JLM: What Do We Know About Him? - #3

[FindHG]

Virginia Wesleyan College Admits It Helped Accused Rapist, But Wants Him To Pay Damages
By Tyler Kingkade 10/30/2014 6:59 pm EDT
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/10/30/virginia-wesleyan-lawsuit_n_6077780.html?utm_hp_ref=college

"The transfer of sexual offenders from one school to another is drawing fresh concern in the case of Jesse Matthew Jr. in Virginia. Matthew was accused of sexual assault at two colleges in Virginia, but never faced criminal charges. He's now jailed on charges of abducting and defiling University of Virginia student Hannah Graham, whose body was discovered this month, and was indicted on separate charges related to a 2005 rape in Fairfax, Virginia."

 

[ThinkHard]

When all of this happened hardly matters does it? From the reports of people who know him he came from a family who cared about him! Certainly 'good enough' parenting that it would not have have created, or given any excuse for being a rapist or murderer!! Does 'pure evil' exist on this planet, that which was not 'caused'!

We'll look around you my friend!

JMO

I do not think we know what JLM's family life was really like. I have no doubts he was very much loved by his family. But even children who grow up in not great environments are loved by their parents....that's a pretty unbreakable bond....and I'm not really sure loving a child automatically means he had a good home life. As far as parenting goes...sometimes what you would do for a typical child is not what a child with a potential LD, or other issues might need....so while he might have gotten "good enough" parenting....it still may not have been the parenting LJ needed. The truth is we don't know, we don't know what he struggled with, we don't know his family life....but from everything I have seen and read I do not get the same sense about his family life that you do.

 

[Yevhen]

I do not think we know what JLM's family life was really like. I have no doubts he was very much loved by his family. But even children who grow up in not great environments are loved by their parents....that's a pretty unbreakable bond....and I'm not really sure loving a child automatically means he had a good home life. As far as parenting goes...sometimes what you would do for a typical child is not what a child with a potential LD, or other issues might need....so while he might have gotten "good enough" parenting....it still may not have been the parenting LJ needed. The truth is we don't know, we don't know what he struggled with, we don't know his family life....but from everything I have seen and read I do not get the same sense about his family life that you do.

Thank you for your reply! I suppose that none of us will know for sure the forces to bear in forming JM, and contributing (if found guilty) to his actions! The old 'nurture verses nature' debate! I believe to a large degree it is the later, but this could be debated for ever. And has been! I guess we will not know much more until the trial, and I will not miss a minute of it!

 

[jamicat]

I can;t come with a better word to describe JM or anyone who would do what he did than "evil".

 

[Ollie]

Psychopaths differ genetically ,they don't have the genetic link that connections emotions. They may 'act sympathic' to someone but can't feel sympathy. I've been reading a lot about psychopaths. One common trait they have is the 'stare'. You know when someone flirts they get or give a longer look; when you meet someone you may give a brief eye contact. The psychopath ' stares' , almost to the point of rude; like a mental challenge. It is their method of control immediately. Just beware of this trait. Remember in Galveston the woman who turned him in to LE,she said he leaned over the console and he 'stared intently' at her.

 

[Enni]

It's word that is a judgement with some understanding. You're all talking about the same thing, but it is a concept well worth understanding. Below are definitions and a exploration of the concept of evil.

http://www.oxforddictionaries.com/us/definition/american_english/evil

http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/evil

http://plato.stanford.edu/entries/concept-evil/

Agreed! Thanks for those links.

IIRC, an NBC News headline contained the following understatement of the year: "Jesse Matthew, Suspect in Hannah Graham Case, Has History of Bad Acts." Bad acts?! That's not the name for what JLM stands accused of having done.

But trying to understand factors that may have contributed to JLM's development / actions in no way excuses or justifies the behavior. It just may make it easier to spot others with similar characteristics, either to find ways to stop it early on, or to avoid such monsters entirely. Things might have gone differently if Liberty U and / or Christoper Newport U had done more than simply expel JLM from their schools for what was criminal behavior. Instead, they took the easy way out and left him to do much more damage. Our society needs to start treating rape as the serious crime it is instead of confusing it with sexual behavior. Too many women and children have been abused and stigmatized while the perpetrators are free to continue to victimize. It's shameful.

 

[ThinkHard]

Thank you for your reply! I suppose that none of us will know for sure the forces to bear in forming JM, and contributing (if found guilty) to his actions! The old 'nurture verses nature' debate! I believe to a large degree it is the later, but this could be debated for ever. And has been! I guess we will not know much more until the trial, and I will not miss a minute of it!

I did read something interesting, once, and I thought it was a really good way of explaining it. Basically they compared children to flowers...and how most kids are like dandelions, they grow and keep growing, in a variety of settings. But other kids are more like orchids, incredibly sensitive to even small influences in their environment.

This analogy shows how both nature (genetics - type of flower), and nurture (the environment), play a role in a child's development, but what it additionally does is point out how a nature difference at the genetic, can greatly effect how much a child is influenced by the nurture components of their environment.

From my years of working with children and loads of research this analogy really sums it up. The problem is that so much of a human beings character is formed in the first six years of life. So early intervention is very important.

 

[ThinkHard]

Psychopaths differ genetically ,they don't have the genetic link that connections emotions. They may 'act sympathic' to someone but can't feel sympathy. I've been reading a lot about psychopaths. One common trait they have is the 'stare'. You know when someone flirts they get or give a longer look; when you meet someone you may give a brief eye contact. The psychopath ' stares' , almost to the point of rude; like a mental challenge. It is their method of control immediately. Just beware of this trait. Remember in Galveston the woman who turned him in to LE,she said he leaned over the console and he 'stared intently' at her.

I think its empathy that you meant to say. Psychopaths lack empathy. Sympathy is feeling sorry for someone, but empathy is putting your self in someone's shoes. The correct term for this is Theory of Mind. Anyway its the empathy component that is often studied. Its similar to sympathy but they are different.

 

[Yevhen]

I did read something interesting, once, and I thought it was a really good way of explaining it. Basically they compared children to flowers...and how most kids are like dandelions, they grow and keep growing, in a variety of settings. But other kids are more like orchids, incredibly sensitive to even small influences in their environment.

This analogy shows how both nature (genetics - type of flower), and nurture (the environment), play a role in a child's development, but what it additionally does is point out how a nature difference at the genetic, can greatly effect how much a child is influenced by the nurture components of their environment.

From my years of working with children and loads of research this analogy really sums it up. The problem is that so much of a human beings character is formed in the first six years of life. So early intervention is very important.

So then JM was of the orchid variety, and although loved, he was not loved and supported in a way that he needed! How would you determine the type of direction an 'orchid' would need even if you find them at a very young age I wonder! Certainly children raised reasonably equally in a loving family can turn out very differently! Very interesting!

 

[Yevhen]

I did read something interesting, once, and I thought it was a really good way of explaining it. Basically they compared children to flowers...and how most kids are like dandelions, they grow and keep growing, in a variety of settings. But other kids are more like orchids, incredibly sensitive to even small influences in their environment.

This analogy shows how both nature (genetics - type of flower), and nurture (the environment), play a role in a child's development, but what it additionally does is point out how a nature difference at the genetic, can greatly effect how much a child is influenced by the nurture components of their environment.



From my years of working with children and loads of research this analogy really sums it up. The problem is that so much of a human beings character is formed in the first six years of life. So early intervention is very important.

So then JM was of the orchid variety, and although loved, he was not loved and supported in a way that he needed! How would you determine the type of direction an 'orchid' would need even if you find them at a very young age I wonder! Certainly children raised reasonably equally in a loving family can turn out very differently! Very interesting!

 

[Yevhen]

Sorry double post!

 

[Ollie]

No I don't mean empathy ;I said they lack genetically the hardwired brain connection to emotions from birth. Try not to 'think hard' for me.

 

[ThinkHard]

So then JM was of the orchid variety, and although loved, he was not loved and supported in a way that he needed! How would you determine the type of direction an 'orchid' would need even if you find them at a very young age I wonder! Certainly children raised reasonably equally in a loving family can turn out very differently! Very interesting!

Absolutely! But yes THE greatest challenge is identifying signs early, and integrating different ways to "educate". For example social things that most people learn sort of just be existing, are totally missed by other kids. For example, If you go through you're life missing out on these social queues, you are gonna go through your life, often very frustrated that you keep flubbing relationships and have no idea why. Kids who have problems with social queues either because they have ASD, or an auditory processing,..... or something more serious like a sociopathic personality....you need to point stuff out to them, in an non judge mental way. You need to tell them what signs to look for on someone's face if they are upset, or walk them through how their actions affected someone else....really its good practice for all kids, but kids who miss this social info especially need it. But often get labeled as having "selective hearing" , mis behaved, willfullness....etc etc etc.....instead of being seen as a kid who's not getting critical information.

This is my passion! This is my life's work, this is where my heart is....helping kids, understanding them, helping them develop strengths, and work on weakness, and love themselves....it breaks my heart when kids are misunderstood!

 

[ThinkHard]

No I don't mean empathy ;I said they lack genetically the hardwired brain connection to emotions from birth. Try not to 'think hard' for me.

No you said

"Psychopaths differ genetically ,they don't have the genetic link that connections emotions. They may 'act sympathic' to someone but can't feel sympathy. '"

Empathy vs sympathy is a different conversation then the genetic link. What word you would choose really wouldn't have an effect on the genetic link itself. But in all the research I have read on this topic, when they discuss, for example, functional MRI's and how the frontal lobe (emotions) interacts with other parts of the brain, and how these are different In psychopaths then how the frontal lobe of a normal person would interact with the rest of their brain...they always refer to analyzing these interactions as predictors of empathy. One such example of this word use is in the title of a book called "The Science of Evil: on Empathy and the Origins of Cruelty" written by Simon Baron Cohen who is a psychologist and neuroscientist at Cambridge.

But perhaps you have read different.

FWIW: though empathy and sympathy are very similar, what distinguishes them is that in sympathy you feel sorry for someone based on your OWN perspective....empathy is that you try to understand them from THEIR perspective (with the recognition that they may think and experience things differently then you).

They are distinctly different because someone can have the ability to sympathize with someone without having the ability for empathy....meaning they could feel bad that something bad happened to someone because they know they wouldn't want it to happen to them...but be unable to feel the emotions from the perspective of that person.

Here's an official comparison: http://www.vocabulary.com/articles/chooseyourwords/empathy-sympathy/

 

[RemingtonSteele]

U.Va. kidnap suspect's lawyer seeks test for sanity

http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/...w-fairfax-court-sex-assault-charges/18231607/

 

[human]

M

These is no excuse other than pure evil for JL's actions (if proven guilty)! It sounds like his mother and family were supportive of him. His mother moved to a good area away from gangs. Family members even accompanied him to the police station where he acquired his lawyer! Many start life with no support and with so many challenges yet go through life as upstanding citizens! JMO

Can't talk about the family, but the father's record has somewhat been posted.

Alcoholism is a factor in psychopathy

 

[human]

Absolutely! But yes THE greatest challenge is identifying signs early, and integrating different ways to "educate". For example social things that most people learn sort of just be existing, are totally missed by other kids. For example, If you go through you're life missing out on these social queues, you are gonna go through your life, often very frustrated that you keep flubbing relationships and have no idea why. Kids who have problems with social queues either because they have ASD, or an auditory processing,..... or something more serious like a sociopathic personality....you need to point stuff out to them, in an non judge mental way. You need to tell them what signs to look for on someone's face if they are upset, or walk them through how their actions affected someone else....really its good practice for all kids, but kids who miss this social info especially need it. But often get labeled as having "selective hearing" , mis behaved, willfullness....etc etc etc.....instead of being seen as a kid who's not getting critical information.

This is my passion! This is my life's work, this is where my heart is....helping kids, understanding them, helping them develop strengths, and work on weakness, and love themselves....it breaks my heart when kids are misunderstood!

Cortisol. Heightened awareness because of dysfunction.

Alcoholism in the family causes many dysfunctional issues.

Family systems.

So many issues.

 

[Emaa]

How has the 'nature vs nurture' argument changed over the years as science has advanced, showing proof of genetic and neurological causes?

 

[ThinkHard]

How has the 'nature vs nurture' argument changed over the years as science has advanced, showing proof of genetic and neurological causes?

Well that kind of depends on which school of psychological thought you were to look into. Behaviorist like Skinner, were very very much of the belief its nearly all nurture, and there is a strong lean toward it in psychoanalysis as well. Developmentalists however like Piaget and Erikson were more of the belief that we were strongly influenced by nature...they both described stages of development that lean this way. Though Erikkson also recognized with quite a bit of strength the influence nature had. Essentially saying each person goes through the same stages but can have one of two outcomes during that stage depending on the environmental factors at play...such as "trust vs mistrust" in infancy.

As our technology and thus medical knowledge has progressed, there has been a much stronger involvement of neuroscience within the field of psychology. Neuroscience is really fascinating...because it can show us how a neuro atypical brain responds to things...hugely valuable in terms of how we can develop better teaching methods to suit a neuro atypical brain....rather then essentially be trying to teach in a learning style that may be virtually impossible (neurobiologically) for their brain to learn. Obviously that's overly simplified.

The question of specific genes, is far too complex to get into here...but it is not always quite as simple as a single gene being affected...sometimes they see patterns in gene groups, or there is a partial part of a gene missing but not the whole gene. Also there can be more then one genetic deviations...in each set of parents...that can leads to a third and unpredictable gene mutation.

I think we will see that further research in genetics and neuroscience will enhance the scope with which we can see the influences of nature...but I do not think it will lesson the discussion btw which is stronger.

I do however believe that greater comprehension of how the brain itself is functioning in certain conditions, will enhance our ability for early and more effective intervention.

 

[Yevhen]

Cortisol. Heightened awareness because of dysfunction.

Alcoholism in the family causes many dysfunctional issues.

Family systems.

So many issues.

We live in an ago of disfunction, broken families, alcoholism, drug use and even prevalent use of SSRI'S ( which are thought to cause violence in many)! I wonder what percentage of children coming out of families with these problems grow up to be SK's and rapists!

I guess this is where the 'orchids' come in! The kids who are extremely sensitive to the problems caused by these conditions!