WA - Four killed in Pilchuk High School shooting, Marysville, 24 Oct 2014

[Shelby1]

I saw references to diabetes, but I didn't realize Jaylen had it. I thought maybe it was in tribute to a family member. I probably missed that info.

 

[Frigga]

The NA community is incredibly forgiving and compassionate, and I think that will go a long way toward healing. JF was NA, as were those who were shot. If the NA community can forgive, who are we to judge?

Shelby, I am in no way trying to put you down for your feelings! Please understand that! I admire your compassion. I am normally a very loving, empathic person but for some reason can't find it in this circumstance. I appreciate NA traditions and their cultural beliefs- I find them extremely noble- I just don't know why I am feeling the way I am. Someone mentioned earlier up thread about the Amish communities response to the shooter being similar and while I admire the sentiment and in some intellectual way understand it, I can't personally muster it here. I was wondering if I was the only one?

 

[Shelby1]

Frigga, I felt NO empathy towards the shooter in the Amish school. NONE. I am really at a loss to explain how I feel about Jaylen. I really am.

 

[Frigga]

Oops, quoted the wrong post but Trino, I admire your compassion, as well!

 

[mnegri1973]

Again, I'm sorry, no one having a bad thing to say about him previously doesn't change what he did. He murdered two other children and attempted to murder three others. I am really at a loss on this one.

I'm right there with you. I think maybe I'm just a cold person when it comes to crimes like this but I do not feel compassion for the shooter. This kid, yes he was a kid, but he is old enough to know right from wrong. I'm having a hard time understanding how we are still hearing reports that this is linked to a racist slur or he was being bullied. He was suspended for punching and breaking his cousins nose. And excuse me if I don't feel bad for the shooter being suspended for this act. As many reports have stated he was the "golden boy" who would one day possibly be a tribal leader. This next bit is IMO, but it doesn't seem like he was use to being told no. He wanted the girl, who rejected him but not his cousin. So he decided to take them out. I also have my doubts that he purposely took his own life. Several accounts from kids in the cafeteria stated that the teacher grabbed his arm causing him to jerk upwards. Again, IMO, the gun went off accidentally.

This is a sad situation for all involved and while I may not have compassion for the shooter, I do for his family. Do I think signs were missed, yes. But that does not make me blame his family. I really do hope LE will find out the why as the community needs this I think. I also hope that everyone in that community talks to the grief counselors that will be there. I have said it before and I will say it again, those kids need help.

Mel


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[possumheart]

I saw references to diabetes, but I didn't realize Jaylen had it. I thought maybe it was in tribute to a family member. I probably missed that info.

Yes he commented on Facebook that he was feeling down and unwell and one of the comments was from someone who comforted him saying they had a relative with diabetes too. It is more common amongst Native Americans, and they are starting to see type 2 diabetes in children rather than juvenile diabetes in recent years. As Jaylen wasn't an obese inactive kid, this was probably quite unexpected. I have read articles about depression associated with the lifestyle/dietary changes that newly diagnosed diabetics find humiliating in social settings. I also saw a photo on social media of Jaylen sleeping in class. It is not uncommon for diabetics to want a nap after a meal.
I am fairly sure I also saw a comment on Facebook or twitter where Jaylen was lamenting his blood sugar at night and someone suggesting that he get a refrigerator in his room to keep snickers bars in. It is obviously a big adjustment to make, learning how to look after yourself with diabetes, something I thankfully haven't had to go through. It would cut right through that delusion you have in your mid teens that you are invincible. Also a lot of the kids at his school seem to smoke hooch and talk about having the munchies on social media. I know that marijuana messes up your blood sugar, so that would be another social hurdle. Alienating.
MOO

 

[Rallibella]

The premeditation aspect of this shocks me. I guess I had thought they were eating lunch and one of them said something that upset him. I had read conflicting stories as to whether he was sitting with them or had come in separately, but this makes more sense now in terms of the latter. It is just shocking to me that his cousins and these girls had wronged him to a point he thought this was the right answer.

 

[NoUserName789]

so I discovered that his ex-gf (and recent gf) did go to another school and is not any of the girls that have been mentioned in media reports. What is interesting is to go to her FB and see very very recent pictures, videos, posts, comments. So I guess I do see the picture of what happened there but still don't totally 100% get why he was so angry at his friends. I get it but not to the degree that I originally thought b/c his girl friend was NOT one of those girls in the group.

 

[NoUserName789]

it's shocking b/c things in life can turn from good to bad so fast. But they can also turn from bad to good so fast. Why did he have to react so quickly???

things could have gotten better very soon. his happy posts were very recent in october on her fb.

 

[mnegri1973]

so I discovered that his ex-gf (and recent gf) did go to another school and is not any of the girls that have been mentioned in media reports. What is interesting is to go to her FB and see very very recent pictures, videos, posts, comments. So I guess I do see the picture of what happened there but still don't totally 100% get why he was so angry at his friends. I get it but not to the degree that I originally thought b/c his girl friend was NOT one of those girls in the group.

I think that he may have broke up with his GF however I think he also liked the girl his cousin was dating and it was this girl that turned him down and was the reason he got into a fist fight with his cousin.

It just blows my mind that these kids are so young yet talking about being in relationships and having sex. Very eye opening to see into their lives thru their social media.

Mel


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[Shelby1]

Yeah, times have sure changed since I was 14.

 

[Curious Guy]

Oops, quoted the wrong post but Trino, I admire your compassion, as well!

Yes compassion is an admirable trait to possess. I often have it for sufferers of domestic abuse that kill their abusive spouses. Just don't have in it me to feel it for this guy. He had a plan, lured these poor innocent children into a situation they couldn't escape and executed them. And cowardly at that. He couldn't even face them. All because his feelings were hurt.

There is no excuse that can explain that away for me.

On a side note I do not remember much empathy for Harris and Klebold. Is it because of his looks? Being an athlete? His popularity ? I find it very perplexing.

 

[LaborDayRN]

There are stages of grief. I think the community is remembering the shooter the way he was prior to Friday and not what he became. I wonder...did he take the gun or any weapon to school on previous day and change his mind?

I think you have a point, as far as his classmates go. He was popular and in their eyes he still is. I think when all is said and done, in time they will see that J was NOT a nice guy. A nice guy wouldn't do this. This is a message that our children need to understand! This is not the behavior of a nice person! We have all been hurt in our youth. How many of us then took a loaded weapon to school, gathered all of our friends in one spot (friends and family members) and shot them from the back at point blank range. Has anyone read about these injuries? They could't even positively identify these kids for hours. They were so disfigured! I won't go into detail but I'd be surprised if the other victims will come out of this physically unscathed. Never mind the emotional trauma.......

I've been reading and posting here at WS for quite a while. I have seen many youth offenders and people are up in arms over their crimes. It seems that when the perpetrator is a "loner" or "weird" people (in general, not at WS) are ready to hang em high. Austin Sig comes to mind. But this kid, J was "popular" and "nice". Why should we feel differently when the horror of this persons actions are equally as detestable. How many abusive spouses have been described as nice? They may appear nice to the outside world but when they are pummeling their partner they are certainly not nice.

I guess I just needed to get this off my chest. I want all those kids that went to school with J to understand and not receive mixed messages. They may have thought he was nice, but his actions say differently. My mom always told me, "actions speak louder that words".

All of this of course, is my opinion only.

 

[LaborDayRN]

Yes compassion is an admirable trait to possess. I often have it for sufferers of domestic abuse that kill their abusive spouses. Just don't have in it me to feel it for this guy. He had a plan, lured these poor innocent children into a situation they couldn't escape and executed them. And cowardly at that. He couldn't even face them. All because his feelings were hurt.

There is no excuse that can explain that away for me.

On a side note I do not remember much empathy for Harris and Klebold. Is it because of his looks? Being an athlete? His popularity ? I find it very perplexing.

BBM: This ^^

 

[WichitaFalls]

I'm right there with you. I think maybe I'm just a cold person when it comes to crimes like this but I do not feel compassion for the shooter. This kid, yes he was a kid, but he is old enough to know right from wrong. I'm having a hard time understanding how we are still hearing reports that this is linked to a racist slur or he was being bullied. He was suspended for punching and breaking his cousins nose. And excuse me if I don't feel bad for the shooter being suspended for this act. As many reports have stated he was the "golden boy" who would one day possibly be a tribal leader. This next bit is IMO, but it doesn't seem like he was use to being told no. He wanted the girl, who rejected him but not his cousin. So he decided to take them out. I also have my doubts that he purposely took his own life. Several accounts from kids in the cafeteria stated that the teacher grabbed his arm causing him to jerk upwards. Again, IMO, the gun went off accidentally.

This is a sad situation for all involved and while I may not have compassion for the shooter, I do for his family. Do I think signs were missed, yes. But that does not make me blame his family. I really do hope LE will find out the why as the community needs this I think. I also hope that everyone in that community talks to the grief counselors that will be there. I have said it before and I will say it again, those kids need help.

Mel


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk HD

I also don't feel any compassion for the shooter. This was an execution, not a momentary lapse into violent anger, a moment of passion, or an accident. No one, no matter background, disappointments, childhood issues, health issues, nothing excuses a cold blooded execution.

It occurs to me that lots of people (young and old) were flat out wrong about J's character.

 

[Tink56]

Fryberg sent a selfie to his ex-girlfriend showing himself holding a gun not long before the attack, a law enforcement official told CNN. It is unclear if it is the same .40 caliber pistol used in the deadly shootings.

http://www.cnn.com/2014/10/27/us/washington-school-shooting/index.html?hpt=hp_t1

 

[Sweet Tooth]

I stated earlier on this thread that I cannot put my finger on why I feel so much for Jaylen AS WELL as Zoe, Gia, Nathan, Andrew and Shaylee. Maybe it's because I've read so many tweets from the tribe and outside the tribe. I'm almost 30 years older than these kids so maybe I just can't wrap my mind around it all..........

Shelby, I want to say I understand what you are saying and why you are saying it. I just spent most of the weekend on the T site (and I do not even have an account) - so much so that I almost feel as though I know all of these children personally. Not just those that were injured or killed but all of their friends and family members too. I can't seem to help feeling compassion for Jaylen even though I never knew him and while at the same time I am mourning for the ones who died and worrying about those still struggling to live. But his friends loved him so very much and they just seem unable to accept this terrible thing he has done. They continue to love him no matter what. It has affected me deeply. Even the one boy who is now in stable condition forgives Jaylen and loves him still. I can't pretend to understand it but there it is. It is just too difficult for me to read all of their loving thoughts towards him and not feel compassion for them and for him.

I don't for a minute dismiss what he did, nor do I understand it. I'm usually a pretty understanding person. I can even accept that he may have wanted to die himself. But I have a hard time accepting someone taking other people with them. (Unless of course, it is an abuser - I understand that situation more.) I do feel he planned this in a very cold blooded way. He was a skilled hunter and comfortable with guns. He knew what he was going to do and he did it. I think in rapid fire succession he shot each victim and the boy with the jaw injury must have been on the end and maybe started to turn his head at the gun shot sounds and that is what saved him. I have very little compassion for that person standing there pulling the trigger. That was not the well-loved Jaylen that they all knew. At that moment he had become someone else.

And I think that the compassion that I feel towards him is for the person he was, the one all of his friends remember so lovingly. I can't understand why he targeted all 3 girls or both boys. I could maybe understand it more if it was one boy and one girl (or I could try to understand it more). For some reason, in his head, he decided they all needed to die. These were all lovely young people who loved and laughed and had so much life left to live. My heart just breaks over this tragedy.

I just wanted to say that I understand your feelings and that I have them too. I don't understand it and wish so desperately that someone had noticed him having problems earlier and stepped in and some how avoided this horrible scene. I wish he had reached out to someone - there must have been some understanding adult available somewhere, or at least I want to believe that.

 

[Shelby1]

Shelby, I want to say I understand what you are saying and why you are saying it. I just spent most of the weekend on the T site (and I do not even have an account) - so much so that I almost feel as though I know all of these children personally. Not just those that were injured or killed but all of their friends and family members too. I can't seem to help feeling compassion for Jaylen even though I never knew him and while at the same time I am mourning for the ones who died and worrying about those still struggling to live. But his friends loved him so very much and they just seem unable to accept this terrible thing he has done. They continue to love him no matter what. It has affected me deeply. Even the one boy who is now in stable condition forgives Jaylen and loves him still. I can't pretend to understand it but there it is. It is just too difficult for me to read all of their loving thoughts towards him and not feel compassion for them and for him.

I don't for a minute dismiss what he did, nor do I understand it. I'm usually a pretty understanding person. I can even accept that he may have wanted to die himself. But I have a hard time accepting someone taking other people with them. (Unless of course, it is an abuser - I understand that situation more.) I do feel he planned this in a very cold blooded way. He was a skilled hunter and comfortable with guns. He knew what he was going to do and he did it. I think in rapid fire succession he shot each victim and the boy with the jaw injury must have been on the end and maybe started to turn his head at the gun shot sounds and that is what saved him. I have very little compassion for that person standing there pulling the trigger. That was not the well-loved Jaylen that they all knew. At that moment he had become someone else.

And I think that the compassion that I feel towards him is for the person he was, the one all of his friends remember so lovingly. I can't understand why he targeted all 3 girls or both boys. I could maybe understand it more if it was one boy and one girl (or I could try to understand it more). For some reason, in his head, he decided they all needed to die. These were all lovely young people who loved and laughed and had so much life left to live. My heart just breaks over this tragedy.

I just wanted to say that I understand your feelings and that I have them too. I don't understand it and wish so desperately that someone had noticed him having problems earlier and stepped in and some how avoided this horrible scene. I wish he had reached out to someone - there must have been some understanding adult available somewhere, or at least I want to believe that.

You have captured all of what I've been trying to say.

 

[doubt]

years ago, when the amish girls were murdered in their schoolhouse, the country was dumbfounded at how those parents, despite their grief and anguish, were able to reach out to the killers family.

one of the ways that we, as adults, can help to bring the temperature down for our teenagers and for our world, is to stop getting bent out of shape when other people are big enough, deep enough, strong enough, wise enough....to be able to choose peace.

 

[possumheart]

years ago, when the amish girls were murdered in their schoolhouse, the country was dumbfounded at how those parents, despite their grief and anguish, were able to reach out to the killers family.

one of the ways that we, as adults, can help to bring the temperature down for our teenagers and for our world, is to stop getting bent out of shape when other people are big enough, deep enough, strong enough, wise enough....to be able to choose peace.

It would be so much easier to file Jaylen away in a box marked 'evil', and forget him. The hard path is to accept that he is part of the collective consciousness of the children and the community and to move through the healing process in an evolved way. The hard path is the right path.

MOO