And a person doesn't get to this stage of coldness and dead in their soul -- overnight.
Were there warning signs that were missed ?
Did no one see what she was like until now ?
Were people afraid of her ?
What we witnessed in that "redo" at the end of Spencer's interview with her gives us some insight, I think. In the flash of a second, indeed a mere millisecond, she went from completely dry-eyed, utterly detached, "Oh, Gannon was a sweet boy" to the sobbing, pleading, "Gannon, please come home" heart-broken stepmom. Clearly she could turn it on and off at will.
I agree that no one becomes that phony, that cold, and that dead overnight. It takes sin upon sin to become that hollow. They say sin is its own punishment and that sin darkens the intellect. I believe both are true. The more one lies, the more one deceives, the more one harms others - the easier it becomes and the emptier and darker they become. The more unreal and out of touch with reality they become. The more evil they become.
Were there warning signs that others missed? My experience with narcissists is that they demonstrate two primary behaviors: gaslighting and rage. It's not just that they lie; they lie with such self-confidence and such aggression that even those who know they are lying, are sure they are lying, actually end up questioning themselves and their own perception of reality. As a result, without intending to, they end up letting the liar get away with the lies. And the more they get away with them, the more confident they grow in them. And the more confident they grow in them, the more prone to anger they become when they're challenged. The narcissist's rage is a thing to behold, especially how quickly it can be triggered. Combine those two behaviors and gradually, over time, those around them get worn down: they question their own perceptions and yes, grow fearful of making the narcissist angry. It causes them to miss many red flags.
Did people not see who and what she was? Keep in mind that even Landen said she trusted her. Al said he gave more to her than to anyone else in his life. Neither would have done that had they seen what she was. So how do you explain that? MOO? By the third and fourth behaviors that narcissists tend to demonstrate and excel at: flattery and generosity. They can be very charming and very flattering. They want above all to be loved and admired and they do things that cause others to love and admire them.
But that too can be turned on and off like a light switch. Their emotions for others are never genuine, but rather based in achieving the goal of being loved and admired. And if it fails to work? If the spouse begins to turn away, or the employer not be impressed? It's like when their lies are challenged: it can provoke the most intense rage.