But, when I was a trainer on DV, I dealt with the gender roles a bit differently.
I had the group compare and contrast the male leads in
Gone With the Wind and
Titanic. I used these because of their strong female characters (and because I love both movies :blushing
. That whole princess/prince thing didn't work for my audience in 1997. So, I wanted to show them how far we'd come, but how Intimate Partner Violence was what it was.
Now, with Rhett: He was ol' school, very sexy, and very powerful - a rake and a rough with women. It was not so much that he was abusive to Scarlett, but that her willful behavior and obsession with the weakling Ashley leads to her doom. Think about the night of the red dress. He sends her off to be humiliated at the party (after lecturing her about the virtues of the ever gentle and long-suffering, Melody), then he gets drunk and goes to brooding in the dark. Scarlett and he have it out, and he demonstrates that he could "crush" her head like a grape. Scarlett decides she's had enough and turns her back on him, but he swoops her up, climbs, the stairs, kicks open the bedroom door, and we can assume they spend a most exciting night. Talk about 50 Shades of the Old South! Abusive, marital rape? Whatever, we thought then might be seen quite differently today. In the end Scarlett sees the error of her stubborn ways, but it is too late and we are glad to see Rhett tell her he doesn't "give a damn" what becomes of her. Had it coming she did!
Fast forward to Rose, Jack, and Cal. Rose is "no picnic," to quote Jack, who sees herself being practically sold into bondage to satisfy her mother. Cal looks pretty good early on but as the story progresses this handsome, rich, and powerful gentleman slowly turns into a shouting, dish-smashing, homicidal maniac. Jack, who in a different generation might have been seen as a shifty ner' do well, is seducing Rose by offering her all the liberation her heart desires. Why, he even encourages her to "spit like a man." Meanwhile Cal is abusing his power to get himself (and Rose) a seat in the life boat ahead of even the children. He's taken care of his rival by chaining him up to drown on a sinking ship. When Rose makes a break to save Jack, Cal starts shooting -- I'll see you dead before I'll see you happy (and drown) with someone else. So here it's the gentle, sweet, and understanding Jack that in the end sacrifices his life for our difficult, promiscuous female.
Of course there is much more to consider but I'm just saying things have changed. Nowadays we can see either gender being made a victim of abuse. Nowadays what makes a man weak or strong isn't so easily scripted. But the themes remain the same when it comes to a obsession, jealousy, and love triangles. What it really boils down to is who has the power in the relationship, how do they get it, and what are they doing with it.
Something to think about in a little more modern setting.
opcorn: This was DD's favorite attraction at WDW when we went almost annually during her childhood.
