clipped for simplicity
I agree with most of your post, so I'm not arguing. Just lending some insight to the bolded.
I think a lot of parents don't wait it out for the meds to balance. With my step brother I was a caretaker. Diagnosed young with bipolar quite young, but now on antipsychotics with a couple labels. I fed him, I calmed him, I tucked him in at night. When I saw him in the hospital, I was SO ANGRY that they were letting people do this to him. I still can't help but admit that my intuitive feeling was that it was harmful for him, and that a healthy home life could have really gone further than the hospital, but I digress.
And, yes, he could be violent and he had major rages- but there was also a sweet and precarious quality about this child. Adorable dimples, round cheeks, broad smile. Until the meds balanced, that was completely gone. He seemed empty, and it's hard to see.
Anyway, eventually they found the right balance of meds and we got to get to that "sweet spot." I think a lot of apprehensive parents throw in the towel before they get there.
As a mom, it's hard to know when to listen to that inner voice, and when to trust others.