Rocket, you're trying to make sense in your world, not hers. It's kind of like trying to understand how someone acts in crisis mode, but you're not in crisis. I lost one of my children once at a park and ran through a plate glass window, right through it. Didn't even see it, I was in such a panic. Looking back I snicker at how stupid I was, but I was in crisis mode, my child was missing and I didn't even see the plate glass window. ET is a child and she's used to having adults tell her what to do and she follows without question. It's amazing, but even teens will do what they're told by an adult even if they feel scared or that it's wrong because they're taught to do what the adult tells them. It's why, even years later, if you have to meet with a principal at a school for your own child you will often get a bit panicky and revert to how you felt as a child when you were called to the office. It's why if your mother calls you and tells you to clean your room, even at 40, you'll feel compelled to do it. So we have a 15 year old child, a teacher who is making demands and she's compelled to do what he wants even if she doesn't want to and he's old enough to know this so he plays on her youthful indecision. "I know you want to end things, but I just want to say goodbye" or "I understand, but I wanted to do this one thing for you before we end things" or even worse "you need to talk to me face to face or I'll tell your father you said, or did or wrote blah blah". Remember these children also feel that what they are doing is wrong and they can misinterpret the anger being directed at the adult, to the themselves. It's why children blame themselves for parents' divorces. All they see is anger and they feel they're bad (added to the fact that she feels ugly) and they're just begging for the guilt in the situation. This guilt is something that predators use to their advantage. Every child who has been abused feels they are the one at fault, not one or some, but every one of them. And that gets further twisted by the predator who uses it to control their victim. It's impossible to understand as an adult, an even harder to understand when we're sitting in a safe place.
