I think they know it’s her fault. However, JC is still her daughter and A’s mother. They will always have some love for her. I would think they will visit her at some point. I had to cut off contact with my own father due to his abusive behavior...I miss him everyday. The logical part of me knows he’s not good for me and never was, but the child in me still loves him and wishes he could love me like a father should love their children. He even send me a short handwritten note stating “I’m sorry I don’t know how to love. I wish I could.” He came from a heinously abusive childhood where he watched his mother beaten and his father hit him daily and told him he was worthless. He unfortunately turned out only slightly better than his own father. I still love him so much. It’s hard to explain, but I have gone years with no contact and even though I know it’s for the best...I think about him often.
I once had a false CPS allegation made against me. It was ludicrous. Someone reported they saw me at my 6 year old son’s school refusing to wipe his bottom after he did number two. They said I forced a staff member to carry him to my car because “he was dirty and I don’t want to touch him”. Most bizzare story. Anyway, the caseworker went to his school first and interviewed him alone and then came to my home. I opened the door and she explained the situation. I laughed out loud, it was my first reaction. I asked her if she’d talked to my son and she laughed a little and said yes.
I asked her what he said and he told her “What? I’m 6 years old! I know how to wipe my own butt!” Then she said “Oh I know you’re a big boy but if you did need help cleaning or bathing would your mommy help you?” He looked at her thoughtfully and said “Well, one time I was playing Minecraft and it takes so long to wipe my bottom I asked my mom to do it because she’s faster and she did!” Haha! The caseworker and I both laughed. She said he appeared happy, clean and intelligent.
She came in and we talked. My house was spotless as always. She said it sounded ridiculous especially after she talked to my son and she sort of groaned and was apologetic. She told me I’d get a letter within four weeks. I did not so I called her to follow up and she said the report was closed as unfounded and they didn’t even send a findings letter because it wasn’t even necessary to take it there. This was last year.
Still have no idea who or why someone would make such a weird report. I was glad they talked to my child alone at school first. This way they knew for sure I couldn’t have coached him what to say. I always think it’s crazy when I hear of caseworkers talking to caregivers first and then the children as if this doesn’t give the caregiver the opportunity to scare the child into lying.
