SIDEBAR #50 - Arias/Alexander forum

[Bernina]

Morning/Afternoon all! :wave:

first - I just talked with my little bro and he said he has a very lousy primary doctor; he just didn't want to do anything to help him!!??!! :gaah: so he called up UCLA Medical (he lives down in Southern Calif.) and they said come on in!! So he'll be going down there Friday, I believe he said. He's right now trying to get SSD and SSI (he just turned 62) and maybe State help. He said he is bloated and his feet are swollen at times. Has a great appetite. Just hurts when he tries to stand or sit down. He said he'd keep me updated on "what" UCLA has to say! Hoping for a better resolution than that primary care doctor! So keep your fingers crossed and prayers would be good too! :loveyou:

*snipped*

Niner,
Some docs look at the cause of a person's Hep C, and if it's drug related, they just don't care. Doesn't matter if someone's got their head together and been clean for decades. Not cool at all.
Your bro should have no problem getting getting SSI, it all depends on if he had taxable income. If he didn't, he can get SSDI. I may have the acronyms screwed up........
Does he have cirrhosis of the liver? That puts a kink in things, it could be what's bloating and swelling his feet up. My ex totally thrashed his liver, it actually shredded and he was bleeding internally. Don't know why he lived:
He walked into an emergency room up in Northern Cali, and promptly passed out. He'd been living on the streets for 3+ years, doing drugs and drinking this cheap garbage called Cisco (sp?) between fixes. He had already been diagnosed with Hep C, but some people don't get that reality check, if you know what I mean.
They ran a bunch of tests on him and found his liver had tears in it. They took him into surgery, tried their best to sew it up, and put him in the CCU............and his liver was so messed up, the stitches or whatever they put in it, blew out. They couldn't find the bleed, let alone stop it when they did finally find it, nothing left to fix. He was in a coma for 5 days and the hospital was trying to get a hold of my daughter because back then, if you weren't married, your children had the right to do what they were going to do as far as DNR if you didn't have that taken care of.
My daughter and her husband were out on a heroin bender, she wouldn't answer her phone, and her stupid in-laws refused to tell anyone in the family where she was or pass on any messages.
Just when I thought I'd be saddled with THAT particular decision, the ex woke up. 8 lives down, 1 left as far as his "cat lives".
Among all the various medications and Methadone he takes, there's a diuretic he takes that makes him pee like a race horse to keep the bloating and swelling at bay. Depending on how he feels, he may be in a wheel chair, or using a cane, but it definitely effects his mobility. He's also on pain meds (lortab (Vicodin) the last I heard), but because of his addiction history, he doesn't get anything that he "says" works, but his idea of pain relief is getting high, not relieving his pain. So he was trading or selling his pain meds for "other" stuff.

The ex DOES have cirrhosis. And the list for transplants is incredibly long, he doesn't qualify, more than likely because of his drug and alcohol history. He would have been in a long term care facility, but my sil/foster sister is the mother hen that takes care of everyone. She took care of my bil his last few years before he died from complications of AIDS (gay, not drugs). Ex has his own place and sil gets his groceries and such.

I hope your bro can get some good care!!!! As long as there's a doc that listens, there's hope.

 

[Love Never Fails]

I have a question: How do you break up with a friend?

The reason I am asking is because a poster near and dear to all of us, has been friends with a person for over 15 years. When said poster found true love in an unconventional manner and subsequently got married recently, this "friend" has not wished said person well, has not joined in any of the Celebratory activities, has not "liked" one FB post or picture. Nothing.

The "friend" has not extended herself in any way to be nice, avoids discussion about the romance topic like the plague, and is talking behind our dear poster's back in the ugliest manner possible. This "friend" has never met the poster's now husband, but criticizes any way to anyone who will listen.

So what do you do? It is very painful for our friend. Since we all have her back, what would you wise folks do? Or say, if anything?

Zuri,
Just reading here and find this post incredibly sad since we love our special poster. I am so direct I would expect someone be direct with me also. Maybe avoiding the person at all costs, for posters own sanity is the answer. If the so called friend asks her why she is being avoided, she should be direct and no nonsense about it. What said friend is doing to our poster is nothing short of cruelty. Btw, I saw the beautiful pictures of the shower and what you did for her was absolutely amazing. God bless you!

 

[franquerolane]

Zuri,
Just reading here and find this post incredibly sad since we love our special poster. I am so direct I would expect someone be direct with me also. Maybe avoiding the person at all costs, for posters own sanity is the answer. If the so called friend asks her why she is being avoided, she should be direct and no nonsense about it. What said friend is doing to our poster is nothing short of cruelty. Btw, I saw the beautiful pictures of the shower and what you did for her was absolutely amazing. God bless you!

I know I am opening a painful can of worms here, and I only wish the very best for the bride, but I must admit, when I read of how quickly everything happened,a sense of unease that history may be repeating itself . Maybe the long time friend also felt that unease.

 

[coffeejunkie]

Niner

You've got my prayers for your brother....

 

[coffeejunkie]

FIRST PICTURES OF THE BABY ROBINS



You can see how young they are. Momma is a good Momma...she feeds them a lot! If you look really close you can see the starting of the 'hole' in the egg. Soon will have 3!

 

[GigiG]

Morning/Afternoon all! :wave:

first - I just talked with my little bro and he said he has a very lousy primary doctor; he just didn't want to do anything to help him!!??!! :gaah: so he called up UCLA Medical (he lives down in Southern Calif.) and they said come on in!! So he'll be going down there Friday, I believe he said. He's right now trying to get SSD and SSI (he just turned 62) and maybe State help. He said he is bloated and his feet are swollen at times. Has a great appetite. Just hurts when he tries to stand or sit down. He said he'd keep me updated on "what" UCLA has to say! Hoping for a better resolution than that primary care doctor! So keep your fingers crossed and prayers would be good too! :loveyou:

okay - Bernina and Zuri - ??
..Bay or sorrel color... will dapple, then freckle.... roan out... few paints and buskins.... :waitasec: :lol: don't know what you all are talking about!! :silly: but sounds interesting!

coffeejunkie - :waiting: for those pictures of baby Robins...

Zuri - re internet friends... :gaah: LOL! I agree with what Bernina said - "life is too short"!! I believe I can guess "who" this married friend is, but not the other one...

Feeling better now that I've talked with my little bro... :sigh:

and WHERE is YESorNO??? Haven't seen her lately...

later! :seeya:

BBM:

That is great news! Hope is alive and well. Sending positive thoughts your way...

 

[Niner]

:tyou: everyone for the nice thoughts and prayers!!

Yes, once he gets a doctor at UCLA I believe things will be better for him. I'll keep you all updated when I hear anything. Haven't talked to my little bro in about 2 years - he was mad at me... anyway!!

Ugly little birds coffeejunkie!! :laughing: I can see the white hole!!

Okay - signing off for the night! See you all tomorrow!
Take care everyone!

:wave:

 

[GigiG]

I have a question: How do you break up with a friend?

The reason I am asking is because a poster near and dear to all of us, has been friends with a person for over 15 years. When said poster found true love in an unconventional manner and subsequently got married recently, this "friend" has not wished said person well, has not joined in any of the Celebratory activities, has not "liked" one FB post or picture. Nothing.

The "friend" has not extended herself in any way to be nice, avoids discussion about the romance topic like the plague, and is talking behind our dear poster's back in the ugliest manner possible. This "friend" has never met the poster's now husband, but criticizes any way to anyone who will listen.

So what do you do? It is very painful for our friend. Since we all have her back, what would you wise folks do? Or say, if anything?

Zuri, I have found that a very effective way of dealing with those kind of people is to treat them as being better than they are showing themselves to be at the moment. Appeal to their higher goodness.

Speak to them with an assured message that "certainly, (they) would want the best for someone (anyone) else." Not so subtly insinuating that that's just how nice people are. Casually remind them of all the good qualities of the person they are failing to support at this time. (This can be implied and generalized; no specifics required.)

Very few people want to go too far in taking a stand when the vast majority of others whom they respect will look down upon them for doing so. Gently encouraging that person to take the high road can be a win-win.

If this person was ever a real friend, they will be able to see their reflection in the mirror you're putting it in front of them, and see themself in a negative way regarding the poor behavior they've been exhibiting of late (rude, insensitive, hurtful).

Not sure if I'm expressing myself very well. Suffice it to say that my tactic would be to gently "shame" that person. If they have any conscience whatsoever, that should give them enough of a wake-up call. If not, they aren't worth the time or trouble.

JMO

 

[Spellbound]

FIRST PICTURES OF THE BABY ROBINS

View attachment 75034

You can see how young they are. Momma is a good Momma...she feeds them a lot! If you look really close you can see the starting of the 'hole' in the egg. Soon will have 3!

Oooh.... the poor little naked babies. We spent the afternoon watching our nearly grown Robin babies learning to fly.
Sadly, my dog caught one of them a few days ago. But these little ones sure know how to run out through the fence! What amazed me today, when the babies were running about I glanced up at their nest ..... and a dove is sitting in it!

Your pics and descriptions of your nest have been as good as any web cam on a nest. So cool!

 

[Chelly]

FIRST PICTURES OF THE BABY ROBINS

View attachment 75034

You can see how young they are. Momma is a good Momma...she feeds them a lot! If you look really close you can see the starting of the 'hole' in the egg. Soon will have 3!

Ohhhhh coffeejunkie! You got your baby robins. Doing the happy dance.!!!!:happydance:

 

[daisymae]

Did Sheriff Joe ever release the reports we were waiting for on Jodi? Just wondering.

 

[Zuri]

I probably would do nothing. Is "recently married" bothered by this? Knowing her heart, probably --- but she also knows how to move on. Seems our truest friends support us, whether they agree with our choices or not, or at least wish us well. Said "poster" does not sound like much of a friend, perhaps just hung on to the skirt tails for the excitement of the "ride"? I probably would never confide anything to "said poster", just because I know how she treated this dear friend. Sad when a marriage can come between dear friends in this way, but it happens. Perhaps "poster" feels pushed down the friendship ladder by "newly married" .

Reminds me of the poem, "A reason, A season, or a lifetime.".

Spellbound, the poster is our friend, who we all love. It is her "friend" who has the issue.

 

[Zuri]

Zuri,
Just reading here and find this post incredibly sad since we love our special poster. I am so direct I would expect someone be direct with me also. Maybe avoiding the person at all costs, for posters own sanity is the answer. If the so called friend asks her why she is being avoided, she should be direct and no nonsense about it. What said friend is doing to our poster is nothing short of cruelty. Btw, I saw the beautiful pictures of the shower and what you did for her was absolutely amazing. God bless you!

You are so sweet CII. Thank you for the compliment! I think that "friend" is cruel as well and she has done some of the cruelest, meanest things I have ever known a grown woman to do, who professed to be her "friend".

 

[Zuri]

For our SB Horse Loving Friends

Fewer than one percent of births of twin horses are successful. But after three weeks of constant care and comfort, these twin foals are heading home! What a miraculous story.

http://www.pawmygosh.com/horse-rare-birth/

A friend of mine's mare had twins that were a surprise. Typically, twins can be determined shortly after breeding, when the vet does the 14 or 28 day check. The vet will usually pinch off one of the embryos, resulting in only one goal being carried to term. The foals in the video were really good sized!

 

[Zuri]

I know I am opening a painful can of worms here, and I only wish the very best for the bride, but I must admit, when I read of how quickly everything happened,a sense of unease that history may be repeating itself . Maybe the long time friend also felt that unease.

At least you are gracious! Whether the "friend" was uneasy or not, she never addressed it with our poster, never asked a question, never expressed any interest in the journey. I was also a little uneasy at first, but found her to be genuinely happy and so I was happy for her. Once I met the groom, I was even happier, because he is such a nice guy.

 

[Zuri]

Zuri, could your friend be jealous ,and feel like she'd been dumped after years of friendship? Or could
she see her longtime friend being manipulated and isolated by an abuser?

UnFortunately, our poster friend's "friend" is just plain mean. I only met her once, at the bridal shower. She arrived 30 minutes late (holding everyone up), with wet hair, tolerated the shower for less than an hour and left early with a BS excuse. IMO she is one of those people that think the world owes them a living and all the attention. What a shame.

 

[neesaki]

Geez, behind again. How is everyone ? I have a problem with time, does anyone else have that problem ? I can loose days, and then before I know it it's been a week. Gotta get caught up now. Love to all. :loveyou: This is somewhat of a sad song, but it's been one of my favorites for years. I remember hearing it play on my ex's and mine alarm every morning for months. Weird, thinking about it, haven't woken up to music for years... not going to count, LOL.
[video=youtube;2fTKhZIH2oU]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2fTKhZIH2oU[/video]

 

[Zuri]

Niner, I am so glad your brother is getting the proper medical attention. I had assumed his doctor had sent him to specialists who made the diagnosis and prognosis. I am truly sorry he had to experience what he did. Wishing him health and healing.

 

[neesaki]

Hello! :seeya:

Gerard!!! So good to see you back !!! :happydance:

 

[neesaki]

We had another earthquake a bit ago. It felt like a car had ran into the house. I wonder what type of one it was. If it was a induction or a slip strike. It felt much stronger then the last one.

An earthquake? Seriously? Gosh I'm behind...