Part 3 - Notes from conversation with Brandi Neal and Tyler Vaughan -Moms4Missing YouTube link posted above.
They talked about how the neighborhood has changed. At the time M went missing there was only one ring camera on their street, and not many in the subdivisions. Immediately afterward, people in their 3 city area started buying cameras. Before M went missing, there were always children outside playing and riding their bikes in the neighborhood ("neighborhood" includes 2 subdivisions) but that has changed. BN said that previously, during the school year, they would always see a lot of kids waiting at the school bus stop; now there are parents sitting in their cars at the bus stop waiting until the kids are safely on the bus. 152:35
They were asked if they were aggravated by anything inaccurate that had been reported about them. TV said it was inaccurate when it was said that he and BN were taking donations. He said that they never asked for donations and they have not taken one penny. Any money that has been donated to them has gone into the reward fund. It also bothers him when he hears that he was home alone with M and the baby when M went missing, when actually the two oldest children were also there. 123:14 BN said that is her fault, because she had tried to keep the children out of the spotlight. 129:01 BN said that it bothers her when people say that they let their children run willy nilly and leave them unsupervised. She did say, however, that M had slipped out before through the back door and the garage. The question people ask them that bothers them most is "How are you doing?" They say that they understand that it is human nature to ask, but how do you answer that? 111:06
BN said to go back to the question about things that were aggravating to them, she wanted to comment that it drives her crazy when people say "this is what I would be doing." In her words, "I honestly could never imagine being in our shoes. I could never imagine what a mother is going through, a father is going through, a family is going through, and the continuous...'well, this is what I would be doing, this is what I would be doing' There have been a few times that I have lashed out and said, 'you know what, how in the h---, please, please tell me how in the h--- would you know what you would do, how you would act if every breath, every sigh, every blink you take; if you lick your lips, if you move in a certain way; please tell me exactly what you would do, because you have absolutely no idea what in the h--- you would do, nobody does unless you've actually lived the situation.' And that is a very, very big one to me." 139:20
They touch upon how difficult it has been to have some people accusing them of harming M. BN said that it is not only social media, sometimes it is in person too, but she has nothing to hide so people can speculate. She said that someone walked up to her at work and said "you killed your child." 18:45 She said that there was a local business owner who refused to put M's poster in the window of the business, because they were starting to believe all of the speculation. 20:15 TV said that he doesn't understand how people think he could have harmed M and removed the evidence, all in a few minutes, in front of the other children. 25:26 It is really difficult when it involves the children. BN said that the oldest daughter started her freshman year in high school just one week after M went missing. On her 5th day of school, she phoned her mother from the bathroom at school, crying, and asked if she could come home. She said that some of the kids at school had said that her mom and dad had killed her brother. BN told her she would be right there to pick her up. BN said that her ex-husband's mother-in-law (later she said his mother), who she said is a saint, took charge and went to the school the next day to talk to the principal and teachers and they were very kind and understanding. There hasn't been any problem at the school since then. 89:50
BN says that she reads every single message she receives. She just asks that people please not send tips to her -- sometimes seeing them is very, very difficult. Tips should be sent to the tip line. The police have always followed up when BN and TV have asked them to check out a tip. They even followed up on a tip in Greece. Someone sent two pictures to BN of a little boy in Greece who spoke English with an American accent and looked something like M. The parents knew it wasn't M, but the little boy looked so sad, and looked like he had a black-eye, so they asked LE if they could arrange for someone to check on his welfare. LE followed through and it turned out the the boy was being abused, and he was removed from the home. BN and TV felt good that at least one child had been helped. 118:00
They talked about the Amber Alert -- the police wanted one, but weren't able to get approval. Now that the police are saying it was an abduction, M still doesn't meet the Amber Alert criteria, because in Idaho the alert has to go out within 12 hours and that time is long past. There was a Code Red Endangered Alert for M, which is an opt-in alert, and was something that BN and TV hadn't known about. Many people in the area probably don't know about it, but even still it was received by those who had opted-in, and some of them immediately came to help. When BN arrived home from work, after receiving a call from TV, she said there were about 40 people on their front lawn. Volunteers helped search throughout the night. They talked about some of the changes they think should be made to the alert system when a child goes missing. They think that when a child is reported missing, an alert should go out within 30 minutes and be spread out to other areas over time. For instance, if an alert went out in Fruitland, ID, and the child still hadn't been found an hour later, an alert would go out as far as Boise, and in 2 - 3 hours it would go out to all of the western states. As time passed, the alert would continue going farther until it was nationwide. They have been talking about working on "Monkey's Law." 220:04