IA with everyone’s post about the amount of stress/trauma this family faced in the early 90s.
This following slight clarification does not diminish your point that no family would be operating at optimum under these conditions. Beth died January 8, 1992. One and ½ years later PR was diagnosed with cancer early July of 1993; JB was 2 and 11 months, not quite 3, BR was 6 ½.
Going further, my brother who lost his oldest daughter to a health crisis, has told me he does not believe he will ever get over it, and the whole family suffers from this loss. The children witnessing the grief of their father, and the battle PR faced (the threat of death) would be deeply affected, and only God, perhaps people closest to the family, and the Rs doctors would know how this family dealt with it. moo
Thank you for the clarification. So, JonBenet was almost 3 yo, and Burke was ~6.5 yo.
Thank you, as well, for sharing a bit of your personal experience. I have not experienced the death of a child, and God-willing, my most ultimate desire is for my children to outlive me...
I've seen heart-break, but nothing like you've witnessed as an immediate family member. ...thank God.
I have seen my baby brother broken-hearted. Although, the comparison I'm about to make is incredibly inadequate, it's the closest association I can make. ...again, thank God.
He was in his early 20s, a division 1 athlete with professional athlete potential written all over his scouting reports. He was away @ school, and the young lady he thought he'd marry, abruptly ended their relationship that first semester. Four years, high school sweethearts, and suddenly thousands of miles apart; She began dating another semi well-known athlete in the area. He wasn't offered a scholarship to play baseball in the SEC, so he stuck around. As it turned out, she didn't feel like waiting @ home alone.
The devastation that overcame my little brother might have changed his entire path. Who knows where he'd be now, had it worked out? He had some big dreams & big shoes that might have taken him there...
It's been ~4 years and he's finally back on track, but goodness, I pulled a few all nighters talking to him on the phone because I feared I may not hear his voice again if I hung up...
It seems ridiculous now, but it was SO real. I know, it's hardly an appropriate comparison to that which your brother (& YOU) have experienced. My point is:
Seeing such sadness, hopelessness, defeat, & fear of the sudden unknown, in the eyes of the ones we love most, is disparaging, heart-wrenching...
I've cried on numerous occasions for my brother. ...& for my mother who couldn't "make it all better". ...& for my father who couldn't "fix it" for his wife, nor undo it for his little boy, etc.
Thus, Beth's death & Patsy's cancer (regardless of the family's imperfections/level of dysfunction) assuredly affected those children in an immeasurable capacity. Does this lend credence to RDI/IDI theories? I don't tend to go there as I do believe what doesn't kill us makes us stronger, but there's a lot of gray area in between...
Thanks, again, for your heart-felt post. You have my condolences, for the loss of your niece. :heartbeat: