Mod's if this post should go somewhere else please feel free to remove.
Below is a letter I found on a Meth info site, (I sent it to the family caring for my niece so when she finds out about her moms Meth/Perc use, maybe she will understand, it's the drugs...)
I saw posts earlier about Lindsey, ... Sometimes you just want to believe they are "not going to do it again"...
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Dear Family:
I am a meth addict. I am your son or daughter, your brother or sister, your mom or dad, your husband or wife, and I am a meth addict.
You don't know me anymore. I don't know me anymore. Please don't act surprised by my insane behavior. Please don't expect anything from me except lies and manipulation. Please hide your valuables, because I will steal them if I have to just to get more meth.
I don't know why I do meth, and I don't know why I can't stop. Part of me wants to, but most of me doesn't. I am angry most of the time if I don't have any meth, and I am on top of the world when I do have meth. Nothing else matters to me except meth.
I know I'm supposed to love you, but right now the only thing I am capable of loving is meth. I love meth more than I love my life, more than I love anything else in the world.
I would die for meth. I might even kill for meth. And when I have run out of meth, I may become violent towards anyone who tries to get in my way.
I know you don't understand it, and neither do I, but it is where I am at right now and I don't know how change it, or if I even want to. I believe that I cannot live without meth, and that if I try to, I will die. In fact, I would rather die than live without meth.
I am sick and tired, but I cannot stop. I will say anything to get you to help me get more meth. Anything. I will promise to go to rehab. I will tell you I need money for food. I will do anything, even sell my own body, to make sure that I never run out of meth.
As long as you keep believing my lies, I will use you to get what I need, and what I need is meth, and only meth.
When I am high, I feel no emotions. I feel nothing except invincible. You can threaten me all you want, I will not care one bit. I am confident and I don't need any of you as long as I have my meth.
When I am crashing, I am a monster. Stay away from me. I will not hesitate to do or say whatever I can to hurt you, because misery loves company and I am miserable without meth.
I am delusional and I will blame you for everything that is wrong with my life. I am paranoid and I know people are following me and that you are part of the conspiracy. I trust no one. I put all of my faith, all of my loyalty in meth, and only meth.
You don't know me anymore. I don't know me anymore. I am but a shell of a human being now, so don't come looking for your son or daughter, your brother or sister, your mom or dad, your husband or wife, in me. I may look like that person to you, but that person is gone, for now.
I am a meth addict. It is a full time job.
Help me get more meth, or leave me alone. I do not need you unless you will help me feed my burning desire for meth. So either help me do that, or just stay the hell away from me.
One last thing: I know you are disappointed in me, but believe me, nobody is more disappointed in me than I am. The only thing that relieves my shame and guilt and remorse is...meth.
Signed,
Me
