vanlifelady
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Sep 16, 2021
- Messages
- 82
- Reaction score
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I want to write a breakdown of her behavior because there seems to be a whole lot of confusion about how she could be the abused one when he has marks on him, but I don’t have time right now.
I’ll just say this- within seconds of that video, I (a prior victim and trained 911 dispatcher) knew that she was the victim. She takes responsibility for the entire argument, protects him, seems extremely overwhelmed, talks about him holding her face (a hold can be much more violent than a slap), has a story that is inconsistent with his in minor but key ways that would indicate the abuse is towards her- locking her out of the vehicle, for example, vs his insistence they were both going to take a walk.
He immediately turns off any sign of being upset and becomes very charming and jokes around with the officers in a situation that is EXTREMELY stressful and should be extremely stressful.
Victims of gaslighting and emotional abuse will seem extremely upset, overwhelmed, take responsibility for things they have no control over, while their abusers make comments about how “it’s not my fault because I can’t control x situation” (“I have dirty feet ).
I AM looking at this through the biased lens of a victim, but I gave Brian the benefit of the doubt until I saw that video. If you read between the lines and evaluate everything that was said by either person and the manner in which it was said, IMHO it becomes very clear that she, not Brian, is the victim.
I’ll just say this- within seconds of that video, I (a prior victim and trained 911 dispatcher) knew that she was the victim. She takes responsibility for the entire argument, protects him, seems extremely overwhelmed, talks about him holding her face (a hold can be much more violent than a slap), has a story that is inconsistent with his in minor but key ways that would indicate the abuse is towards her- locking her out of the vehicle, for example, vs his insistence they were both going to take a walk.
He immediately turns off any sign of being upset and becomes very charming and jokes around with the officers in a situation that is EXTREMELY stressful and should be extremely stressful.
Victims of gaslighting and emotional abuse will seem extremely upset, overwhelmed, take responsibility for things they have no control over, while their abusers make comments about how “it’s not my fault because I can’t control x situation” (“I have dirty feet ).
I AM looking at this through the biased lens of a victim, but I gave Brian the benefit of the doubt until I saw that video. If you read between the lines and evaluate everything that was said by either person and the manner in which it was said, IMHO it becomes very clear that she, not Brian, is the victim.