With recent discussion regarding Mr. G, thought I’d share an article about the stages of grief as I think it might be playing a role in how Steve G expresses himself sometimes and imo wears his emotions/heart on his sleeve which not a bad thing at all but imo opens him up to more scrutiny as he’s been a publically vocal presence advocating for justice for his viciously murdered beloved Daughter and her three viciously murdered friends. Of course the other families have been advocating for justice for their children/all the parents’ children as well just imo not as publicly/vocally as SG.
I think it’s important to remember that everyone is different and processes grief differently and that one of the hardest things in life for any parent to endure is the loss of their child, and I’d imagine especially so when it’s sudden/unexpected, due to being violently attacked and murdered. As a parent who fortunately hasn’t lost a child, I cannot fathom what all of these parents’ are going through and even though I don’t agree with asking people to call the court/Judge to try and influence/sway his decision (think there are more constructive ways to let the court know you’re not happy with their decisions, maybe write an email or letter etc.) but understand his anger and frustration in his not feeling the plea deal is in the best interests of justice for his Daughter. Some or none of us may agree with his sentiment.
I personally don’t agree with his sentiment regarding the plea agreement but realize my feelings are irrelevant to his, the Father of a brutally murdered full of life promising young woman, my God, unimaginable! SG is entitled to his feelings as are all the other parents’ involved. I don’t have to agree with some of the things he says and/or does and feel immense compassion and sympathy for him at the same time.
Back to grief, my bet is they aren’t all experiencing the same stages of grief at the same time and it sometimes takes longer for some people to move between the different stages. I have so much sympathy for all of the parents’ and stepparents’ involved, my heart breaks for their loss of their precious beautiful children.
Having said all of that, I’m hoping that as Mr. G moves further through the stages of grief, he can come to some sense of peace as I believe his beloved Daughter Kaylee would want that for him. Because SG’s imo been the most vocal grieving parent, gauging from his interviews I’ve seen and his expression of his thoughts and comments, my personal unprofessional opinion is that he may be experiencing/still in the anger stage of his grief and/or somewhere between or transitioning from anger to bargaining based on the NN video clip I watched of him last night where in part, apologized to Kaylee for not doing enough for her (broke my heart) which would fall under bargaining going by the descriptions under each stage of grief.
Also he mentioned not making a victim impact statement and I truly hope he rethinks that as imo he needs to speak directly to the monster which imo could be very cathartic in his journey toward moving through his grief and healing the pain of some of his internal wounds so to speak.
I snipped the two stages of grief Anger and Bargaining and how people going through the Anger stage can sometimes misdirect their anger and perhaps that is what SG is doing misdirecting his anger by lashing out at Prosecutors, Judge etc. as an outlet for what I imagine could go towards overwhelming anger. I thought it might be helpful understanding how a person who has lost a child and grieving can feel for them, and how it can look to/come across to others.
Snipped and
BBM:
You may have heard people talk about the
stages of grief. The truth is, while these stages are common grief reactions,
everyone grieves differently, especially when grieving for a child.
The five stages of grief typically include denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.
Anger. Anger can be directed toward many people or things: yourself, God, doctors, or whoever else may be responsible (
from your perspective) for the death of your child. In some cases, this anger may truly be justified, but outbursts will still only serve to push away your support system.
Anger in grief may feel like:
- Rage
- Resentment
- Frustration
- Impatience
- Embarrassment
- A lack of control
To others, your anger may be seen as:
- Sarcasm
- Cynicism
- Pessimism
- Irritability
- Passive-aggression
- Aggression
- Eagerness to fight
- Increased drug or alcohol use
Bargaining. Bargaining isn’t always about making a deal with a deity. Instead,
bargaining often strives to get to the root cause of the tragedy you are experiencing. It may involve asking, “What did we do to deserve this?” It may also involve intense feelings of guilt as you search for a cause.
Internally, bargaining may feel like:
- Guilt
- Blame
- Shame
- Insecurity
- Anxiety/fear
To others, bargaining may be seen as:
- Judgment toward yourself and others
- Thinking or saying “I should have…” or “If only I had…”
- Assuming the worst about the future
- Ruminating on the past or what the future may bring
- Perfectionism
- Overthinking and anxiety
Losing a child is never easy. Learn more about the stages of grief and how to cope with your loss.
www.webmd.com
IMHOO
Kaylee,Maddie,Xana,Ethan, you’ll never be forgotten. xx