CO- Dylan Redwine, 13, Vallecito, 19 November 2012 - #20

[cluciano63]

Even Kaine and Desiree presented a united front for a long time, before Desiree finally cracked. These two cant seem to come together for even an instant on Dylan's behalf.

 

[asyousay]

My theory about MR not wanting to do any interviews is because there will be a ton of pressure and he may well slip up and make a mistake (IMO) .

Elaine is willing to do small news segments so why not MR , Is the goal not the same here " bringing Dylan home" ?

MOO.

 

[DylansMom34]

I really think if there had been any kind of uniform front with the parents appearing together IMMEDIATELY after Dylan was missing, interviewing together, pleading for the safe return of their son. But, unfortunately, only one parent did these things. Those first several days when MR was invisible. As a matter of fact, I can't remember him pleading for Dylan's return or really even looking very upset at all the few times he has been interviewed. IMO MR seems more concerned about MR. Again JMO!!

 

[SarahKat]

The hitching a lift home in the snow was just one anecdote from his friends that was included in that article "A Boy's Life" -


http://http://www.durangoherald.com/article/20121215/NEWS01/121219687/A-boy’s-life--

Nobody went on to point out that this was a one time event. On the contrary, the same friend told another reporter that Dylan wasn't shy about hitching rides. I think the friends who spent those long days having fun together for weeks on end would have a pretty good idea of how Dylan might behave when not necessarily under the watchful eyes of parents.

The video clip of Dylan's friends at the top of the Boys Life article linked above also includes his friends saying

This has been another thing some have disputed IIRC.

I totally agree! One says he loves outdoors, the video his friend made proves it to me. The other parent said way different at the initial interview....that always seemed strange to me. :twocents:

 

[cattlekate]

those texts could be quite telling

IMO that reminds me of Gerard Baden Clay sending texts to his wife.

And Travis Forbes' texts to Kenia Monge's phone.

 

[vasportsmom]

Even Kaine and Desiree presented a united front for a long time, before Desiree finally cracked. These two cant seem to come together for even an instant on Dylan's behalf.

And we saw a united front from Jessica Ridgeway's parents too. I've said from the beginning that it is hard not to judge both parents for their inability to put aside their personal differences and come together for the sake of their son.

 

[Seajay]

imo Dylan would have been very unlikely to have hitch hiked in his mother's presence, or have necessarily told her all about it when he had. He had lots of freedom by all accounts, which I think is important for boys who love to ride around or head off on adventures at the river. He sounds like a great kid, but mum mightn't necessarily know about every aspect of his days out with friends. In my experience with many boys, they do tend to keep the things that they know will freak out mum to themselves.
I'm still going with his friend's opinions on this score
:moo:

Truer words have never been spoken. My son was here for Christmas and told me just last night when he use to go to one of his friend's houses, he would hop on a railroad car that was going slow and ride it down to his friends neighborhood and jump off. I was appalled. That was very dangerous and I would have never in a million years thought he would do that.

 

[cluciano63]

And we saw a united front from Jessica Ridgeway's parents too. I've said from the beginning that it is hard not to judge both parents for their inability to put aside their personal differences and come together for the sake of their son.

I think the fact that they have not has contributed to the notion that this could be a custodial thing, by some people, which is harmful to Dylan. People lose interest in custody or family issues very quickly, overall.

 

[Crosby87]

“Sixth Judicial District Judge David Dickinson issued a court order granting Mark Redwine, Dylan’s father, visitation rights during the Thanksgiving holiday”.

It sounds like this was the first and only visit Judge Dickinson granted Mark after Elaine received primary custody of Dylan so, if Mark wanted more visits with Dylan, did he have to go back to court to request them from the Judge?

Is it true that Mark contested ER’s request to move Dylan to CS?

Elaine Redwine told ABC News Radio she is afraid Mark Redwine had something to do with Dylan’s disappearance and her ex-husband was upset that she had received primary custody of the teenager.”

NG asked D Hess whether Mark & Elaine fought about Dylan, and she said, “Not tmk until Elaine was awarded custody of Dylan and then Mark went and asked for visitation rights. That`s the only thing I know of.”

http://www.durangoherald.com/articl...9528/Timeline-of-events-in-Dylan-Redwine-case

http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/1211/28/ng.01.html

 

[vasportsmom]

I think the fact that they have not has contributed to the notion that this could be a custodial thing, by some people, which is harmful to Dylan. People lose interest in custody or family issues very quickly, overall.

Exactly! I hate to say it but ER did the case no favors either by basically accusing MR. I understand why she did it and I may very well have been unable to not do the same but the best hope for a missing child is to keep the public believing he may still be alive. Otherwise, as sad as it is, people move on to the next case where there is still hope they can do some good.

 

[katydid23]

I totally agree! One says he loves outdoors, the video his friend made proves it to me. The other parent said way different at the initial interview....that always seemed strange to me. :twocents:

Dylan's mom's statements about him not being 'outdoorsy' were in direct response to the suggestion set forth by MR that Dylan went off on a fishing trip into the woods by himself that morning. She was not saying that Dylan did not like to play with his FRIENDS outdoors in the sun and the lake and the park.

She was saying that he was NOT one who would go by himself on a long hike ALONE, just to ' be outdoors.' JMO

 

[mmmagique]

And we saw a united front from Jessica Ridgeway's parents too. I've said from the beginning that it is hard not to judge both parents for their inability to put aside their personal differences and come together for the sake of their son.

Maybe, but...if I thought my ex had something to do with one of my children disappearing, (if I just *knew* it and believed it in my gut) I could not "form a united front" with him. I couldn't stand next to him and beg some anonymous stranger that I didn't believe existed to bring my baby home. All the while knowing in my heart it was him. (even if I were wrong)

Remember how Desiree recoiled from Terry when she tried to hug her? Something told her not to trust that woman, and she just couldn't even bring herself to fake it.

 

[dlc]

I would think a man who his ex-wife had publically, on a national level accused him of harming their son. I'd have a problem with that. He has an interview and has to set the record straight because the ex wife put a bug in everyone's ear that he's responsible for harming him. Jmo

Now I'm going to contradict myself and actually post a long post. Please note that this is entirely my own opinion.

This is my biggest problem with a lot of the well ER said something mean about MR talk. First, as has been pointed out innumerable times, this was not right after the fact, it was something like a week later. Also, quite frankly, although MR has been a bit less direct in his approach, he's certainly managed to get in more than a few digs at ER, as have many people.

Secondly, for Lord's sake, this is your child we're talking about; your baby. I have thought about this a lot, and I don't care if your ex said you were Beelzebub himself (and she did not) -- very few people are divorced because they love each other. Put that aside, stop worrying about what people think about you, or whether they're talking about you -- of course they are -- you saw your child last, unfortunately you have a record that is easily accessible via the internet -- one which is ultimately no one's responsibility but yours, and you've made some verifiable mistakes in your personal life. I do not care, I really truly don't - none of that taken alone would convince me of anything.

From day one, take the Mark Klaas route -- deliver yourself to the police, take their tests, provide a full description of your activities, eliminate yourself from the equation -- it may be unpleasant, and it may hurt, but do it. This is your baby.

Then get yourself in the media -- even if you are shy, even if some of their questions about the past are hard. Participate in searches, stand on the shore of the lake when they search for your son. Yes, people are going to be looking at you, yes, some are going to think you are guilty, but if you know in your heart you are innocent, let that truth protect you.

Parenting is hard. Being a parent of a disappeared child is unfathomably so. But this is your child, you helped bring him to this world -- he needs his father to help find him and bring him home, whatever the situation may be.

Again, IMO only.

 

[vasportsmom]

Maybe, but...if I thought my ex had something to do with one of my children disappearing, (if I just *knew* it and believed it in my gut) I could not "form a united front" with him. I couldn't stand next to him and beg some anonymous stranger that I didn't believe existed to bring my baby home. All the while knowing in my heart it was him. (even if I were wrong)

Remember how Desiree recoiled from Terry when she tried to hug her? Something told her not to trust that woman, and she just couldn't even bring herself to fake it.

You're right and that is why I put a lot of stock into what ER says and seems to believe. There is absolutely no doubt that she loves her child and wants him home. She has nothing to gain by lying or trying to misdirect the focus, in fact she has everything to lose.

 

[mmmagique]

Now I'm going to contradict myself and actually post a long post. Please note that this is entirely my own opinion.

This is my biggest problem with a lot of the well ER said something mean about MR talk. First, as has been pointed out innumerable times, this was not right after the fact, it was something like a week later. Also, quite frankly, although MR has been a bit less direct in his approach, he's certainly managed to get in more than a few digs at ER, as have many people.

Secondly, for Lord's sake, this is your child we're talking about; your baby. I have thought about this a lot, and I don't care if your ex said you were Beelzebub himself (and she did not) -- very few people are divorced because they love each other. Put that aside, stop worrying about what people think about you, or whether they're talking about you -- of course they are -- you saw your child last, unfortunately you have a record that is easily accessible via the internet -- one which is ultimately no one's responsibility but yours, and you've made some verifiable mistakes in your personal life. I do not care, I really truly don't - none of that taken alone would convince me of anything.

From day one, take the Mark Klaas route -- deliver yourself to the police, take their tests, provide a full description of your activities, eliminate yourself from the equation -- it may be unpleasant, and it may hurt, but do it. This is your baby.

Then get yourself in the media -- even if you are shy, even if some of their questions about the past are hard. Participate in searches, stand on the shore of the lake when they search for your son. Yes, people are going to be looking at you, yes, some are going to think you are guilty, but if you know in your heart you are innocent, let that truth protect you.

Parenting is hard. Being a parent of a disappeared child is unfathomably so. But this is your child, you helped bring him to this world -- he needs his father to help him find him and bring him home, whatever the situation may be.

Again, IMO only.

Sierra Lamar's father was a great example of what to do, even if...

 

[vasportsmom]

Now I'm going to contradict myself and actually post a long post. Please note that this is entirely my own opinion.

This is my biggest problem with a lot of the well ER said something mean about MR talk. First, as has been pointed out innumerable times, this was not right after the fact, it was something like a week later. Also, quite frankly, although MR has been a bit less direct in his approach, he's certainly managed to get in more than a few digs at ER, as have many people.

Secondly, for Lord's sake, this is your child we're talking about; your baby. I have thought about this a lot, and I don't care if your ex said you were Beelzebub himself (and she did not) -- very few people are divorced because they love each other. Put that aside, stop worrying about what people think about you, or whether they're talking about you -- of course they are -- you saw your child last, unfortunately you have a record that is easily accessible via the internet -- one which is ultimately no one's responsibility but yours, and you've made some verifiable mistakes in your personal life. I do not care, I really truly don't - none of that taken alone would convince me of anything.

From day one, take the Mark Klaas route -- deliver yourself to the police, take their tests, provide a full description of your activities, eliminate yourself from the equation -- it may be unpleasant, and it may hurt, but do it. This is your baby.

Then get yourself in the media -- even if you are shy, even if some of their questions about the past are hard. Participate in searches, stand on the shore of the lake when they search for your son. Yes, people are going to be looking at you, yes, some are going to think you are guilty, but if you know in your heart you are innocent, let that truth protect you.

Parenting is hard. Being a parent of a disappeared child is unfathomably so. But this is your child, you helped bring him to this world -- he needs his father to help him find him and bring him home, whatever the situation may be.

Again, IMO only.

Bravo! This is a really great post with no bias whatsoever. The thanks button wasn't enough.

 

[asyousay]

Dylan's mom's statements about him not being 'outdoorsy' were in direct response to the suggestion set forth by MR that Dylan went off on a fishing trip into the woods by himself that morning. She was not saying that Dylan did not like to play with his FRIENDS outdoors in the sun and the lake and the park.

She was saying that he was NOT one who would go by himself on a long hike ALONE, just to ' be outdoors.' JMO

Great post and when you look at this in reference to the texts , Dylan going off alone to fish simply does not add up.

IMHO

 

[momrids6]

I still can't get past why we have heard no explanation for why the phone was off. Even if it is an "I didn't know it died" something.

I blame LE for not releasing the information. I also have not seen where the question was ever asked of Mr. Redwine. Of course, LE does have things they do not want discussed- and they may have had a hand it what was or was not asked.

 

[LotusPawprint]

MR turned down numerous opportunities for comments and interviews about his missing son in the first week .. everything from not returning or answering media phone calls to "I'd know they're looking for my son, but I'd prefer not to say anything. I'd prefer to let the investigators do their work."
That's certainly his choice to make, but it was HIS CHOICE. He preferred not to say anything.

Forget about waiting for the local press coming to me, I'd be knocking down their doors, screaming, pleading and begging every media outlet to print my child's picture and story before they even got to me. I wouldn't have the opportunity to miss a phone call, but MR seems to miss (or ignore) CR's, ER's and just about everyone else's. I know MR supposedly keeps things pent up and isn't comfortable being in the spotlight, but get over yourself, your kid's missing.


I think it's really important to note that on Friday 11/23, the DH reported that [ER] declined to talk about her former spouse except to say he rarely exercised his visitation rights.

It was only the following Monday that she expressed her public concerns about what MR could be capable of based on her experience with him.

THEN and only then did hedecide to start speaking out publicly, letting us know that his problem was his ex-wife... and oh yeah, that missing son of his.

IMO, that speaks volumes. What causes him to act-- or rather, react? He prefers not to say anything when his child is missing, not to be proactive and be his son's voice. But he has no problem acting -- or rather reacting in a quick and timely manner when something REALLY gets under his skin -- an observation that he could possibly harm his son.
And we know that he's never taken a swing at his son or anything.

To me, it's great insight into what makes MR tick. But that's just me.

 

[kkdj]

You're right and that is why I put a lot of stock into what ER says and seems to believe. There is absolutely no doubt that she loves her child and wants him home. She has nothing to gain by lying or trying to misdirect the focus, in fact she has everything to lose.

This is exactly what I think!