jodi arias TAKES THE STAND FOR 11TH DAY #57 *may contain graphic and adult content*

[StephanieHartPI]

Ok, I'll take the bait.

I used to be one of those girls. And dont worry, I finally did receive professional counseling to break the pattern. I used to not only snoop on each and every boyfriend, but more importantly I *chose* boyfriends who were self-fulfilling prophecies. In other words, I was attracted to guys who were most likely to cheat or flirt or have straying eye. It was my need to fix, manage, and control that allowed me to pick poor suitors and distrust them enough to invade their privacy. Why? Because it's easier to "fix" and manage someone else than to turn the mirror on yourself and fix your own messy life. At least thats why I paid hundreds of dollars to come to understand ;-)

But to your point -no - it is not the norm and it is not healthy. But a lot of people do do it, and not all are bad or sociopaths. At least I don't think. I mean I haven't killed anyone. Lol! But seriously it's definitely not healthy.

Ok excellent post, this was also my thought, the reason I may not have done it, is I had no sixth sense that was nagging at me and maybe due to my choice in men.

However, if one is in a habit (and heck it can be a habit, we go toward what we are used to, what we are used to is often more comfortable that breaking a habit)

So in going after something we are used to, one might find themselves with a person that they have all kinds of doubts about all over again, and then yes, this pattern of needing to see what the heck is going on will emerge again.

I can't say the idea of knowing every detail of their thoughts does not peak my interest. I do understand that.

I think with Jodi she drove them away with her behavior, the sum total of her behavior, not any one thing. She seemed to move to a new one so quickly she can't possibly know them and can't possibly be over the last one.

I find her to be incapable of having a real meaningful relationship even with siblings. And she never thought anything she did was bad so she kept on with this pattern.

It's still not her fault...

 

[LizardQueen74]

It is highly unusual to go through every boyfriend's emails, text messages and phone records. I have never done it. Most women and men I know have said they don't or never have done such a thing.

That said, there is a breed of woman I have met who do this regularly. I call them the drama mamas. They are constantly accusing their significant other of cheating, constantly need to know exactly where the other is at all times, every minute of the day, when their man is even five minutes late it causes all sorts of suspicion and drama, the guy invariably pays for an extended time, whether he has done anything shady or not. Eventually the guy feels like WTH? I am paying for the crime so why not at least enjoy committing it?

These drama mamas of which I speak need to be in control to the nth degree, and they almost invariably create the very thing they are so on the lookout for. A sort of self fulfilling prophecy effect.

It would appear JA has engaged in this sort of relationship dynamic since HS.

There are also men who do the same. My ex not only hacked my accounts but accused me all the time. I never was or did cheat but it was exhausting to continuously feel you're being watched. In the end, he only made me better at concealing things. Like having a separate email accounts I never accessed at home.

 

[kscornfed]

I don't understand the judge leniancy either with allowing Nurmi to control when court ends, etc.

I understand not wanting appeal issues, but it is ridiculous the judge is allowing Nurmi to control so many things. The other day, he told the judge it was a good time to break for the day, and she obliged. I would tell him to take a seat and the judge will be the one to tell when court starts and ends.

At least she seems somewhat fair to both sides though. I dont sense any favoring to one side or the other. She lets both sides control her court. :floorlaugh:

It feels to me like this court is in such fear of a problem with this trial or with the verdict being overturned, that the defense has been given an awful lot of leeway.

 

[katydid23]

:blushing: I have. And ended up breaking an engagement over it. Red Flags of him online in middle of night (he was chatting) led me to sleuth him........ and then dump him. :blushing: and yep.........on my way out the door, I let the girl that he was seeing know that we had been living together, and what was happening on my end. I know that many many think that doing such is an invasion of privacy, but I'll be d*(*ed if I get into a marriage with someone like that. (And the man.....lied through his teeth)... Nope, I didn't kill him......just moved on. :blush:

Don't throw rotten apples please!

No rotten apples coming from me, but you were in a different situation. You were living with your boyfriend and contemplating marriage. I have no problem with you sleuthing his late night computer activity. :wink:

But Jodi and Travis were not even dating anymore, and lived 1000 miles away from each other and she was still snooping/hacking/ trespassing/peeping in on him.

 

[elementary]

No......I'm not crazy or taking pills. IF, big if, she has been denied food as Nurmi is suggesting, that she is not getting any lunch and court has to be over by 4:30 so she does not miss dinner than yes that is cruel. I did not say that I think that is the case. She has been on trial now, how many days, and suddenly when she lets a word slip out that basically makes her look bad she used her wild card. I can't imagine them not providing her with something to eat. If she decided not to bring it because she felt her attorneys would get her her lunch than that is her fault and she has disrupted the court because of that fact. I don't think she is not getting fed. I think she is not eating.....big difference. And why has it taken her defense team so long to bring this to the attention of the judge. They had to have known about it. What I'm saying is it WOULD be cruel for them to do this, but I really don't think they did. It's just Jodi thinking if she brings nothing her team will feel sorry for her and buy her a burger and fries, which she will never get again. It's her last chance. But, no. I have not lost my senses. Think about it. She leave early in the morning after breakfast so she would have to bring something from her tray. If they are only feed twice a day it's what she does eveyday. I don't think the courthouse jail serves food. lol

I hear you, LambChop. Cruelty, in my books, is what happened to Travis- the stabs, the slit throat, the shot to the head. He suffered. I can't imagine that the seeming lack of "nourishment" once in a while (and as opposed to starvation) could remotely compare to that.

Btw, her defence might imply that she was "denied" food. Really??? Who actually believes that?

 

[Boodles]

OT -- but a lighter Gus Searcy post; to keep up with the man who claims he does not want to be in the lime-light !Here's his Face Book post-of-the-day:
Gus Searcy
I will be on the CNN Anderson Cooper Show 10pm eastern time. This Friday. it will be a much longer and in depth segment

I love Anderson (in my top 10 of greatest smiles ever). He'll ask the right questions and get to the bottom of Gus' confusion (IMO), if at all possible.

 

[FrayedKnot]

:blushing: I have. And ended up breaking an engagement over it. Red Flags of him online in middle of night (he was chatting) led me to sleuth him........ and then dump him. :blushing: and yep.........on my way out the door, I let the girl that he was seeing know that we had been living together, and what was happening on my end. I know that many many think that doing such is an invasion of privacy, but I'll be d*(*ed if I get into a marriage with someone like that. (And the man.....lied through his teeth)... Nope, I didn't kill him......just moved on. :blush:

Don't throw rotten apples please!

Snooping is how my BFF found out that not only was her husband and father of her two babies cheating on her and planning to run off with the woman, but that he had gotten chlymadia (sp?) from her. :what:

She read his emails and there it all was!

Of course, he talked her out of divorcing him. :banghead:

They had another child a year later.

 

[Truth Detector]

I can't even begin to describe how disgusted I am with this defense attorney. He is dislikable, petty, childish, churlish, arrogant and unprofessional. I'm sorry if this offends anyone, but he makes Jose Baez look good.

This judge NEEDS to take control of her courtroom. This is not Nurmi's courtroom, it is HER courtroom. When on earth has anyone heard of an attorney dictating the hours court will be in session? Anyone remember Judge Belvin Perry saying he would work them six days a week, 12 hours a day if necessary?

I can't speak! :furious:

Spot on; I posted similar comments earlier.

Jodi Arias is making a mockery out of Judge Stephens's Court, with Her Honor's permission.

The judge, her Court, counsel, and the jurors are all being disrespected by the defendant.

 

[artsy1]

No rotten apples coming from me, but you were in a different situation. You were living with your boyfriend and contemplating marriage. I have no problem with you sleuthing his late night computer activity. :wink:

But Jodi and Travis were not even dating anymore, and lived 1000 miles away from each other and she was still snooping/hacking/ trespassing/peeping in on him.

BBM

Good point! Add to that the fact that she felt it was still acceptable to just let herself into his house that fateful day.

With all the times that she let herself into his house after they broke up, I have to wonder if she was trying to catch him with another woman.... :waitasec:

 

[thefragile7393]

I think the state would have been better off with a female prosecutor. Juan is too "aggressive" and she is using using this as excuses for HER behaviour.

Hmm...Kelly Siegler would be a great prosecutor for her.

 

[StephanieHartPI]

What I want to know is why can't Jodi keep a guy from straying soon after being with her?

It seems like Jodi is more than willing to do it all to give them pleasure, and yet all her boyfriends seem to get busted for stll looking for a better gf.

Is she inferior to her three hole wonder reputation? She's not so wonder or full perhaps.

I would love to ask each one of them. Was she smothering, controlling, behaved oddly soon after they started to go out. It had to be a few things to start and end this many relationships in your young life.

And with Travis I clearly see her becoming obsessed with him and he would not get away. I felt she was "sort of" obsessed with the others but every now and then a stalker type, or addictive personality meets up with a certain person and as she did, felt she just can't shake thoughts of him, she left, they broke up but she would not let him go. It has to be simply the effect he had on her that the others did not quite have.

Sadly, thats why he is dead

 

[polleypockets]

Out of curiosity, was Jodi given bail, I had always assumed she had no bail but a poster a few pages back, said had she had money she would be out on bail.

Was she given a bail and what amount if so?

TIA

IIRC it was $2,000,000 bail - idl but i would think if she could bail out she would still be out on bail during her trial?

 

[KPinMN]

Respectfully snipped...

When Jodi told JM that she was bothered by his posture, tone, and anger, I recalled how my sister used to convene family meetings so that she could tell us (all adults) how we should treat her. This is typical of borderlines - the rest of the world has to abide by their rules and never say or do anything that the borderline does not like or cannot tolerate. This is best described by family members and/or anyone who comes in contact with the borderline as "walking on eggshells", and, trust me, it's not pretty.

Jodi is extremely judgmental of other people and does not see her own shortcomings, weaknesses, faults. I think that it's safe to say that Jodi was likely a tattletale at a very young age and was always reporting the (perceived) bad behaviors of others in an attempt to get them in trouble with parents, teachers, etc. My sister started doing this when she was about five and even made up tall tales to get siblings and classmates in trouble. Unfortunately, as the baby of the family, she was favored (especially by our mother) and usually succeeded in accomplishing what she set out to do.

Thankfully, my sister (now 56) responded well to medications and therapy and no longer displays many of her earlier behaviors, but it took many years and caused tremendous stress for our family. I doubt that Jodi would benefit from treatment because she is far too set in her ways and does not think that she needs to change. Jodi wants everyone to adapt to the "world according to Jodi". :moo:

My mom also had BPD, but refuses to acknowledge it, nor be truthful enough with her mental health providers to get a proper diagnosis and therapy. In any case, those behaviors you described of needing everyong to follow their rules, walking on eggshells around them, and being a tattletale are true for my mom too. She also needs her feelings to always be acknowledged as more important than yours and if you don't it leads to an argument, crying, yelling, and/or the threat of suicide. I think JA displays many of the BPD behaviors along with sociopathy. MOO

 

[ElleElle]

My statement has nothing to do with whether he get a conviction. It is about the flow of the trial. *yawn* the sex talk etc... is BORING.

Oh geez. Really? This is the best you can come up with? He WILL get a conviction. Goodnight.

 

[lil_buddy]

I think snooping is OK unless it becomes pathological.
At some point you gotta decide - trust em or dump em.
Dump em and continue snooping is definitely not a healthy option.

 

[Hatfield]

What I want to know is why can't Jodi keep a guy from straying soon after being with her?

It seems like Jodi is more than willing to do it all to give them pleasure, and yet all her boyfriends seem to get busted for stll looking for a better gf.

Is she inferior to her three hole wonder reputation? She's not so wonder or full perhaps.

I sense she is so suffocating to the guys that they run for the hills. She seems controlling, possessive, jealous, etc. It doesnt take them long to figure out she is unreasonably jealous for no good reason. I am sure she showed her jealous tendencies right away. She is probably one of those people that would get jealous even if a guy made an innocent glance at another woman.

In fact, I know she is. Remember the story when Travis had to hold up the drunk girl from falling down. Jodi freaked out and that story sounded innocent.

 

[TexMex]

I just don't like the dishonesty of it. It's not about lunch or hunger. She's not fuzzy minded. Her lawyer wanted to stop her testimony, which wasn't going well for her. That's what I don't like.

Had to laugh when she argued with JM that she did not "immediately leave work" when she found out about Matt (an ex!) "cheating" with Briana (I think that's her name). JM said "you didn't leave work and immediately drive an hour and a half to confront this girl"?

Miss Smartass replies that she "had five minutes of side work left to do THEN I left the restaurant."

 

[paperwing]

I think the state would have been better off with a female prosecutor. Juan is too "aggressive" and she is using using this as excuses for HER behaviour.

A female prosecutor - like Kelly Siegler? HAHAHAHA!! Makes JM look like a veritable cream puff.

I think he's brilliant and I don't see how gender factors in. The state is doing just fine with JM, considering his record - including putting another woman on AZ's DR.

He is focused, determined, passionate and I personally appreciate the fact that he doesn't defer to gender roles by treating the defendant more 'gently' simply because she's female.

Have you seen the autopsy photos that show what she did to this young man? Her prosecution should be relentless and aggressive and there is no one better than JM imv.

 

[Nova]

Minor, would an appellate attorney be in court at this point or more likely after a conviction (err.. potential conviction)?

The appellate attorneys I know wouldn't see much point, as a rule. If something doesn't end up in the official trial transcript it "didn't happen" for purposes of appeals. (I'm sure there's some exception where video proved the official transcript was in error, but basically...)

 

[lonetraveler]

Really? You actually think she would tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth?

Maybe you need to read my post again that you replied to. I said that after lunch she began to tell the truth about enjoying the sex. Prior to this, she was an unwilling woman who just did it for Travis's pleasure.