CO- Dylan Redwine, 13, Vallecito, 19 November 2012 - #43

[Confusion]

Which is exactly why I said the following under the quoted section - and included the quoted section to begin with as well:

"but this list/explanation might help people to better understand why there are so many behaviors that might overlap, and how truly hard it is to diagnose exactly what is wrong with someone. And how hard it is to rule out behaviors based on typical behavior of those with certain mental illnesses." (BBM)

I don't know... maybe I'm just tired, but the first part of your post coming directly after my post, with the sarcastic tone doesn't exactly fit in with the last comment you made.

It certainly does feel like criticism... I clearly stated that it was a layman's opinion, but that doesn't mean I'm absolutely uninformed on the issues of mental illness.

I am also well-aware that a psychologist/psychiatrist/social worker would not diagnose someone without interviewing them personally, giving them assessment tests, etc...

I'm not going to argue any further, but if you truly weren't trying to criticize someone, please remember sarcasm is very hard to convey through printed media. Thanks...

Sorry, I added that part at the end because I was afraid you would think I was criticizing you for your post. It just hit me (when reading yours) how often we do that. This person is obviously a sociopath because xyz, this person is obviously a narcissist because xyz, this person has borderline personality disorder because xyz, etc., etc., etc. But I know from experience how hard it is to properly diagnose any of those things. Still, some people just jump out as poster children for certain disorders!

 

[ColdHands]

I see Mark as responsible for:
Insisting on visitation for the week if Dylan didn't want to go (I think that had been proven, but I am not sure)
Insisting Dylan go with him instead of to his friend's house. Most likely, Dylan would still be here if he had let Dylan go.
Not getting Dylan up in the morning to go to his friend's house, when he knew Dylan wanted to go there. Assuming Dylan was alive at the time, Dylan would probably be here if he had made Dylan get up (assuming that Dylan really didn't want to get up, which I don't actually assume)
Not searching for his son as soon as he got home and found him missing. Might or might not have made any difference.
Not calling (and I mean CALLING, not texting) Dylan's mother when Dylan hadn't been accounted for for 9 hours (from 7:30 to 4:30 since Mark had not seen him during that time, and he had not yet spoken to the mail person)
Not searching for his son at all. (There might be a valid reason, but I haven't seen what it is)

Those are some of the things I see him responsible for. There are more, of course, but those are the ones that got me started wondering. His inability to answer a direct question is the one that keeps me wondering.

Thank you, Ghostwheel, this is a well-ordered, logical list. I'm not sure about the first item but I understand why you would include it and the rest I agree with. Mark definitely has responsibility even if he is not guilty of a crime.

SODDI = Some other dude did it

I'm still at 50/50 Mark vs Someone Else. And that's because -

1) we have very few facts. I haven't seen anything that says LE is looking harder at Mark than anyone else. Yes, they searched his property and vehicles but we know they also went to Elaine's so that's probably SOP for missing children, and Mark's is the last place Dylan was reported to be. We also have been told that "all of the adults in Dylan's life" were given polygraphs but LE will not say who or what the results were. ER says LE is trying to get the uncut version of the show, but there were several people on that show and I still consider the mail lady story to be a huge hole in the facts that have been made public - it's possible IMO that LE would want to change ER's description of "never been confirmed" to "proven to be someone else."

2) I give Dylan a little bit of credit. I have two sons (12 and 15) that I love, that love me, that are very close to me. We talk a lot, we hang out together, I know most of their friends because they usually are here spending the night on weekends. I have passwords to their phone, Facebook and email accounts. But I could not on any day tell you exactly what they would watch on tv, or if they even would watch tv, or eat for breakfast or who they would hang out with, because they are old enough to make choices and they do make choices based on what they feel like doing at that moment. Unless Dylan was a one-note wonder, I believe he probably did his own thing. So I do believe he could very well have stopped texting Sunday night just because he was bored with texting or interested in a movie or too tired or annoyed at someone and ended a conversation by turning off his phone. And I believe it is very possible that he could change his mind Monday morning about getting up early on the first day of his thanksgiving break. Or that he might not have texted just because he didn't feel like it. Or that he might have gone outside or walked down the road. I don't think those are things that can be 100% stated against.

3) Mark still gets 50% of my attention because of all of the things that have been said here already. I don't feel the need to diagnose him with anything. I see him currently acting the way his exes described his historical behaviors and I think it's not logical to believe he is capable of acting any different than he has been. He may or may not be guilty of a crime but I can empathize with Elaine and understand her anger.

 

[ColdHands]

I'm taking a guess here and thinking that Mark thought he would be taking the poly at the show's backstage area somewhere, not taken to the polygrapher at another location. But that is just my opinion.

Does anyone else think that polygrapher sounds like someone who married several graphs? Is it just me?

BBM
I'm struggling with your last question, Ghost, could you restate it?

Also are you a fan of Zelazny? (Your user name )

 

[Confusion]

BBM
I'm struggling with your last question, Ghost, could you restate it?

Also are you a fan of Zelazny? (Your user name )

I believe it's making a reference to the similarity between polygrapher and polygamist. :twocents:

 

[ColdHands]

I believe it's making a reference to the similarity between polygrapher and polygamist. :twocents:

:floorlaugh: I'm laughing at myself now for being so dense!

 

[FruitTingles]

I don't get it; what does that little figure pointing his finger mean?

Seriously.

Thanks.

Laughing/giggling? Sorry, It makes me laugh.

 

[Money Girl]

On DP, day 2, when asked directly in the presence of DP and Mr. T if he had anything to do with DR's disappearance, he said 'no', but nodded his head yes.

Then, he is reinforcing his "No" answer in a positive manner.

 

[Tonto]

:doh: We have this one, or is that not what you are looking for?

Oh. Didn't see that one. Wish they would add this one though.

:rocker:

 

[katydid23]

A little OT but Websleuths needs a facepalm emoticon.

:doh: :doh: :doh:

 

[aust amateur slueth]

<Mod Snip>

when I look in Elaine's eyes, I see a horrible pain

but when I look in Mark's ... I see nothing


just :twocents:

I agree, ER's eyes show the depth of her pain, total utter tormented anguish.

MR is blank, theres no emotion at all.


I saw on SM that LE has spent the last 3 days in and around the Vallecito area including door knocking, which I think is really interesting only 10 days after the Dr Phil episodes.

 

[Ronald99]

I'm rewatching part two Dr Phil show.

Betsy confronted MR stating she just wants to hear the truth due to the ever changing stories.
Betsy __ your story has changed
MR __ know it hasn't it in what way specifically in what way has my story changed__
Betsy __ you said you went to Tristan's house and talked to him, and he didn't see Dylan __
Your next story was _ that you went to Tristan's house and nobody was there.__ So how could you talk to somebody that isn't there ?

MR __ To respond to that _ if i may, i i attempted to go to Tristan's house and talk to him but he didn't answer the door,__ i assumed that possibly him and Dylan were at the lake, _ you know the "fishing pole" has never been found, i assumed that maybe that was a possibility do i know for a fact that he had a "fishing Pole" absolutely not.

Cory __ When you go into your house the fishing Pole" is in the garage_ you didn't walk thru the garage and into the house --
MR __ Theres several places thet that "fishing pole" is -
Cory and MR talking together --
Cory __ it was always in the garage __
MR __ it was either next to the TV
Cory __ and how come that's the first _ you noticed that before his bike _ before his footprints
MR __ Well you sure know a lot you sure you
Cory __ I've investigated in my mind since its happened --
MR __ Well boy then then why do we have Legal Enforce or Law Enforcement involved when we got "you two"on it -
Cory __ because they have to deal with people like you who won't tell then the answers, who won't cooperate --

 

[katydid23]

Betsy confronted MR stating she just wants to hear the truth due to the ever changing stories.
Betsy __ your story has changed
MR __ know it hasn't it in what way specifically in what way has my story changed__
Betsy __ you said you went to Tristan's house and talked to him, and he didn't see Dylan __
Your next story was _ that you went to Tristan's house and nobody was there.__ So how could you talk to somebody that isn't there ?

MR __ To respond to that _ if i may, i i attempted to go to Tristan's house and talk to him but he didn't answer the door,__ i assumed that possibly him and Dylan were at the lake, _ you know the "fishing pole" has never been found, i assumed that maybe that was a possibility do i know for a fact that he had a "fishing Pole" absolutely not.
============================================

Notice that he NEVER answers her question. He says " let me respond to that..." and then he deflects and goes on to something different instead of answering her specific
question, which was WHY did he tell conflicting versions of going to Tristan's.

 

[asyousay]

I still find it highly dodgy he noticed the fishing pole missing but didn't notice Dylan's rucksack being gone.

 

[Abstar80]

I would also imagine that Elaine was under considerable "pressure" when she passed her poly. Just something to consider.

With all due respect.....I would hardly call it the same kind of pressure. She would be under the single strand of pressure of having a missing son. MR is under pressure from every angle.

Everyone is on about how he hasn't been out looking for his son. I am willing to bet the farm that the man is scared of going out. Considering the to and fro that has happened here even, not to mention the fb stuff, does anybody really think that he hasn't been the victim of threats etc that would make it hard for him to go out.

I really wish the subject of the poly would be dropped....It seems the whole issue of MR not taking, failing etc the poly is what most people have based the "guilty" verdict on.....Please think of Breann Rodriguez' parents, if using this as an anchor for a decision.

 

[asyousay]

With all due respect.....I would hardly call it the same kind of pressure. She would be under the single strand of pressure of having a missing son. MR is under pressure from every angle.

Everyone is on about how he hasn't been out looking for his son. I am willing to bet the farm that the man is scared of going out. Considering the to and fro that has happened here even, not to mention the fb stuff, does anybody really think that he hasn't been the victim of threats etc that would make it hard for him to go out.

I really wish the subject of the poly would be dropped....It seems the whole issue of MR not taking, failing etc the poly is what most people have based the "guilty" verdict on.....Please think of Breann Rodriguez' parents, if using this as an anchor for a decision.

Not at all , it just another nail in the coffin for me.

His story from day one has not added up and the fact he drinks the night before he is due to take a polygraph just sums up his actions from day one.

Mark is about Mark and the rest of the family are all doing there best for Dylan. Mark should learn compassion and start putting Dylan before his own wants and needs!

:cow: :cow: :moo:

 

[FruitTingles]

With all due respect.....I would hardly call it the same kind of pressure. She would be under the single strand of pressure of having a missing son. MR is under pressure from every angle.

Everyone is on about how he hasn't been out looking for his son. I am willing to bet the farm that the man is scared of going out. Considering the to and fro that has happened here even, not to mention the fb stuff, does anybody really think that he hasn't been the victim of threats etc that would make it hard for him to go out.

I really wish the subject of the poly would be dropped....It seems the whole issue of MR not taking, failing etc the poly is what most people have based the "guilty" verdict on.....Please think of Breann Rodriguez' parents, if using this as an anchor for a decision.

ITA! Thanks

 

[aust amateur slueth]

With all due respect.....I would hardly call it the same kind of pressure. She would be under the single strand of pressure of having a missing son. MR is under pressure from every angle.

Everyone is on about how he hasn't been out looking for his son. I am willing to bet the farm that the man is scared of going out. Considering the to and fro that has happened here even, not to mention the fb stuff, does anybody really think that he hasn't been the victim of threats etc that would make it hard for him to go out.

I really wish the subject of the poly would be dropped....It seems the whole issue of MR not taking, failing etc the poly is what most people have based the "guilty" verdict on.....Please think of Breann Rodriguez' parents, if using this as an anchor for a decision.

with all due respect the pressure he is under is of his own making. Had he been talking to ER and answered her questions then IMO it would be totally different. The fact that he hid himself away for the first 2 months, has been so evasive and continually tries to blame shift speak volumes.

He chose not to participate in getting attention from the media for his son, he chose not to attend events organised to help raise a reward for his son and he chose not to donate to the reward.

He then chose not to take the opportunity of taking a polygraph to help undo some of the damage he has done to himself.

IMO polygraph or not he has shown that he is more concerned with his reputation and ego more than he is concerned about his son who has been missing for nearly 4 months.

 

[mmmagique]

I suppose this answers my question with regard to having a bit of discipline the night before a national tv show about your missing child....this only leaves 2 choices:

1. MR is an alcoholic.
2. MR was using a drunken stupor as an excuse to avoid the scheduled poly.

I truly don't think mr could have the problems you linked to (not that you agreed with them) and keep a cdl license...

 

[aust amateur slueth]

double post sorry

 

[Abstar80]

with all due respect the pressure he is under is of his own making. Had he been talking to ER and answered her questions then IMO it would be totally different. The fact that he hid himself away for the first 2 months, has been so evasive and continually tries to blame shift speak volumes.

He chose not to participate in getting attention from the media for his son, he chose not to attend events organised to help raise a reward for his son and he chose not to donate to the reward.

He then chose not to take the opportunity of taking a polygraph to help undo some of the damage he has done to himself.

IMO polygraph or not he has shown that he is more concerned with his reputation and ego more than he is concerned about his son who has been missing for nearly 4 months.

I kind of think that until we have spent every day with MR before and after the 18th November, we have no way of knowing what he has or has not done to find his child. Just because he is not out there screaming from the rooftops and fronting every single camera he can get his hands on, doesn't mean he isn't concerned for his child and it also doesn't mean he isn't doing anything to try and find his son. There is no confirmation from anyone other than ER that MR is not doing anything.

MR has been accused of being guilty from the minute ER got the phone call about DR...except that time she changed her mind in January for a little while....

http://www.krdo.com/news/Redwine-fa...ance/-/417220/18076238/-/npdmtsz/-/index.html