CA CA - Ember Graham, 7 mos, Happy Valley, 2 Jul 2015 - #3

[GigTu]

Every time he talked to his mom on Facebook he said " I love you mamma". Sigh. I so wanted to hate MG. But I just can't. I think he effed up bad while watching her, or maybe she had a bad seizure and died. Then he panicked. I think he loved her so much. On facebook he gave daily updates on Embers procedures and hospital stay. Posted pix of her, explaining everything. Now I'm sad for Ember AND for him. Heartbreaking.

Totally all this. Thank you for saying this. It's very sad no matter which way you view it. I am especially devastated for all the "mamma's". So many mistakes. So much loss.

 

[GigTu]

He had familiarity with the homeless encampments and Cypress Bridge . He was assigned that area while on work release. He found human remains that had been there for years according to his SM post. So maybe that came to mind as someplace that most folks don't go (homeless area). He himself ended up near such an encampment but I have no idea if it's the one he had to pickup trash in.

I hope LE is really trying to get to the bottom of the missing 1 hour, the possible sighting at 3am on the clear creek bridge, the neighbor seeing Ember before dark, and any reports of him coming/going any time in between all of those possibles as well as any time throughout the night.

If the missing 1 hour is the timeline he placed Ember, he could not have gone too too far AND he came from the west of he Happy Stop Mart. We might not ever hear any more about this case, so won't know who he last called/texted that day/night, or when and where he was when those contacts took place. I don't see how WS members will be able to help unless LE provides new information. That means your research and analysis is a huge asset. Thank you.

A baby is still missing. Regardless of her capacity, we need to find her. She deserves that.

 

[kimi_SFC]

Is this (bolded info) the hospital location ?

"An officer-safety bulletin says Matthew Graham, after learning new information in the case of his missing baby, Ember, stole a .40-caliber semiautomatic firearm and cash at 1:15 p.m. today from Court and Tehama streets in Redding and fled on foot."

http://www.redding.com/news/local-n...ng-baby-case-take-authorities-to-ono_80945585

This intersection appears to be near the Amtrak station and the Courthouse

Court St & Tehama St, Redding, CA 96001
http://goo.gl/maps/M6Ell

ETA: I plotted MH into google maps and two routes came up. I wasn't able to link them, but it's a mile or so away

HTH...

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[Mrs.g]

I thought all that took place later, after she was taken to the hospital?


It goes back to my question, I wish we know if/when/where this all took place.

I remember it being said the MG was never at the hospital.

 

[SCHMAE]

I remember it being said the MG was never at the hospital.

Yes, pretty sure a reporter tweeted he was not there.

 

[menmo]

BBM

Hmm, he doesn't work/ can't keep a job so whose paying for pampers and formula? It doesn't seem like he cares that much about her. He wasn't supporting her or her mama.

State aide most likely.

I'm going to suggest anyone here who has an ounce of sympathy for MG attend an open AA or NA meeting. MG is a liar who had one focus and once focus only and that was his addiction.

He didn't care about his kids. He didn't care about his wife. Heck, he didn't even care about his parents or other family members.

If he had given a chit about any of it he would have sought help for himself YEARS ago when he first became a parent.

Instead he took the easy way out and continued down his reckless path. Recovery takes WORK and it is clear MG was not interested in putting forth ANY effort to help himself. He was of no help to anyone in his condition and it cost not only himself, but his daughter and the rest of his family.

A horrible lesson but addiction is dangerous. Enabling is dangerous. Denial is dangerous.

Praying he was too stoned to hide her well and she is found soon. I think the best we can hope for is to continue to ask local hikers and other outdoor enthusiasts to keep their eyes out for anything suspicious.

ETA: The reason MG was able to get away with what he has the last several years is by preying on peoples pity and manipulating them into enabling him. Please don't continue to let him do that from the grave.

The above post is excellent so I reposted the whole thing and bolded the part that is so significant to me.
Addiction is a horrible thing to watch and be a part of.

Through my eyes:
They start out so little, cute and sweet and you love them with all of your heart and soul. Then they try the drugs or alcohol and it takes over their lives. It changes how they treat people, how they treat themselves, and their whole being.
For those of us not addicted we see it grab hold of those we love and squeeze every bit of happiness and life out of them, and a lot out of ourselves. The whole family life changes for everyone because of one persons choice. We're held hostages for awhile before we can pull ourselves away from enabling and believing every thing they say. Sometimes that helps jerk a knot in their tail, sometimes not. I haven't seen my son for a few years after he wanted me to lie in court for him. Of course I said no. It was such a roller coaster ride and if I were reading his FB I'm sure it would be somewhat like MG's. It's finally a peaceful feeling for me, and I feel some guilt for that.

JMO

 

[Jamielin]

I have been following Ember's case from the first thread and want to share my thoughts with you all.

I hope beyond all hope that Ember is found but fear that hope greatly diminished with the death of MG. My feeling is that Ember died whilst in his care through his negligence. Maybe after he had made the stop at the gas station,he went to do a drug deal and left a sleeping Ember in the car. At those temperatures,I'm not sure how long a tiny baby would take to succumb to the heat but I don't imagine it would be long. Couple that with the fact that Ember has health problems and he may have skipped feeding her due to being too stoned to have an awareness of the time,her odds of survival would be diminished further. Obviously this hinges on the witness account of his cousins girlfriend and if Ember was alive when she claims to have seen them.

Now for my personal experience with addicts. As a young woman not much older than Ember's mum,I was in a relationship with a man who turned out to be a heroin addict. He was a functioning addict who disguised it well (at that time,he was smoking and not injecting). I know it can boggle peoples minds how I didn't know but look at people like the actor,Cory Monteith,he just didnt look like the stereotype of a junkie. I was head over heels in love when a family member of his told me he had a problem. I thought naively that I could fix him.

My parents didn't like him as he was only able to hold down jobs sporadically whilst I had been through college and was working in my chosen field of early childhood education. It was only when I got pregnant and moved in with him( to a house much lesser than I had came from) I realised the true extent of his addiction,the lows he would stoop to like selling our TV to buy drugs and the degenerates he associated with. At 5 months pregnant,I moved back with my mum and dad. They were so happy,they worried about my future and that he would drag my down with him.

I had a son and he very much wanted to be part of his life. This was trying,I never stopped it but safe guarded my baby by ensuring he was supervised by his own mum. We went through the court system but as he had never harmed my son,his drug problem was never a reason to cease contact. I have no doubt that he loved my son and my son loved his daddy but over the years there were issues from time to time,thankfully nothing major and my son was none the wiser,his daddy was his hero.

In 2005,he hit rock bottom,was injecting, ended up homeless and his family were no longer supporting him. He ended up in a unit for homeless people,I let him come to my house to see my son as this was safest all round. It was a wake up call and he got clean. By his 30th birthday in 2008,his mum felt she had her son back,he was doing great. In December of that year,he met a new girlfriend. I was so happy for him until I found out she was a recovering addict too.

6 months later he was dead from a heroin overdose. My son was with him that day,he was late dropping him off from his Saturday visit. His auntie (dads sister) collected him for me and said my son was never to go back to his house with him again but was too upset to talk further and said we could talk later in the week. My little boy who was 7 told me daddy had went to the bathroom and fell asleep and made a big bang then his girlfriend was slapping his face and dragged him to bed. An hour later,I had a knock at my door to tell me he was dead. When his sister collected my son,his dad was in bed unconscious,his girlfriend refused to tell her what he was on but said he always goes like that. His sister is a nurse and checked his pulse,grabbed my son and left. I am so thankful to her that she got my son out of there before he was witness to what followed,an ambulance,police and his daddy lying dead.

This testifys to the selfishness of an addict. His other sister had visited at around 5 briefly and him and my son were playing. He couldn't wait till my son went home at 6 to go into the bathroom and shoot up.

Sorry for a long winded post but guess what I wanted to say is as much as any addict loves their kid,they love their drugs more. They will put their need for drugs above the needs of their own kid. Their selfishness is astounding to any normal parent. I think this is what happened with MG and he freaked and ran when he realised he was close to being found out.

eta By 2009,my ex had been clean for a few years and while the situation was monitored by family,he had my son unsupervised for the most part. Also,when my sons aunt collected him and felt his dads pulse,he was still alive. A heroin overdose isn't always instaneous,it depresses the respiratory system and can be gradual as was the case here.

 

[kimi_SFC]

This @LATimes article was linked within another Record Searchlight article, so I'm bringing it to the thread. Apologies if it has already been posted.

Hope dwindles after father of missing California baby is killed in shootout - LA Times
“He was the only person who last saw baby Graham and we believe knew the whereabouts of baby Graham,” Shasta County Sheriff Tom Bosenko said Monday. "Unless this investigation finds a note or some documentation that he left behind…we may not be able to ever find her.”

[...]

Ember’s parents were estranged, and her mother had dropped the baby off with Matthew Graham the day before the baby went missing, Bosenko said.

Garbage and old cars make up the landscaping, and Ember’s crib was inside a separate room that didn’t have a working door.

[...]

Investigators said last week they found a pacifier in the area that resembled one Ember was known to use, but it would take weeks before DNA tests could confirm if it was hers.

More@Link

http://www.latimes.com/local/lanow/la-me-ln-missing-baby-father-killed-20150714-story.html

My heart remains broken for Ember Skye! Where are you, BabyGirl?

:tears:
:candle:


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[kimi_SFC]

I have been following Ember's case from the first thread and want to share my thoughts with you all.

I hope beyond all hope that Ember is found but fear that hope greatly diminished with the death of MG. My feeling is that Ember died whilst in his care through his negligence. Maybe after he had made the stop at the gas station,he went to do a drug deal and left a sleeping Ember in the car. At those temperatures,I'm not sure how long a tiny baby would take to succumb to the heat but I don't imagine it would be long. Couple that with the fact that Ember has health problems and he may have skipped feeding her due to being too stoned to have an awareness of the time,her odds of survival would be diminished further. Obviously this hinges on the witness account of his cousins girlfriend and if Ember was alive when she claims to have seen them.

Now for my personal experience with addicts. As a young woman not much older than Ember's mum,I was in a relationship with a man who turned out to be a heroin addict. He was a functioning addict who disguised it well (at that time,he was smoking and not injecting). I know it can boggle peoples minds how I didn't know but look at people like the actor,Cory Monteith,he just didnt look like the stereotype of a junkie. I was head over heels in love when a family member of his told me he had a problem. I thought naively that I could fix him.

My parents didn't like him as he was only able to hold down jobs sporadically whilst I had been through college and was working in my chosen field of early childhood education. It was only when I got pregnant and moved in with him( to a house much lesser than I had came from) I realised the true extent of his addiction,the lows he would stoop to like selling our TV to buy drugs and the degenerates he associated with. At 5 months pregnant,I moved back with my mum and dad. They were so happy,they worried about my future and that he would drag my down with him.

I had a son and he very much wanted to be part of his life. This was trying,I never stopped it but safe guarded my baby by ensuring he was supervised by his own mum. We went through the court system but as he had never harmed my son,his drug problem was never a reason to cease contact. I have no doubt that he loved my son and my son loved his daddy but over the years there were issues from time to time,thankfully nothing major and my son was none the wiser,his daddy was his hero.

In 2005,he hit rock bottom,was injecting, ended up homeless and his family were no longer supporting him. He ended up in a unit for homeless people,I let him come to my house to see my son as this was safest all round. It was a wake up call and he got clean. By his 30th birthday in 2008,his mum felt she had her son back,he was doing great. In December of that year,he met a new girlfriend. I was so happy for him until I found out she was a recovering addict too.

6 months later he was dead from a heroin overdose. My son was with him that day,he was late dropping him off from his Saturday visit. His auntie (dads sister) collected him for me and said my son was never to go back to his house with him again but was too upset to talk further and said we could talk later in the week. My little boy who was 7 told me daddy had went to the bathroom and fell asleep and made a big bang then his girlfriend was slapping his face and dragged him to bed. An hour later,I had a knock at my door to tell me he was dead. When his sister collected my son,his dad was in bed unconscious,his girlfriend refused to tell her what he was on but said he always goes like that. His sister is a nurse and checked his pulse,grabbed my son and left. I am so thankful to her that she got my son out of there before he was witness to what followed,an ambulance,police and his daddy lying dead.

This testifys to the selfishness of an addict. His other sister had visited at around 5 briefly and him and my son were playing. He couldn't wait till my son went home at 6 to go into the bathroom and shoot up.

Sorry for a long winded post but guess what I wanted to say is as much as any addict loves their kid,they love their drugs more. They will put their need for drugs above the needs of their own kid. Their selfishness is astounding to any normal parent. I think this is what happened with MG and he freaked and ran when he realised he was close to being found out.

jamilelin, thank you for this heartfelt post :heartluv: :welcome4:

The stories painted by WSers like you and others, sharing their experiences with addiction, allow the reader a window into a painful world we may not be able to fathom otherwise. The thanks button is simply not enough, for your willingness to lend understanding to others. I'm certain this wasn't easy for you to write. :grouphug:

As we await word of some break in Baby Ember's case, and the reality of the profound loss sets in to those who knew mg, I can only hope that anyone who knew him well will consider this today and in the future. There's a lot of anger swirling about at the moment. It's a part of the grieving process. Whether or not they are justified in their mindset remains to be proven. What is immediate is the need to find Baby Ember! As long as there is a common focus, all sides should be able to come together for the good.

IMV, that's what raising a child and family is all about. Addiction can tear that apart easily, as we have seen and read here on Ember's threads. May everyone who loves her be able to join forces in Bringing Ember Home. lease:

This is my wish.

:twocents:


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[La Louve]

I have been following Ember's case from the first thread and want to share my thoughts with you all.

I hope beyond all hope that Ember is found but fear that hope greatly diminished with the death of MG. My feeling is that Ember died whilst in his care through his negligence. Maybe after he had made the stop at the gas station,he went to do a drug deal and left a sleeping Ember in the car. At those temperatures,I'm not sure how long a tiny baby would take to succumb to the heat but I don't imagine it would be long. Couple that with the fact that Ember has health problems and he may have skipped feeding her due to being too stoned to have an awareness of the time,her odds of survival would be diminished further. Obviously this hinges on the witness account of his cousins girlfriend and if Ember was alive when she claims to have seen them.

Now for my personal experience with addicts. As a young woman not much older than Ember's mum,I was in a relationship with a man who turned out to be a heroin addict. He was a functioning addict who disguised it well (at that time,he was smoking and not injecting). I know it can boggle peoples minds how I didn't know but look at people like the actor,Cory Monteith,he just didnt look like the stereotype of a junkie. I was head over heels in love when a family member of his told me he had a problem. I thought naively that I could fix him.

My parents didn't like him as he was only able to hold down jobs sporadically whilst I had been through college and was working in my chosen field of early childhood education. It was only when I got pregnant and moved in with him( to a house much lesser than I had came from) I realised the true extent of his addiction,the lows he would stoop to like selling our TV to buy drugs and the degenerates he associated with. At 5 months pregnant,I moved back with my mum and dad. They were so happy,they worried about my future and that he would drag my down with him.

I had a son and he very much wanted to be part of his life. This was trying,I never stopped it but safe guarded my baby by ensuring he was supervised by his own mum. We went through the court system but as he had never harmed my son,his drug problem was never a reason to cease contact. I have no doubt that he loved my son and my son loved his daddy but over the years there were issues from time to time,thankfully nothing major and my son was none the wiser,his daddy was his hero.

In 2005,he hit rock bottom,was injecting, ended up homeless and his family were no longer supporting him. He ended up in a unit for homeless people,I let him come to my house to see my son as this was safest all round. It was a wake up call and he got clean. By his 30th birthday in 2008,his mum felt she had her son back,he was doing great. In December of that year,he met a new girlfriend. I was so happy for him until I found out she was a recovering addict too.

6 months later he was dead from a heroin overdose. My son was with him that day,he was late dropping him off from his Saturday visit. His auntie (dads sister) collected him for me and said my son was never to go back to his house with him again but was too upset to talk further and said we could talk later in the week. My little boy who was 7 told me daddy had went to the bathroom and fell asleep and made a big bang then his girlfriend was slapping his face and dragged him to bed. An hour later,I had a knock at my door to tell me he was dead. When his sister collected my son,his dad was in bed unconscious,his girlfriend refused to tell her what he was on but said he always goes like that. His sister is a nurse and checked his pulse,grabbed my son and left. I am so thankful to her that she got my son out of there before he was witness to what followed,an ambulance,police and his daddy lying dead.

This testifys to the selfishness of an addict. His other sister had visited at around 5 briefly and him and my son were playing. He couldn't wait till my son went home at 6 to go into the bathroom and shoot up.

Sorry for a long winded post but guess what I wanted to say is as much as any addict loves their kid,they love their drugs more. They will put their need for drugs above the needs of their own kid. Their selfishness is astounding to any normal parent. I think this is what happened with MG and he freaked and ran when he realised he was close to being found out.

BBM this is what I think happened, too. Even with the truck windows open it would not take long for Ember to succumb to the heat. She may not have been dead when he left to return home, but I do think she was too far gone by that point.

I want to thank you for sharing your story Jamielin. I am so glad you were able to reclaim your life for you and your son. As your story illustrates, addiction affects so many people beyond the addict.

And welcome to Websleuths!

 

[MsMarple]

UPDATED: Matthew Graham's dad still stands behind son on baby Ember case

http://www.redding.com/news/local-n...stands-behind-son-on-baby-ember-case_70139852

Unfortunately the article is now behind a paywall for me. I must have used up my free browsing.

 

[Amster]

This @LATimes article was linked within another Record Searchlight article, so I'm bringing it to the thread. Apologies if it has already been posted.

Hope dwindles after father of missing California baby is killed in shootout - LA Times
“He was the only person who last saw baby Graham and we believe knew the whereabouts of baby Graham,” Shasta County Sheriff Tom Bosenko said Monday. "Unless this investigation finds a note or some documentation that he left behind…we may not be able to ever find her.”

[...]

Ember’s parents were estranged, and her mother had dropped the baby off with Matthew Graham the day before the baby went missing, Bosenko said.

Garbage and old cars make up the landscaping, and Ember’s crib was inside a separate room that didn’t have a working door.

[...]

Investigators said last week they found a pacifier in the area that resembled one Ember was known to use, but it would take weeks before DNA tests could confirm if it was hers.

More@Link

http://www.latimes.com/local/lanow/la-me-ln-missing-baby-father-killed-20150714-story.html

My heart remains broken for Ember Skye! Where are you, BabyGirl?

:tears:
:candle:


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

So......mom dropped off Ember with dad. At the trailer? If so, that is disgusting.

 

[MsMarple]

Jenny Espino ‏@jennyespino_RS 47m47 minutes ago
You know how #BabyEmber's grandfather talks abt hot tip in Oregon? It was never a lead: https://www.facebook.com/FindBabyEmber/posts/146371602360494 …
http://www.redding.com/news/local-n...stands-behind-son-on-baby-ember-case_70139852 …

https://twitter.com/jennyespino_RS/with_replies

 

[GigTu]

Through my eyes:
They start out so little, cute and sweet and you love them with all of your heart and soul. Then they try the drugs or alcohol and it takes over their lives. It changes how they treat people, how they treat themselves, and their whole being.
For those of us not addicted we see it grab hold of those we love and squeeze every bit of happiness and life out of them, and a lot out of ourselves. The whole family life changes for everyone because of one persons choice. We're held hostages for awhile before we can pull ourselves away from enabling and believing every thing they say. Sometimes that helps jerk a knot in their tail, sometimes not. I haven't seen my son for a few years after he wanted me to lie in court for him. Of course I said no. It was such a roller coaster ride and if I were reading his FB I'm sure it would be somewhat like MG's. It's finally a peaceful feeling for me, and I feel some guilt for that.

Now for my personal experience with addicts. As a young woman not much older than Ember's mum,I was in a relationship with a man who turned out to be a heroin addict. He was a functioning addict who disguised it well (at that time,he was smoking and not injecting). I know it can boggle peoples minds how I didn't know but look at people like the actor,Cory Monteith,he just didnt look like the stereotype of a junkie. I was head over heels in love when a family member of his told me he had a problem. I thought naively that I could fix him.

My parents didn't like him as he was only able to hold down jobs sporadically whilst I had been through college and was working in my chosen field of early childhood education. It was only when I got pregnant and moved in with him( to a house much lesser than I had came from) I realised the true extent of his addiction,the lows he would stoop to like selling our TV to buy drugs and the degenerates he associated with. At 5 months pregnant,I moved back with my mum and dad. They were so happy,they worried about my future and that he would drag my down with him.

I had a son and he very much wanted to be part of his life. This was trying,I never stopped it but safe guarded my baby by ensuring he was supervised by his own mum. We went through the court system but as he had never harmed my son,his drug problem was never a reason to cease contact. I have no doubt that he loved my son and my son loved his daddy but over the years there were issues from time to time,thankfully nothing major and my son was none the wiser,his daddy was his hero.

In 2005,he hit rock bottom,was injecting, ended up homeless and his family were no longer supporting him. He ended up in a unit for homeless people,I let him come to my house to see my son as this was safest all round. It was a wake up call and he got clean. By his 30th birthday in 2008,his mum felt she had her son back,he was doing great. In December of that year,he met a new girlfriend. I was so happy for him until I found out she was a recovering addict too.

6 months later he was dead from a heroin overdose. My son was with him that day,he was late dropping him off from his Saturday visit. His auntie (dads sister) collected him for me and said my son was never to go back to his house with him again but was too upset to talk further and said we could talk later in the week. My little boy who was 7 told me daddy had went to the bathroom and fell asleep and made a big bang then his girlfriend was slapping his face and dragged him to bed. An hour later,I had a knock at my door to tell me he was dead. When his sister collected my son,his dad was in bed unconscious,his girlfriend refused to tell her what he was on but said he always goes like that. His sister is a nurse and checked his pulse,grabbed my son and left. I am so thankful to her that she got my son out of there before he was witness to what followed,an ambulance,police and his daddy lying dead.

This testifys to the selfishness of an addict. His other sister had visited at around 5 briefly and him and my son were playing. He couldn't wait till my son went home at 6 to go into the bathroom and shoot up.

Menmo and Jamielin, I send my squeeziest hugs and warmest well wishes. Jamielin, I am so thankful your son is okay after all of that. Menmo, I hope some day soon your son will come to value himself enough that he finds the strength to break free of his addiction, cleans up, and come back to you before it's too late. I simply can not imagine having to watch one's own child deteriorate to the point of having to let them go. I'm sorry.

 

[PLT]

Thank you to those that shared their experiences with addiction. I respect your courage and strength with having to set boundaries with loved ones especially not allowing them into your life .

I am one of those who cannot fathom not putting a child's welfare first. It just boggles my mind so these stories and others I have heard offline really do paint the picture for me of MG that evening.

I think Ember may have been able to survive a missed feeding but I think it was the heat or a dropping that was fatal. I still wonder why he didn't continue to deny it as she had not been found. He was free and family was supporting his innocence so why run when the pacifier was found? it makes me think that something was on her or the pacifier that would totally point the finger at him and he thought they were close to finding it. It is sad to say but I think if she wasn't found he probably would have had a chance to fight/lessen the charges. I just hope the searches don't waiver because they don't need her for proof now. Thank you all again for sharing .

 

[LisaCougar]

BBM

State aide most likely.


The above post is excellent so I reposted the whole thing and bolded the part that is so significant to me.
Addiction is a horrible thing to watch and be a part of.

Through my eyes:
They start out so little, cute and sweet and you love them with all of your heart and soul. Then they try the drugs or alcohol and it takes over their lives. It changes how they treat people, how they treat themselves, and their whole being.
For those of us not addicted we see it grab hold of those we love and squeeze every bit of happiness and life out of them, and a lot out of ourselves. The whole family life changes for everyone because of one persons choice. We're held hostages for awhile before we can pull ourselves away from enabling and believing every thing they say. Sometimes that helps jerk a knot in their tail, sometimes not. I haven't seen my son for a few years after he wanted me to lie in court for him. Of course I said no. It was such a roller coaster ride and if I were reading his FB I'm sure it would be somewhat like MG's. It's finally a peaceful feeling for me, and I feel some guilt for that.

JMO

I wanted to thank both Cubby and menmo for their excellent posts. I had to move away to a different state from my oldest son just so I could have some sanity. I love him with all my heart but I couldn't take the roller coaster ride any longer. He just turned 36 and I am amazed (and extremely thankful) he has made it this long. I too feel guilt at times but I do have my sanity back.

 

[GigTu]

Question.... if baby Ember died accidentally, would MG die over that? Was his mind that far gone? If it was able to be proven that it was negligence, he'd still be in trouble, but by long and far it would be of a lesser charge, right? However, if he did something like "shut her up", maybe this would explain why he was willing to die over her disappearance.

I'm just having trouble believing he didn't do something purposeful to cause her death, versus a 'stupid mistake', that led to his final standoff and death.

 

[Pansen]

Most people seem to want to believe that MG was this poor addict and the child 'accidentally' died while in his care. They don't want to believe something perhaps more insidious.

I go back to the seizures. I wonder if that poor baby had an undiagnosed (unproven) case of Shaken Baby Syndrome. I wonder if he couldn't handle her crying and his lack of sleep. I think it's possible he abused this poor baby. He was left alone with her, and I think he couldn't handle it and did something out of frustrated anger. I also think they would be able to tell this if, and hopefully when, they find her. I think MG knew this and would rather die than to live being thought of as a baby killer.

http://kidshealth.org/parent/medical/brain/shaken.html#

 

[MsMarple]

Question.... if baby Ember died accidentally, would MG die over that? Was his mind that far gone? If it was able to be proven that it was negligence, he'd still be in trouble, but by long and far it would be of a lesser charge, right? However, if he did something like "shut her up", maybe this would explain why he was willing to die over her disappearance.

I'm just having trouble believing he didn't do something purposeful to cause her death, versus a 'stupid mistake', that led to his final standoff and death.

I think most of us here have seen enough cases that we've learned that it's often impossible to understand what goes through a parent's mind when a child is harmed. Some call 911 or take their baby to a hospital and try and claim an accident happened then doctors find multiple broken bones or ruptured organs that clearly point to abuse. Yet the parent is willing to roll the dice and hope they'll get away with it.

In other cases the child goes “missing.” From the ones I've followed I've never seen any of those cases turn out to be a natural or even truly accidental death. If the child's body is recovered the evidence points to murder and in some cases where the body is not found LE finds blood or other evidence pointing to a violent incident.

So where does MG fit in? I have no idea. Here's what I know – it's improbable that Ember was abducted. MG ran when a pacifier only similar to Ember's was found in an area that LE was led to through their investigation. When cornered he shot at LE. So IMO no, MG wasn't willing to die over an accident. I believe he purposely killed her, either due to a moment of frustrated rage or because he simply didn't want her.

MG had the full support of his wife and family. When the pacifier was found he had an opportunity to go to them and confess. He could have told them she succumbed to heat exhaustion, or slipped out of his arms – any story that would make her death an accident. And I'm willing to bet that his family had at least one conversation with him about that possibility.

MOO is that Ember was murdered and her father tried to cover it up and he was willing to die because he thought Ember was going to be found and he didn't want to spend the rest of his life in prison.

I just hope that LE doesn't put this case too far on the back burner now.

 

[osu]

Thank you to those that shared their experiences with addiction. I respect your courage and strength with having to set boundaries with loved ones especially not allowing them into your life .

I am one of those who cannot fathom not putting a child's welfare first. It just boggles my mind so these stories and others I have heard offline really do paint the picture for me of MG that evening.

I think Ember may have been able to survive a missed feeding but I think it was the heat or a dropping that was fatal. I still wonder why he didn't continue to deny it as she had not been found. He was free and family was supporting his innocence so why run when the pacifier was found? it makes me think that something was on her or the pacifier that would totally point the finger at him and he thought they were close to finding it. It is sad to say but I think if she wasn't found he probably would have had a chance to fight/lessen the charges. I just hope the searches don't waiver because they don't need her for proof now. Thank you all again for sharing .

I'm wondering if he was putting MG honey oil on her pacifier as a treatment for her seizures or to make her sleep?