happened?? How did you end up outside??" Then, I would have gotten off my rear end, asked her which gate she was at, and either a) given her the keys so she could be in the car (assuming she was sober) or b) gone to the gate to see ask her what happened and arrange some place to meet afterwards. It seems like a lot of people are saying (not just on these boards), "You didn't expect them to stop the PARTTTY did you???"

As I've previously mentioned, it is not just that night that makes me frustrated with Morgan's friends. It is how two weeks later, they post public Facebook photos of themselves drunk, partying and dressed as "zombies" etc. Dear god is there no shame? I'm tired of people saying "Oh, it's a generational thing" because honestly, common decency is what comes into play here. You don't have a party like that two weeks after your friend goes missing. You just don't. I would probably have been in shock still, doing everything I could to help find my friend. A Halloween part would be the absolute LAST thing on my mind.

This is my opinion only. It's the last thing I will say on the subject due to my frustration. I will say that this case has made me completely appreciate the friends that I have.

With all due respect this is based on what you would do in this situation. This is also based on the one or two statements that LE put out. I believe that there was more to the conversation with friends that LE knows about. Sadly we do not.

Also, I will go onto say that I personally have dealt with the loss of a sibling and numerous friends. I may have handled some loses better than others. I would NOT want someone casting judgment on me because I did not grieve or cope properly. And that is just the world we live in. Everyone is different...we are not robots that act and think the same.

I do agree with you that it's stories like this that make you appreciate the love and support of your own friends and families.

 

[LogicalMinds]

I don't believe anyone has suggested the DD toss the keys randomly into the crowd or out the door. C'mon now...




MH: "I'm outside the arena and can't get back in."

Friends: "Which gate?"

MH: "I don't know"

Friends: "Stay right there, we're coming" (or) "Ask the security guy which gate it is..."

Friends: *walk out and check each entrance*


Umm....she was going to try to get back in, apparently she and her friends did NOT know the rules there....
you are also expecting a whole lot of people who were partying

They would have expected her to try to get in and if she had trouble call them back...she never called back and never answered the phone (battery gone?)

what if they were sick, lost...Morgan was NO help to them was she??
if you hold them accountable, you need to hold her accoutable JMO

How do you know?



How do you know?

How do YOU know?? None of us know much...we do know that she called at 8:48 and said she was outside, they suggested ways to get back in, she said she would or get a ride....

that is all we know

her parents are ok with the friends...so they must have said what needed to be said....as far as giving the keys..any "designated driver" info will tell you to never do that

hindsight is great..but really woulda coulda shoulda doesn't matter all that much.

 

[LogicalMinds]

Whatever they did afterwards has no relationship to what happened that night

No matter what they did/are doing now it does not change the fact that they had one quick call from Morgan. It is not as if she was calling back and begging them to help her out etc...she didn't call back

she didn't answer her phone

they are kids, they were partying, they were not responsible for her

I have yet to see anyone give the opposite idea....was Morgan responsible for them?
No

and they were not responsible for her

I am sure they have regrets and wish they had done different things
but hindsight could be used on everyone and everything

In just about every case on these boards one could easily "solve" every "case" with hindsight

"leave that abusive jerk"...."take the kids away from these people"...."don't go jogging there alone"...."press charges, don't take him back"...."don't leave that bar with those guys"...."grandparents should have had custody"..."they needed to be in a mental hospital"..."parole board should never have let him out"

Yeah...they should have stopped those guys at the airport on 9/11

JFK should have used a bulletproof limo in Dallas and so on and so on

You know...when you get right down to it, many of the "victims" (adults)on these cases had many options that would have "saved" them that they choose not to take

 

[Calliope]

Umm....she was going to try to get back in, apparently she and her friends did NOT know the rules there....

It's been verified by people who've been there the policy is posted at the arena and elsewhere. But regardless, they knew the rules once she called and told them she was stranded outside.

you are also expecting a whole lot of people who were partying

Huh?

They would have expected her to try to get in and if she had trouble call them back...she never called back and never answered the phone (battery gone?)

How much time passed before they attempted to contact her? And btw, you wanted to know what they should have done and I told you. When she calls that she's stuck outside, tell her to stay put at the entrance and go to her. Simple. Dare I say... logical.

what if they were sick, lost...Morgan was NO help to them was she??
if you hold them accountable, you need to hold her accoutable JMO

Nice strawman.

How do YOU know?? None of us know much...we do know that she called at 8:48 and said she was outside, they suggested ways to get back in, she said she would or get a ride....

that is all we know

We know they didn't get off their butts and go to her. We know they left Charlottesville in her car.

her parents are ok with the friends...so they must have said what needed to be said....as far as giving the keys..any "designated driver" info will tell you to never do that

If she was impaired, of course not. That's when they leave the arena, pissed as they may be, and take care that their friend isn't outside alone in the cold with no way into the arena or her car.

hindsight is great..but really woulda coulda shoulda doesn't matter all that much.

Well I'll bet ya one thing. Anyone who has heard of or follows this case will think twice before leaving a friend in such a situation.

I agree with Java. This discussion is pointless really. The more I think about it, the angrier I get and no one is changing anyone's mind so I'll just shut up on the subject of the friends for now.