Found Deceased CO - David Puckett, 6, Aurora, 31 Dec 2016

  • #641
Momma2cam and I were not necessarily speaking about what happened on Saturday.


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Oh - no, no, no.. I wasn't accusing anybody here of shaming! I was just sharing.
 
  • #642
Oh - no, no, no.. I wasn't accusing anybody here of shaming! I was just sharing.

Sorry, I'm having a bad day so apparently read too much into your post.


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  • #643
Sorry, I'm having a bad day so apparently read too much into your post.


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No apology necessary. I really should have made myself more clear in the first place. My apologies.
 
  • #644
Took this photo a few minutes ago at the memorial site.

I believe there might be off-duty police or possibly friends or family that are keeping watch over the site because as my husband and I looked at all the tokens that had been left, an SUV pulled up next to us and another parked out on the street until we left. No one got out of either vehicle but stayed until we were done paying respects.

We had a difficult time trying to decide what to leave at the site because there is still snow everywhere. My husband decided we should leave a Lego racecar he built when he was young because he figured a child would appreciate it.

Anyway, the site is beautiful. Lots of stuffed animals, several candles and a lighter perched in the snow so as to not get wet, cards made out to the family, poems, balloons, pictures made by children, several beautiful wreaths, and a few bouquets of flowers.

It is very peaceful there now. The crime scene tape is gone and the pond is once again frozen over and covered in snow. If you didn't know about the past week, you wouldn't be able to tell anything had changed.

It's beautiful. It's tragic. The ice and snow seem appropriate somehow. It's bitterly cold out there tonight. Once the makeshift memorial is gone it will seem like it never happened.

I hope we can get a bench or fence put out there for an official memorial. David's death can't be in vain. I think I'll start looking into how to get that done. At the very least, maybe a plaque.

It feels really real right now. Even though I was a part of it this last week, I don't know that I truly felt or understood how much was lost. That precious child died alone and wet and cold and scared. It's heartbreaking.

But I know that tomorrow will come and I will go about my life. I will probably occasionally remember David and the week that changed my life. I will wonder about his family, his mother. I will send up a prayer when I think of her. I hope she will one day forgive herself. I hope she feels happiness again some day.

b9bb071215ce716dc57d123cfd569ab7.jpg



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  • #645
Another young beautiful baby...Gone. RIP
 
  • #646
I don't think I've seen any parent shaming on here. .

I'm not a parent so maybe I see it differently, but I have seen a fair bit of what I would call "parent-shaming" on here. It's usually disguised as "making myself feel better", though - "I'd never let my kid do that", "I'd never do that with my kids".

Whatever was happening prior to David's death is to be determined, but even if charges are made, comments like that add nothing to "sleuthing", and serve only to make people feel better/safer about themselves.
 
  • #647
I'm not a parent so maybe I see it differently, but I have seen a fair bit of what I would call "parent-shaming" on here. It's usually disguised as "making myself feel better", though - "I'd never let my kid do that", "I'd never do that with my kids".

Whatever was happening prior to David's death is to be determined, but even if charges are made, comments like that add nothing to "sleuthing", and serve only to make people feel better/safer about themselves.
I usually step back and recognize that all parents do the best they can with what they know and the vast majority have the best intentions. That is no different here. This poor boy lost his life and his family is grieving. Despite what may have happened in the past, they lost a child. Guilt will likely be felt for a long time and as others have said, I sincerely hope she can forgive herself one day and remember all the positive memories of his little life.

That said, if there is a history, the reason investigating is important is to further protect other children in the home. I'm an advocate of teaching, not punishing, for many cases of unintentional or non-violent abuse/neglect. I'm not saying that is even true in this case but IF an investigation finds that, I'm hopeful services can be implemented that will reduce likelihood of any further abuse or neglect. Again, I am not investigating this case and speculation/rumors are just that- rumors and speculation- until an investigation is complete.

PP, thanks for sharing your experience at the memorial site. It is nice to see how much the community is coming together to support this little boy and his family. Yet, heartbreaking at the same time.

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  • #648
I find this place is pretty good about parent shaming compared to other places. Most comments I've seen are very tame and non toxic compared to the parent shaming with regards to say, Lane Graves' parents. (But that was on FB) Someone made a comment about how today parent shaming is more common than years ago. (Did people criticize Baby Jessica's parents when she fell down a well?)

Parents are constantly shamed for their choices. From how we feed children to how we educate them, everyone has an opinion on how to raise kids. The result? Moms and dads feel endlessly judged for the choices they make. When it comes to a death of a child however, I think it's just a natural reaction to wonder how and why it happened and what was the situation that led up to it?
 
  • #649
I'm not a parent so maybe I see it differently, but I have seen a fair bit of what I would call "parent-shaming" on here. It's usually disguised as "making myself feel better", though - "I'd never let my kid do that", "I'd never do that with my kids".

Whatever was happening prior to David's death is to be determined, but even if charges are made, comments like that add nothing to "sleuthing", and serve only to make people feel better/safer about themselves.

I agree. I may not have notice any of it, but that doesn't mean it wasn't there. I will say that when a case, any case, hits close to home for me, I try to find ways to make it a little less close to home. Following all these cases can make you realize what a scary world this is & it's somewhat natural to get defensive & figure out reasons why it could never happen to you. I hope when I do that myself, I never shame another person. We all make mistakes in life. Parenting & otherwise.


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  • #650
I take that to mean, they had no indication that he had fallen through the ice. So they had no reason to search the pond. I find it to be completely believable, that there was no evidence that he fell into the pond.

More than likely he fell through the ice hole by the fountain. I don't know what the weather conditions were like at the time, but snow and wind could have covered up his tracks, in a short time.

To clarify I meant the way the tweet was worded, during an active investigation it seemed a little unprofessional. MOO
 
  • #651
I was a helicopter parent when my now 21 and 16 year olds were tots. My husband was alot more relaxed. I was a "don't do this or that could happen" and my husband was a "stop, I got this, relax" type. EVEN SO I was born a human before I added propellers, and I had a time (OK maybe 2, sigh 3) where I may or may not have made a mistake that could have caused my child harm. This is normal. Social Media is awful. Sometimes people are bad parents, but more often they are good parents having a bad day (or ten seconds). Hiding behind a screen name and condemning these poor people is trolling.

Now, when a parent is criminally negligent....Whole nother ball of wax. Then I come around and have my say. This is why I love WS. I leave the nastiness to FB.

Just wanted to add my unasked for view here. It's snowing. I'm stuck here for the day. My thoughts are heavy for this poor child's death and I'm thinking of his family. The memorial almost made me cry. I vote for a fence. Nothing works 100 ℅ but that might have helped.
Peace.

I don't think anyone here judges or parent shames.

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  • #652
That picture of the memorial is so somber to me this morning. So sad. Thank you for paying your respects serenitysprings xo


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  • #653
Took this photo a few minutes ago at the memorial site.

I believe there might be off-duty police or possibly friends or family that are keeping watch over the site because as my husband and I looked at all the tokens that had been left, an SUV pulled up next to us and another parked out on the street until we left. No one got out of either vehicle but stayed until we were done paying respects.

We had a difficult time trying to decide what to leave at the site because there is still snow everywhere. My husband decided we should leave a Lego racecar he built when he was young because he figured a child would appreciate it.

Anyway, the site is beautiful. Lots of stuffed animals, several candles and a lighter perched in the snow so as to not get wet, cards made out to the family, poems, balloons, pictures made by children, several beautiful wreaths, and a few bouquets of flowers.

It is very peaceful there now. The crime scene tape is gone and the pond is once again frozen over and covered in snow. If you didn't know about the past week, you wouldn't be able to tell anything had changed.

It's beautiful. It's tragic. The ice and snow seem appropriate somehow. It's bitterly cold out there tonight. Once the makeshift memorial is gone it will seem like it never happened.

I hope we can get a bench or fence put out there for an official memorial. David's death can't be in vain. I think I'll start looking into how to get that done. At the very least, maybe a plaque.

It feels really real right now. Even though I was a part of it this last week, I don't know that I truly felt or understood how much was lost. That precious child died alone and wet and cold and scared. It's heartbreaking.

But I know that tomorrow will come and I will go about my life. I will probably occasionally remember David and the week that changed my life. I will wonder about his family, his mother. I will send up a prayer when I think of her. I hope she will one day forgive herself. I hope she feels happiness again some day.

b9bb071215ce716dc57d123cfd569ab7.jpg



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Blessings, SerenitySprings; and to Mr. SerenitySprings, too - for all you have done for little David.
 
  • #654
Just wanted to add my unasked for view here. It's snowing. I'm stuck here for the day. My thoughts are heavy for this poor child's death and I'm thinking of his family. The memorial almost made me cry. I vote for a fence. Nothing works 100 ℅ but that might have helped.
Peace.

We were predicted to get 5-8 inches of snow but instead got maybe one inch. :cry:

I agree with the fence idea. It might prevent this from happening again.
 
  • #655
I am going to contact the city to see what we need to do to get a fence built. There was one sign advising to keep off the ice but it was tiny and maybe 6 feet in the air. It wasn't lit up or anything. A kid wouldn't see that. Hell, I almost didn't see it. Even just a small fence, like a picket fence maybe. It doesn't have to ruin the ambience but kids would run into it or be warned by their parents not to go on the other side of it. I feel like something should be done in remembrance but also to further ensure safety.

I'll post updates here, unless this is an inappropriate place for that. That way if we need signatures or whatever we can all have a part in it. I'm sure there are tons of other Coloradans who would love to contribute.

As important as it is to sleuth, it's just as important to build community and forge relationships that help us all get through these tragic situations. And, I believe, it's just as important for us to advocate for those that can't.

I'm sure we all know people that can't fathom digging into these cases because of how it can change you. This is a choice we make. For some reason we are a little bit immune to the horror, for whatever reason. Because of that we must be a voice for those that can't or won't have one.

Coming here has brought me tremendous comfort this week. Thank you for that.

In an hour and a half it will be 2pm, exactly one week after the time when the last person not in the family saw little David alive.

It will be 2 1/2 hours after that when the family reportedly realized he was missing.

And hour and 15 minutes after that the police were called.

Within an hour after that, dogs were brought in.

18 hours or so after that a broken mother spoke during a presser, pleading for assistance with bringing home her baby.

It would be just about 36 after then that the police advised all volunteer searchers to go home so the dogs could more easily do their job.

Several hours after that, they pretty much knew what had happened and the family was informed.

It wouldn't be until the next day that police made the announcement and a day after that, the remains were positively identified.

I hope that timeline doesn't get lost in my memory as I age and move on to different stories. It only takes a moment for a mother to lose a child. It took days to know for sure what we all pretty much expected.

I don't want to forget because it is a constant reminder of how quickly our lives can change.




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  • #656
Took this photo a few minutes ago at the memorial site.

I believe there might be off-duty police or possibly friends or family that are keeping watch over the site because as my husband and I looked at all the tokens that had been left, an SUV pulled up next to us and another parked out on the street until we left. No one got out of either vehicle but stayed until we were done paying respects.

We had a difficult time trying to decide what to leave at the site because there is still snow everywhere. My husband decided we should leave a Lego racecar he built when he was young because he figured a child would appreciate it.

Anyway, the site is beautiful. Lots of stuffed animals, several candles and a lighter perched in the snow so as to not get wet, cards made out to the family, poems, balloons, pictures made by children, several beautiful wreaths, and a few bouquets of flowers.

It is very peaceful there now. The crime scene tape is gone and the pond is once again frozen over and covered in snow. If you didn't know about the past week, you wouldn't be able to tell anything had changed.

It's beautiful. It's tragic. The ice and snow seem appropriate somehow. It's bitterly cold out there tonight. Once the makeshift memorial is gone it will seem like it never happened.

I hope we can get a bench or fence put out there for an official memorial. David's death can't be in vain. I think I'll start looking into how to get that done. At the very least, maybe a plaque.

It feels really real right now. Even though I was a part of it this last week, I don't know that I truly felt or understood how much was lost. That precious child died alone and wet and cold and scared. It's heartbreaking.

But I know that tomorrow will come and I will go about my life. I will probably occasionally remember David and the week that changed my life. I will wonder about his family, his mother. I will send up a prayer when I think of her. I hope she will one day forgive herself. I hope she feels happiness again some day.

b9bb071215ce716dc57d123cfd569ab7.jpg



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That is beautiful! Your hub and must be a wonderful man. This brought tears to my eyes!

Seriously, I believe if there were fewer electronic devices and more legos, lincoln logs, and erector sets, kids would be better off!
RIP little David. 🚀
 
  • #657
We were predicted to get 5-8 inches of snow but instead got maybe one inch. :cry:

I agree with the fence idea. It might prevent this from happening again.
I can't believe it didn't have a fence. It's a Georgia law that there must be a 5ft fence around pools.
What child can't climb one though, if they want in one bad enough.
Damned if you do, damned if you don't.
Moo
 
  • #658
I can't believe it didn't have a fence. It's a Georgia law that there must be a 5ft fence around pools.
What child can't climb one though, if they want in one bad enough.
Damned if you do, damned if you don't.
Moo

A pool is much different than a pond or whatever so even if there are laws like that in this area, it wouldn't apply in this case.
 
  • #659
It either needs to be working in the winter so it can't freeze over, or a little temporary fence put up - that is what they use where I live (the mesh garden border fencing with little orange ties). Looking at that photo above, it would be more than easy to walk over that thinking it is a flat snow-covered plaza or play area if you didn't know the layout of the park. I don't see how he could have drowned if there was no ice - it is shallow and small - even after the shock of hitting cold water, he still could have doggy paddled out of it in time. Hypothermia would have killed him somewhere after that, and only if he wandered around awhile instead of going straight home. I also don't think the pump is strong enough to pull a 6 year old under - they aren't on in the photo - is there confirmation they were even on when this happened?
 
  • #660
It either needs to be working in the winter so it can't freeze over, or a little temporary fence put up - that is what they use where I live (the mesh garden border fencing with little orange ties). Looking at that photo above, it would be more than easy to walk over that thinking it is a flat snow-covered plaza or play area if you didn't know the layout of the park. I don't see how he could have drowned if there was no ice - it is shallow and small - even after the shock of hitting cold water, he still could have doggy paddled out of it in time. Hypothermia would have killed him somewhere after that, and only if he wandered around awhile instead of going straight home. I also don't think the pump is strong enough to pull a 6 year old under - they aren't on in the photo - is there confirmation they were even on when this happened?

The fountains were on when he entered the pond. His body was partially pulled into one of the pumps. They turned the fountains off at some point but I'm not exactly sure when but last Saturday they were on.


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