I also think the fact that her mother and grandmother were there when she started massive bleeding and the PICU jumped into Code Blue mode make this all the more stunning and dramatic. I don't want to denigrate anyone's grief, but the shock of seeing her bleeding and the collapse starts this surreal journey. Then, an attorney shows up and takes over.
Would it have been any easier if she had had a drowning or a stroke or a gunshot, or something that didn't happen in front of their eyes? I don't know.
Just one additional detail-- according to the family's spokesman, there was at least one other family member present when Jahi's hemorrhage began. The family members who "assisted" in trying to stem or suction the bleeding were Nailah Winkfield (Jahi's mother), Marvin Winkfield (Jahi's stepfather), Sandra Chatham (Jahi's grandmother, LVN) and, sadly, Jahi McMath herself.
The family spokesperson in both excerpts below is Omari Sealey (brother of Nailah Winkfield, Jahi's uncle).
http://www.csnbayarea.com/article/girl-brain-dead-after-tonsils-out
"...At the same time, Sealey said it appeared to the family as though the nursing staff had vanished during what seemed to be a shift change. In the family's minds, there didn't seem to be enough hospital staff in the room to help.
The family started suctioning blood themselves;
Jahi's grandmother, Sandra Chatman, is a nurse at another hospital.


'A 13-year-old should not have to suction herself,' Sealey said. 'She had to use a suction machine to suction her own blood.
Her mother and stepfather had to suction out her blood at points. None of them work for this hospital.'."
Please note: the comment regarding lack of nursing support is, IMO, seems to be modified by Mr. Sealey in another interview.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/12/21/jahi-mcmath-life-support_n_4485119.html
Family members said there were containers of Jahi's blood in the room, and hospital staff members were providing transfusions to counteract the blood loss.
JMO, but I think the fact that Mrs. Winkfield can't see the signs of death as health care professionals see them make it very difficult for her to believe that her daughter has died. Maybe if Jahi's body was cold to the touch it would be easier to understand Jahi was dead. Maybe if Jahi's young heart had stopped sooner, it would be easier for accept that Jahi was dead. Warmth and a beating heart sure give the illusion of life.