There is something I must say as throughout this case, the attitude and comments from family members and some of the public has displayed a common misconception that hinders investigation or detection of child abuse - the common denominator is ' Relisha enjoyed going with KT, she doesn't look scared on that video..She wasn't frightened of him or didn't want to go any place with him, she was always happy to see him etc' In the words of one family member' This wasn't a child who cried to not go with KT, this was a child who cried to go WITH KT'.
Now, children who are being groomed then abused, will still go with the abuser peacefully. The nature of child abuse is so very manipulative and psychological, that even by the time the child is being physically harmed, they may not show signs of distress when in the company of their abuser, it will manifest in other ways. Stomach aches, headaches or bed wetting, aggression or acting out ..
Many people miss the signs of abuse in their own children because the common belief that a child will show fear in the presence of their abuser - it is just rarely so. Sometimes the child is so brainwashed and confused that they will not show fear or say they do not want to go with so- and - so because they feel dirty, or they may get into trouble if they say why, as adults will always ask the questions a child fears to answer as they just cannot cope with saying it.
A child is still a child, no matter what goes on they tend to still play and still act semi - normal, which is why it is so hard to detect unless you see a change in that child, even a slight one.
I would have happily gone with my abuser/s and did so for months because I was groomed and given the affection and attention I was lacking at home, plus by the time things got bad I was petrified of them telling anyone - they brainwash you into thinking it's normal and its your fault , that if you tell you will be the one who nobody believes and gets into trouble etc, you family will go to prison if you tell etc.
My Father was so aggressive and my home life so violent that I thought If I say anything my Dad will kill someone and go to prison again, or they will take it out on me and it will harm my siblings etc..its very soul destroying. Its a trust issue - children will still trust an abuser as they are innocent children and what happened yesterday may not happen again, in their eyes or the abuser explains it away. Relishas home life was turbulent, she would have been wary of causing a 'fuss'.
Relisha would have been programmed not to say anything to SY anyway, so if SY was as groomed as she , SY could delude herself and be in denial about what was happening easily, or SY could have continued her blind eye unquestioned and oblivious.
Its very mind controlling, abusers rely on that to maintain the control.
So every comment I saw and have seen , plus heard saying how Relisha wasn't scared of KT etc , like that's a sure sign he was kind to her and definitely not harming her etc, makes me feel very frustrated, especially for children of adults who are unaware right now of what's going on because of this naïve assumption.
Because that explanation was used so much during this investigation early on and backed up by so many it really made it harder for LE to maintain that a crime may have been committed and to get the support they needed to move faster.
